# When to stop buying presents for grandchildren



## grannyjo

My grandchildren are now 21 and 20 years old.  

Both of them now earn far more from their job/part time job than I receive in aged pension.

I have only once received one combined present from them,  and that was when I turned 70,  after some nagging from their parents.

As they have became adults,  ie able to vote,  marry,  drive motor vehicles and everything else at age 18,  should I still send them birthday and Christmas presents?

I have done so up until now,  but I am questioning if I should continue.

At Christmas time,  I sent them each a card and some lottery tickets/scratchie type things.  I didn't even receive a phone call from them - in fact I never have - no matter what I have sent over the years.  They seemed to expect that I should send them the present,  and also phone them on the morning of their birthday.

We do live a fair distance from each other -  maybe a five hour drive.  They've never come to visit me by themselves,  only while accompanied by their parents,  even though they've passed through my town on their way on holidays.

Is it time for me to just say enough is enough?


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## BlunderWoman

Okay this is just me ...

A gift should be a joy for the giver as well as the gifted. If it's my joy to give something to someone I do it. I never do it because it's expected. That is what bill's are.
If what you are able to give without financial hardships is a card with a nice note..then to heck with em if they're so superficial they can't care about or understand your situation. If they are adults they are old  enough to know that the elderly live on a much tighter budget. Tell them IHOP gave you a break, why can't they. 
Old age should be able being happy the last years you can..you already probably spent it making other people happy. 

Ok that's just how I feel about the subject


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## Falcon

YES!  IMO.    They're not very thoughtful grandchildren.

Save your time & money for yourself.  Life's too short to worry about it.

Perhaps they'll learn some day, but don't hold your breath.  :love_heart:


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## RadishRose

If they are 21, never thank you and you are no longer comfortable giving them gifts (which I suspect you are not) stop.  , just my 2 cents


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## SeaBreeze

Sometimes when they reach adulthood, it's okay to just send a card instead of a gift.  I used to send my niece a birthday gift every year when she was young, but once she matured I just went to birthday and Christmas cards.  She was always thankful and sent me thank you cards with encouragement from my sister, but there comes a time when the gifts may not be that big of a deal.  I wouldn't overthink it, just stop the gifts and continue the well wishes with cards if you like, it probably doesn't make much of a difference to them.


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## Don M.

If they can't even make a phone call, perhaps it's time to just send a card, and nothing else.  

As our family has grown, buying gifts at Christmas was becoming in increasing hassle.  We hit on a good formula a few years ago...at one of the daughters suggestion.  Now, we all get together over Thanksgiving, and everyone writes down a gift choice on a slip of paper...with a $25 limit.  Then, we draw one name out of a hat, and buy One gift for the person we chose.  We also buy one guy or gal thing, and have a blind drawing for that gift.  Now, the only real gift shopping is for the little Great Grandkids, and the parents usually have a carload of toys to take home.  It's become a pretty good tradition that seems to work well for everyone.


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## fureverywhere

My oldest boy is thirty. From maybe seventeen the same favorite cologne for his birthday. Even his wife might not even know...but every birthday he knows Mom will get him a bottle. Something meaningful ya know?


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## Ken N Tx

6 children and 13 grand children...We stop/stopped at 16 years old..

What does bother me is when we have family get together/holidays a dish is expected from all..The adult Grand kids do not seem to get this!!!


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## Babsinbloom65

The simple answers to me of when to stop giving presents is: 1. When you feel you can't afford to do so anymore. 2. When you feel obligated to give a gift and aren't doing it simply because it makes you happy to do so. 3. When there is never a thank you or even and acknowledgement of the gift. and 4. When you can no longer think of anything to get them because they have everything all ready. 

My husband and I are going to have to make a decision about gift giving this year as now that we are semi-retired we don't have as much money to spend on gifts and we now have nine grandkids to buy for. The last few years when I asked them at Thanksgiving to make me a list of Christmas gifts they would like to receive so I would have something to pick from...they said they couldn't think of anything. That tells me it's time to stop the gift giving.


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## AprilSun

I would stop now that they're grown and it sounds like they don't appreciate it or at least they don't show it.  I've been thinking about stopping with the birthday presents at the age of 16 which will start soon. It is just my income and with what I can afford to give 6 times, you can't buy much. I have been just giving them money but that will have to stop eventually. For the last 2 Christmases, I have asked for a list and never received one from them or their mothers. Again, I gave them money which some are still at the age that they like getting money but when the enthusiasm stops, I will stop.


