# What do you think about a big gap in age when comes in dating.



## Robert59 (Aug 19, 2021)

Woman wants to date me but her age is 27 and I'm 61. She is a nurse at a health clinic. She does have 4 children she said.


----------



## hollydolly (Aug 19, 2021)

I thought you already had a girlfriend ?


----------



## Robert59 (Aug 19, 2021)

hollydolly said:


> I thought you already had a girlfriend ?


Now it's more of a friend because she wants to move in with her sister in another state. Her sister wants to take care of her many health problems she has.


----------



## hollydolly (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> Now it's more of a friend because she wants to move in with her sister in another state. Her sister wants to take care of her many health problems she has.


oh well you're a free man to do as you wish now...  . Age gap is one thing..such a big age gap rarely works,  but I would be more especially wary of anyone that young with 4 kids... .


----------



## Robert59 (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> Now it's more of a friend because she wants to move in with her sister in another state. Her sister wants to take care of her many health problems she has.


I need a break from her everyday bi-polar problem. Now this lady nurse is telling me she well take care of me. I don't really need four children to deal with either.


----------



## hollydolly (Aug 19, 2021)

Well there's probably no harm in going on a couple of dates if that's what you wish, but I would be concerned  that a 27 year old with 4 kids is looking for a sugar Daddy...


----------



## terry123 (Aug 19, 2021)

hollydolly said:


> Well there's probably no harm in going on a couple of dates if that's what you wish, but I would be concerned  that a 27 year old with 4 kids is looking for a sugar Daddy...


I would think that also.


----------



## Robert59 (Aug 19, 2021)

hollydolly said:


> Well there's probably no harm in going on a couple of dates if that's what you wish, but I would be concerned  that a 27 year old with 4 kids is looking for a sugar Daddy...


I think she like me because I never been married and have no children. She said her past marriage was real bad. She has long blonde hair that is 3 foot long and has big blue eyes.

I will listen too everyone on here about her wanting a sugar Daddy. She only knows me for two days and told me she love's me. I would think it's hard for a woman with four kids to find another man to marry?


----------



## Lee (Aug 19, 2021)

Be careful Robert, be very careful. She has known you for 48 hours and she loves you? She is up to something, count on it.


----------



## hollydolly (Aug 19, 2021)

Lee said:


> Be careful Robert, be very careful. She has known you for 48 hours and she loves you? She is up to something, count on it.


Oh good lord,  if what Robert says is true...I absolutely agree.. ..start running, and do not look back Robert... this woman sounds like a Bunny boiler....


----------



## Robert59 (Aug 19, 2021)

hollydolly said:


> Oh good lord,  if Robert says is true...I absolutely agree.. ..start running, and do not look back Robert... this woman sounds like a Bunny boiler....


What's a bunny boiler?


----------



## horseless carriage (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> What's a bunny boiler?


It's slang. for a person, esp a woman, who is considered to be emotionally unstable and likely to be dangerously vengeful.
The term originated from a scene in the 1987 film Fatal Attraction where a scorned woman (played by Glenn Close), seeking revenge on her ex-lover (played by Michael Douglas), places his family's beloved pet rabbit in a pot of boiling water when he is away from the house.


----------



## hollydolly (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> What's a bunny boiler?


yes it generally means someone who comes onto you too strong and too fast, and usually once you get involved with them, they take everything from you including your friends.. and make your life a misery, unless you concentrate only on them


----------



## Jennina (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> She only knows me for two days and told me she love's me. I


Super mega red flag.  Seniors already have a lot of body aches, you might be in for a heartache. 

If you're the type of person who falls in love fast, don't even date her cos she will tell you what you want to hear. 

If you can keep your feelings in check, go ahead and date her. You got yourself a free nurse. 

My gut feel tho is don't pursue it.


----------



## Wren (Aug 19, 2021)




----------



## hollydolly (Aug 19, 2021)

Jennina said:


> Super mega red flag.  Seniors already have a lot of body aches, you might be in for a heartache.
> 
> If you're the type of person who falls in love fast, don't even date her cos she will tell you what you want to hear.
> 
> ...


lol...a Free nurse with 4 kids to look after...perhaps she's looking for a free home,  a free babysitter, and a free wallet...


----------



## Jennina (Aug 19, 2021)

hollydolly said:


> lol...a Free nurse with 4 kids to look after...perhaps she's looking for a free home,  a free babysitter, and a free wallet...


Omg you're right.   I forgot about he kids.


----------



## Alligatorob (Aug 19, 2021)

The others are probably right, but it might be fun for a little while... that long blond hair and those blue eyes sound nice.

