# Have You Ever Had A One Way Relationship?



## Ruthanne (Jan 22, 2022)

*Please don't make me feel any stupider than I already feel with your replies but thanks in advance for them.*

Have you ever had a relationship with someone where you do all the giving and get virtually nothing in return?  I wasn't actually looking for much but friendship from this man.  All of our conversations revolved around him  and his health problems all the time.  We did go out to dinner twice and once he paid and once I did.  This friendship has been going on for about 5 years currently but I have known him for 50 years although we hadn't always been in contact.  

I have listened and listened and listened and given empathy and understanding and suggestions at times but he never listens to suggestions nor does he have any answers to his problems and just keeps on bitching and moaning.  I can hardly take listening anymore.  I guess I'm just fed up because it's the same old crap all the time and nothing else.  I have told him I can't listen to any more problems.  Thanks for listening to me vent.


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## hollydolly (Jan 22, 2022)

This guy is a Toxic friend, and I suspect you're holding onto him as a friend because you're lonely Ruthanne, 

You're not getting anything out of this relationship.. no fun, no joy... he just wants a sounding board ...

I think you should ease off talking to him .. you need people who uplift you in a relationship or friendship... not someone who drags you down.


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## oldpop (Jan 22, 2022)

I guess I have been on both sides of it. I have to be real careful about feeding into other peoples issues. I am a fixer and I do not like to leave anything broken. In the process of sincerely trying to help others I can drain my energy down to levels that can drag me down to places I have been and do not want to go again. The good thing is I know that about myself and can be on guard against letting it happen. It's not easy for me to do but I have to distance myself from such people/situations. I can and have been straight up honest with some people about it. Some have understood and some have not. Point is negativity is dangerous to me and I mean literally so I have to deal with it head on when it arises in my life. Like most things it is an ongoing learning process. Life can be a selfish process but that does not mean I have to step on others to reach my goals.


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## Aunt Bea (Jan 22, 2022)

Yup!

_“Don’t be silly. Loving is easy. It’s finding someone to love you back that’s hard.” - _Sabrina Jeffries


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## Ruthanne (Jan 22, 2022)

hollydolly said:


> This guy is a Toxic friend, and I suspect you're holding onto him as a friend because you're lonely Ruthanne,
> 
> You're not getting anything out of this relationship.. no fun, no joy... he just wants a sounding board ...
> 
> I think you should ease off talking to him .. you need people who uplift you in a relationship or friendship... not someone who drags you down.


I agree, I don't care to keep it going.  Too much of a downer for me.  I've told him he can text me but I don't want to speak.  He doesn't like texting so he doesn't much.  He left a message on my phone answering and I did not call him back.  I do need some uplifting and not so much negativity.  Thanks.


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## Ruthanne (Jan 22, 2022)

oldpop said:


> I guess I have been on both sides of it. I have to be real careful about feeding into other peoples issues. I am a fixer and I do not like to leave anything broken. In the process of sincerely trying to help others I can drain my energy down to levels that can drag me down to places I have been and do not want to go again. The good thing is I know that about myself and can be on guard against letting it happen. It's not easy for me to do but I have to distance myself from such people/situations. I can and have been straight up honest with some people about it. Some have understood and some have not. Point is negativity is dangerous to me and I mean literally so I have to deal with it head on when it arises in my life. Like most things it is an ongoing learning process. Life can be a selfish process but that does not mean I have to step on others to reach my goals.


Yes, being honest is the best thing.


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## Ruthanne (Jan 22, 2022)

Aunt Bea said:


> Yup!
> 
> _“Don’t be silly. Loving is easy. It’s finding someone to love you back that’s hard.” - _Sabrina Jeffries


I guess we've all been there at times.


