# High heels? At my age?



## BlissfullyUnawareCanadian (Jan 14, 2021)

I am a tall, large (2x) woman that loves to dress up. I always wear dresses but have trouble finding “sexy” or at least fancy enough heels to wear with fancier dresses. I can wear high heeled boots with my dresses in the winter, but when I’m at a fancy dinner it’s nice to have some sexy strappy shoes to go with my pretty dress.

I have rarely been able to walk in heels, and find as I get older it’s more difficult, especially with extra weight on me.

I’m also in Canada, where we don’t have as large a selection to choose from as in the States. I can likely find what I need online but shipping and returns can be a royal pain.

Have any ladies here found suitable, comfortable heels to wear with dresses?


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## Devi (Jan 14, 2021)

Do "comfortable heels" even exist, unless the heels are very short ... and then they're not really "high heels" and not what might be considered sexy. IMO


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## Tish (Jan 14, 2021)

I have but I'm in Australia, so once again you would be stuck with shipping and returns.  
What about a nice wedge heel.


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## Kathleen’s Place (Jan 15, 2021)

I can barely walk in tennis shoes much less high heels  anymore . Those days for me have come and gone. But good luck with your search...hope someone on here can help you


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## hollydolly (Jan 15, 2021)

Oh no. I always wished I was tall so  I didn't need to wear high heels.. but that said HH give the leg a slimmer look when wearing a nice dress.. but you only need to have a little heel with a pretty shoe.. maybe an inch and a half or 2 inches would be plenty as long as the shoe is pretty. Try looking for dance sandals.. they tend to be very pretty but with smaller heels...


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## Ceege (Jan 15, 2021)

High heels just _kill_ my little toes.  I don't even own a pair of high heels, anymore.  And,  living a good life without them.  I don't mind wearing a dressy flat to an event.  My comfort means more to me than what someone else thinks of my choice of shoes. 
https://www.google.com/search?q=dre...mg&ei=A4sBYIaGDJDuswWN25-IAQ&bih=750&biw=1131


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## Jeweltea (Jan 15, 2021)

Ballroom dance shoes work. You can get any heel height you like in any color you like. Plus they are made differently and are much more comfortable than regular high heels.


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## hollydolly (Jan 15, 2021)

Jeweltea said:


> Ballroom dance shoes work. You can get any heel height you like in any color you like. Plus they are made differently and are much more comfortable than regular high heels.


LOL..I just said that up there ^^^^^^


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## Mr. Ed (Jan 15, 2021)

I sure wish platform shoes would come back?


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## horseless carriage (Jan 15, 2021)

hollydolly said:


> LOL..I just said that up there ^^^^^^


Ballroom shoes have one drawback, they are designed for the ballroom floor. The soles are made of a compressed composite that allows the dancers to slide easily across the ballroom floor. Step outside in those shoes and the soles won't last long and if it's wet, they won't last more than a few minutes. That's why, if you have ever seen dancers going to their dance class or other function, they carry a small pouch like bag. It contains their dance shoes.

All is not lost however. There are dance shoes that can be worn in the street, further more, if traditional high heels are a problem, you might consider the more solid Cuban heel. You can still look "sexy" in that type of heel. There are so many variations, see here: https://duckduckgo.com/?q=image+of+ladies+cuban+heel+dance+shoes&t=crhs&iax=images&ia=images


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## hollydolly (Jan 15, 2021)

horseless carriage said:


> Ballroom shoes have one drawback, they are designed for the ballroom floor. The soles are made of a compressed composite that allows the dancers to slide easily across the ballroom floor. Step outside in those shoes and the soles won't last long and if it's wet, they won't last more than a few minutes. That's why, if you have ever seen dancers going to their dance class or other function, they carry a small pouch like bag. It contains their dance shoes.
> 
> All is not lost however. There are dance shoes that can be worn in the street, further more, if traditional high heels are a problem, you might consider the more solid Cuban heel. You can still look "sexy" in that type of heel. There are so many variations, see here: https://duckduckgo.com/?q=image+of+ladies+cuban+heel+dance+shoes&t=crhs&iax=images&ia=images


yes I know that.. I was actually referring to 'dance shoes' in the sense of shoes you would choose to go dancing in for fun, rather than professional 'dance shoes'... but yes a good point made for anyone who didn't realise that specialist dance shoes are not for normal wear


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## Jeweltea (Jan 15, 2021)

hollydolly said:


> LOL..I just said that up there ^^^^^^


Sorry...didn't know for sure what dance sandals were...lol.


