# Visiting House Guests - How long is too long?



## Gardenlover (Feb 26, 2020)

I like visitors, but I enjoy them more when they stay no more than 3-5 days.

My kids and grandchildren are the exception, they can stay 7 days.


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## Lvstotrvl (Feb 26, 2020)

A week for friends, a month for family only because we all have dogs n it gets a little crowded.


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## Gary O' (Feb 26, 2020)

*Visiting House Guests - How long is too long?*

One day, I don't care who they are, I'm helping 'em pack their bags

I don't know how folks do the week thing, or even two/three days

Now, if it's an event, like a fishing trip, that's different


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## RadishRose (Feb 26, 2020)

How many are we talking about here?

One or two- stay as long as you want, but after two weeks, start chipping in if you want to stay longer.

More?  I never had more who scheduled themselves for more than a weekend


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## JaniceM (Feb 26, 2020)

Unless there are some kind of special circumstances, I think houseguests generally wear out their welcome after the third day or so-  host/hostess getting tired, guests interfering with individuals/family's everyday life, etc.


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## Wren (Feb 26, 2020)

My daughter could  stay forever if she wanted to anybody else, 4 hours is plenty ...


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## Aunt Bea (Feb 26, 2020)

I used to be ok with having overnight guests but I've become set in my ways and would rather foot the bill for them to stay at a local hotel than have them stay with me in my apartment.

A quick visit is fine if they call first but I'm the same way with entertaining I would rather meet people at a local pub or restaurant and pick up the check.

I feel the same way about being a guest in other people's homes.

The people that I care about accept my idiosyncrasies and the rest don't matter.


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## Pinky (Feb 26, 2020)

We used to have numerous visitors when we lived in Niagara Falls .. felt like we were running a hotel. However, our guests only stayed a few days, and they usually took us out for dinner every second day. They also helped themselves to breakfast and lunch with whatever was provided, and helped with cleaning up. 

Now, we're in a 2 bedroom condo, but the second bedroom is not a bedroom .. so, there is no room for visitors. However, if my daughter ever needed to stay, we would rearrange to accommodate her.


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## OneEyedDiva (Feb 26, 2020)

The house guest would be one of my grandchildren or my son. I don't get any other house guests. Several years ago, my son and his ex (mother of two of my grandchildren) stayed here with the children for a few months due to extenuating circumstances. It worked out well...they had a built in babysitter and I had a built in cook.


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## Lc jones (Feb 26, 2020)

We have such a easy going flow at our house it’s just my husband and I and our son that if anyone else stays it just throws us off, we’re happy to see everyone but there is an adjustment I’ve discovered after about one or two days that’s about it for me my husband may be even shorter ha ha


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## C'est Moi (Feb 26, 2020)

My children and grandchildren can stay as long as they want.   Anyone else will be given directions to a nearby motel.


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## Giantsfan1954 (Feb 26, 2020)

"Fish and guests start to stink after 3 days". Forget who said it.


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## win231 (Feb 27, 2020)

Depends on the situation.
I had a friend, wife & 2 kids stay at my place for 5 days during riots.  Most of the rioting was 20 miles away but there were a few scattered incidents within 10 miles.
They told me, "We don't have the firepower you have."


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## CinnamonSugar (Feb 27, 2020)

Giantsfan1954 said:


> "Fish and guests start to stink after 3 days". Forget who said it.


Mark Twain, I believe


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## Lee (Feb 27, 2020)

My cousin goes to stay with her daughter overseas twice a year for 8 weeks with the excuse that with the cost of air fare it only makes sense.

Her daughter constantly complains to me about it so I told her she should just make plans to be away at that time. Mom said that since they were not using their home she may as well use it. Some people just don't take a hint.


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## ronaldj (Feb 27, 2020)

I think it was Ben Franklin


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## old medic (Feb 27, 2020)

Totally depends.... My Mom is welcome to live with us.... Her BF I'm sick of in about 10 minutes... on a good day...
My MIL came from NY for an extended visit to see about living in NC.... At 18 Months I told the Wife one of us was leaving...
Remodeling the house we bought from 3 bedrooms to 2.... 
and that room will be a hobby room with an uncomfortable couch with a hide-a-bed.


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## Sassycakes (Feb 27, 2020)

*If someone visits it depends on how they act. If it is anyone from my immediate family they can stay as long as they want.*


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## Pepper (Feb 27, 2020)

This is your own fault, Gardenlover, for having trouble with overstaying guests.  You live in the beautiful FLA Keys.  You should move to someplace horrible.


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## Gardenlover (Feb 27, 2020)

Pepper said:


> This is your own fault, Gardenlover, for having trouble with overstaying guests.  You live in the beautiful FLA Keys.  You should move to someplace horrible.