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## Lara (Jan 22, 2022)

1. A relationship of one is not a relationship. It's all about him.

2. There are "vampires" in the world who will suck the joy out of you.
I'm sure he's a nice man, just with self-absorbed issues, but you get my drift

3. You're doing the right thing to distance yourself. It's time for some "You"
because "You is kind, you is smart, you is important" (from "The Help")... Hugs


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## Wren (Jan 22, 2022)

Maybe when younger but I wouldn’t bother with anybody like that, I can see how draining it would be, sounds like you’ve  been more than patient  Ruthanne, what’s in it for you ? 

I would continue to distance myself, you deserve better x


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## Ruthanne (Jan 22, 2022)

Wren said:


> Maybe when younger but I wouldn’t bother with anybody like that, I can see how draining it would be, sounds like you’ve  been more than patient  Ruthanne, what’s in it for you ?
> 
> I would continue to distance myself, you deserve better x


I did question what's in this for me and that's why I told him what I did.  I do think this can happen at any age.


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## Alligatorob (Jan 22, 2022)

Ruthanne said:


> Have You Ever Had A One Way Relationship?


I think we all have, and from your posts it sounds like you are doing the right thing about it.  Doesn't mean you have to end the relationship, just cut it back to something you can get some enjoyment out of.  If that's not possible you might have to end it.  Only you will know.

Advice on these things is much more easily given than followed, I understand that.  I do think you are seeing things pretty clearly and will be fine.  Hope so anyway!


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## Ruthanne (Jan 22, 2022)

Alligatorob said:


> I think we all have, and from your posts it sounds like you are doing the right thing about it.  Doesn't mean you have to end the relationship, just cut it back to something you can get some enjoyment out of.  If that's not possible you might have to end it.  Only you will know.
> 
> Advice on these things is much more easily given than followed, I understand that.  I do think you are seeing things pretty clearly and will be fine.  Hope so anyway!


Thanks, I see you understand where I'm coming from and it's most appreciated


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## jujube (Jan 22, 2022)

This isn't a friend, it's an emotional vacuum  cleaner.  You've done what you can for him.......time to pull the plug.


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## Ruthanne (Jan 22, 2022)

jujube said:


> This isn't a friend, it's an emotional vacuum  cleaner.  You've done what you can for him.......time to pull the plug.


Well it has gone on a very long time and I guess I mistook that for friendship.


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## Paco Dennis (Jan 22, 2022)




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## officerripley (Jan 22, 2022)

What's hard about ending this kind of relationship is if they're family members, especially elderly parents that you're taking care of; then you're stuck in it, trust me.


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## Ruthanne (Jan 22, 2022)

officerripley said:


> What's hard about ending this kind of relationship is if they're family members, especially elderly parents that you're taking care of; then you're stuck in it, trust me.


I understand.  He's not family.


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## fuzzybuddy (Jan 22, 2022)

I don't know how much of a Sad Sack this guy is. But being self- absorbed, asking for guidance and never taking advice is pretty much your average human being. To me, it sounds as though you want more from this relationship than this guy can deliver. Probably limiting your time with him is the best thing you can do for yourself.


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## dobielvr (Jan 22, 2022)

Sounds like you've had enough.

You won't be able to grow if you keep staying there...


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## Serenity4321 (Jan 22, 2022)

Ruthanne said:


> *Please don't make me feel any stupider than I already feel with your replies but thanks in advance for them.*
> 
> Have you ever had a relationship with someone where you do all the giving and get virtually nothing in return?  I wasn't actually looking for much but friendship from this man.  All of our conversations revolved around him  and his health problems all the time.  We did go out to dinner twice and once he paid and once I did.  This friendship has been going on for about 5 years currently but I have known him for 50 years although we hadn't always been in contact.
> 
> I have listened and listened and listened and given empathy and understanding and suggestions at times but he never listens to suggestions nor does he have any answers to his problems and just keeps on bitching and moaning.  I can hardly take listening anymore.  I guess I'm just fed up because it's the same old crap all the time and nothing else.  I have told him I can't listen to any more problems.  Thanks for listening to me vent.