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## FazeFour

Grannyjo - I think it's fine if you stop sending birthday and Christmas gifts. You might, however, send an occasional no-occasion gift...if you see something affordable that you think a certain one might like, get it and send it with a "thought of you" note. Or send baked goods or handmade items out of the blue. I started doing this when 5 out of 8 grandchildren got busy with their lives, and I began living on a very small budget. I still give birthday and Christmas gifts to the 3 little ones.


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## Butterfly

RadishRose said:


> If they are 21, never thank you and you are no longer comfortable giving them gifts (which I suspect you are not) stop.  , just my 2 cents



I agree with Radish Rose. They are adults, and don't seem to appreciate your gifts.  Just stop.


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## grannyjo

I met with a friend this morning who has the same idea.

The grandchildren have grown into adults,  and no real communication from them.

I relented,  and sent the last of the "presents" I will send.

Just a card,  and a lottery ticket that might win him $2 million dollars.  (Lots of luck!)

He is now living with his girlfriend,  in a more or less "marriage" arrangement.

No real need for grandma to send anything more than good wishes.


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## nitelite

When they (and their parents) stop acknowledging the gift.


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## vickyNightowl

My kids received gifts from their paternal grandparents all the time,because they live in Greece and us here,whoever visited,they always sent something.I made sure,as soon as they were able to speak,that they. Thanked them every time.

It sickens me when grandparents are not appreciated,not just for gifts but for a lifetme of work to raise their kids.


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## Susie

My American grandchildren have snubbed me from day 1, don't know why.
Cards or presents have never been acknowledged.
It's sad, maybe I don't fit into their upper middle class scheme of things.
(but I've really tried, even offered to pay the fare to Australia).
So for me it's also: STOP!    :shucks:


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## Vee

Make it easy for them - just send them a text like everyone else. Then they can "reply all" with a "Thx". In fact, they might only have to type T - the rest might come up as predictive text.

And save your time and money for where it is appreciated.


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## IWMH

I give three grandkids $500.00 for Birthday and $500.00 at Christmas. They are in 23.,24.,27., respectively. When do I stop this outlandish gifts to each.


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## Aunt Marg

IWMH said:


> I give three grandkids $500.00 for Birthday and $500.00 at Christmas. They are in 23.,24.,27., respectively. When do I stop this outlandish gifts to each.


When grandpas wallet runs dry?


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## Buckeye

I have 2 adult grandsons - I gave them each $100 at birthday and Christmas this year. They either call or text a thank you.  They were raised right.  I do it because it gives me joy, and when that stops, I will stop.


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## hollydolly

IWMH said:


> I give three grandkids $500.00 for Birthday and $500.00 at Christmas. They are in 23.,24.,27., respectively. When do I stop this outlandish gifts to each.


if it had been me I would not be giving Grand-adults .. £3k a year. !!. for the exact reason that they're adults and no longer children... Once they became adults and were capable of earning their own money, then financial handouts from grandparents should end IMO


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## Kathleen’s Place

BlunderWoman said:


> Okay this is just me ...
> 
> A gift should be a joy for the giver as well as the gifted. If it's my joy to give something to someone I do it. I never do it because it's expected. That is what bill's are.
> If what you are able to give without financial hardships is a card with a nice note..then to heck with em if they're so superficial they can't care about or understand your situation. If they are adults they are old  enough to know that the elderly live on a much tighter budget. Tell them IHOP gave you a break, why can't they.
> Old age should be able being happy the last years you can..you already probably spent it making other people happy.
> 
> Ok that's just how I feel about the subject


Agree


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## Pecos

I stopped when they turned 30, but they are both underemployed right now so I have suspended that rule and sent them both nice checks. We are also able to spare the money even though both of us are retired and they need the help right now. 

They are pretty good about thanking us. I insist that none of them send us anything since we don't need anything and are busy downsizing.


