# Remembering Our Loved Ones During the Holiday Season



## SeaBreeze (Dec 23, 2016)

The Christmas season is often bittersweet for many seniors, as it's a time when we remember those who were close to us that are no longer here to celebrate with cheer, I'm feeling that way tonight.  Whether it's our parents, siblings, children, spouses or friends, we many times take a pause to honor their memory.  I've lost my parents, my brother and sister, my husband's parents (his Dad passed on Christmas Day many years ago), many other relatives and friends over the years.

Just posting this to let you know that if you're missing a dear loved one during this time of year, you're not alone.  My condolences and sympathy for your losses, they know the love lives on forever in our hearts.



​


----------



## SeaBreeze (Dec 23, 2016)

_*In the Light*_




*A shadow of joy flickered; it is me. 

I told you I wouldn't leave..

My spirit is with you. 

My memories, my thoughts are imbedded deep in your heart.*

*I still love you.

Do not for one moment think that you have been abandoned.

I am in the Light.





In the corner, in the hall, the car, the yard -- 

these are the places I stay with you. 

My spirit rises every time you pray for me,

but my energy comes closer to you.

Love does not diminish, it grows stronger. 

I am the feather that finds you in the yard, 

the dimmed light that grows brighter in your mind, 

I place our memories for you to see. 

We lived in our special way, 

a way that now has its focus changed. 

I still crave your understanding and

long for the many words of prayer and good fortune for my soul. 

I am in the Light.





As you struggle to adjust without me,

I watch silently. 

Sometimes I summon up all the strength of my new world to make you notice me.

Impressed by your grief, I try to impress my love deeper into your 

consciousness.

As you should, I call out to the Heavens for help. 

You should know that the fountain of youth does exist.

My soul is now healthy.

Your love sends me new found energy.

I am adjusting to this new world. 

I am with you and I am in the Light.





Please don't feel bad that you can't see me. 

I am with you wherever you go.

I protect you, just as you protected me so many times. 

Talk to me and somehow I will find a way to answer you.

Mother, father, son or daughter it makes no difference. 

Brother, sister, lover, husband or wife, it makes no difference.

Whatever our connection-friend or even foe-I see you with my new eyes. 

I am learning to help wherever you are, wherever I am needed. 

This can be done because I am in the Light.





When you feel despair, reach out to me. 

I will come. 

Our love for you truly does transcend from Heaven to Earth.

Finish your life with the enthusiasm and zest

that you had when we were together in the physical sense. 

You owe this to me, but more importantly, you owe it to yourself. 

Life continues for both of us.

I am with you because I love you and I am in the Light.*



_...author unknown_
​


----------



## jujube (Dec 24, 2016)

My dad had the most awful Christmas tie that lit up and he'd wear it to church every Christmas eve.  It embarrassed the heck out of me when I was a teen.

After he died, my husband as the senior male in the family, wore it once each Christmas as a tribute.

When my husband died, I passed it on to my brother-in-law who reluctantly puts it on for a few minutes.

My nephew is next in line, but he'll probably use it as part of an art installation or put it on one of his robotics.


----------



## Carla (Dec 24, 2016)

Very inspirational, SB. It says so much of what I feel inside my heart. I have never read anything like this before that expresses these thoughts-- it is the reason I don't feel so all alone. Thanks for that and Merry Christmas!


----------



## RadishRose (Dec 24, 2016)

Wow, that is so perfect!


----------



## Grumpy Ol' Man (Dec 24, 2016)

One of my high school classmates bought the newspaper in our small town some years ago.  Now, they publish once/week and it's mostly local gossip.  She has access to copies of the old newspapers running back close to 100 years.

She messaged me this week that she had run onto the "letters to Santa" from 1926.  That issue had a letter from my Mother to Santa.  Mom would have been 6 years old.  She asked for a doll.  She also asked for a wagon and red ball for her brother, my uncle.  He would have been 1 1/2 years old.

Our society's evolution to digital communication will have nothing like that for future generations.  Much is lost when we lose the ability to put things down on paper.