Just be careful.


----------



## Judycat (Aug 19, 2021)

...or Robert might be the Harrison Ford of Senior Forums and just a really nice man who doesn't forget what you said a minute after talking to you.


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

I’ve often heard this said over the years, “IF SOMETHING SEEMS JUST TOO GOOD TO BE TRUE, THAT MAY JUST BE THE CASE!” I’ve also heard it said that, “Fools rush in, where angels fear to tread.” I’m not calling you a fool but if in your own heart you aren’t sure, maybe your friends here are giving you sound advice. I can hear what they’re saying and I don’t even have a horse in the race! A fool and his money are soon parted. Again, not meaning you but those sayings stick around for a reason, I’d think.


----------



## Alligatorob (Aug 19, 2021)

Chris P Bacon said:


> those sayings stick around for a reason


Yes, but there are also: "_Strike while the iron is hot_", "_Time and tide wait for no man_", and "_There is no time like the present_".  

Looking back in life I regret the missed opportunities more than the mistakes I have made.

Just be careful, if you do it go in with eyes wide open.  Let us now how it all works out!


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

Alligatorob said:


> Yes, but there are also: "_Strike while the iron is hot_", "_Time and tide wait for no man_", and "_There is no time like the present_".
> 
> Looking back in life I regret the missed opportunities more than the mistakes I have made.
> 
> Just be careful, if you do it go in with eyes wide open.  Let us now how it all works out!


Quite true but I stand by my “where angels fear to tread” quote. And isn’t there something about “A true gentleman doesn’t kiss and tell”? So, Robert59, if you’re a true gentleman, keep the details to yourself. Both for yours and the young lady’s sake as well.

Living well causes fewer regrets, IMHO.


----------



## Tom 86 (Aug 19, 2021)

I'm an older man 86.  I agree with what ALL these women are saying here.  Run for the hills.  She is up to something.  I've had your problem a few years ago.  All she wanted was my money & a free place to stay, then run around all night.


----------



## Chet (Aug 19, 2021)

If you don't feel old now, you will after you date her. In my forties, I dated a girl in her twenties. Just sitting next to her and comparing the skin on both our arms, I could see the age difference. Look at the skin on your arms.

Also, any increase in blood in the male member comes from the brain.


----------



## Ronni (Aug 19, 2021)

As a general statement I have no issues with age gaps in rerelationships, no matter the size of the gap. The caveat to that though is that one remain realistic.

The greater likelihood in relationships with very large age gaps, is that the younger person is looking for something other than a love match. It might be security, a roof over their head, financial gain, the wherewithal to get their kids taken care of etc. 

As long as that’s known and addressed and measures taken to protect the older person’s assets, and all those cards are on the table, then I see little harm.

Most folks though won’t be that realistic.


----------



## Alligatorob (Aug 19, 2021)

Ronni said:


> looking for something other than a love match


I think to some degree that is true of all relationships.  Sometimes its subconscious, but its always there.  Though I do agree it is likely more so with the big age difference.  Her declaring love after just 2 days would worry me more than the age difference.

Robert, only you can know what is best for you.  Listen to the advice here, but make your own decision.  Whatever it is I hope it works out for the best!


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

Alligatorob said:


> I think to some degree that is true of all relationships.  Sometimes its subconscious, but its always there.  Though I do agree it is likely more so with the big age difference.  Her declaring love after just 2 days would worry me more than the age difference.
> 
> Robert, only you can know what is best for you.  Listen to the advice here, but make your own decision.  Whatever it is I hope it works out for the best!


 Why is it that being in or falling in love "takes time"? Whereas hating someone can happen before one can even blink their eyes? There must be some good reasoning behind this but does time really matter in such things or are we fooling ourselves?


----------



## horseless carriage (Aug 19, 2021)

When Joan Collins married a man 32 years her junior, some were inevitably concerned that she might not last the pace. However, the actress laughed off the age difference between her and fifth husband Percy Gibson, quipping: 'If he dies, he dies.'


----------



## charry (Aug 19, 2021)

It’s not bad for a guy to be older,  but I think it’s a bit Pervy  for a young boy with @n older woman,  maybe it’s because I have 4 sons .....
..My husband is 13 yrs older than me 
My eldest son, has just re Married again , and the age gap is 22years...


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

Elizabeth Taylor married younger too, I believe but I could be mistaken. 

As a younger man, I was always attracted to "older" women. Call it the Mrs Robinson Effect, maybe. But these days I prefer women near my own age, either younger or older, no matter. I don't think I could keep up with a 27 year old at this point and I wouldn't want the responsibility of caring for a 90+ year old woman either at this point. But if that's what blows someone else's skirt up, then I salute you. It just would sink, rather than float, my own boat I'd say.