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## Kathleen’s Place

We still give Christmas Presents to the older grands (19, 20, 20, 21). They all make more than we do too. But the gifts are smaller dollar wise than we give the 3 younger grandsons.  (A LOT SMALLER). They are all good kids and we will do it as long as we can. But I will say this...not sure we would if they treated us the way yours do you


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## Murrmurr

I'm close with my grandkids but I stopped buying them Christmas presents when they turned 18. And they still like me. But all the rest of the year, if I see something I know they'd like and I have the money, I buy it for them. Sometimes it's just a little something, sometimes it's kind of a big deal. They dig the random gifts as much as they did their Christmas gifts.


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## Sassycakes

*I have 3 grandchildren, my son's 2 boys are 24 and 23. They both are hard workers and both have girlfriends. I buy them gifts and their girlfriends too. My daughter's little girl just turned 10yrs old and I love buying things for her. They are all grateful and call to check on me and my hubby all the time. It makes me really happy to buy gifts for them.*


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## Kathleen’s Place

IWMH said:


> I give three grandkids $500.00 for Birthday and $500.00 at Christmas. They are in 23.,24.,27., respectively. When do I stop this outlandish gifts to each.


Whenever you want to!


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## Phoenix

I stopped buying presents when the people didn't care about what I got them.


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## Kathleen’s Place

Sassycakes said:


> *I have 3 grandchildren, my son's 2 boys are 24 and 23. They both are hard workers and both have girlfriends. I buy them gifts and their girlfriends too. My daughter's little girl just turned 10yrs old and I love buying things for her. They are all grateful and call to check on me and my hubby all the time. It makes me really happy to buy gifts for them.*


Our grandkids are like that too...very loving and good to us. If we couldn’t do it, it wouldn’t bother them a bit


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## Pappy

We have nine grandchildren and seventeen great grandkids. We stopped a long time ago....


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## Colleen

IWMH said:


> I give three grandkids $500.00 for Birthday and $500.00 at Christmas. They are in 23.,24.,27., respectively. When do I stop this outlandish gifts to each.


Immediately...if not sooner!!


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## Colleen

We don't have any grandchildren, but our combined "kids" ages are 51, 49, 45, and 44. These "kids" have never grown up and still expect gifts from us. I usually put $100/each in a card and that's it. This year, we're not getting together, especially since the 51 year old had tested positive for Covid from his job and he went back to work without another test. Don't want to be around any of them this year. 

I've decided to quit the "gift giving". We're 80 and 74 and I don't think it's necessary and we don't want anything from them, either. We buy what we want, when we want. If that makes me a Scrooge, so be it. We can use that money more than they can.


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## Wren

No acknowledgement or appreciation?  No gift, at any age


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## Kathleen’s Place

Pappy said:


> We have nine grandchildren and seventeen great grandkids. We stopped a long time ago....


Oh bless your hearts!  Lucky you


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## Ken N Tx

Pappy said:


> We have nine grandchildren and seventeen great grandkids. We stopped a long time ago....


We have 13 Grands and 2 Greats...We stopped  when the reached 16.


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## Pepper

I have one toddler grandchild and I'm an old grandma.  Don't think I'll make it to have this problem.  Just hangin' in.


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## Butterfly

grannyjo said:


> My grandchildren are now 21 and 20 years old.
> 
> Both of them now earn far more from their job/part time job than I receive in aged pension.
> 
> I have only once received one combined present from them,  and that was when I turned 70,  after some nagging from their parents.
> 
> As they have became adults,  ie able to vote,  marry,  drive motor vehicles and everything else at age 18,  should I still send them birthday and Christmas presents?
> 
> I have done so up until now,  but I am questioning if I should continue.
> 
> At Christmas time,  I sent them each a card and some lottery tickets/scratchie type things.  I didn't even receive a phone call from them - in fact I never have - no matter what I have sent over the years.  They seemed to expect that I should send them the present,  and also phone them on the morning of their birthday.
> 
> We do live a fair distance from each other -  maybe a five hour drive.  They've never come to visit me by themselves,  only while accompanied by their parents,  even though they've passed through my town on their way on holidays.
> 
> Is it time for me to just say enough is enough?


Yes, it is.


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## Kadee

I still buy / or give $ for the grandchildren aged 15 and 25  both the girls always thank us with a hug and a peck on the cheek ,however the younger girl only got a small amount of money this year because she asked for a new quilt and mattress underlay to go with her new bed 
the Quilt  and the underlay were close to $500


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## terry123

Send a card and thats it!!  All of mine love Amazon and they get $50.00 Amazon cards for Christmas.  I always get a call from them to thank me and I get a present from them.  When I stop getting a "thank you" I will stop getting them cards.


