# Living Will and regular will



## Sue777 (Feb 18, 2019)

Sorry, not sure what category to post this question in so moderators - please feel free to move it.    

I've yet to make out a will but think I should probably put that near the top of my "To Do" list when I am finally done working.  While I'm at it, I should do a Living Will so I don't put the burden of decisions on my husband and kids.   

Rather than hiring a lawyer, I'm guessing this is something I can do primarily online, and then probably have it notarized and filed somewhere?    

Anyone have suggestions of a reputable online tool for creating and completing these types of things?
Sue


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## Sue777 (Feb 20, 2019)

Wow, a little surprised at the lack of responses.... wondering if that means most of us don't have one, or most of you had an attorney prepare these for you?
Sue


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## C'est Moi (Feb 20, 2019)

We had an attorney draw up our wills.


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## applecruncher (Feb 20, 2019)

I also used an attorney. You should have a Will, and not put it off until after you retire. Many people pass away prior to retirement.

As far as Iack of replies, you really shouldn't make assumptions. Could be some simply don't care to respond.


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## Sue777 (Feb 20, 2019)

Thanks for the replies.     Hopefully I won't die before I retire because I'm done working next week!    

Didn't think I assumed anything, but sorry if you found my post somehow rude or offensive.


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## applecruncher (Feb 20, 2019)

Sue777 said:


> Thanks for the replies.     Hopefully I won't die before I retire because I'm done working next week!
> 
> Didn't think I assumed anything, but sorry if you found my post somehow rude or offensive.



:laugh:

Yeah.  Well, good luck.


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## Butterfly (Feb 21, 2019)

Hey, Sue -- Be aware before you use any of those online sites that law regarding wills and estates and probate and such are ALL different from state to state.  SO, a will that is prepared according to the laws of one state might completely miss the mark for another state.  So if you do decide to use one of those, make sure it is a format that conforms to the state you live in and that it is notarized, signed and or filed (if necessary) in accordance with your state's laws, or it might not be considered valid.

I'd recommend consulting with an attorney  -- there are a lot of hidden potholes in wills.


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## Tommy (Feb 21, 2019)

After we moved from Maine to New Hampshire we discovered that here, in addition to the usual wills, POAs, advance directives, and such, it's wise to create a trust.  NH laws are such that even a modest estate can take years to pass through probate and it can be a real headache.  Having a revocable trust totally sidesteps all of that.  Find out what is appropriate for your state.


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## Aunt Bea (Feb 21, 2019)

IMHO it really depends on your situation.

If you have limited financial assets it may be as easy as naming a beneficiary or POD designation to your accounts with a simple will to transfer your personal belongings to your spouse and children.

The same with a living will, in this area the doctor can provide a basic form that documents your wishes.

The more you have the more complicated the process becomes.  

If you and your husband have a solid relationship I would encourage you to do this together and cover the various bases of who dies first, what if you die together, etc... and that will probably require a face to face with a good attorney that specializes in estate planning.

Good luck.


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## Sue777 (Feb 21, 2019)

Thanks, everyone, for the replies and suggestions.  We have become (or at least I have) such an internet/Google world that I assume everything can be done online.    But you're right - this is the type of thing that would best be handled by a professional in my area that knows the laws and possible loopholes.   

I'm sure mine will be simple:   I just want to pass on whatever assets I have to be divided or delegated to husband and two grown children, and to have one of them carry out my wishes should I be in a vegetative state.  It would probably only require one attorney visit, and would be worth the money to have it done right.

I'm familiar with the notary laws in my state (because I am a notary) and know that I can't notarize my own signature - bummer!   Ya think if I could convince them that I have schizophrenic tendencies they would let me do my own?  
Sue


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## Butterfly (Feb 21, 2019)

Sue, it's not just the notary laws (I'm a notary, too)-- for wills in some states including mine, there are specific requirements about the manner in which the will is signed (by that I mean the number of witnesses, the required affirmations and statements, etc.)