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

charry said:


> It’s not bad for a guy to be older,  but I think it’s a bit Pervy  for a young boy with @n older woman,  maybe it’s because I have 4 sons .....
> ..My husband is 13 yrs older than me
> My eldest son, has just re Married again , and the age gap is 22years...


Age is just a number and an attitude, to a point, I feel. But tell me this, if you would, how old would you say you were if you had no idea how old you are? And the people around you, how about their ages as well? I think that we all mature at different rates but it's our sense of values and morals that is a better determiner of relationship steadiness.


----------



## charry (Aug 19, 2021)

Chris P Bacon said:


> Age is just a number and an attitude, to a point, I feel. But tell me this, if you would, how old would you say you were if you had no idea how old you are? And the people around you, how about their ages as well? I think that we all mature at different rates but it's our sense of values and morals that is a better determiner of relationship steadiness.


I’m just me ,   I guess ......I’ve always been quite mature , stubborn , reckless sometimes..
Polite, but still have the same standards ......
So I feel no different really from aged 20 to now ......66.......


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

charry said:


> I’m just me ,   I guess ......I’ve always been quite mature , stubborn , reckless sometimes..
> Polite, but still have the same standards ......
> So I feel no different really from aged 20 to now ......66.......


I feel, I think, the same. My heart tells me I'm 20 something but my body tells me not to listen to my heart!


----------



## win231 (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> Woman wants to date me but her age is 27 and I'm 61. She is a nurse at a health clinic. She does have 4 children she said.


Make sure your pen has lots of ink.
You'll be writing lots of checks.


----------



## win231 (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> I think she like me because I never been married and have no children. She said her past marriage was real bad. She has long blonde hair that is 3 foot long and has big blue eyes.
> 
> I will listen too everyone on here about her wanting a sugar Daddy. She only knows me for two days and told me she love's me. I would think it's hard for a woman with four kids to find another man to marry?


It's often hard for a woman with ONE kid to find a man to marry.


----------



## Oris Borloff (Aug 19, 2021)

win231 said:


> Make sure your pen has lots of ink.
> You'll be writing lots of checks.


At first I thought that was a euphemism...


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

Oris Borloff said:


> At first I thought that was a euphemism...


Shouldn't they wait until they're married for those? And keep them quiet too, so the neighbors won't hear?


----------



## jujube (Aug 19, 2021)

If you need to ask advice from us, I'm pretty sure you already know in your heart what you should do......


----------



## feywon (Aug 19, 2021)

Like Ronni i have no issue in general with age gaps  either.  My last husband was 19 yrs my junior. Despite  how that went, the problems were not age related. And i wouldn't just on the basis of age advise anyone to pursue or decline the opportunity to 'date' someone. 
In this case the more relevant issues in the info you've presented us with are the red flags:

Her 'pursuing' you, instead of flirting and getting you to do the asking first. If she's consciously running a long con--she's not very bright about it. Some people do it unconsciously, because of their own issues/needs. 

Her telling you about her bad marriage and 4 kids before you've even expressed an interest in dating her? Unless she told you this cause you asked to know more about her, this could be a play for sympathy, to appear 'vulnerable'. Especially if you met where she works. The info about the kids should have come out in a natural way when a date was getting scheduled. ie "I have to find a sitter." Which opens the door for you ask 'how many, how old?'. 

Years ago there was a Pop psychology concept, which had some merit: The 'Dance Away Lover'. This is the person who not only tells you they love you quickly, in the first days, weeks, months (however long it takes for you to believe it and emotionally invest in relationship with them) they think everything about you is 'perfect', they bend over backward to agree with and accommodate you. Once you invest/commit to relationship---suddenly they find fault with traits they found endearing initially. This is not the normal healthy openness about things that annoy one from the get go but we overlook till we realize we may have to live with certain habits the rest of our lives. This is a tactic that is never deployed till the pursued party is 'hooked'. The fault-finding puts the target on the defensive, and in many cases makes them afraid they'll 'lose' the pursuer. This is why they wait till you've expressed your strong feelings in return, because otherwise you might decide they are not worth the effort. 

i hope you'll take everyone's comments under advisement, even if you're 'looking' for female companionship and that's been complicated by the Pandemic. 

Somebody says they 'love' me that soon, before an actual 'date' even --- my response would be "You don't know me near well enough to love me, so what you love is an idea of me you have. When i don't fit the idea well enough---you'll be mad at me not yourself. So, no thanks!"