----------



## SeaBreeze (Dec 24, 2016)

What a wonderful story Grumpy, a letter from your mother to Santa, and she was so sweet to ask for a wagon and ball for her brother, I hope Santa granted her wishes. :sentimental:


----------



## Buckeye (Dec 24, 2016)

Seabreeze, I am generally one mean, hard core, old SOB, but your post brought tears to my eyes.  Thinking of those we've lost is just so hard to do.  Damn.

Thank you.


----------



## BlondieBoomer (Dec 24, 2016)

SeaBreeze, that's beautiful and appropriate. Thank you for posting it.


----------



## SeaBreeze (Dec 25, 2016)

You guys are very welcome. :love_heart:  This is probably the one thing that might unite us all during the Christmas season.


----------



## SeaBreeze (Dec 20, 2019)

_Warm wishes and Seasons Greetings going out to all of our friends here who have lost their precious loved ones.  Thinking of you especially during this Christmas time of year....hugs to all of you. 





_


----------



## Wren (Dec 21, 2019)

How we miss our loved ones
At this time of year
Precious  memories  haunt us
of those we held so dear
So raise a glass to each,
in the sadness we all share,
with a tearful glance,
towards that empty chair.....


----------



## CrackerJack (Dec 21, 2019)

Thank you Seabreeze


SeaBreeze said:


> _Warm wishes and Seasons Greetings going out to all of our friends here who have lost their precious loved ones.  Thinking of you especially during this Christmas time of year....hugs to all of you.
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Thank you so much for this wonderful Thread, SeaBreeze. Ive belonged to a few forums over the years and there was nothing like your Thread and nowhere to express our feelings and get comfort and solace. I will read this Thread regularly and feel good vibes flowing through to me.


----------



## Aunt Bea (Dec 21, 2019)

_“Our hearts grow tender with childhood memories and love of kindred, and we are better throughout the year for having, in spirit, become a child again at Christmas-time.”_ - Laura Ingalls Wilder


----------



## oldman (Dec 21, 2019)

I suffer with seasonal depression. For whatever reason, this year has been the worse. My parents were Mr. & Mrs. Christmas. It was all about family, recognizing and paying tribute for the reason for the season. We had some Christmas season. My parents were Episcopalian and as such; were involved in the church. 

Although SeaBreeze’s post is beautifully worded, words alone do not do it for me. I belong to a support group that meets once per month. Each year or so, we add or lose a few members. Last year, another one of our members committed suicide. She was such a nice lady and I never expected that she was hurting so bad.

BTW, I love the words, “I told you that I wouldn’t leave.” My mom told me that two days before she passed. 

This is all that I can write for now.


----------



## Ruthanne (Dec 21, 2019)

I would love to hear my mom ramble on about whatever was on her mind again...or hear my dad talk about current events, elections, his car and all the money he spent on repairs...it would be so nice.


----------



## treeguy64 (Dec 21, 2019)

All of my family, I still carry with me. I don't get sad during the holidays. I still talk to those who are no longer here. The most profound tune I ever sung, out of the hundreds and hundreds I've performed, I sung as a child, and it still resonates with me:

_"Row, row, row, your boat,
Gently down the stream,
Merrily, merrily, merrily, merrily,
Life is but a dream."_

I live in my dream, arranging my "realities" as I see fit. It's easy.......


----------



## Ladybj (Dec 21, 2019)

I am missing my sister that recently passed away, my mother, younger and older brother.  I know they will forever be in my heart.  I am moving very slowly dealing with my sister.  My heart goes out to all that have loss a love one.  Holidays can be very hard..it is for me this holiday season but I plan on enjoying as best I can.   Let's toast to all our loved ones that are no longer with us, they will forever be in our hearts. 

A BIG (((((((((((((((((((((((((((((HUG)))))))))))))))))) TO YOU ALL!!!!!    Much Love!!!


----------



## Ladybj (Dec 21, 2019)

SeaBreeze said:


> You guys are very welcome. :love_heart:  This is probably the one thing that might unite us all during the Christmas season.


