# Learn something every day?



## Bretrick (Dec 4, 2021)

I remember reading my birth certificate a few years ago.
I was born March 1962.
My parents were married May 1962. 2 months after I was born.
Plus they had 5 children before I came along.
With two children deceased before I was born
Why did it take me so long to realise this?
I must have read this document at least a dozen times before I understood what was written.


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## dseag2 (Dec 4, 2021)

Yes, my father majored in music and had a record collection with old show tunes.  When he went to college, he roomed with another young man in a house that was owned by a "confirmed bachelor".  He took my mother and me back to visit.

He was 30 y/o and established in business when he met my mother, who was 20 y/o.  I was their only child.  I didn't think anything about it any of this because he was a successful businessman who lived for his career.  

When he passed away, my mother told me he was gay.


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## mrstime (Dec 4, 2021)

Bretrick said:


> I remember reading my birth certificate a few years ago.
> I was born March 1962.
> My parents were married May 1962. 2 months after I was born.
> Plus they had 5 children before I came along.
> ...


Yikes you are younger than my youngest child!


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## SeaBreeze (Dec 4, 2021)

Bretrick said:


> I remember reading my birth certificate a few years ago.
> I was born March 1962.
> My parents were married May 1962. 2 months after I was born.
> Plus they had 5 children before I came along.
> ...


I can't remember the last time I looked at my birth certificate, I didn't think there was very much information on it.  Funny how we can be just made aware of such things so late in life.


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## SeaBreeze (Dec 4, 2021)

dseag2 said:


> Yes, my father majored in music and had a record collection with old show tunes.  When he went to college, he roomed with another young man in a house that was owned by a "confirmed bachelor".  He took my mother and me back to visit.
> 
> He was 30 y/o and established in business when he met my mother, who was 20 y/o.  I was their only child.  I didn't think anything about it any of this because he was a successful businessman who lived for his career.
> 
> When he passed away, my mother told me he was gay.


Too bad she had to wait until he passed before telling you about him.  He likely requested her silence and she complied.


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## dseag2 (Dec 5, 2021)

SeaBreeze said:


> Too bad she had to wait until he passed before telling you about him.  He likely requested her silence and she complied.


Well, she always called him the "flower of the musical world" when I was a child.  I just didn't know what that meant.  He was always a good, caring, provider for us.  When I came out, we had a very reasonable conversation.  He told me that it was a difficult life but he would support me in whatever I decided.  I should have known then, but I was so naive.

My mother, on the other hand, thought she had totally failed in raising me and insisted I go to a psychologist.  (She denied it up to her dying day.)  The psychologist told me I was just fine.  She still couldn't accept it, and when I broke up with partner of 6 years at the age of 30 she said "now you can marry a woman".

When my father died in 2000, I was continually hit with fits of crying for months.  When my mother passed away last month I cried when we cleaned out her apartment, but I have not cried since.


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## SeaBreeze (Dec 5, 2021)

dseag2 said:


> Well, she always called him the "flower of the musical world" when I was a child.  I just didn't know what that meant.  He was always a good, caring, provider for us.  When I came out, we had a very reasonable conversation.  He told me that it was a difficult life but he would support me in whatever I decided.  I should have known then, but I was so naive.
> 
> My mother, on the other hand, thought she had totally failed in raising me and insisted I go to a psychologist.  (She denied it up to her dying day.)  The psychologist told me I was just fine.  She still couldn't accept it, and when I broke up with partner of 6 years at the age of 30 she said "now you can marry a woman".
> 
> When my father died in 2000, I was continually hit with fits of crying for months.  When my mother passed away last month I cried when we cleaned out her apartment, but I have not cried since.


I'm glad your father supported you.  It's unfortunate your mother didn't, but I think they raised a fine man and a good person.  My sympathy for the loss of both of them.


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## WheatenLover (Dec 5, 2021)

Bretrick said:


> I remember reading my birth certificate a few years ago.
> I was born March 1962.
> My parents were married May 1962. 2 months after I was born.
> Plus they had 5 children before I came along.
> ...


If your parents had 6 children, and 2 died, do you know the other 3?

My parents were married 6 months before I, a full-term baby, was born. I don't know why she never told me. I found out when my mother's psychopath best friend told me. She told me to look at mom's wedding ring, and sure enough, the date engraved on it was 6 months before my birthday. Totally by accident, I got married to my husband on the same date. This was because the judge wanted to go fishing on the actual date, so we accommodated him.


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## Bretrick (Dec 5, 2021)

WheatenLover said:


> If your parents had 6 children, and 2 died, do you know the other 3?
> 
> My parents were married 6 months before I, a full-term baby, was born. I don't know why she never told me. I found out when my mother's psychopath best friend told me. She told me to look at mom's wedding ring, and sure enough, the date engraved on it was 6 months before my birthday. Totally by accident, I got married to my husband on the same date. This was because the judge wanted to go fishing on the actual date, so we accommodated him.


My mother had 7 children. One more after me.
We all lived together until my eldest brother left when I was 14, (my mother left when I was 7) then my sister left the next year, my brother, one year my senior left, my younger brother left.
They all fled Tasmania to as far away as they to go, though still in Australia.
I stayed to look after my Grandmother until she went to live with her Daughter, who lodged her in a nursing home.
I left Tasmania after my Father died.


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## WheatenLover (Dec 6, 2021)

Bretrick said:


> My mother had 7 children. One more after me.


I'm sorry my post sounded like a math problem. I wasn't saying "if" because I doubted you. I just think in math.

Also, I'm sorry I didn't make this a private message. Please forgive me if this bothered you. Sometimes I ask questions without thinking of the ramifications.


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## Bretrick (Dec 6, 2021)

WheatenLover said:


> I'm sorry my post sounded like a math problem. I wasn't saying "if" because I doubted you. I just think in math.
> 
> Also, I'm sorry I didn't make this a private message. Please forgive me if this bothered you. Sometimes I ask questions without thinking of the ramifications.


I am an open book. I worry not about what people know of me.
Relating my experiences allows others to contemplate their own lives and to offer their experience if they wish to.
Talking about things is very cathartic and many people who have never spoken of the lives can find solace in using forums.


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## WheatenLover (Dec 6, 2021)

Bretrick said:


> I am an open book. I worry not about what people know of me.


Well, thank you for your openness and your graciousness.


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## Fyrefox (Dec 8, 2021)

My father had a sister who died before he was born.  His mother was a “Christian Scientist” who didn’t believe in medical treatment, so that sibling was tragically allowed to succumb to appendicitis.  I didn’t learn of the existence of my aunt until my father mentioned her to my sister late in his life.  “Grace” died young and unnecessarily and I could never know her, but my life was made richer by knowing of her existence…


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## Sliverfox (Dec 8, 2021)

I never knew much about  my parental  grandfather's wife's family.
Early this year I got a phone call,, asking if my  grandmother  was ??

Yes,she was,,never knew her as she died young.
Turns out  this lady's grandmother was  my granny's sister.

She is trying learn why her  grandmother left PA, and more  about  that side of the family.


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## officerripley (Dec 8, 2021)

I didn't find out 'till about 6 years before my Mom died (at the age of 89) that she had had a son about 7 or 8 years after she had me (I thought I was the youngest). Turns out after she and Dad split up that her boyfriend had gotten her pregnant, he didn't want to get married unless she signed a pre-nup agreement (because he owned an old 12 foot fishing boat), she wisely didn't marry him (he was a non-recovering alcoholic) and gave my half-brother up for adoption. So I've got a half-brother out there somewhere.


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