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

feywon said:


> Like Ronni i have no issue in general with age gaps  either.  My last husband was 19 yrs my junior. Despite  how that went, the problems were not age related. And i wouldn't just on the basis of age advise anyone to pursue or decline the opportunity to 'date' someone.
> In this case the more relevant issues in the info you've presented us with are the red flags:
> 
> Her 'pursuing' you, instead of flirting and getting you to do the asking first. If she's consciously running a long con--she's not very bright about it. Some people do it unconsciously, because of their own issues/needs.
> ...


I was stationed in the Philippines for several years while in the Navy years ago. If only I had a nickel for everytime I heard those bar girls say, "GI Joe, c'mere, me go with you! Me love you long time! I love you, no sh*t!" Oh, thanks for the memories!


----------



## Kaila (Aug 19, 2021)

Hi, Robert.

The age gap is not as important, as that she tells you she loves you, after less than a week.
And she's also decided so quickly, that she could take care of you, and her 4 children, so fast as well?
Those things make no sense, does it?

Getting involved with someone who is telling you irrational things, is not a good idea.

She could leave you just as fast as she came, for someone else, or for any other reason she gets on any day.

She could also do many other awful things that you don't expect, because
_you don't know her, either.

That's why people date for some time, before they talk about love or moving in, especially if there are children involved.

Do you know anyone else who knows her and about her?
I am worried she would likely do things that are bad for you, if you let her decide such major changes in your life now._


----------



## MarciKS (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> Woman wants to date me but her age is 27 and I'm 61. She is a nurse at a health clinic. She does have 4 children she said.


I think you know the answer or you wouldn't be here asking the question.


----------



## charry (Aug 19, 2021)

Chris P Bacon said:


> I feel, I think, the same. My heart tells me I'm 20 something but my body tells me not to listen to my heart!


And you still have a lovely/smile , and pearly teeth Chris .....


----------



## Gaer (Aug 19, 2021)

I've known a lot of young women who wanted a man, ANY MAN, to TAKE CARE OF THEM. 
Dating younger or older is no problem at all!  Go for it!
But, if this lady has four children, and is in love with you without knowing anything about you
I'd be dubious.
I think these guys are right.  I don't think you want to live the rest of your life with problems, responsibilities and disharmony.
BIG RED FLAG!


----------



## Jules (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> She only knows me for two days and told me she love's me.



She doesn’t even know you after two days.  If you own a nice house and have money, she knows what to expect.


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

charry said:


> And you still have a lovely/smile , and pearly teeth Chris .....


@charry Be still my beating !  
Yes, image is an important thing for a snake oil salesman. Even in retirement!  
PS Thanks so much, oink!


----------



## Della (Aug 19, 2021)

Chris P Bacon said:


> I was stationed in the Philippines for several years while in the Navy years ago. If only I had a nickel for everytime I heard those bar girls say, "GI Joe, c'mere, me go with you! Me love you long time! I love you, no sh*t!" Oh, thanks for the memories!


My husband was in Thailand but he  remembers it shorter and more  straightforward, "Hey GI!  You buy me BX!"


----------



## fmdog44 (Aug 19, 2021)

caveat emptor


----------



## charry (Aug 19, 2021)

Chris P Bacon said:


> @charry Be still my beating !
> Yes, image is an important thing for a snake oil salesman. Even in retirement!
> PS Thanks so much, oink!


Lol your very welcome Hun ....


----------



## charry (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> I think she like me because I never been married and have no children. She said her past marriage was real bad. She has long blonde hair that is 3 foot long and has big blue eyes.
> 
> I will listen too everyone on here about her wanting a sugar Daddy. She only knows me for two days and told me she love's me. I would think it's hard for a woman with four kids to find another man to marry?


Go for it Robert ,!   Don’t listen to anyone , but your heart.....
Life’s to short.........Good luck ..........


----------



## Gaer (Aug 19, 2021)

I wanted to play the song, "Come a little bit closer" by Jay and the Americans 1964
But my computer is goofing up and I couldn't play it here.  
Just seemed appropriate!


----------



## Gaer (Aug 19, 2021)

charry said:


> Go for it Robert ,!   Don’t listen to anyone , but your heart.....
> Life’s to short.........Good luck ..........


You know what?  I didn't take into account if you had FEELINGS for her.  Charry's right IF you are IN LOVE! 
And
There are other ways to have intimacy!  Touching, caressing, kissing, 
You KNOW all this!  Your mind and heart already KNOW!


----------



## feywon (Aug 19, 2021)

Gaer said:


> I wanted to play the song, "Come a little bit closer" by Jay and the Americans 1964
> But my computer is goofing up and I couldn't play it here.
> Just seemed appropriate!