Thank you...  I need that right about now!!!!!!!  Hugs back to you!!!


----------



## Linda Doc (Dec 21, 2019)

I’m glad I found this thread. I miss my parents and grandparents so much during the holiday season. My mother used to play her Christmas albums on the stereo when I was little and when I hear them now on the radio I feel such deep grief. She always made Christmas so special, and I consider myself so lucky.


----------



## Ruth n Jersey (Dec 21, 2019)

SeaBreeze, I missed this thread when you first posted it but I'm so happy to have found it now.
I miss my parents and grandparents and a host of other relatives so very much.

There are so many reminders during the holidays. Some are so subtle they would go unnoticed except for the person who has lost a loved one.

Last year my cousin who looks exactly like my Grandpa took out his pocket knife to carefully slice open the gift wrap on his present and then fold the paper neatly. My Grandpa did that same thing every Christmas.

My moms special dishes that she used for condiments. I still have them and won't use them for any other type of food. 

I could list many more. Sometimes I feel there is more sadness than joy as we age and go through the holiday season. I am grateful for my wonderful family I have now but I guess I'm greedy and I want it all and that is not to be.


----------



## Ruthanne (Dec 21, 2019)

Forgot to say I'm also missing my departed significant others, and my baby sister who passed at such a young age.  Words can't express how I'm feeling but I am feeling it..


----------



## oldman (Dec 22, 2019)

treeguy64 said:


> All of my family, I still carry with me. I don't get sad during the holidays. I still talk to those who are no longer here. The most profound tune I ever sung, out of the hundreds and hundreds I've performed, I sung as a child, and it still resonates with me:
> 
> _"Row, row, row, your boat,
> Gently down the stream,
> ...


I can relate to your post. One Sunday afternoon, I came down with a toothache. As the day went on, the pain worsened. I was 10 years old at the time. Also, it was Sunday and no dentists were available back then. My mom gave me a Bayer aspirin, sat down next to me, hugged me and sang, “Down In the Valley” to me over and over. For whatever reason, the pain did lessen.

Oh, yeah, I still remember the words to that song.


----------



## Lvstotrvl (Dec 22, 2019)

Thank you Seabreeze and all of you, your post and memories really help. I didn’t celebrate Christmas last year because I had lost my husband, I thought maybe this year would be a little easier. I just lost a good friend on December 19, so I wasn’t sure I would get thru this Christmas either. After reading all of your post I’m going to do the best that I can. Thank you all again!


----------



## Ruth n Jersey (Dec 22, 2019)

oldman said:


> I can relate to your post. One Sunday afternoon, I came down with a toothache. As the day went on, the pain worsened. I was 10 years old at the time. Also, it was Sunday and no dentists were available back then. My mom gave me a Bayer aspirin, sat down next to me, hugged me and sang, “Down In the Valley” to me over and over. For whatever reason, the pain did lessen.
> 
> Oh, yeah, I still remember the words to that song.


I can relate also. When I was a kid I was sick with whatever was going around in school. My mom had to go somewhere and my grandma came and sat with me in my bedroom. I had a toy guitar and she picked it up and strummed it as she sang South of the Border. I don't know why she picked that song but she knew all the words. Gene Autry was popular then maybe she heard it on the radio. 

I never forgot that song.


----------



## Ladybj (Dec 22, 2019)

Lvstotrvl said:


> Thank you Seabreeze and all of you, your post and memories really help. I didn’t celebrate Christmas last year because I had lost my husband, I thought maybe this year would be a little easier. I just lost a good friend on December 19, so I wasn’t sure I would get thru this Christmas either. After reading all of your post I’m going to do the best that I can. Thank you all again! ❤


Don't push yourself... I agree, do the best you can.


----------



## peramangkelder (Dec 22, 2019)

Thank you @SeaBreeze that tribute is inspirational and @Ladybj my Mum died on 21st November and I know how you feel


----------



## Judycat (Dec 22, 2019)

Thank you for this. My mood will be up and down until after Christmas.


----------

