# Help !......what is this critter ?



## IKE (Jul 23, 2017)

I just looked out the window and saw a whole passel of these odd looking critters in the backyard munching away on my jalapeno peppers and now I'm scared to death to step outside.

Anybody know what it is ?.......are they dangerous ?


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## Shalimar (Jul 23, 2017)

Ike, you are wise to be afraid. This is a fine example of the highly poisonous North American antlered killer rabbit. Socially engineered in the 60's to drive off hippie squatters from valuable land, they have since spread unchecked, and are now a pernicious threat. Fearless, quite mad, they will attack without warning, leaping for your jugular with their six inch incisors. They produce a neurotoxin which, entering a victim's bloodstream, causes complete paralysis in sixty seconds, enabling this
vicious predator to consume it's victim alive.


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## helenbacque (Jul 23, 2017)

Looks like a Jackalope to me.  Dangerous?  Haven't a clue but if they are snacking on your jalapenos they must be tough little critters.


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## Vega_Lyra (Jul 23, 2017)

Strange creatures....


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## Katybug (Jul 23, 2017)

Shalimar said:


> Ike, you are wise to be afraid. This is a fine example of the highly poisonous North American antlered killer rabbit. Socially engineered in the 60's to drive off hippie squatters from valuable land, they have since spread unchecked, and are now a pernicious threat. Fearless, quite mad, they will attack without warning, leaping for your jugular with their six inch incisors. They produce a neurotoxin which, entering a victim's bloodstream, causes complete paralysis in sixty seconds, enabling this
> vicious predator to consume it's victim alive.



Love your sense of humor!


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## Shalimar (Jul 23, 2017)

Katybug said:


> Love your sense of humor!


Why thank you, Katybug! Just another example of warped Canadianyr humour.


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## SifuPhil (Jul 23, 2017)

Ike, I'm afraid what you have there is a *Mexican Jackalope*. It's a member of the Jackalope family, as Helenbacque mentioned, but _Jackalopus Mexicanus _is far more dangerous than its American cousin. 

For starters, it migrates into this country illegally, hopping over the border at unregulated spots such as dried river beds and taco stands. President Trump had mentioned the need for a JackaFence, but it was shot down in the House. 

The example you have there must be an albino, because they normally look like this:



These poor creatures come to this country for food and work but are usually attacked and clubbed, being mistaken for piñatas. 

One group called _Save The Jacks_, based in Texas, is trying to purchase large plots of land that will be known as *JackaLots* to offer sanctuary for this endangered specie.

Unfortunately, if Trump's bill passes, everyone will be trying to run the Jacks off.


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## Shalimar (Jul 23, 2017)

SifuPhil said:


> Ike, I'm afraid what you have there is a *Mexican Jackalope*. It's a member of the Jackalope family, as Helenbacque mentioned, but _Jackalopus Mexicanus _is far more dangerous than its American cousin.
> 
> For starters, it migrates into this country illegally, hopping over the border at unregulated spots such as dried river beds and taco stands. President Trump had mentioned the need for a JackaFence, but it was shot down in the House.
> 
> ...


Omg! PS. Perhaps we should defer the wedding until after you have  completed a through psychiatric evaluation?????


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## SifuPhil (Jul 23, 2017)

Shalimar said:


> Omg! PS. Perhaps we should defer the wedding until after you have  completed a through psychiatric evaluation?????



Um, already had several of them. Didn't help any, but my pshrinks are now all driving Mercedes'.


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## Butterfly (Jul 23, 2017)

It's a Jackalope, all  right.  Here in New Mexico we are infested with them.  Nasty critters, they are.


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## Shalimar (Jul 23, 2017)

SifuPhil said:


> Um, already had several of them. Didn't help any, but my pshrinks are now all driving Mercedes'.


Hmmmmm, doesn't sound good, Philly. I don't know if I'm ready to spend the rest of my life with someone who fantasises about spotted illegal bunnies.


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## SifuPhil (Jul 23, 2017)

Shalimar said:


> Hmmmmm, doesn't sound good, Philly. I don't know if I'm ready to spend the rest of my life with someone who fantasises about spotted illegal bunnies.



Would you prefer I fantasize about other things, such as, oh ... striped elephants?


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## IKE (Jul 23, 2017)

I'm now thinking about selling the house but because the infestation seems to be increasing by the minute I'm afraid of rapidly decreasing property values......What should I do ?


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## SifuPhil (Jul 23, 2017)

IKE said:


> I'm now thinking about selling the house but because the infestation seems to be increasing by the minute I'm afraid of rapidly decreasing property values......What should I do ?



You might qualify for a government grant to start one of those sanctuaries. Heck, you might even make some money breeding them, or come up with a new variety ... the Ikealope!

... I hear they taste like chicken ...


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## IKE (Jul 23, 2017)

SifuPhil said:


> Heck, you might even make some money breeding them.



Say What ??.......I might be from Oklahoma but I'll have you know I don't play that Philly !


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## SifuPhil (Jul 23, 2017)

IKE said:


> Say What ??.......I might be from Oklahoma but I'll have you know I don't play that Philly !



No, no, I meant ... ah, fergit it! 

... although ... that DOES open up some intriguing possibilities ...


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## Shalimar (Jul 23, 2017)

SifuPhil said:


> No, no, I meant ... ah, fergit it!
> 
> ... although ... that DOES open up some intriguing possibilities ...
> 
> View attachment 39623


My eyes! My eyes!


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## Shalimar (Jul 23, 2017)

SifuPhil said:


> Would you prefer I fantasize about other things, such as, oh ... striped elephants?
> 
> View attachment 39621


Yes. I am quite fond of the prison stripe effect on this pachyderm.


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## SifuPhil (Jul 23, 2017)

Shalimar said:


> Yes. I am quite fond of the prison stripe effect on this pachyderm.



Poor pachyderm prisoner!


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## Lon (Jul 23, 2017)

Katybug said:


> Love your sense of humor!



JACKALOPES have amazed many folks that have never been west of the Mississippi. I had one as a pet until he died at age 18.


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## jujube (Jul 23, 2017)

If those thangs ever start crossbreeding with the chupacabras, we won't need a wall.  Nobody will want to get in....


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## debodun (Jul 26, 2017)

Looks more like a photoshopalope.


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