Here you go:


----------



## charry (Aug 19, 2021)

Gaer said:


> I wanted to play the song, "Come a little bit closer" by Jay and the Americans 1964
> But my computer is goofing up and I couldn't play it here.
> Just seemed appropriate!


There you go gaer.........


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

People helping people, working together for the good of someone needing help, now that's what I call GOOD NEWS!


----------



## Gaer (Aug 19, 2021)

charry said:


> There you go gaer.........


Thanks, but that's not "Come a little bit closer"
Sweet of you though!


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

Gaer said:


> Thanks, but that's not "Come a little bit closer"
> Sweet of you though!


Yeah, it's the thought that counts and you're a good sport for recognizing her for that. The Jay And The Americans was good!


----------



## charry (Aug 19, 2021)

Gaer said:


> Thanks, but that's not "Come a little bit closer"
> Sweet of you though!


What is it then ? And I will put it on for you


----------



## charry (Aug 19, 2021)

Chris P Bacon said:


> People helping people, working together for the good of someone needing help, now that's what I call GOOD NEWS!


I’m a carer Chris....so I  care and help.....


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

I am too, charry! And I belive that post #54 is what she was looking for. The one right before yours.


----------



## feywon (Aug 19, 2021)

Chris P Bacon said:


> Why is it that being in or falling in love "takes time"? Whereas hating someone can happen before one can even blink their eyes? There must be some good reasoning behind this but does time really matter in such things or are we fooling ourselves?


IMO, neither comes that quick, although we certainly can have fairly quick attractions to and strong dislikes for people. Thing is many people are very lazy about their words---both 'love' and 'hate' are thrown around way to easy and quickly. i say again, more than once i've butted heads with someone on first encounter, but we both made an effort to talk thru it and settled into a mutual respect and sometimes friendship. i don't even use 'hate' about my exes and #3. (i tend to hate certain behaviors but still be able to see the good or neutral qualities the same person is capable of as well.)

And it isn't just about 'time', it's about the effort the two put into relationship building. Some relationships that begin based on immediate attraction do well, even if they don't last 'till death do them part', because the people involved still put effort into the relationship. We're seeing more younger couples all the time who manage to 'co-parent' successfully post going their separate ways. Trust takes time and a variety of life experiences to build, and it's the hardest thing to get back once broken/betrayed. That's the problem with 'instant' love you don't know enough about each other yet. If you 'hate' quickly at worst you might be depriving yourself of getting to know someone you could benefit from knowing. But if you love and trust too quickly--the worst case scenario could be serious emotional damage to you, your children even the other person. 

We have to remember that marrying for romantic 'love' is a fairly recent development in human relationships. My Hungarian Grandmother was pushed into a marriage with a 20 something when she was just 14. Luckily for her he had approached her family because he was head over heels for her. She ruled their roost, and he stayed in love with her despite not being blind to her flaws judging from things he told one my Aunties.   In some countries arranged marriages are still fairly common. From what i've read, some of them 'come to an understanding' and keep up appearances, some actually come to love each other deeply over time.


----------



## win231 (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> I can't have sex because of Diabetes and my blood pressure in the past been 239/100 so this will not work anyway. She will end up killing me. My medical record doesn't say anything I have found.


She doesn't care about sex.  She'll be getting that from her younger boyfriend.
She won't kill you.  Her other younger boyfriend will kill you - with her help.  Then they'll both share whatever you had.


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

feywon said:


> IMO, neither comes that quick, although we certainly can have fairly quick attractions to and strong dislikes for people. Thing is many people are very lazy about their words---both 'love' and 'hate' are thrown around way to easy and quickly. i say again, more than once i've butted heads with someone on first encounter, but we both made an effort to talk thru it and settled into a mutual respect and sometimes friendship. i don't even use 'hate' about my exes and #3. (i tend to hate certain behaviors but still be able to see the good or neutral qualities the same person is capable of as well.)
> 
> And it isn't just about 'time', it's about the effort the two put into relationship building. Some relationships that begin based on immediate attraction do well, even if they don't last 'till death do them part', because the people involved still put effort into the relationship. We're seeing more younger couples all the time who manage to 'co-parent' successfully post going their separate ways. Trust takes time and a variety of life experiences to build, and it's the hardest thing to get back once broken/betrayed. That's the problem with 'instant' love you don't know enough about each other yet. If you 'hate' quickly at worst you might be depriving yourself of getting to know someone you could benefit from knowing. But if you love and trust too quickly--the worst case scenario could be serious emotional damage to you, your children even the other person.
> 
> We have to remember that marrying for romantic 'love' is a fairly recent development in human relationships. My Hungarian Grandmother was pushed into a marriage with a 20 something when she was just 14. Luckily for her he had approached her family because he was head over heels for her. She ruled their roost, and he stayed in love with her despite not being blind to her flaws judging from things he told one my Aunties.   In some countries arranged marriages are still fairly common. From what i've read, some of them 'come to an understanding' and keep up appearances, some actually come to love each other deeply over time.