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## Jules

Later today I’ll send the grandkids a group text message wishing them a Merry Christmas. Since it’s a different time zone, it’s hard to co-ordinate talking. If they’re available, they’ll join it.  They’ve already received a financial gift.  It’s not huge but they appreciate it.  As long as one is getting it, they’ll all get it.  They were texting amongst themselves and thanking me.  I was hoping to get back to sleep at 5 a.m.


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## Brookswood

At 21 I would have killed for my own box of Nana’s homemade Christmas cookies.


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## Pepper

Brookswood said:


> At 21 I would have killed for my own box of Nana’s homemade Christmas cookies.


Wow!  What was in that stuff?


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## Lakeland living

If ignored, return the favor is my motto.


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## Rosemarie

Exchanging gifts at Christmas is the norm. If they don't care enough to buy you something, then don't buy them anything.


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## Brookswood

Pepper said:


> Wow!  What was in that stuff?


Butter, chocolate, some sugar, eggs, home made candied fruit, rum, etc. etc. etc.


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## nanieH

My grandchildren are 18, 21 & 22. I have never received a thankyou from them. When they were small, their parents thanked me. Now they are older, no one says thanks. I have decided this year I will send them each a nice card with a note telling them I have sent the amount I usually sent/spent on them to a children's charity. I know that gift will be appreciated.


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## Aunt Marg

nanieH said:


> My grandchildren are 18, 21 & 22. I have never received a thankyou from them. When they were small, their parents thanked me. Now they are older, no one says thanks. I have decided this year I will send them each a nice card with a note telling them I have sent the amount I usually sent/spent on them to a children's charity. I know that gift will be appreciated.


Good on you!

This generation has a whole lot of learning to do when it comes to respect.


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## Kathleen’s Place

Pepper said:


> Wow!  What was in that stuff?


I’ll bet a lot of love and memories were in those cookies


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## Kathleen’s Place

Aunt Marg said:


> Good on you!
> 
> This generation has a whole lot of learning to do when it comes to respect.


Luckily mine don’t, but I’ve read enough posts to agree with you Aunt Marge


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## Aunt Marg

Kathleen’s Place said:


> Luckily mine don’t, but I’ve read enough posts to agree with you Aunt Marge


So refreshing to hear that your grandchildren were raised well and with morals and standards, Kathleen.

Seems it's a passing quality these days.


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## charry

I buy for all the grandkids until they are 18 ( 15 of them )......
Then start buying for the great grandkids,
Not to say I don’t treat them, when they pop up to visit us , or go on holiday etc etc...


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## Sassycakes

*I was just thinking after reading this again. I have 3 grandchildren and I buy them gifts for every occasion. One is 24 one is 22 and one is 10 years old. I don't think I will ever stop. The 2 older ones have girlfriends and I buy gifts for them also. When I am buying the gifts I think of when I was young. My Mom's mother passed away when I was 5yrs old and my Dad's family hated my Mother so we never got a Christmas gift from her either. We would just sit there and watch her give all the other grandchildren gifts but not me or my sister. I would never want my grandchildren to go through that. In my eyes they are perfect and I get joy out of buying them gifts.*


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## Aneeda72

Sassycakes said:


> *I was just thinking after reading this again. I have 3 grandchildren and I buy them gifts for every occasion. One is 24 one is 22 and one is 10 years old. I don't think I will ever stop. The 2 older ones have girlfriends and I buy gifts for them also. When I am buying the gifts I think of when I was young. My Mom's mother passed away when I was 5yrs old and my Dad's family hated my Mother so we never got a Christmas gift from her either. We would just sit there and watch her give all the other grandchildren gifts but not me or my sister. I would never want my grandchildren to go through that. In my eyes they are perfect and I get joy out of buying them gifts.*


You are not alone in this.  My husband’s family never bought our kids anything.  My brother gave us 100 to spend on the kids every Christmas and made it clear that he resented doing so. His wife made him, he made that clear also.

First thing I did when I got a job, send him checks to pay him back.  He cashed the checks.  They were rich, but he cashed those checks.


