# To our children and grandchildren, "You have or had the opportunity to make us feel young or old"!



## grahamg (Aug 12, 2022)

My recollections fit in with the statement "Our children/grandchildren keep us young", (or feeling young again). 

However, I've no doubt many grandparents will say their grandchildren wear them out sometimes, thus making them feel their age too.

Those who do not  have contact with children/grandchildren obviously lose these benefits or "potential mixed benefits", but even when a child is wearing you out, and maybe you're moved to reprimand them a little, (in a kind way), then you're given the opportunity to show your commitment and love for them aren't you,........, some children even saying "they like it when they're being told off"!

Though not the theme of this thread it is true, or so I'm told, that in those Asian families where the elderly are revered, and all generations live together, that Alzheimers disease is unheard of, so you could say the elderly are kept young by their expose to the younger generations.

Now a thread of mine having anything to do with children/parents/grandparents wouldn't be complete without some reference to whether or not the fact children are told by those in authority, (and many many others), "that all that matters is their best interests" would be entitled to disregard whether seeing granny had any benefits to her due to the encounter, but if we're lucky our children/grandchildren will still instinctively acknowledge contact with those who love them, or have loved them, is a worthy thing to do!


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## Pepper (Aug 12, 2022)

You demand too much of others.  People don't give freely if they are demanded to do so.


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## grahamg (Aug 12, 2022)

Pepper said:


> You demand too much of others.  People don't give freely if they are demanded to do so.


I disagree, (I have that right dont I?)!


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## Pepper (Aug 12, 2022)

grahamg said:


> I disagree, (I have that right dont I?)!


Of course you do.


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## grahamg (Aug 12, 2022)

Pepper said:


> Of course you do.


That's good, (just checking!), you of course have the right to disagree with everything I say on this topic or any other, not least because I don't block forum members wishing to do so, "to blow my own trumpet for a moment"!


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## Pepper (Aug 13, 2022)

grahamg said:


> That's good, (just checking!), you of course have the right to disagree with everything I say on this topic or any other, not least because *I don't block forum members *wishing to do so, "to blow my own trumpet for a moment"!


FYI.  The only one with the power to block forum members is Matrix, not you.


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## grahamg (Aug 13, 2022)

Pepper said:


> FYI.  The only one with the power to block forum members is Matrix, not you.


There you go, I've just proved my point haven't I inadvertently, by discovering "you know the rule and I don't", (interesting, mmmm, two questions spring to mind, both I'd better not bother you with most likely).

Now, what was the thread topic you disagree with me over, of yes my stating " Kids/grandkids keep us young, wear us out, and whether they should spare a thought for granny, or grandpa"!


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## Pepper (Aug 13, 2022)

I answered you already.  I said "You demand too much of others. People don't give freely if they are demanded to do so."  Meaning................I'd love it if they should spare a thought for granny, or grandpa, but they can't be demanded or guilted into doing so, it must be given freely from the heart. One can't make anyone do it and if you try you'll push them away.  You already know that.  So do I. Experience can be a harsh teacher.


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## grahamg (Aug 13, 2022)

Pepper said:


> I answered you already.  I said "You demand too much of others. People don't give freely if they are demanded to do so."  Meaning................I'd love it if they should spare a thought for granny, or grandpa, but they can't be demanded or guilted into doing so, it must be given freely from the heart. One can't make anyone do it and if you try you'll push them away.  You already know that.  So do I. Experience can be a harsh teacher.


You dont consider there is another side to the one you're presenting is what you're saying here.

So you'd love it you say "If they should spare a thought for granny or grandpa".

My question in response to that attitude is what kind of society is created when no child is expected to show respect for those who ("more often than not") have loved them, whose lives meant they could be created, and what does it cost a child to be brought up to do this kind of thing, (I'd say it costs them nothing, and brings far more benefits than disadvantages, but even if it didn't "kith and kin" matters!).

So many things are demanded and a whole host of people play guilt games with our children's minds, (eating red meat being one thing my daughter was guilt tripped about, and she thought only fish and chicken was okay to eat, though luckily her mum didn't follow that particular trend, so it became a non-issue and when my mother prepared Sunday roast dinners, nothing was ever refused). However, you're characterising everything I'd describe as behaving decently toward those who have loved you in such a negative way I'd suggest you're almost a fanatic in the way you promulgate your opinions.

As we've agreed, we cant agree and are very willing to live with that situation, "so we'll move on shall we"(?)!


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## Sassycakes (Aug 26, 2022)

*My 12yr old granddaughter makes me feel both young and old. At her age, she is already smarter than me. She teaches me all about things, especially computer things. She amazes me. Today she heard me asking my daughter why she hasn't sent me a recent picture of herself. So I just got a picture of my daughter that my granddaughter took of my daughter today.*


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## Sassycakes (Aug 27, 2022)

Sassycakes said:


> *My 12yr old granddaughter makes me feel both young and old. At her age, she is already smarter than me. She teaches me all about things, especially computer things. She amazes me. Today she heard me asking my daughter why she hasn't sent me a recent picture of herself. So I just got a picture of my daughter that my granddaughter took of my daughter today.*
> View attachment 236369


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