Ruth ..no need to fell stupid..you are obviously a very caring, loving, empathetic person and that is a good thing. But you also might want to take care of yourself...I am curious. Have you ever told him what you told us?? He sounds pretty self-centered but perhaps it is worth trying to explain how you feel ..unless you already have and he did not comprehend or want to listen to how his behavior was affecting you. Still..I wonder how he would react. It might make a difference in the friendship if that is what you still want.


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## Alligatorob (Jan 22, 2022)

Ruthanne said:


> Please don't make me feel any stupider than I already feel


You ain't stupid, in fact you seem just the opposite.  Recognizing things for what they are is good.


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## Nathan (Jan 22, 2022)

Ruthanne said:


> Well it has gone on a very long time and I guess I mistook that for friendship.


It can be difficult to assess and manage a friendship so as to maintain one that's balanced.  Checking one's own needs and motivation for a friendship seems to be a full time job; evaluating the "friend" and their frame of mind is _hit & miss_, unless that friend also is putting the necessary work into _friendship maintenance_.


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## Jeni (Jan 22, 2022)

Nathan said:


> It can be difficult to assess and manage a friendship so as to maintain one that's balanced.  Checking one's own needs and motivation for a friendship seems to be a full time job; evaluating the "friend" and their frame of mind is _hit & miss_, unless that friend also is putting the necessary work into _friendship maintenance_.


I really like the term "friendship maintenance" 

I have also gotten sucked in to this before ... 
I now assess each friendship........ as i have grown tired of being the giver all the time ... 
i used to think "be nice ...they are going through something "
but  i would get to vent/ discuss my things the next time but the NEXT time never comes... make the break 

It  is stressful to make the break .... and sometimes when i am wanting a friend to chat with.... i almost fall back into the pattern and call my Toxic friend.


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## Pinky (Jan 22, 2022)

Sounds like my 2nd marriage. It gets tiring after awhile. I hope you can make the break, as it takes its toll .. and it sounds like it already has. I've been through this with former female friends as well. Sometimes, you need to just walk away, for the sake of your own sanity.


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## Lavinia (Jan 22, 2022)

It's surprising how many people are totally wrapped up in themselves, and see everything in relation to them. Being in a relationship with such a person is a complete waste of your energy and time.
I like the music of the BeeGees, but if you listen to the words of some of their songs, they do reflect that sort of one-way relationship...one giving and the other taking.


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## MickaC (Jan 24, 2022)

Ruthanne said:


> *Please don't make me feel any stupider than I already feel with your replies but thanks in advance for them.*
> 
> Have you ever had a relationship with someone where you do all the giving and get virtually nothing in return?  I wasn't actually looking for much but friendship from this man.  All of our conversations revolved around him  and his health problems all the time.  We did go out to dinner twice and once he paid and once I did.  This friendship has been going on for about 5 years currently but I have known him for 50 years although we hadn't always been in contact.
> 
> I have listened and listened and listened and given empathy and understanding and suggestions at times but he never listens to suggestions nor does he have any answers to his problems and just keeps on bitching and moaning.  I can hardly take listening anymore.  I guess I'm just fed up because it's the same old crap all the time and nothing else.  I have told him I can't listen to any more problems.  Thanks for listening to me vent.


I'm so sorry you're having to deal with this.
One way relationships are very sad and heart breaking.
Sounds like you put a lot of yourself into this relationship for so long, i admire you for that, and sadly he's so much into himself, he doesn't appreciate your tremendous giving.
I won't give out advice, one way or the other.
I hope you can do what is the best for you, and only you. I know this is very draining for you.

Don't mean to take away from your thread.....i was with a sociopath type person, for 28 years.....my self worth was totally stripped.

Sociopath.......one that has no guilt....no remorse.....no regret.....they are into themselves only.

TAKE CARE Ruthanne.
I hope your situation becomes in your favour.