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## OneEyedDiva

I'm just coming up on this situation. My son's 5 children have birthdays are coming up very soon and are within 3 weeks of each other.  The two oldest (31 & 26) have received the money from the trust accounts I opened for them, so I know they are not expecting anymore gifts from me. The middle son (23) doesn't know he's got trust money coming but no matter. Once they reach adulthood and/or start working, I do not feel obligated to give them gifts I will give birthday gifts to the two youngest, one will be 18 tomorrow, the other will be 16. I just bought cards for all my grandchildren. The three oldest will just get cards with loving notes. 

Due to the circumstances you described, I don't feel it's necessary for you to give them gifts.


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## Aneeda72

OneEyedDiva said:


> I'm just coming up on this situation. My son's 5 children have birthdays are coming up very soon and are within 3 weeks of each other.  The two oldest (31 & 26) have received the money from the trust accounts I opened for them, so I know they are not expecting anymore gifts from me. The middle son (23) doesn't know he's got trust money coming but no matter. Once they reach adulthood and/or start working, I do not feel obligated to give them gifts I will give birthday gifts to the two youngest, one will be 18 tomorrow, the other will be 16. I just bought cards for all my grandchildren. The three oldest will just get cards with loving notes.
> 
> Due to the circumstances you described, I don't feel it's necessary for you to give them gifts.


I send them all small gift cards, although they all have more money than we do (except the greats who are young). Who doesn’t like a gift card no matter how small, five dollars buys a drink or burger, makes the recipient feel special.


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## ronaldj

we have 12 and stopped getting toys around age 11. from then on cash that equals there age for birthdays. our oldest are turning 21 this year and it might be the end. for Christmas we get small gifts and 50 dollars each. my wife like to get a tree ornament that represents something in their life or what is going on that year.  on the other hand like Murrmurr said, sell a little something pick it up, take them out to supper now and again. they all come and visit and love to play games with us,  (card)  but with three turning 21 this year and 3 turning 19 and one just turned 17, they all have jobs and visits are a little less and less.


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## horseless carriage

This lovely dress my wife made for my niece's daughter, her first baby.
She's one year old and because of the pandemic we have only seen photos.

The little fellow that this was made for is the son of our God-son.
It's their first born too. He's another pandemic, photos only at present.


That God-son has a sister, our God-daughter, her two boys we saw as babies.
My wife has kept herself busy during the lockdown. The babies look fabulous.
I'll ask the parents permission and see if I can't post a photo of the babies posing.


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## PamfromTx

My husband and I are going to have to make a decision about gift giving.  We aren't making the money we once were while both were employed.  Sure, we have a savings, etc. but we don't touch that as we don't know when we'll be needing that.

We buy gifts for the great nephews, great nieces and of course, his grandson.  I sneak some inexpensive gifts to my sister.

Kindness and giving are life enhancing qualities that I've had for many years.  I've been this way since I was 17 ~ working a part-time job while a senior in high school.  

I don't think I can stop giving to the two youngest; they are so special to us.  Our recent high school graduate (great nephew) will be receiving some money from us to help him thru college and that will probably be his last 'gift' from us.   We still have his brother to gift ~ he's a senior in high school now.


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## Sliverfox

The checks we  wrote to my son  for gifts  for his daughters will probably stop.
Both girls are out of school & on their own.


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## DaveA

Don M. said:


> If they can't even make a phone call, perhaps it's time to just send a card, and nothing else.
> 
> As our family has grown, buying gifts at Christmas was becoming in increasing hassle.  We hit on a good formula a few years ago...at one of the daughters suggestion.  Now, we all get together over Thanksgiving, and everyone writes down a gift choice on a slip of paper...with a $25 limit.  Then, we draw one name out of a hat, and buy One gift for the person we chose.  We also buy one guy or gal thing, and have a blind drawing for that gift.  Now, the only real gift shopping is for the little Great Grandkids, and the parents usually have a carload of toys to take home.  It's become a pretty good tradition that seems to work well for everyone.


Very simple and very easy. We've been handling our Christmas gifts in a similar manner for years.

Entering the attitudes of the family members is a separate situation.  These kids and grandkids have been brought up and their attitudes have been formed by the older family members who preceded them.


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## fmdog44

IWMH said:


> I give three grandkids $500.00 for Birthday and $500.00 at Christmas. They are in 23.,24.,27., respectively. When do I stop this outlandish gifts to each.