Thanks, feywon but I wasn't speaking literally. Please don't hate me cuz' I love you!


----------



## Kaila (Aug 19, 2021)

@Robert59
She's a nurse and a person.  She knows you can't have sex, and that is likely why she has chosen you.  She knows that she wouldn't have to do that with you.
I agree with the post above, that figures she'd get the sex from somebody else, while living with you and her children with you.

She doesn't know you , Robert, as a person or individual, so that isn't love.

I dont think Robert loves her, either, btw.
He doesn't know her at all, either!
Just that she is understandably lovely to look at.

She could be big trouble, he'd regret ever letting her move in.

Living alone is much better, than living with someone worse, and harder to live with, than your previous, former girlfriend, Robert.


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert, before you invest much in her, you might want to invest in a vasectomy for you. Child support payments aren't something I'd relish in these golden years. If it were me, I'd not tell her that I'd had one either. She's already proven her fertility by birthing four kids. Up to you whatever choice you make but a vasectomy is a LOT cheaper than years of child support! Maybe you two could be on the Maury Povich show though if she did get pregnant while you're together. Free DNA testing!


----------



## Nathan (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> Woman wants to date me but her age is 27 and I'm 61. She is a nurse at a health clinic. She does have 4 children she said.


It's your call but since you asked:   I wouldn't if I were you.   Ask yourself- "why"...money, security for her and her children?
If I were single I wouldn't date a lady that was more than 10 years younger.    My two business partners are younger women(54, 57); we are strictly friends but I can see that their worlds are sufficiently different, such that our 12 to 15 year age difference would be an issue, if in a relationship.


----------



## Nathan (Aug 19, 2021)

Kaila said:


> @Robert59
> She's a nurse and a person.  She knows you can't have sex, and that is likely why she has chosen you.


Sorry, I may have missed something...I don't see that Robert said he was unable to have sex, he's only 61.


----------



## Kaila (Aug 19, 2021)

Nathan said:


> Sorry, I may have missed something...I don't see that Robert said he was unable to have sex, he's only 61.


He has other health problems, and said it in post # 47 on this thread.


----------



## PamfromTx (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> Woman wants to date me but her age is 27 and I'm 61. She is a nurse at a health clinic. She does have 4 children she said.


Oh dear, I hope she doesn't get pregnant again.


----------



## Kaila (Aug 19, 2021)

PamfromTx said:


> I hope she doesn't get pregnant again.


Yes, from someone other than Robert.

But wait, we don't know; she might already be!

I don't think he knows enough about this person, to get involved quickly!


----------



## Robert59 (Aug 19, 2021)

Kaila said:


> He has other health problems, and said it in post # 47 on this thread.





PamfromTx said:


> Oh dear, I hope she doesn't get pregnant again.


If she moved in with me she would have saved 18,000 a year on rent.


----------



## Kaila (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> I she moved in with me she would have saved 18,000 a year on rent.


Yes, I am sorry Robert,
you *are* a very nice person,

But in this situation, I think  what she loves *is that* she would save all that rent money, not really loves you.


----------



## PamfromTx (Aug 19, 2021)

Kaila said:


> Yes, from someone other than Robert.
> 
> But wait, we don't know; she might already be!
> 
> I don't think he knows enough about this person, to get involved quickly!


I agree.


----------



## Mr. Ed (Aug 19, 2021)

Just think   you can start a family and fill in for the kids missing dad? And in return well, there is no guarantee that your young partner/wife will stick around when things change in her favor.


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

Maybe he could hire her as a nurse then but even with health issues, I think I could figure out a way to have sex. It might not be the traditional ways but I've a good imagination and I can improvise when I find it necessary to do so. I kind of hope he tries it on for size so I can see what his experience is. Maybe it'll be a wonderful thing then again it could end up a train wreck. Either way though it'll be his to own. Life is like a coin, you can spend it on anything you want to but you only get to spend it once.


----------



## Murrmurr (Aug 19, 2021)

Chris P Bacon said:


> Why is it that being in or falling in love "takes time"? Whereas hating someone can happen before one can even blink their eyes? There must be some good reasoning behind this but does time really matter in such things or are we fooling ourselves?