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## caroln (Jan 24, 2022)

Yes.  I had a friend since (I kid you not) 1969.  She was always a little controlling but other qualities made up for that.  We eventually moved far away from each other but remained phone friends.  In the last 10 years she's become completely obsesses with talking about nothing besides her husband's health issues and I've had to steel myself for her weekly updates.  She would tell me _when_ she was going to call next and boy, I'd better be there to get the call or I get an earful the next time I talked to her.  The phone calls lasted about an hour every time, informing me of every detail of his progress and how she took charge of his medications, etc. and was so much smarter than the doctors and nurses about most things.

I just couldn't take it anymore and told her I needed to cut down on the length of our phone calls and she got so p**sed off, she started saying unpleasant and sarcastic things, so I hung up on her.  She tried calling back and I just never answered the phone again.  It's been 5 years now and she's tried calling once, and again, I just didn't answer.  I really don't want to start the whole process over again.  Life's too short.


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## chrislind2 (Jan 24, 2022)

Every relationship I had was a one-way relationship. Bad luck or fate, it's hard to figure out why. 
It's often hard to tell your story because people can't relate, and it seems to them unlikely somehow. My "love life" is something I could write a book about, but there is always someone who had it worse, I know. Made so many mistakes before I eventually got married. And that turned out to be the biggest mistake of all. Having 2 daughters and 2 grandchildren are the best things that came out of that whole mess. Over all the years the only thing you end up with is it all had to be my fault. I picked the wrong person, I did or said the wrong things. When I look back it just confuses me more. You see other people all around you with failing marriages and relationships, so it seems my life is not abnormal. I raised my 2 daughters myself after the divorce and did not have the time or made the time to date for a long time. When I finally did date, once, it was the same thing I had been going though for 22 years. After my daughters were grown and gone, I found out I enjoyed living alone and left the horrors of the relationship world behind. I could also write a book about how some people can be happy and thrive on their own.


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## MickaC (Jan 24, 2022)

Ruthanne said:


> *Please don't make me feel any stupider than I already feel with your replies but thanks in advance for them.*
> 
> Have you ever had a relationship with someone where you do all the giving and get virtually nothing in return?  I wasn't actually looking for much but friendship from this man.  All of our conversations revolved around him  and his health problems all the time.  We did go out to dinner twice and once he paid and once I did.  This friendship has been going on for about 5 years currently but I have known him for 50 years although we hadn't always been in contact.
> 
> I have listened and listened and listened and given empathy and understanding and suggestions at times but he never listens to suggestions nor does he have any answers to his problems and just keeps on bitching and moaning.  I can hardly take listening anymore.  I guess I'm just fed up because it's the same old crap all the time and nothing else.  I have told him I can't listen to any more problems.  Thanks for listening to me vent.


Ruthanne.......please don't feel stupid......you are not.


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## fatboy (Jan 24, 2022)

my first marriage,im sure she thought the same thing


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## Gaer (Jan 24, 2022)

Ruthanne, Someday, probably out of the blue, You will meet someone who penetrates YOUR SOUL!  
He's out there and waiting for you!
and,
It will be MAGICAL!  You will be blown away!  be open to all possibilities!

What is your description of the perfect man?  Why don't you describe him right here, right now?
I'm SERIOUS!  Boldness has power and magic in it!
Don't waste another night on that other man.  When you find you would rather be alone than with him, 
something is wrong!


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## Shero (Jan 24, 2022)

Maybe I had too  much to eat for brunch, but,  I did not get the impression Ruthanne was talking about a lover relationship. I thought it was only a long time friend.

Anyway, my two francs worth would be to ditch him. Personally, I cannot stand negative people and he would have been long gone as a friend.

Tell me your troubles once
Tell me twice
I help you find a solution if you wish
But tell me again and you are shown the door!
,


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## Ladybj (Jan 24, 2022)

You are not stupid at all.. we live, we learn and we move on.  A lot of times people have repressed emotions and let them out at any given time.. especially the older in age they get.