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## Jeweltea (Jan 15, 2021)

Some places sell dance shoes with soles you can wear outside. Just saw that someone posted a link to some above.


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## BlissfullyUnawareCanadian (Jan 15, 2021)

horseless carriage said:


> Ballroom shoes have one drawback, they are designed for the ballroom floor. The soles are made of a compressed composite that allows the dancers to slide easily across the ballroom floor. Step outside in those shoes and the soles won't last long and if it's wet, they won't last more than a few minutes. That's why, if you have ever seen dancers going to their dance class or other function, they carry a small pouch like bag. It contains their dance shoes.
> 
> All is not lost however. There are dance shoes that can be worn in the street, further more, if traditional high heels are a problem, you might consider the more solid Cuban heel. You can still look "sexy" in that type of heel. There are so many variations, see here: https://duckduckgo.com/?q=image+of+ladies+cuban+heel+dance+shoes&t=crhs&iax=images&ia=images


Oh some of these, especially the ones with straps and bling are very sexy, totally suitable for wearing with a formal dress. And the heels look manageable, thank you! Now to find a shoe that fits my wide, oddly shaped feet!


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## MarciKS (Jan 15, 2021)

I have never been comfortable in heels because I have very bad feet. The heels make them hurt more. I wore them some when I was younger then switched to flats. They have dressier flats now I think.


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## jujube (Jan 15, 2021)

These days, high heels would be a guaranteed trip to the ER for x-rays and probably a cast.  But, ooh, I do miss how good they made my legs look.....


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## horseless carriage (Jan 15, 2021)

hollydolly said:


> yes I know that.. I was actually referring to 'dance shoes' in the sense of shoes you would choose to go dancing in for fun, rather than professional 'dance shoes'... but yes a good point made for anyone who didn't realise that specialist dance shoes are not for normal wear


Re-reading my post Holly, perhaps I came across a tad too assertive, A bit of a know all because I can dance. Forums are new to me, slowly but surely I am beginning to realise that how I write something is just as important as what I write. We can only communicate by the written word, all the other ways we communicate when face to face are lost. The body language, eye contact, minute nuance, none of that we can see. I will be more careful in future.


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## hollydolly (Jan 15, 2021)

horseless carriage said:


> Re-reading my post Holly, perhaps I came across a tad too assertive, A bit of a know all because I can dance. Forums are new to me, slowly but surely I am beginning to realise that how I write something is just as important as what I write. We can only communicate by the written word, all the other ways we communicate when face to face are lost. The body language, eye contact, minute nuance, none of that we can see. I will be more careful in future.


Oh please don't misunderstand me, I wasn't taking you to task, but yes I agree totally, it's my mantra on here and always has been that misunderstandings and offence are easily taken because of the lack of nuance etc.. which is why I feel the use of emoticons make a huge difference  in the way a post is read by the reader .. or recipient..


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## MarciKS (Jan 15, 2021)

Apparently LOL doesn't work as well as


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## Pinky (Jan 16, 2021)

@BlissfullyUnawareCanadian .. I've always found comfortable heels at Naturalizer. They have a good variety of heel heights. I've donated most of my high heel shoes, but still have a pair or two (just in case), but have a few higher fancy wedge heels.


