# Article: Your Top 10 Objects Your Kids Don't Want



## officerripley (Nov 4, 2022)

The author of 'No Thanks Mom' tells you what to do with them; to read the article: https://www.nextavenue.org/top-10-o...166652184&mc_cid=60db55214b&mc_eid=7db4a22a9a


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## Paco Dennis (Nov 4, 2022)

Misa's son and granddaughter visited recently. They went through his old school material, and many photo's. They had a blast! He kept several of the items and her granddaughter was having a great time with it. The rest of the stuff mentioned i agree with.


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## Jace (Nov 4, 2022)

Yes, yes, yes and many other things!


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## Pinky (Nov 4, 2022)

A few years ago, we went through everything with our daughter .. valuable china, silver, etc. 
She chose a silver tray, glass dessert plates, a few cups & saucers. The rest, we donated to
Value Village, including a complete set of Royal Doulton dinnerware. I hope someone was
thrilled to purchase and enjoy it.

As for photo albums and school projects, we have a Rubbermaid container in the storage
locker, with daughter's work. We occasionally look through it with her, and she enjoys it.


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## CarolfromTX (Nov 4, 2022)

I’ll be honest. I’ve got my grandmothers  china  and I never use it.  Not dishwasher safe   And I’m sure not gonna wash it by hand.


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## DebraMae (Nov 4, 2022)

I gave one of my daughters my grandmother's china and my mother's sterling silver.  I haven't seen it since.  I hope she wanted it.


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## hollydolly (Nov 4, 2022)

I have never had any of that stuff ( apart from photos)... I think I'm probably classed as the kid that wouldn't have wanted any of it when it was being passed down...

However my DD (age 46.).. is not interested in anything in my house unless it's of high practical use.. like tools.. and more specifically electric tools.. She has everything she needs in the styles she likes.. she 's far from being a sentimentalist as well.. so she turns a complete deaf ear to my pleading for her to take her baby clothes, and school reports and certificates...


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## NorthernLight (Nov 4, 2022)

Give your china, crystal, and (real) silverware to someone who doesn't have a dishwasher. They'll wash it by hand, no problem. A silver polishing cloth once in a while, and voilà!

Also, because they're poor, they'll appreciate having some beautiful stuff.


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## hollydolly (Nov 4, 2022)

NorthernLight said:


> Give your china, crystal, and (real) silverware to someone who doesn't have a dishwasher. They'll wash it by hand, no problem. A silver polishing cloth once in a while, and voilà!
> 
> Also, because they're poor, they'll appreciate having some beautiful stuff.


 gotta laugh at you equating poverty with someone with no dishwasher...


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## NorthernLight (Nov 4, 2022)

I know what poverty is. But I think anyone who can afford a dishwasher has one!

I meant "poor" as in, can't afford good china, crystal, sterling silver, etc.


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## hollydolly (Nov 4, 2022)

NorthernLight said:


> I know what poverty is. But I think anyone who can afford a dishwasher has one!


well that's not correct.. I can afford a dishwasher but I don't have one..not in this house.. I do have one in the Spanish house but only because it was there when we bought the property.. but I don't have space for a dishwasher in this house, and neither do most of my friends in their homes here .. either, who could very well afford to buy one if they had space for it.. or indeed if they wanted one


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## Pappy (Nov 4, 2022)

We don’t have a lot of valuable stuff, but my wife has 3 Diamond rings and willed one to our daughter and the other two to 2 daughter in laws. House proceeds among my 3 kids. My golf cart, I’m going to drive up to Heaven..


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## NorthernLight (Nov 4, 2022)

hollydolly said:


> well that's not correct.. I can afford a dishwasher but I don't have one..not in this house.. I do have one in the Spanish house but only because it was there when we bought the property.. but I don't have space for a dishwasher in this house, and neither do most of my friends in their homes here .. either, who could very well afford to buy one if they had space for it.. or indeed if they wanted one


Gah. Okay, I meant, Lots of people in the US and Canada, who can't afford a dishwasher or nice dinnerware, would love to have the latter and take good care of it. "Lots of people" being me.