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## caroln (Jan 25, 2022)

Ladybj said:


> You are not stupid at all.. we live, we learn and we move on.  A lot of times people have repressed emotions and *let them out at any given time*.. especially the older in age they get.


Yes, that would be me.


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## Chet (Jan 25, 2022)

Most guys don’t ask a girl out on a date because he likes her personality. It’s something else they are after. That has been the history of my love life more or less. That can’t help but lead to a one way relationship and many girls know that. The guy buys gifts, wines and dines and is permanently on the entertainment committee. When he finds one that will do things for him is when he has found a keeper. I wish I was so lucky.


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## IFortuna (Jan 25, 2022)

Ruthanne said:


> *Please don't make me feel any stupider than I already feel with your replies but thanks in advance for them.*
> 
> Have you ever had a relationship with someone where you do all the giving and get virtually nothing in return?  I wasn't actually looking for much but friendship from this man.  All of our conversations revolved around him  and his health problems all the time.  We did go out to dinner twice and once he paid and once I did.  This friendship has been going on for about 5 years currently but I have known him for 50 years although we hadn't always been in contact.
> 
> I have listened and listened and listened and given empathy and understanding and suggestions at times but he never listens to suggestions nor does he have any answers to his problems and just keeps on bitching and moaning.  I can hardly take listening anymore.  I guess I'm just fed up because it's the same old crap all the time and nothing else.  I have told him I can't listen to any more problems.  Thanks for listening to me vent.


Can't believe you put up with the narcissist  this long.  Don't sell yourself short. There are some beautiful great men out there. Don't waste you time on anyone who is so self centered. You deserve better.


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## IFortuna (Jan 25, 2022)

Chet said:


> Most guys don’t ask a girl out on a date because he likes her personality. It’s something else they are after. That has been the history of my love life more or less. That can’t help but lead to a one way relationship and many girls know that. The guy buys gifts, wines and dines and is permanently on the entertainment committee. When he finds one that will do things for him is when he has found a keeper. I wish I was so lucky.


Hello.


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## IFortuna (Jan 25, 2022)

Aunt Bea said:


> Yup!
> 
> _“Don’t be silly. Loving is easy. It’s finding someone to love you back that’s hard.” - _Sabrina Jeffries


Send out your love.  Keep it up until it sticks.  It will.
Send your love into the future
Send your precious love into some distant time
And fix that wounded planet with the love of your healing
Send your love
Send your love--Sting


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## IFortuna (Jan 25, 2022)

caroln said:


> Yes.  I had a friend since (I kid you not) 1969.  She was always a little controlling but other qualities made up for that.  We eventually moved far away from each other but remained phone friends.  In the last 10 years she's become completely obsesses with talking about nothing besides her husband's health issues and I've had to steel myself for her weekly updates.  She would tell me _when_ she was going to call next and boy, I'd better be there to get the call or I get an earful the next time I talked to her.  The phone calls lasted about an hour every time, informing me of every detail of his progress and how she took charge of his medications, etc. and was so much smarter than the doctors and nurses about most things.
> 
> I just couldn't take it anymore and told her I needed to cut down on the length of our phone calls and she got so p**sed off, she started saying unpleasant and sarcastic things, so I hung up on her.  She tried calling back and I just never answered the phone again.  It's been 5 years now and she's tried calling once, and again, I just didn't answer.  I really don't want to start the whole process over again.  Life's too short.





Gaer said:


> Ruthanne, Someday, probably out of the blue, You will meet someone who penetrates YOUR SOUL!
> He's out there and waiting for you!
> and,
> It will be MAGICAL!  You will be blown away!  be open to all possibilities!
> ...


audaces fortuna juvat  Fortune Favors the Bold


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## IFortuna (Jan 25, 2022)

Chet said:


> Most guys don’t ask a girl out on a date because he likes her personality. It’s something else they are after. That has been the history of my love life more or less. That can’t help but lead to a one way relationship and many girls know that. The guy buys gifts, wines and dines and is permanently on the entertainment committee. When he finds one that will do things for him is when he has found a keeper. I wish I was so lucky.