Maybe because long blond hair and blue eyes delays ones better judgement.


----------



## senior chef (Aug 19, 2021)

I totally agree with those who say "watch out. Big trouble on the way"  The age difference is one problem to overcome BUT that business of her saying she loves you AFTER ONLY 48 HOURS IS A HUGE RED FLAG. 

Once many years ago, I met a woman for the 1st time over coffee. By the time I got home she had left a message on my machine saying she wanted to move in with me.  I dropped her like a hot potato. No question about it, she had some serious emotional problem. And IMO, so does this lady of yours.

If I may make a suggestion ? Think with the big head, not the little one.


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

Murrmurr said:


> Maybe because long blond hair and blue eyes delays ones better judgement.


Very true but it also changes which brain is driving that car. Hair doesn't have to be long either. Any port in a storm!


----------



## Murrmurr (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> I can't have sex because of Diabetes and my blood pressure in the past been 239/100 so this will not work anyway. She will end up killing me. My medical record doesn't say anything I have found.


I was all for you giving it a go for a while, but that could be a deal breaker for her. You should tell her you can't have sex....see if she falls out of love as quickly as she fell in.


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

senior chef said:


> I totally agree with those who say "watch out. Big trouble on the way"  The age difference is one problem to overcome BUT that business of her saying she loves you AFTER ONLY 48 HOURS IS A HUGE RED FLAG.
> 
> Once many years ago, I met a woman for the 1st time over coffee. By the time I got home she had left a message on my machine saying she wanted to move in with me.  I dropped her like a hot potato. No question about it, she had some serious emotional problem. And IMO, so does this lady of yours.
> 
> If I may make a suggestion ? Think with the big head, not the little one.


How many hours does it take to feel love and express your feelings to someone, in your opinion? And "I don't know" isn't an answer. 49? 50? 100?  1000?


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> I can't have sex because of Diabetes and my blood pressure in the past been 239/100 so this will not work anyway. She will end up killing me. My medical record doesn't say anything I have found.


All the better that you *hire* her as a nurse then with a proper contract. That way if she kills you, you can sue. You'll have recourse!


----------



## Nathan (Aug 19, 2021)

Kaila said:


> He has other health problems, and said it in post # 47 on this thread.


Ah, I must be getting old, did'nt see those 40+ posts.


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

Murrmurr said:


> I was all for you giving it a go for a while, but that could be a deal breaker for her. You should tell her you can't have sex....see if she falls out of love as quickly as she fell in.


He can't but she can and just might. But it's not my pinata. You all can hit it all you want!


----------



## Llynn (Aug 19, 2021)

Why on earth would you want another woman in your life? If companionship is what you want......get a dog.


Chris P Bacon said:


> I was stationed in the Philippines for several years while in the Navy years ago. If only I had a nickel for everytime I heard those bar girls say, "GI Joe, c'mere, me go with you! Me love you long time! I love you, no sh*t!" Oh, thanks for the memories!


I remember the Subic Bay love call: "Psst, Psst, hey sailor you take me US, OK?"


----------



## Murrmurr (Aug 19, 2021)

Chris P Bacon said:


> He can't but she can and just might. But it's not my pinata. You all can hit it all you want!


4 kids at age 27 tells me she enjoys sex, and she's very careless. I'll add selfish.
I'd pass on hittin' that pinata.


----------



## Robert59 (Aug 19, 2021)

I think this is more about saving 18,000 a year on rent. Here in the place I live someone moves in they have rights to stay the police has told me. It takes a judge to remove them. Police said they can stay just hours too make them a *tenant*


----------



## Murrmurr (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> I think this is more about saving 18,000 a year on rent. Here in the place I live someone moves in they have rights to stay the police has told me. It takes a judge to remove them.


Yep, and who do you think the cops would ask to leave, you or a mother and her 4 kids? And a judge might agree.


----------



## Gaer (Aug 19, 2021)

Kaila said:


> @Robert59
> She's a nurse and a person.  She knows you can't have sex, and that is likely why she has chosen you.  She knows that she wouldn't have to do that with you.
> I agree with the post above, that figures she'd get the sex from somebody else, while living with you and her children with you.
> 
> ...


I'm a little taken back about "Wouldn't have to do that with you".
I don't understand.  Isn't sex a highly desirable action?  Shouldn't it be wonderful for both parties?
A man/woman relationship, before getting too involved, should be exciting, magical, thrilling, blissful.  
If it isn't that, it's not worth getting involved!  Mediocrity has no place in a relationship.
Without affection and intimacy, wouldn't it be like a Brother/Sister relationship?
Robert, All your posts tell me you've already made up your mind.  Pay attention to your inner feelings.


