# Do you ever find yourself alone on holidays?



## Uptosnuff (Jun 1, 2019)

This last Christmas, for the first time in my life, I spent alone, if only for a short time.  My husband was working and my adult daughter was at her boyfriend's.  I didn't think it would bother me all that much, but was surprised by how much it did.  I found myself getting more and more depressed until my daughter came back home.  I come from a large extended family, but over the years we have really grown apart.  Everyone has their own families now and their own traditions.

It made me think of all the people out there who don't have anyone to share with and what are my own future holidays going to look like?


----------



## moviequeen1 (Jun 1, 2019)

I usually go every yr to see my brother&family at Thanksgiving for couple days but didn't last yr because of a sore knee.He was disappointed
I'll spend either Christmas Eve or Christmas afternoon with my close friends,rest of time I'm alone which I prefer


----------



## Falcon (Jun 1, 2019)

Rarely.  They all  live  nearby.


----------



## Ruth n Jersey (Jun 1, 2019)

No, my daughter has taken over Christmas because the Grand kids like to be home playing with their new toys so we stay with them. Thanksgiving is my holiday but what does make me sad is that each year there are fewer and fewer around the table. We weren't a big family to begin with so anyone not present is very noticeable and adds some sadness to the day. The other holidays are up for grabs and usually we are not alone. If it works out that we are I don't stress over it.


----------



## AZ Jim (Jun 1, 2019)

Since losing my wife, I will always be alone for holidays.


----------



## norman (Jun 1, 2019)

No, but I always become depressed on Thanksgiving and Christmas even when I am with my famiy.


----------



## Uptosnuff (Jun 1, 2019)

AZ Jim said:


> Since losing my wife, I will always be alone for holidays.



Yes, I thought about you when I was posting.  And how many others are out there in the same situation?


----------



## AZ Jim (Jun 1, 2019)

Uptosnuff said:


> Yes, I thought about you when I was posting.  And how many others are out there in the same situation?


Many. I'm sure.  Sad but true...


----------



## Keesha (Jun 1, 2019)

No.


----------



## Rosemarie (Jun 1, 2019)

I love living alone but I have to admit I miss spending Christmas with my family. All my family, siblings and children are now living in other countries. We keep in touch over the internet, but it's no substitute for actually being with them. Yes, I could spend Christmas with them, but I prefer to be in England at that time of the year.


----------



## Butterfly (Jun 2, 2019)

Sometimes I'm alone on holidays, but I don't stress about it.  Most of my family is either dead or on the other side of the country.


----------



## Marie5656 (Jun 2, 2019)

*Well, I will be having some family over for Thanksgiving.  Same guests I have had in the past.  Not sure what will happen for Christmas, I suppose my niece will invite me, but not sure if I want to travel if weather is not good.  New Years eve and day I will have no problem staying home.  That was our usual routine anyway. *


----------



## Ruthanne (Jun 3, 2019)

I am alone on all the holidays now.  Sometimes they have a get together here at the apt. place on July 4th weather permitting.  I'm  pretty used to being alone, have my little doggy and birdies to be with still.


----------



## Aunt Bea (Jun 3, 2019)

I don't mind being alone on holidays.

If it bothered me I would invite someone in for a drink or a meal take them out for a meal, etc...

Sometimes we need to make an effort to change/improve our own lives and not depend on others to do it for us.


----------



## JustBonee (Jun 4, 2019)

I've been alone on holidays, by choice,  and it never bothered me.   Being alone,  and being lonely are two very different things.
When I feel the need for company or a little livelier setting, especially on the holidays,   then I head over to my daughter's house (about a mile away) .... never a dull moment at their house with kids/dogs, etc.


----------



## DaveA (Jun 14, 2019)

Never have.  My wife and I do not have an extended family, only our own kids and their families.  We all live in southern New England and birthdays, graduations, marriages, etc., are shared by us all.  It's unlikely that either either my wife or I (now in our 80's) will find ourselves alone, as our kids include us in all of the family events. Even now, when night time driving is not possible for us, they always arrange among themselves,  to get "mom and dad" back home after dark or have us stay over for a couple of days at their homes.

We worked from the time the kids were born to form a closeknit family and evidently did some things right and now are enjoying the fruits of our labor.


----------



## oldman (Jun 15, 2019)

I feel all alone on Christmas because I have seasonal depression. Christmas in our home while I was growing up, was the most joyous times of my life while living with Mom and Dad. 

I have to go off by myself for about an hour and just meditate and think back of how it was back then. I even find myself talking to them. It’s a very sad day, but I have to put on a happy face, so I don’t ruin the day for my family. I think we have good Christmas’s now. At least, I never heard anyone complain. 

We had some Christmas’s back in the day that would make a good holiday movie. I would put my trains up at Christmas time on their own platform. It would take me a couple of days to get it all set-up with all the scenery items. My Dad played with the trains as much or maybe more than I did. And, our cat loved to cause train derailments.


----------



## debodun (Jul 13, 2019)

All holidays all the time. All my close relatives have passed and I only have a few cousins that don't speak to me. Usually doesn't bother me, but for some reason, Christmas 2017, I felt very melancholy.


----------



## Judycat (Jul 13, 2019)

I tend to miss bygone days and feel melancholy too even when I spend time somewhere for the holidays. I am glad when they are over.