And you get what from them? Dare I ask.


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## oldman

My wife still gives to the grandchildren even though I object to giving to the children that are older and earning a living. We still have two sixteen year olds, but the other three are doing well. I keep telling her that they will get theirs later after grandma and grandpa have gone, but she enjoys giving and believe me, they enjoy receiving.


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## Judycat

I really don't enjoy buying gifts and the thank you nowadays is sitting through watching the kid open his/her gifts or their mom doing so. If you don't attend the party, no thank you for you, because you really don't deserve one blah. Seriously.


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## fuzzybuddy

It all depends on the closeness of your relationships. Whatever feels good, and when you are financially capable of giving. But if you feel the need for a cut off age, you should make it known to your grandchildren, so they won't feel unwanted.
I remember when I aged out of getting grandparent presents-no more underwire three sizes too small.


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## Ruth n Jersey

My two grandsons are still very young. 11 and 13,so I give them gifts. My daughter picks out several choices of items they are interested in and I decide what I want to get for them.
They are very appreciative and thank me when they receive the gift and usually when we leave for home.
Depending on my financial situation I will continue to give them a gift. Hopefully they will have hobbies and interests that I can contribute a little something to.


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## SRB in CO

Ungrateful grandsons discussion here...............I have been very sad for so long, so letdown for so many years, feel I have been made a fool of.  I have been dealing with 4 of the most ungrateful Grandsons who have ever walked this earth.   They have never ever once said 'thank you' for presents.  I have bought them all many nice expensive gifts all their lives for Xmas and birthdays with no acknowledgement and never a simple 'Thank you".  They never told me they liked the things I got them, they unwrap their presents then leave the room, leaving those presents on the floor.  After age 13, I started sending them birthday cards and tucked in a $20 dollar bill and as usual they don't acknowledge it or say thank you.    I am not very well off, am on social security so my funds are very limited.  

The boys are now 22, 19, 16 and 15.  They never call, come over, wish me happy birthday, have never told me they love me, have never reached out to me, absolutely nothing!   I've helped 1 of them financially (at his mother's request) when he totaled his car and was saving for a new one.  I gave him $600 cash and again, no acknowledgement or verbal thank you.  So decided just today, I am a fool for carrying on this gift giving.  

They don't show any appreciation.  ......So......a big change will be happening this coming Xmas.  No more wasted money, I will not be buying them anything.  The older ones have girlfriends and 1 of the girl is pregnant with my first great grandbaby of which I spent well over $200 at a baby shower recently.  This is an unexpected surprise pregnancy and they are just starting out.  Neither my grandson nor his girlfriend thanked me!  Xmas 2021 will be more relaxing and different for me.  The boys might get a tin of cookies or chex mix! 

I'll actually have extra money to spend on my 2 youngest grand daughters ages 9 and 3 who absolutely are the sweetest of all, tell me all the time how much they love me.  I see them alot.  I babysit them 4 days a week.  They are the light of my life.


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## terry123

SRB in CO said:


> Ungrateful grandsons discussion here...............I have been very sad for so long, so letdown for so many years, feel I have been made a fool of.  I have been dealing with 4 of the most ungrateful Grandsons who have ever walked this earth.   They have never ever once said 'thank you' for presents.  I have bought them all many nice expensive gifts all their lives for Xmas and birthdays with no acknowledgement and never a simple 'Thank you".  They never told me they liked the things I got them, they unwrap their presents then leave the room, leaving those presents on the floor.  After age 13, I started sending them birthday cards and tucked in a $20 dollar bill and as usual they dont acknowledge it or say thank you.    I am not very well off, am on social security so my funds are very limited.  The boys are now 22, 19, 16 and 15.  They never call, come over, wish me happy birthday, have never told me they love me, have never reached out to me, absolutely nothing!   I've helped 1 of them financially (at his mother's request) when he totaled his car and was saving for a new one.  I gave him $600 cash and again, no acknowledgement or verbal thank you.  So decided just today, I am a fool for carrying on this gift giving.  They dont show any appreciation.  ......So......a big change will be happening this coming Xmas.  No more wasted money, I will not be buying them anything.  The older ones have girlfriends and 1 of the girl is pregnant with my first great grandbaby of which I spent well over $200 at a baby shower recently.  This is an unexpected surprise pregnancy and they are just starting out.  Neither my grandson nor his girlfriend thanked me!  Xmas 2021 will be more relaxing and different for me.  The boys might get a tin of cookies or chex mix!
> 
> 
> I'll actually have extra money to spend on my 2 youngest grand daughters ages 9 and 3 who absolutely are the sweetest of all, tell me all the time how much they love me.  I see them alot.  I babysit them 4 days a week.  They are the light of my life.