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## Michael Z (Nov 4, 2022)




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## Sassycakes (Nov 4, 2022)

My Dad bought my Mom a dishwasher in the 1960s. She got mad at him for spending money on it. He never told her the real reason he bought it. was because she made me and my sister wash the dishes and my sister wouldn't do them right so I wound up doing them by myself.


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## Leann (Nov 4, 2022)

I am precisely at these crossroads right now. I have boxes and boxes of china, crystal and other assorted glassware in the basement that I have been sorting through. Neither of my girls want any of it with the exception of a few Depression era pieces that were my Mother's. It's time to make the difficult decision of what to do the rest of it. Then I have boxes of the girls toys, art work and memorabilia that they aren't interested in because they went through all of it before and picked out what they wanted and left the rest. This tugs too strongly at my heartstrings. And lastly, there are maybe a half dozen or so pieces of jewelry I want them to have. All of it is deeply sentimental. They said they would decide which pieces they want and will let me know.


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## officerripley (Nov 4, 2022)

I commend those who deal with this beforehand rather than leaving it all for their kids to have to deal with it as both sets of my parents did; a hard thing to deal with when you're already grieving.


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## Manatee (Nov 4, 2022)

Some of the things that we have are curiosities like the bill of sale for the Chevrolet my father bought brand new in 1937 for $700.

We have my mother's high school science book vintage 1919.  Timeless is the book of Rudyard Kipling stories of India.

Our son went to school for a semester in Costa Rica.  We have things from there that are meaningful to him.


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## Jules (Nov 4, 2022)

Our kids don’t want most of the stuff on that list.  With a little initiative and elbow grease, they could take most of the furniture and redo it with paint and new knobs.  There‘re a few people who have great businesses doing thing.  

Come h*ll or high water they’d better travel across the country and get all my art and pottery.


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## Sunny (Nov 5, 2022)

Interesting subject. Like many people of my generation, I've managed to accumulate lots of "stuff" that my kids absolutely don't want; they are downsizing already themselves!  And the grandkids live a much different life than we did. They move at the drop of a hat, sometimes across the country, and want to travel light.

I have a feeling that when the time comes, most of my stuff will be turned over to one of those estate sales companies.


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## NorthernLight (Nov 5, 2022)

Sunny said:


> Interesting subject. Like many people of my generation, I've managed to accumulate lots of "stuff" that my kids absolutely don't want; they are downsizing already themselves!  And the grandkids live a much different life than we did. They move at the drop of a hat, sometimes across the country, and want to travel light.
> 
> I have a feeling that when the time comes, most of my stuff will be turned over to one of those estate sales companies.


Yes, it is interesting! 

I don't have to worry what will happen to my stuff, because it already happened. I've spent my whole life moving and leaving things behind. I had to pawn some jewelry I'd inherited. I don't have any photos.

I do worry about who to leave my bank account and car to though. Mostly I see them as a burden -- a mess for someone to clean up. Not really worth anything.


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## debodun (Nov 5, 2022)

In general, thirty-somethings and younger have no interest in family heirlooms. Collecting antiques and_ object d'art_ is a thing of the past. When my mom passed, I thought I'd make a fortune selling her antiques and collections of vintage china and glassware (you've probably seen my photos). I tried having lawn sales, and selling through local online sites like Marketplace, NextDoor and CraigsList without much luck. Auctioneers and antique shops don't want it either because they aren't selling. I have a beautiful large Eastlake style wall mirror, a piecrust tilt-top table and a Federal style mahogany dresser that my parents bought at auction in the 1970s. I don't know what they paid, but I started at $100 each online. When I didn't get any response, I dropped it to $50 and nothing. Then $25 and zippo. So there you go.


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## RadishRose (Nov 5, 2022)

Manatee said:


> Some of the things that we have are curiosities like the bill of sale for the Chevrolet my father bought brand new in 1937 for $700.


$700 in 1937 equals $13,940.10 in 2022​https://www.saving.org/inflation/inflation.php?amount=700&year=1937


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## debodun (Nov 5, 2022)

That would still be a bargain in today's money.


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## StarSong (Nov 5, 2022)

My children are deep in their thirties and already have plenty of practical and beautiful possessions, some of which came from my mother's home when when she died 8 years ago.  