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## Giants fan1954 (Jan 17, 2021)

Good luck! I'm a deer in the headlights in heels...can't move,can't walk,I used to hang onto my hubby like a titanic survivor with a life jacket!!!!!
2 sons wedding dance pics,Mom is barefoot!
I'm one of those people that can fall over air,its a talent,not everyone has


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## Phoenix (Jan 17, 2021)

There was a time in my life when I liked to strut it and show it all off.  That's when I wore high heels and hung out my boobs.  Now I think, why would I want to do that?  I also got rid of my dresses.  I am comfortable where ever I am and what ever I'm doing.  I stopped hanging it out when I was 40, and it still all looked good at that time.  Women dress this way for a variety of reason.  For me it is was a matter of outgrowing the need to have someone lust after me.  Now, before I'm misunderstood for this, these are my thoughts about me.  I am not applying them to anyone else.


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## Keesha (Jan 17, 2021)

Here are a few good shoe places to try

https://www.thebay.com/c/women/womens-shoes

https://www.canadianfootwear.com/

DSW has a large selection of low pumps and a variety of different heights of heels. Just make sure to click on the section you want. They are good with returns also.

https://www.dsw.ca/en/ca/category/w...Z1z14169Z1z141yz?b=hb_all_w_shoes_pumps_heels

I’ve got  3 pairs of boots with a bit of a heel. One pair are dress boots and then I have one pair of white low heeled pumps for summer dresses. That’s it.

It’s a rare occasion that I want to wear heels; weddings, funnels and / or special musical events etc., Besides which, when I wear them,  I’m towering over my man and while he says he doesn’t mind, I think he’s merely being kind.


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## BlissfullyUnawareCanadian (Jan 18, 2021)

Keesha said:


> Here are a few good shoe places to try
> 
> https://www.thebay.com/c/women/womens-shoes
> 
> ...


Oh I love a pair of dress open toed heels on that site!

https://www.dsw.ca/en/ca/product/kelly-and-katie-marnee-sandal/117881466?width=Wide

I think they will look great with my semi formal dresses!


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## Keesha (Jan 18, 2021)

BlissfullyUnawareCanadian said:


> Oh I love a pair of dress open toed heels on that site!
> 
> https://www.dsw.ca/en/ca/product/kelly-and-katie-marnee-sandal/117881466?width=Wide
> 
> I think they will look great with my semi formal dresses!


Yep! They’re classy and a great price too. Plus the champagne colour goes with almost anything. Good choice.


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## Glowworm (Feb 27, 2021)

I love looking at all kinds of pretty shoes but obviously they're not part of my wardrobe.


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## Pinky (Feb 27, 2021)

Glowworm said:


> I love looking at all kinds of pretty shoes but obviously they're not part of my wardrobe.


Love your sense of humour


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## dobielvr (Feb 27, 2021)

horseless carriage said:


> Re-reading my post Holly, perhaps I came across a tad too assertive, A bit of a know all because I can dance. Forums are new to me, slowly but surely I am beginning to realise that how I write something is just as important as what I write. We can only communicate by the written word, all the other ways we communicate when face to face are lost. The body language, eye contact, minute nuance, none of that we can see. I will be more careful in future.


Your post was fine, I didn't read it as assertive at all.

We're all pretty easy going around here...no reason to fret over the small stuff.


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## hollydolly (Feb 27, 2021)

I still have a few pairs of high heel shoes, although aside from an inch and a half or so on sandals, I really can't tell you the last time I wore shoes with high heels. OTOH I do more occasionally wear High heel boots...  both ankle and knee length..


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## Ceege (Feb 27, 2021)

Have you ever noticed on a TV show, women walking across the set or stage wearing high heels, can't even stand up straight as they walk?  It's not really an attractive look.  Now a short heel or flats gives them the ability to actually stand up straight as they walk.


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## BlissfullyUnawareCanadian (Feb 27, 2021)

I did smile at first at the video but then thought "did someone really record someone having trouble walking and posted it on youtube?" I find that really distasteful. I'm ashamed for having smiled at it in jest. I have trouble walking sometimes and would hate for someone to record me and post it on the internet, regardless if they thought they knew the reason. I'm almost positive it is the heels, but who am I to judge?  Maybe that girl could only afford cheap heels that are difficult to walk in. Maybe she is a sex trade worker on her way to a job and she does that for a living because she was abused as a child and has low self esteem, or is a sex traffic victim.  I worked in police services for years and can tell you sex trafficking happens a LOT more than most people know. Some may say my questions why she may be doing it are off the wall, but my point is, who knows the reasons. Not us. This video sort of reminds me of the time I saw a photo on the internet of someone who had taken a picture of an older womans wrinkled bottom in the gym change room and posted it on the internet with a rude comment. I remember thinking "oh great, that could easily be my bum and there some jerk is, taking a photo of someone's body and shaming them".  We never know a persons reason for walking the way they do, even if we are positive we know the reason.


