# Sharing a home with strangers



## Jondalar7 (Feb 21, 2021)

I used to dream of living in a commune sharing everything. I have visited a few but they were too full of young people with weaker work ethics than this old man. I built a 3000 SQ. foot home in 89 and after the divorce I started letting friends stay here. Gradually I started renting rooms hoping to find people who wanted to live here permanently and share in the gardens and shops. A few took interest and stayed for years but all moved on to romantic or job opportunities. Is it hard to share a home? How could I create something that they would feel more permanent in?


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## Keesha (Feb 21, 2021)

Welcome to the forum Jon. Why don’t you tell us a bit about yourself?

I can’t really answer your question since I don’t know enough about you or your circumstances.
What type of home is it?
Do you share chores?
Do you cook together?
Do you share common interests?
Do you have a set of rules to follow?
What type of roommates do you attract?

I think it’s perfectly normal for people to gravitate to romantic relationships and / or job opportunities so you can’t really find fault with that.


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## Gaer (Feb 21, 2021)

Welcome!  We are anxious to hear your opinions on things!


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## Jondalar7 (Feb 21, 2021)

Gaer said:


> Welcome!  We are anxious to hear your opinions on things!


Hello,  Your art was one of the first things I viewed on this site. You are truly gifted at creating beautiful things.


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## Gaer (Feb 21, 2021)

Jondalar7 said:


> Hello,  Your art was one of the first things I viewed on this site. You are truly gifted at creating beautiful things.


Wow!  Thank you!  Did you view the paintings, the sculptures or the cartoons?
Anyway Your comments are very kind!


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## Jondalar7 (Feb 21, 2021)

Keesha said:


> Welcome to the forum Jon. Why don’t you tell us a bit about yourself?
> 
> I can’t really answer your question since I don’t know enough about you or your circumstances.
> What type of home is it?
> ...


This home is two story on 1 1/4 acre in a very safe neighborhood. Each bedroom is 200+ sq. ft. with a sink in the room. The three second floor rooms have private balconies. The second floor has a kitchen and full bath also. The first floor has four bedrooms, kitchen, two dinning rooms, two refrigerators and two bathrooms, living room with a wood stove and laundry room. Rose garden in the front of the house, raised herb garden on the east side with fruit trees and in the back a hot tub room, greenhouse, 40x25 garden, chicken pen, tee pee and a life size grizzly bear I made out of stucco. We have a rotating chore list that everyone is on. Laundry days, we have separate shelves for food and sometimes get together for shared meals. I have shared my home with a former Miss America, Buddhist monk, woodcarver, author, Reiki master and a biker gal. I write my add hoping to find permanent people but I also accept good people who show up. I accept that most people who need to rent a room are not exactly where they hope to be in life so I help and wish them well on their journey.


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## Jondalar7 (Feb 21, 2021)

Gaer said:


> Wow!  Thank you!  Did you view the paintings, the sculptures or the cartoons?
> Anyway Your comments are very kind!


Loved the paintings and was totally blown away by the sculptures. I spent endless hours carving a small bear.  I did not see cartoons so I will go back and check them out.


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## Keesha (Feb 21, 2021)

.... Last time I ever fall for that


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## Jondalar7 (Feb 21, 2021)

Keesha said:


> Welcome to the forum Jon. Why don’t you tell us a bit about yourself?
> 
> I can’t really answer your question since I don’t know enough about you or your circumstances.
> What type of home is it?
> ...


I guess the question I am asking is if you were to consider sharing a property with several other people, what things would you want to see there? If you wanted to stay for the rest of your days even until we need to have home healthcare (I have an attached studio for that person) What kind of security would you want to be all in?


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## Jondalar7 (Feb 21, 2021)

Keesha said:


> .... Last time I ever fall for that


what did you fall for?


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## OneEyedDiva (Feb 21, 2021)

Welcome to the forum. I can't advise you on this because I would never consider house sharing but it sounds like you have a lovely house and property. I don't know what you charge so cost might be a factor and people who are just rooming might have more of a tendency to move on no matter how nice or comfortable a place is.


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## Jules (Feb 21, 2021)

What is the longest anyone has stayed and what is the average?


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## hollydolly (Feb 22, 2021)




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## Jondalar7 (Feb 22, 2021)

Jules said:


> What is the longest anyone has stayed and what is the average?


A few have stayed three years and recently one is still her for her sixth year and another just moved in with her family after five years. Several try other things and come back home for awhile. Two here now for over two years. There are many that stay for less than a year if they are just coming out of bad things and just stay here to get life back together.


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## Pinky (Feb 22, 2021)

Welcome, from Toronto. Your life sounds interesting


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## Tish (Feb 22, 2021)




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## Butterfly (Feb 23, 2021)

Jondalar7 said:


> This home is two story on 1 1/4 acre in a very safe neighborhood. Each bedroom is 200+ sq. ft. with a sink in the room. The three second floor rooms have private balconies. The second floor has a kitchen and full bath also. The first floor has four bedrooms, kitchen, two dinning rooms, two refrigerators and two bathrooms, living room with a wood stove and laundry room. Rose garden in the front of the house, raised herb garden on the east side with fruit trees and in the back a hot tub room, greenhouse, 40x25 garden, chicken pen, tee pee and a life size grizzly bear I made out of stucco. We have a rotating chore list that everyone is on. Laundry days, we have separate shelves for food and sometimes get together for shared meals. I have shared my home with a former Miss America, Buddhist monk, woodcarver, author, Reiki master and a biker gal. I write my add hoping to find permanent people but I also accept good people who show up. *I accept that most people who need to rent a room are not exactly where they hope to be in life *so I help and wish them well on their journey.



I think the highlighted words above are probably the biggest reason people don't stay permanently.  I personally would not view a rented room, no matter how wonderful it was, as a place I would want to stay for the rest of my life.


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## Jondalar7 (Feb 23, 2021)

Butterfly said:


> I think the highlighted words above are probably the biggest reason people don't stay permanently.  I personally would not view a rented room, no matter how wonderful it was, as a place I would want to stay for the rest of my life.


I agree, my question is how could I change the rented room idea. I have a permanent place to call home even though I want to live for a time in the southeast.


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## Dana (Feb 23, 2021)

No...sharing my home is out of the question although I do have accommodation for short term visitors and of course a place for our children if they ever needed it.
I love my own company and my privacy. I share with hubby and that's enough


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## officerripley (Feb 23, 2021)

The ideal for me would be a little apartment (flat) or cottage of my own in a building or complex with at least one common area where you could gather when you wanted to socialize but could withdraw to your own unit when wanting to be alone.


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## Jondalar7 (Feb 27, 2021)

officerripley said:


> The ideal for me would be a little apartment (flat) or cottage of my own in a building or complex with at least one common area where you could gather when you wanted to socialize but could withdraw to your own unit when wanting to be alone.


I have an attached studio apt. and the gal there loves it and wants to stay forever. Like you say she pops in to visit from time to time or to ask for help hanging a plant or picture.


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