Perhaps my grandchildren will be starting their homes when it's time to purge mine. If not, my possessions will be sold off or donated somewhere, I'm sure. It's the way of the world. They're entitled to choose their lifestyles.  

Just as I didn't feel obligated to take on my parents' or in-laws' possessions, neither would I burden my children or grandchildren with any guilt about keeping mine.


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## hollydolly (Nov 5, 2022)

NorthernLight said:


> Yes, it is interesting!
> 
> I don't have to worry what will happen to my stuff, because it already happened. I've spent my whole life moving and leaving things behind. I had to pawn some jewelry I'd inherited. I don't have any photos.
> 
> I do worry about who to leave my bank account and car to though. Mostly I see them as a burden -- a mess for someone to clean up. Not really worth anything.


you can leave 'em to me.. I'll take on that burden for you...


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## Teacher Terry (Nov 5, 2022)

I have massively downsized and have given my kids the few things that they wanted. I still use a few antiques that my youngest son wants when I am gone. I didn’t want to burden my kids and really love my smaller place that is much easier and faster to clean.


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## Blessed (Nov 5, 2022)

All I can do is tell them this belonged to so and so.  How I got it, what it means to me. They will have to decide what they want, offer other things to family.  I am not going to worry about it.  As long as I have my home, they are with me.  If I have to go into care I will deal with it then. There are a few things that are valuable but most sentimental.


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## Gary O' (Nov 5, 2022)

Don't think I'll be caring much about what my kids don't want

After inheriting our places, 
they're gonna hafta wrestle over who gets to make all the hauls to Goodwill


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## Pookie (Nov 5, 2022)

My daughter probably won't want the piano, so I am going to donate that soon. China cabinet ... ugh. Kids these days really don't use good china. We like it for special dinners, holidays, and all.
I have some jewelry that is nice, but it's mostly from my mom.


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## ManjaroKDE (Nov 6, 2022)

We are big on de-cluttering, when I realized that with age I could no longer do many things I did when younger.  What are my interests are not necessarily my kid's interest.  we have a mountain retreat we bought 20+ years ago, never did anything with it.  My son has been building on it.   We paid our eldest daughter her share of the value, and offered to pay the youngest daughter.  She decided to keep her share, but now lives 700 miles away and has never shown much interest and probably never will.

I have given all my tools and equipment to my SIL, he works in construction and wanted what he could use.  My son has all my guns, which was not many.  He got most of our yard equipment,  My daughters helped clear out our two storage bays and kept what they wanted.  The rest was donated (or given away) if not sold at a few yard sales we held.  We moved all our remaining goods to a small home in a senior HOA with an 8 foot utility trailer and small pickup.  My wife had many hobbies of which most of her creations were given to our g-children (each with their personal treasure choices), some sold, some not.

We try to keep purchases to only necessities &  maintain our 'stuff collecting' to a minimum.  My wife reads, plays computer games, works puzzles or tends her flowers.  While I surf, busy myself with re-installing OS's on my laptop or watch movies on our streaming services.  We socialize with our neighbors, get our daily walk and enjoy our retired time.  Traveled when younger, saw America and now live with our memories without unnecessary travel.


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## fuzzybuddy (Nov 6, 2022)

Really, when was the last time you threw a state dinner, where only the best china, and silverware would do?  Online, you can see people's homes, today, it's totally uncluttered, stark, bare. When you look at my place, there's all kind of stuff everywhere. It's definitely 1980s-90s. Plus, your stuff is valuable to you, if you don't have the same emotional attachment to it, it's junk.


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## StarSong (Nov 6, 2022)

fuzzybuddy said:


> Really, when was the last time you threw a state dinner, where only the best china, and silverware would do?


Every Christmas Eve and Christmas Day I bring out my favorite china (inherited from my mom) and my silver for my favorite people (my family).  



fuzzybuddy said:


> Online, you can see people's homes, today, it's totally uncluttered, stark, bare.


Maybe they're uncluttered, stark and bare in photos (staging by realtors and remodeling contractors), but in real life most people's homes are anything but that.  Including the homes of young people.


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## Alligatorob (Nov 6, 2022)

NorthernLight said:


> I think anyone who can afford a dishwasher has one!


I never put a dishwasher or garbage disposal in a house with a septic tank.  That would be for about 1/2 of my life.  Now on city sewer and happy to have both!