Very good plan.  I am doing the same here. One "grand" never thanks me for the gift cards I send but she uses them!.  I am going to send her a Christmas card this year but no gift card.  The others will get Amazon cards which they want and they always call to say thank you and tell me what they bought with them.


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## Giants fan1954

SRB in CO said:


> Ungrateful grandsons discussion here...............I have been very sad for so long, so letdown for so many years, feel I have been made a fool of.  I have been dealing with 4 of the most ungrateful Grandsons who have ever walked this earth.   They have never ever once said 'thank you' for presents.  I have bought them all many nice expensive gifts all their lives for Xmas and birthdays with no acknowledgement and never a simple 'Thank you".  They never told me they liked the things I got them, they unwrap their presents then leave the room, leaving those presents on the floor.  After age 13, I started sending them birthday cards and tucked in a $20 dollar bill and as usual they dont acknowledge it or say thank you.    I am not very well off, am on social security so my funds are very limited.  The boys are now 22, 19, 16 and 15.  They never call, come over, wish me happy birthday, have never told me they love me, have never reached out to me, absolutely nothing!   I've helped 1 of them financially (at his mother's request) when he totaled his car and was saving for a new one.  I gave him $600 cash and again, no acknowledgement or verbal thank you.  So decided just today, I am a fool for carrying on this gift giving.  They dont show any appreciation.  ......So......a big change will be happening this coming Xmas.  No more wasted money, I will not be buying them anything.  The older ones have girlfriends and 1 of the girl is pregnant with my first great grandbaby of which I spent well over $200 at a baby shower recently.  This is an unexpected surprise pregnancy and they are just starting out.  Neither my grandson nor his girlfriend thanked me!  Xmas 2021 will be more relaxing and different for me.  The boys might get a tin of cookies or chex mix!
> 
> 
> I'll actually have extra money to spend on my 2 youngest grand daughters ages 9 and 3 who absolutely are the sweetest of all, tell me all the time how much they love me.  I see them alot.  I babysit them 4 days a week.  They are the light of my life.


Same story, I have 2 totally ungrateful granddaughters,20 and 12.
Have never received a Thank you for gifts so stick a fork in me, I'm done!


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## Packerjohn

Don't start buying and then you wouldn't have to stop.  Nothing worse than some kid(s) with about 25 toys on the floor and just opening present after present and throwing them back on the floor.  I have seen it happen more than once.  What kind of values is he being taught?  There is something wrong with our society when people are maxed out on their credit cards by over spending at Christmas time.  People are important; not things.  Anyway, Santa is a myth used by stores and your credit card companies to stress you out by taking almost all of your money.   Yes, I have heard about the original St. Nick that lived in what is now Turkey during the 3rd or 4th century.  Sorry to have to tell you that the fat, jolly guy with the red suit and while beard was invented by the Coca Cola company.


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## jujube

As long as I'm a grandmother and great-grandmother, it'll be the 5th of Never before I stop the presents to my offspring.  They may be small presents, but there will be something from Meemaw.  That's what grandmas are for.....


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## Sassycakes

The only time I would stop buying presents for my grandchildren will be when I die.


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## Gary O'

When to stop buying presents for grandchildren

riiiight around the time they've outgrown their stocking stuffer harmonicas


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## Ladybj

When they turn 18.


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## LilliesGrand

Pappy said:


> We have nine grandchildren and seventeen great grandkids. We stopped a long time ago....


Same here....17 grandchildren and 6 great grandkids... can't afford it.


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## Alligatorob

grannyjo said:


> Is it time for me to just say enough is enough?


My vote is no, never give up on your grandkids.  

No need to spend much, the lotto tickets sound fine.  Just remind them you are thinking about them, maybe one day they will appreciate it more.  Even if they don't say so I bet they do appreciate it.


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