# Senior Over Fifty Perks of Life



## SeaBreeze (Nov 10, 2014)

Your supply of brain cells is finally down to manageable size.

Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can't remember them either.

Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the national weather service.

Kidnappers are not very interested in you.

In a hostage situation you are likely to be released first.

No one expects you to run--anywhere. 

People call at 9 pm and ask, "Did I wake you?"

People no longer view you as a hypochondriac.

There is nothing left to learn the hard way.

Things you buy now won't wear out.

You think humor must be good for your body, exercise and diets haven't worked well.

You can eat dinner at 4 P.M.

You can live without sex but not without glasses.

You enjoy hearing about other peoples operations.

You get into heated arguments about pension plans.

You have a party and the neighbors don't even realize it.

You no longer think of speed limits as a challenge.

You quit trying to hold your stomach in, no matter who walks into the room.

You sing along with elevator music.

Your eyes won't get much worse.

Your investment in health insurance is finally beginning to pay off.

You know more about prescription drugs than you pharmacist

My memory's not as sharp as it used to be. Also, my memory's not as sharp as it used to be.

Know how to prevent sagging? Just eat till the wrinkles fill out.

It's scary when you start making the same noises as your coffeemaker.

These days about half the stuff in my shopping cart says, "For fast relief."



Remember: You don't stop laughing because you grow old, You grow old because you stop laughing.


THE SENILITY PRAYER: Grant me the senility to forget the people I never liked anyway, the good fortune to run into the ones I do, and the eyesight to tell the difference.


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## Pappy (Nov 11, 2014)

I'll just add a little to it, SB.


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## jujube (Nov 11, 2014)

Well, at least I'm too old to die young.....


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## Lyn (Nov 11, 2014)

Purfect way to end a day with laughs, good going, and thanks.:hatlaugh:


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## jujube (Nov 12, 2014)

Quoting from a birthday card I just received:

With age comes wisdom.
With wisdom comes respect.
With respect comes honor.
And with the Senior Deal at Denny's comes two biscuits and a bottomless cup of decaf for $1.99.

That's the one that REALLY matters.


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## Meanderer (Nov 14, 2014)

They saythat when a man reaches 50....he is only half a buck!


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## Meanderer (Apr 1, 2021)

You become able to dress yourself...with abandon!


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## horseless carriage (Apr 2, 2021)

Meanderer said:


> You become able to dress yourself...with abandon!



Dress with abandon? Well excuse me!


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## SetWave (Apr 2, 2021)

Quite a few years ago I was paying for a car wash when I noticed a sign announcing the Senior Discount. Suddenly I realized it applied to me. Yay!  Printed out the receipt and proudly displayed it on the wall in my office.


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## Aunt Marg (Apr 2, 2021)

horseless carriage said:


> View attachment 157949
> Dress with abandon? Well excuse me!


Looking classy as ever, Horseless!


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## timoc (Apr 2, 2021)

Senior Over Fifty Perks of Life​_For men like me it's the simple things like going for a pint with some mates._

_Two blokes I know were in the pub having this conversation._


"Rumour has it, Fred, you and Rosie are getting hitched."

"Not any more, Sam, I found out a few things about Rosie, it seems that she's been married before, twice", said Fred, "The first husband died after eating poison mushrooms."

"What did the second husband die of, Fred?"

"He died with a fractured skull", said Fred.

"How did he get the fractured skull", asked Sam?

"He refused to eat the mushrooms."


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## horseless carriage (Apr 2, 2021)

Aunt Marg said:


> Looking classy as ever, Horseless!


Thank you Marg, you should see the suit that I had made to wear to an Hawaiian themed wedding.


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## tbeltrans (Apr 2, 2021)

There IS a song in this, once again. Take your pick...






or






Tony


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## horseless carriage (Apr 2, 2021)

Did you know that "My Way" is a song popularised by Frank Sinatra and written by Paul Anka, is set to the music of the French song "Comme d'habitude" composed and written by French songwriters Claude François and Jacques Revaux, and performed in 1967 by Claude François?


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## tbeltrans (Apr 2, 2021)

horseless carriage said:


> Did you know that "My Way" is a song popularised by Frank Sinatra and written by Paul Anka, is set to the music of the French song "Comme d'habitude" composed and written by French songwriters Claude François and Jacques Revaux, and performed in 1967 by Claude François?


I knew the first part, but not the French Connection (see what I did there?   ).

Edit: According to google translate, "Comme d'habitude" translates to "as usual" or "as a rule".

If that is true, then Paul Anka must have gotten permission to use the melody for his words.  Chord progressions are not protected, but melodies are, at least in the US though I am not sure about international copyright law.

The term, at least in the jazz world where song-specific chord progressions are often used in multiple tunes, is "contrafact":

A new musical composition built out of an already existing one, most often a new melody overlaid on a familiar harmonic structure. An important part of the development of bebop. Contrafacts are not to be confused with musical quotations, which comprise borrowing rhythms or melodies from an existing composition.  [from Wiktionary]

Tony


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## Aunt Marg (Apr 2, 2021)

horseless carriage said:


> Thank you Marg, you should see the suit that I had made to wear to an Hawaiian themed wedding.


So long as it was made for you, Horseless, I just know it would be classy.


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