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## rwb (Nov 7, 2022)

We sold our primary resident in 2002 and opened a new business venture.  We decided to rent for the foreseeable future and  we offered  my son's and their wives to take whatever they wanted.  At that time they were in their late 20's and early 30's and both took what they wanted.  Most of what they took included handmade articles that my Danish wife's mother had made for Christmas and special occasions and Silverware from my grandmother.  The rest we sold or donated to charity.  Now we are living in a nice home in Coastal SC.  Since most of the keepsakes are gone. The furnished house will be left to the our 2 boys and their families to do with as they choose.  Since both live up north, they may keep the house as a 2nd home they can share  and take turns using during the year or sell it.  We have seriously downsized and not added much since moving to SC in 2013.  So there won't be much to unload after we are gone.


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## Skyking (Dec 27, 2022)

Great post! I'm sad to say but if I rule out money, the next 10 things could be anything I own or treasure. They just don't care. They love me but when it comes to stuff they, like me, have too much of it to want more.


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## debodun (Dec 27, 2022)

I know.... After inheriting my mother's vast collections of china and glassware and trying to sell it. You can't even give away most things. Everyone wants their own stuff and they want it NEW. When people are eating out of pizza boxes and fast food bags, what do they need a huge set of china for? There used to be 5 or 6 collectibles/second hand shops in Mechanicville a few years ago. They have all gone OOB. The auction houses around here are closed and the few operating are only taking "in-demand" collectibles or precious metals. Antiques are OUT right now.

My garage sale last May. Ended up bringing most of it back inside.


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## Llynn (Dec 27, 2022)

I'm with Gary O. I don't buy much these days but every time I do I tell my Daughter she just gained another thing to get rid of when I croak.


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## Llynn (Dec 27, 2022)

debodun said:


> I know.... After inheriting my mother's vast collections of china and glassware and trying to sell it. You can't even give away most things. Everyone wants their own stuff and they want it NEW. When people are eating out of pizza boxes and fast food bags, what do they need a huge set of china for? There used to be 5 or 6 collectibles/second hand shops in Mechanicville a few years ago. They have all gone OOB. The auction houses around here are closed and the few operating are only taking "in-demand" collectibles or precious metals. Antiques are OUT right now.
> 
> My garage sale last May. Ended up bringing most of it back inside.
> View attachment 258994


I think my G.Grandfather who was a tall ship sailor, had that picture (the one in front) on his wall. My Grandfather left it there as long as he lived.


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## JaniceM (Dec 27, 2022)

Llynn said:


> I think my G.Grandfather who was a tall ship sailor, had that picture (the one in front) on his wall. My Grandfather left it there as long as he lived.


My first thought was Winslow Homer.  But I didn't want to guess and be mistaken.


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## 1955 (Dec 27, 2022)

I don't have any kids so I'm planning to have an auction firm liquidate everything & give the proceeds to a charitable organization.


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## Knight (Dec 27, 2022)

officerripley said:


> The author of 'No Thanks Mom' tells you what to do with them; to read the article: https://www.nextavenue.org/top-10-o...166652184&mc_cid=60db55214b&mc_eid=7db4a22a9a


Seems like most of the list contains items that Deb has to sell.


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## Jules (Dec 27, 2022)

NorthernLight said:


> Gah. Okay, I meant, Lots of people in the US and Canada, who can't afford a dishwasher or nice dinnerware, would love to have the latter and take good care of it. *"Lots of people" being me.*


Do you have a local Gifting site on something like FB?  People offer or ask for things they need and may not be able to afford.  

I’ll bet if you said you’d enjoy having a few nice pieces of dinnerware, silverware or glasses, you’d have many donors.  So many seniors are tried and feel sad when they have to take items to thrift stores.  I have things that I’d gladly give to someone who would appreciate them.


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## Jules (Dec 27, 2022)

I‘m going to ask my DDs and DGDs if they ever might want my mother’s dinnerware.  It’s not china, just a unique pattern.  I’ll send them a couple of photos.  If the expected answer is no, I’m going to start using it.  It won’t stand up to the high pressure of the dishwasher but I’ve decided I’d rather use it than have the kids disposing of it later.