----------



## gennie (Jul 16, 2019)

When I was younger and facing a solo holiday I would plan a trip ,to another area or even another country.  It was interesting to see how others celebrated certain holidays. 

I was visiting London on July 4th once and had fun explaining to a sort of dim person in our group why British banks were not closed on that day.  She was absolutely certain they would be.


----------



## squatting dog (Jul 18, 2019)

Only once. Christmas of 1971. Living alone in my 49 Pontiac hearse, parked behind a filling station with my hot plate plugged into the soda machine outlet so I could cook my oatmeal raisin Christmas supper. Was a mighty lonesome day. Later however, the Pontiac broke down and while at the junkyard hunting parts, I met the women of my dreams. 3 weeks later we wed.   
Now, 47 years later, still together..... what can I say? Life has it's bumps, but, it still goes on.


----------



## Uptosnuff (Jul 18, 2019)

I guess you just never know.


----------



## Liberty (Jul 20, 2019)

Love your blog stories, dog!


----------



## squatting dog (Jul 20, 2019)

Liberty said:


> Love your blog stories, dog!


Thank you kindly.


----------



## hypochondriac (Jul 20, 2019)

before marriage it was a lonely road for sure.


----------



## Fyrefox (Jul 21, 2019)

As someone childless not by choice, my holidays are always atypical events spent just with my significant other.  I have extended family over 200 miles away, but wouldn't fit in with them plus don't care to have my face rubbed in their wealth and accomplished children...


----------



## A2ZGrammie (Jul 22, 2019)

I'm never alone, but I hate holidays. I want them to be exactly the way they were when my kids were growing up. I want to eat the same food, decorate the tree the way I always did, have everything the same. I just about had a meltdown two years ago when we switched from a real tree to an artifical (even though the darn thing is so much easier.)

My youngest son tries really hard to spend time with me, or make sure there's someone here. My oldest son is in Iowa, and I never get to see him. Easter totally sucks. My middle son died right before it, and we drove home from the funeral on Easter sunday, so yeah, I hate Easter. I miss him on all the holidays. My oldest son's birthday is right at Thanksgiving, so that messes me up too.

I'm a big baby, and always want my way, so I spend the holidays being pretty unhappy. The 4th of July passed pretty much unnoticed around here. I don't like holidays, can you tell?


----------



## hypochondriac (Jul 22, 2019)

i cant afford to go on holidays anymore.


----------



## Marie5656 (Jul 22, 2019)

*A couple weeks back I talked with my cousins, who I always have had over for Thanksgiving. Told them that this year will be the last time I will be "doing" Thanksgiving. Just getting too hard, as I have been the only one doing all the cooking and cleanup (my husband and two male cousins, more interested in Football).  I had tried speaking up and asking for assistance, but best I got was one of the guys helping take the bird out of the oven.  
Of course, I was nice, and did not give this as a reason.  Just said that I wanted to maybe start going out for the day.  I feel no regrets.
)*


----------



## Bob19 (Jul 25, 2019)

AZ Jim said:


> Since losing my wife, I will always be alone for holidays.


Sorry to hear that. I too, am in your boat. I used to be a traveling musician, did well,lots of "Buddies".....all scattered to the wind now. I love life, but not everything about it, not at our age. Well, before I wear you out with my stuff, I'd like to hear from you and your thoughts, etc.


----------



## Uptosnuff (Jul 25, 2019)

A2ZGrammie said:


> I'm never alone, but I hate holidays. I want them to be exactly the way they were when my kids were growing up. I want to eat the same food, decorate the tree the way I always did, have everything the same. I just about had a meltdown two years ago when we switched from a real tree to an artifical (even though the darn thing is so much easier.)
> 
> My youngest son tries really hard to spend time with me, or make sure there's someone here. My oldest son is in Iowa, and I never get to see him. Easter totally sucks. My middle son died right before it, and we drove home from the funeral on Easter sunday, so yeah, I hate Easter. I miss him on all the holidays. My oldest son's birthday is right at Thanksgiving, so that messes me up too.
> 
> I'm a big baby, and always want my way, so I spend the holidays being pretty unhappy. The 4th of July passed pretty much unnoticed around here. I don't like holidays, can you tell?



Grammie,  very sorry to hear about your middle son.  I can't even imagine how it feels to lose a child.  I can totally understand your feelings about holidays.

At one time, I had a real tree but the straw that broke the camel's back was cleaning up all those needles.  I swore I wouldn't do that again and bought an artificial one.  I've never really missed the real one much.


----------



## A2ZGrammie (Jul 26, 2019)

Uptosnuff said:


> Grammie,  very sorry to hear about your middle son.  I can't even imagine how it feels to lose a child.  I can totally understand your feelings about holidays.
> 
> At one time, I had a real tree but the straw that broke the camel's back was cleaning up all those needles.  I swore I wouldn't do that again and bought an artificial one.  I've never really missed the real one much.


 
thank you, Uptosnuff. It's been horrible. He was a great guy. 

I hated those needles too. And my cat used to climb it. I have a great tip about cats though. They hate citrus! I laid some orange peel around the bottom of the tree, and she stayed away.

and I do miss my real tree. Terribly. I'm not really sure why. The artificial one is so much easier. I think it's because I'm a bohemian kinda gal.


----------