Chet said:


> Most guys don’t ask a girl out on a date because he likes her personality. It’s something else they are after. That has been the history of my love life more or less. That can’t help but lead to a one way relationship and many girls know that. The guy buys gifts, wines and dines and is permanently on the entertainment committee. When he finds one that will do things for him is when he has found a keeper. I wish I was so lucky.


Gosh Chet,  not all guys are looking for that one thing only.  Some men/women need a connection and closeness with a person before that ensues.  It is less about sex and more about something else.


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## Nathan (Jan 25, 2022)

> she's become completely obsesses with talking about nothing besides her husband's health issues


Several gal friends/acquaintances from the fitness center are always complaining about their husbands lack of fitness consciousness, and related health issues where they are the care-giver.   I get that, am in the same position with my DW.   
I wonder if some people who are giving are subconsciously drawn to those who are needy.   ?


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## Sachet (Jan 25, 2022)

White knight syndrome. Fixers.


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## IFortuna (Jan 25, 2022)

Sachet said:


> White knight syndrome. Fixers.


Love to see any knight these days.  There are few and a lot of them are in dangerous professions just as in the days of Knights and the Holy Grail.


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## Autumn72 (Feb 2, 2022)

Nathan said:


> It can be difficult to assess and manage a friendship so as to maintain one that's balanced.  Checking one's own needs and motivation for a friendship seems to be a full time job; evaluating the "friend" and their frame of mind is _hit & miss_, unless that friend also is putting the necessary work into _friendship maintenance_.


Send him all the replies just maybe he will LEARN HOW TO GIVE BACK TO ANOTHER
IN THE HOW IT WORKS UNLESS HE IS trying to get rid of you meaning trying to use you for his emotional mummy bag to give him the supply of constant comfort for his injured self-esteem 
He needs to know that a date for dinner can pay back for his greedy selfish desires that he must payback or go stand in the corner until he behaves in a genuinely happy hour to YOU.
Send him this information


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## Autumn72 (Feb 2, 2022)

chrislind2 said:


> Every relationship I had was a one-way relationship. Bad luck or fate, it's hard to figure out why.
> It's often hard to tell your story because people can't relate, and it seems to them unlikely somehow. My "love life" is something I could write a book about, but there is always someone who had it worse, I know. Made so many mistakes before I eventually got married. And that turned out to be the biggest mistake of all. Having 2 daughters and 2 grandchildren are the best things that came out of that whole mess. Over all the years the only thing you end up with is it all had to be my fault. I picked the wrong person, I did or said the wrong things. When I look back it just confuses me more. You see other people all around you with failing marriages and relationships, so it seems my life is not abnormal. I raised my 2 daughters myself after the divorce and did not have the time or made the time to date for a long time. When I finally did date, once, it was the same thing I had been going though for 22 years. After my daughters were grown and gone, I found out I enjoyed living alone and left the horrors of the relationship world behind. I could also write a book about how some people can be happy and thrive on their own.


Oh, my you sound like a copy of me.
I hope you pm me asap.
A book is exactly what my mother said to me That I could write.
She never seemed to be therr for me  since she was booked up with sisters and brother oh he ran away......yikes there is a book for sure. I am happy that I read your post for its been a narrow road for me to continue onward alone without the comfort of a human heart around. 7 years is a long road to travel too long.
Not, for anything, except your warmth.


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## horseless carriage (Feb 2, 2022)

Ruthanne said:


> I do need some uplifting and not so much negativity.  Thanks.


You've found it. Your friends here will offer support and sympathy. Believe me, that's a start. This, so called friend, is the problem not the solution. You don't have to let go, but if you don't make the first contact, the text message, the e-mail and (guess whose showing his age?) the letter and he doesn't respond, then simply let him go. If he misses you enough, you can be sure he will pester you until you respond. But, and sadly I think it will be so, if he ignores you, well at least you know where you stand. 