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## debodun (Dec 27, 2022)

About 10 years ago, I sold a large set of Johnson Brothers dinnerware in the Strawberry Fair pattern for $100. It was a setting for 12 and had the sugar & creamer and a gravy boat included. This is what the pattern looked like:

https://www.replacements.com/china-johnson-brothers-strawberry-fair-pink/c/46347


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## Lewkat (Dec 27, 2022)

My son is digitalizing all our family's old pictures.

He wants to sell my grandfather's secretary, and I am about to give in since it's out of place in his house.  My apartment is far too small for such a large piece of furniture.


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## JaniceM (Dec 27, 2022)

Jules said:


> Do you have a local Gifting site on something like FB?  People offer or ask for things they need and may not be able to afford.
> 
> I’ll bet if you said you’d enjoy having a few nice pieces of dinnerware, silverware or glasses, you’d have many donors.  So many seniors are tried and feel sad when they have to take items to thrift stores.  I have things that I’d gladly give to someone who would appreciate them.


I've never heard of anything like that.. but it sounds like a really nice idea!!


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## debodun (Dec 27, 2022)

After my mom passed. I sent a truckload of items to an auction. The auctioneer was highly recommended to me, but he didn't get much. A china cabinet and 8 foot long oak bench only sone for $20 and $10, respectively. He combined all my mom's jewelry into one box lot that sold for $2. And a box lot of Stengl and Heigel pottery sold for $3. After the sale, a lot of the "better" items tat didn't sell didn't turn up when I went to retrieve them.


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## StarSong (Dec 27, 2022)

This popped up just now so I reread the article.  Truth is, I own very little of what's on that list.  
*10. Books:* I've donated nearly all my books over the years.  Have a few cookbooks remaining, but that's about it.  I use the public library fpr real and ebooks.  
*9. Paper ephemera: *ditched all the stuff we inherited from parents and have only a few photo albums remaining.  Never did save greeting cards, paperwork, etc.  Drawings from when my children were small?  I laminated them and use them as shelving paper.  Brings me a smile.  
*8. Steamer trunks, sewing machines and film projectors: *Nope, nope and nope.
*7. Porcelain figurine collections and Bradford exchange cabinet pieces:*  Nope
*6. Silver plated objects: *I have service for 16 in silver plated flatware.  One of my children might be interested in it.  As for their comments about polishing silver, very few people need to bother anymore.  My silver chest is lined in something that keeps the silver from tarnishing.  
*5. Heavy, dark, antique furniture*: nope.  I do, however have a few lovely mid-century modern pieces that my children covet. (Barcelona chairs, for instance)
*4. Persian rugs:* Nope
*3. Linens: * None worth passing along.
*2. Sterling silver flatware & crystal wine services: *Have a set of SS flatware awarded to my Great-great grandfather (or maybe GGG grandfather) by Queen Victoria as a prize for winning a footrace. At least one of my children has expressed great interest in it. I own beautiful hand cut Orrefors, Waterford and similarly high quality crystal vases, bowls, glassware, etc. Whatever my children/grands don't want they will likely pass along as keepsakes to friends of theirs whom we've known over the years. 
*1. Fine Porcelain Dinnerware: *I inherited a set of 12 dinner plates and bring them out at Christmastime only. They stay well wrapped in heavy towels for storage. When they can be found on the internet they fetch over $100 per plate, plus shipping. I have little doubt one of my children or grands will use them for holidays in their own home one day.

*Bottom line -* If you have beautiful pieces, items with intrinsic value, or expensive, highly useful tools, your children are likely to find room for them in their homes.  Run of the mill stuff, kitschy dust collectors, etc., not so much.  

14K & 18K gold, diamond, precious stone, and platinum jewelry are coveted, but silver (other than coins) and costume jewelry (even the expensive stuff) gets pitched or donated. Exceptions would be unexpected collectibles like first generation Swatch watches.


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## hearlady (Dec 27, 2022)

I read something like this on a minimalist site.
I stopped trying to give my children my things. They were polite about it.
They do like that I saved a lot of toys. When the grands come to visit they are busy for hours with the legos, Lincoln logs, barbies, superheros, ponys, blocks, omagles, on and on.