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## Lewkat (Feb 27, 2021)

horseless carriage said:


> Ballroom shoes have one drawback, they are designed for the ballroom floor. The soles are made of a compressed composite that allows the dancers to slide easily across the ballroom floor. Step outside in those shoes and the soles won't last long and if it's wet, they won't last more than a few minutes. That's why, if you have ever seen dancers going to their dance class or other function, they carry a small pouch like bag. It contains their dance shoes.
> 
> All is not lost however. There are dance shoes that can be worn in the street, further more, if traditional high heels are a problem, you might consider the more solid Cuban heel. You can still look "sexy" in that type of heel. There are so many variations, see here: https://duckduckgo.com/?q=image+of+ladies+cuban+heel+dance+shoes&t=crhs&iax=images&ia=images


Just looked at some of  those and a few are very lovely indeed.  I may just go back to wearing a heel on occasion.


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## Ruthanne (Feb 27, 2021)

Only short high heels for me now as my days higher heels have come and gone.  And I only wear the shorter higher heels at special occasions cuz they hurt my feet.


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## debrakay (Feb 27, 2021)

Phoenix said:


> There was a time in my life when I liked to strut it and show it all off.  That's when I wore high heels and hung out my boobs.  Now I think, why would I want to do that?  I also got rid of my dresses.  I am comfortable where ever I am and what ever I'm doing.  I stopped hanging it out when I was 40, and it still all looked good at that time.  Women dress this way for a variety of reason.  For me it is was a matter of outgrowing the need to have someone lust after me.  Now, before I'm misunderstood for this, these are my thoughts about me.  I am not applying them to anyone else.


It must be us Oregon girls because when I turned 50 I could have cared less to "dress to impress" anyone other than my husband.  I still see women in their 80's trying to look 40 and wonder why.  My idea of "high heels" these days are about a 1 inch heal but flats are my favorites!


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## debrakay (Feb 27, 2021)

BlissfullyUnawareCanadian said:


> I am a tall, large (2x) woman that loves to dress up. I always wear dresses but have trouble finding “sexy” or at least fancy enough heels to wear with fancier dresses. I can wear high heeled boots with my dresses in the winter, but when I’m at a fancy dinner it’s nice to have some sexy strappy shoes to go with my pretty dress.
> 
> I have rarely been able to walk in heels, and find as I get older it’s more difficult, especially with extra weight on me.
> 
> ...


At my age "high heels" have the same draw as "bikini". Ain't happening.


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## debrakay (Feb 27, 2021)

Glowworm said:


> I love looking at all kinds of pretty shoes but obviously they're not part of my wardrobe.


Neither is a bikini for me!


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## Lewkat (Feb 27, 2021)

Nor I.  I never wore one.  Always a one piece suit which I usually bought from Jantzen.


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## officerripley (Feb 27, 2021)

I guess it's probably a scientific fact that wearing high heels can make a woman's legs look slimmer and if she's wanting to attract someone, that might work. But why the heck then don't we make men wear high heels too?! Why don't they have to have better looking legs? (And actually I think men were the first to wear 'em anyway, in France back in the 18th cent.)


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## dobielvr (Feb 27, 2021)

hollydolly said:


> I still have a few pairs of high heel shoes, although aside from an inch and a half or so on sandals, I really can't tell you the last time I wore shoes with high heels. OTOH I do more occasionally wear High heel boots...  both ankle and knee length..


You're such a dolly ..holly.


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## hollydolly (Feb 27, 2021)

dobielvr said:


> You're such a dolly ..holly.


Thank you muchly....


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