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

Murrmurr said:


> 4 kids at age 27 tells me she enjoys sex, and she's very careless. I'll add selfish.
> I'd pass on hittin' that pinata.


4 kids from how many daddy's I wonder? And do those daddy's take the children for visits?


----------



## Murrmurr (Aug 19, 2021)

Chris P Bacon said:


> 4 kids from how many daddy's I wonder? And do those daddy's take the children for visits?


Or does _he_ visit them?....for weeks at a time.


----------



## senior chef (Aug 19, 2021)

Chris P Bacon said:


> How many hours does it take to feel love and express your feelings to someone, in your opinion? And "I don't know" isn't an answer. 49? 50? 100?  1000?


A person, any person, male or female, develops true love over a period of time.  It is impossible to really know someone in 48 hours. Emotionally mature people, give the matter a great deal of thought before "falling in love".  Falling in "like" is one thing. Falling in "horney" is quite common.  BUT, no psychologist would ever give a specific number of hours to "falling in love". 

Before I fell in love, serious love, I'd need to know about the interests of the woman. Hobbies etc. Also, the number of hours she worked/week. Her politics. Is she willing to negotiate on vital issues ? Her religion ? Her morals. Her future goals. Pet lover or not ? Does she lie like she breathes ? gold digger ? The list could go on and on for many paragraphs. 

One thing is darn sure. The above can not happen in 48 hours.


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

Murrmurr said:


> Or does _he_ visit them?....for weeks at a time.


mama's baby, papa's maybe


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

senior chef said:


> A person, any person, male or female, develops true love over a period of time.  It is impossible to really know someone in 48 hours. Emotionally mature people, give the matter a great deal of thought before "falling in love".  Falling in "like" is one thing. Falling in "horney" is quite common.  BUT, no psychologist would ever give a specific number of hours to "falling in love".
> 
> Before I fell in love, serious love, I'd need to know about the interests of the woman. Hobbies etc. Also, the number of hours she worked/week. Her politics. Is she willing to negotiate on vital issues ? Her religion ? Her morals. Her future goals. Pet lover or not ? Does she lie like she breathes ? gold digger ? The list could go on and on for many paragraphs.
> 
> One thing is darn sure. The above can not happen in 48 hours.


I dunno, I'm feelin' like I may be fallin' for you now. I knew I loved pizza the first time I ate it and I knew I loved sex the first time I had it. I've loved my children even since before they were born so I guess I don't quite agree with your thinking. But hey, far be it from me to advise anyone to do the thngs I've done, that is unless you want to end up where I am with the same things as I have. Didn't Kiss, the band, write a song about you? Calling, Dr Love?


----------



## Gaer (Aug 19, 2021)

senior chef said:


> A person, any person, male or female, develops true love over a period of time.  It is impossible to really know someone in 48 hours. Emotionally mature people, give the matter a great deal of thought before "falling in love".  Falling in "like" is one thing. Falling in "horney" is quite common.  BUT, no psychologist would ever give a specific number of hours to "falling in love".
> 
> Before I fell in love, serious love, I'd need to know about the interests of the woman. Hobbies etc. Also, the number of hours she worked/week. Her politics. Is she willing to negotiate on vital issues ? Her religion ? Her morals. Her future goals. Pet lover or not ? Does she lie like she breathes ? gold digger ? The list could go on and on for many paragraphs.
> 
> One thing is darn sure. The above can not happen in 48 hours.


Yer darn tootin!


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

The best thing about asking for advice about something like this is that if it goes well, you can say, "Yeah, I knew it would work out all along." And if it goes bad, you can blame it all on the bad "advice" you were given.


----------



## Chris P Bacon (Aug 19, 2021)

Gaer said:


> Yer darn tootin!








darn!


----------



## Murrmurr (Aug 19, 2021)

Chris P Bacon said:


> How many hours does it take to feel love and express your feelings to someone, in your opinion? And "I don't know" isn't an answer. 49? 50? 100?  1000?


Same number of hours as it takes to know the person. Took me about 5 months or so. Took her only about 3, but I'm an open book.


----------



## Robert59 (Aug 19, 2021)

Murrmurr said:


> Or does _he_ visit them?....for weeks at a time.


I don't know anything about her ex-husband. She never said anything. He might not pay child support. She said she would never get married again.


----------



## Murrmurr (Aug 19, 2021)

Robert59 said:


> I don't know anything about her ex-husband. She never said anything. He might not pay child support. She said she would never get married again.


I'd want to know how involved he is in the kids' lives.
And how big he is.


----------