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## NorthernLight (Dec 27, 2022)

Jules said:


> Do you have a local Gifting site on something like FB?  People offer or ask for things they need and may not be able to afford.
> 
> I’ll bet if you said you’d enjoy having a few nice pieces of dinnerware, silverware or glasses, you’d have many donors.  So many seniors are tried and feel sad when they have to take items to thrift stores.  I have things that I’d gladly give to someone who would appreciate them.


Thank you for the suggestion. 

I'm not on Facebook. And for me, the thrift store is more convenient than trying to connect with individuals.

I have all I need right now anyway!


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## Della (Dec 28, 2022)

That article was a wake up call for me.  We pride ourselves on being clutter free, no attic, no basement, our three car garage holds only three cars and no spare rooms used for "storage."  It's use it or lose it here. 

 But, by golly I realized we did have a huge heavy set of fine china we hadn't used since my family no longer can gather for holiday dinners.  It was all on the very top shelf in the kitchen where I'm surprised the shelf hadn't collapsed and sent it all down on my head and the glass stove top.  So my husband took it all to the free store where the homeless patrons can now eat off fine china as well as sleep under our $300 gold brocade comforter that was too heavy for us and wear all the brand new but itchy sweaters I've donated.  Somewhere, under a bridge, some elegant living is going on.

I keep all the crystal, though.  Our living room is decorated in a yin-yang of crystal accents and leather upholstery.  I've always liked the clean sparkle of crystal under the light, so when my parents and sister-in-law and her great aunt downsized it all funneled to me.  If my son wants to throw it out when he inherits this place, that's fine with me.


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## Buckeye (Dec 28, 2022)

What your children, grand children, etc will gladly take is your cash, bank account/investment account balance, and anything else that can be easily converted to $$$. 

Can't say that I blame them.


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## ManjaroKDE (Dec 28, 2022)

After reading the posts on this thread my wife & I took stock of our 'stuff'.  Wife's hobbies are gardening, reading & puzzles.  Mine are computer related & movies.  With the cloud now a big part of our memories (photos & things) are online.  No storage containers taking up room in our shed or garage.  We told our children to let us know what they wanted so we don't donate or discard them.

Her books all come from her link to the public library, puzzles are bought online then donated intact after one use.  The gardening is taken care of weekly in the yard waste containers.  My hobby 'stuff' which used to take up 3-4 containers is down to an 8" container at the top of our closet.  All statements, taxes & other paper is online to the cloud.  My movies are copied to a 2TB external HD, no DVD cases on shelves.

We use one set of dishes & eating utensils, a few pots and pans, and a limited array of kitchen appliances.  I've gained a new respect for disposable bowls & cups.  The pandemic helped.  Other than a few needed blankets & weather appropriate clothing nothing is kept.  We adopted a minimalistic life style after retirement.


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## StarSong (Dec 28, 2022)

Della said:


> I keep all the crystal, though. Our living room is decorated in a yin-yang of crystal accents and leather upholstery. I've always liked the clean sparkle of crystal under the light,


I also love the clean sparkle of good crystal.  


Buckeye said:


> What your children, grand children, etc will gladly take is your cash, bank account/investment account balance, and anything else that can be easily converted to $$$.


When my mother died, the trust attorney told me that as the executor I should get rid of everything through an auction house or other means.  I disagreed, saying my siblings and the younger generation would want most of what she had.  He told me he'd seen this played out dozens of times with other estates.  Heirs want money, not stuff.

I went against his advice.

Not only was almost everything spoken for, the recipients paid the shipping charges (including for a 50+ year old grand piano that wasn't particularly valuable in and of itself.) Some other furniture was distributed among local family; the rest was donated.

The attorney was shocked when I reported how much had not only been requested, but paid to be shipped.

It's true that people are happy to inherit money, but you'd be surprised how often I hear from relatives that they love having little reminders of my mother populating their homes. A nephew used one of Mom's small crystal bowls to hold his babies' pacifiers, a small link from them to their great grandmother.


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## Pepper (Dec 28, 2022)

I'm putting my dil's father in charge of my LP collection, as he understands the value of some of them; also will put him in charge of my Beatles, etc. paraphernalia and comic books.  I think he would go for top dollar or find someone appreciative.


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