I can always count on you to bring a smile to my heart and a chuckle to my lips.


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## Pecos (Feb 27, 2020)

I have a lovely Aunt who can stay for a month.
My son and his wife, 3 days.
My Grandson, a week.
My Daughter and her significant other 4 days.
My Brothers 2 days.
My Granddaughter 1 day.

I got a lot of visitors when I lived in Spain, Hawaii, and Monterey. It became a bit tedious.


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## Butterfly (Feb 28, 2020)

My son could move back in if he wanted to.  My sister is welcome to stay with me when she needs to.  She stayed with me after surgery for a couple weeks and once for a day of two when there was some problem at her apartment -- plumbing or some such.  She always goes back to her own apartment as soon as she's able to.   Others -- I do not like overnight guests and I am uncomfortable staying at others' homes, too.


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## jerry old (Feb 28, 2020)

if you invited them, and there was no discussion of the length of their stay, you can drop hints, then strong hints, packing their suitcases is bad form
Parent's, children-especially children that have lost their job: forever guest.

mental brakes downs are helpful, biting the carpet is good, frequent falling down drunk and assaultive is helpful.  Oh there a lot of ploys; however
close relatives know your ploys, "Dad's just being hintful again, ignore him."

If you mean as a snake, folks don't tend to visit-just a hint


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## Ruthanne (Feb 29, 2020)

The guests I have had over the years have known when they should leave and left after a few hours.  

If I should ever meet a special man that I would like a whole lot I think I might tell him to stay as long as he wants but of course he'd have other things to do and would know when to leave too.


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## Ruth n Jersey (Feb 29, 2020)

We use to have guests all the time. At our age we would worry about finding them dead in bed. 
Back then it really depended who they were. 
We had people we could tolerate for a day or two and others who could stay a month and we were sad to see them go.


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## charry (Feb 29, 2020)

5 mins ..


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## jujube (Feb 29, 2020)

Too many variables.

Are they picky eaters? I had guests once who couldn't drink their coffee because I only had 2% milk on hand.  Another one didn't like the brand of pomegranate juice I had on hand.  So they aren't free-range eggs or organic carrots or the "right kind" of steel-cut oats.  Deal with it, folks.  It's not going to kill you. 

Are they bored easily?  Do they want to be constantly carted around?  If you have some activities planned for them but they don't want to do them, can they suggest other things they'd like to do or do they just hang around looking disappointed?  Can they amuse themselves if you have other obligations?

Are these people who fall apart if things go wrong?  If it rains on a beach day?  If a particular attraction isn't open on Mondays?

Can they take things as they come?  My guest room used to have twin beds.  One couple HAD to have the beds pushed together for just a one-night stay.  It involved moving furniture.   They couldn't sleep five feet apart for one night....

I would never expect a guest to scrub the bathtub or clean the toilets or mop the floor.  But do they at least take their coffee cup to the sink?  Do they at least _offer_ to help with after-meal clean up?  I never accept the help, but it's nice to ask.

I had some wonderful guests once who I transported to and from the airport and let them use my extra car while they were here and in return, we went out to wonderful restaurants (they're "foodies") I would have never gone to on my own and I was never allowed to pay for anything.  They could have stayed for a month.


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## Gardenlover (Mar 1, 2020)

jujube said:


> Too many variables.
> 
> Are they picky eaters? I had guests once who couldn't drink their coffee because I only had 2% milk on hand.  Another one didn't like the brand of pomegranate juice I had on hand.  So they aren't free-range eggs or organic carrots or the "right kind" of steel-cut oats.  Deal with it, folks.  It's not going to kill you.
> 
> ...


jujube, excellent reply, I can relate to every word in your post.


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## DaveA (Mar 1, 2020)

WE haven't had a guest stay at our home in years, with the exception of our immediate family.  We all bounce around from house to house during the year.  We use everything from beds, to couches, to air mattresses.  No ceremony with our crowd.  If someone's visiting from our Conn. family, their other siblings, and/or nieces and nephews (who live nearby) can be counted on to drop by for a visit.  No one usually stay more than 2 or 3 days, but we all live within 100 miles of each other so it's easy to keep in physical touch.

As we're in our 80's, the kids move right into the kitchen and take care of feeding the crowd leaving my wife and I to just visit. Couldn't ask for a better group. They're all welcome any time.

Tougher for folks who are spread out all across the country or even tougher if overseas.  For those folks, I  would imagine, visits have to be a bit more structured  and planned for.


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## Marlene (Mar 1, 2020)

depends upon who it is.  Not very long for anyone as I live in a small apartment.


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