You rock dear lady, now all you have to, is find that someone special that appreciates you.


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## chrislind2 (Feb 11, 2022)




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## Jan14 (Feb 18, 2022)

Some of us seem to get ourselves stuck in these type relationships.  Me for one.  I’ve come to learn there is a beginning and end to most friendships.  Very few are forever.


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## Ruthanne (Feb 18, 2022)

Jan14 said:


> Some of us seem to get ourselves stuck in these type relationships.  Me for one.  I’ve come to learn there is a beginning and end to most friendships.  Very few are forever.


I hear ya.  I have since blocked this guy as he keeps trying to contact me.  I've had enough.


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## Autumn72 (Mar 7, 2022)

Wren said:


> Maybe when younger but I wouldn’t bother with anybody like that, I can see how draining it would be, sounds like you’ve  been more than patient  Ruthanne, what’s in it for you ?
> 
> I would continue to distance myself, you deserve better x


She desires a replacement 
Where do you go for replacements wish there was a department for that
Big business in that for sure. These dating sites do not care enough to grow this well needed item which would make a lot of people happier. Yet we sit on our bums N feel lost for some are human beings that need to give love and receive it by one's that took a class in how to love. How about  this type of business that was in England long ago. 
Searching not online dating disaster women I read were being raped in their own places.


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## Autumn72 (Mar 7, 2022)

Ruthanne said:


> *Please don't make me feel any stupider than I already feel with your replies but thanks in advance for them.*
> 
> Have you ever had a relationship with someone where you do all the giving and get virtually nothing in return?  I wasn't actually looking for much but friendship from this man.  All of our conversations revolved around him  and his health problems all the time.  We did go out to dinner twice and once he paid and once I did.  This friendship has been going on for about 5 years currently but I have known him for 50 years although we hadn't always been in contact.
> 
> I have listened and listened and listened and given empathy and understanding and suggestions at times but he never listens to suggestions nor does he have any answers to his problems and just keeps on bitching and moaning.  I can hardly take listening anymore.  I guess I'm just fed up because it's the same old crap all the time and nothing else.  I have told him I can't listen to any more problems.  Thanks for listening to me vent.


Yes I have and feel bad about it.
It hurts deeply. Seems all my relationships were that way.
Very sad way to deal with the outcome. 
Could have left a lot sooner.
With children it's sad.


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## sandymooneyb (Mar 7, 2022)

Ruthanne said:


> *Please don't make me feel any stupider than I already feel with your replies but thanks in advance for them.*
> 
> Have you ever had a relationship with someone where you do all the giving and get virtually nothing in return?  I wasn't actually looking for much but friendship from this man.  All of our conversations revolved around him  and his health problems all the time.  We did go out to dinner twice and once he paid and once I did.  This friendship has been going on for about 5 years currently but I have known him for 50 years although we hadn't always been in contact.
> 
> I have listened and listened and listened and given empathy and understanding and suggestions at times but he never listens to suggestions nor does he have any answers to his problems and just keeps on bitching and moaning.  I can hardly take listening anymore.  I guess I'm just fed up because it's the same old crap all the time and nothing else.  I have told him I can't listen to any more problems.  Thanks for listening to me vent.


You deserve a man friend who cares about you and not all about him.


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## Autumn72 (Mar 7, 2022)

Cheating drugs betrayal of my sisters


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## sandymooneyb (Mar 7, 2022)

Aunt Bea said:


> Yup!
> 
> _“Don’t be silly. Loving is easy. It’s finding someone to love you back that’s hard.” - _Sabrina Jeffries


Yes! I agree!


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## sandymooneyb (Mar 7, 2022)

sandymooneyb said:


> You deserve a man friend who cares about you and not all about him.


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