Consult an attorney -- in the case of my parents, they both died without a will (after consultation with attorneys) and the transition of their property went just as they wished and the hassle and expense of probate was avoided.  I've arranged my affairs so that I can do the same -- with a transfer on death deed to my real property and transfer on death beneficiaries to my various bank accounts, investment accounts, etc., so that when I die, all my son needs to do is file a death certificate and --boom -- all my stuff becomes his stuff.   Not all states offer these options.


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## SeaBreeze (Feb 21, 2019)

We had a will and a living will prepared decades ago by a lawyer.  We really need to make new ones, but I agree with the others, better to spend the money and have a good local lawyer prepare the wills for you rather than attempting to do such an important thing online.


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## Sue777 (Feb 21, 2019)

Points well taken.    It would be a shame to THINK I had left my survivors prepared only to leave them with a worse mess due to not having the documents done properly.    I will ask friends for references to lawyers in the area who do this type of work.   Thanks again for the feedback.
Sue


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## applecruncher (Feb 21, 2019)

As Butterfly mentioned, the TOD transfer upon death assignments are very important. Otherwise those assets and accounts stay locked and have to go thru probate.


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## Lethe200 (Feb 22, 2019)

The best on-line estate tools and research articles are from Nolo Press, which specializes in this area. BUT: those here who are pointing out state laws are not consistent from one to the other, are entirely and completely correct. State law guidelines MUST be followed or you invite trouble. 

Never expect multiple heirs to "play nice" with one another. If your estate is over $50K plus OR involves RE ownership, especially joint, you need a will and other attendant documents. $50K is not a magic #, btw - it's merely most states and the IRS don't care about small estates with modest net worth.

Anyone who has IRAs or 401k retirement accounts should discuss with their tax advisor how to have the heirs aware that very specific IRS guidelines need to be followed or they will be in a world of tax pain - and the IRS doesn't let you 'backtrack' a mistake unless you correct it within hours.

Living Wills have been superseded by what is called the Healthcare Power of Attorney doc. It should be discussed with your doctor, who signs it, and keeps a copy. You need a signed copy for your records as well. Whoever is your Agent _*AND *_Successor Agent should also have a copy. This is because of the HIPAA (Privacy) law. If you are in an accident and land in the hospital unable to verbally and coherently express your wishes, the medical staff must have that HPoA on record to speak to your Agent or Successor Agent. 

Yes, if you're in a small town and "everybody knows everybody else", this can be discreetly ignored - but medical staff have been sued for violating the HIPAA law, so better safe than sorry.

Be aware that in regards to wills, state law can be very specific about who inherits if you die intestate (without will or trust), and therefore if your will disinherits any of those people, it can be challenged. For example, a house may be in your name entirely. Try to pass it on to your children, bypassing your spouse by assuming a verbal agreement to remain until spouse's death or move-out - but it can be legally challenged in states where the spouse is automatically assumed to have a share from one-third to one-half of a person's estate.

Best to have an estate attorney's advice for your will. The Healthcare PoA is a standard form and Nolo (and other websites) have state-specific forms you can download.

Always remember any time one of your Agents or Heirs passes away or cannot serve, to update your documents, too!


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## Sue777 (Feb 22, 2019)

Wow, thank you, Lethe!    Lots of great information!!!!!    I have a doctor's appointment on Wednesday anyway, I'll talk to her about getting a form.
Sue


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## Aneeda72 (Mar 5, 2019)

We used an attorney as well.  The living will was just a part of the whole will.  I set mine up so my DNR/DNI wishes could not be countermanded by a relative in a moment of weakness.  Lol. 

We have very little, and our kids would never fight over the bits and pieces.  It's the living will thing I wanted to be clear about.


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## retiredtraveler (Mar 5, 2019)

Do NOT get a 'regular' will. Get a revocable trust. That eliminats probate should anything happen to either of you. Probate can be time consuming, and costly. Totally avoidable with a revocable trust which an attorney can easily do for you.


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## Tommy (Mar 5, 2019)

Here, a couple of years ago, setting up a revocable trust ran around $2700.  Just a point of reverence.


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## Sue777 (Mar 5, 2019)

Tommy said:


> Here, a couple of years ago, setting up a revocable trust ran around $2700.  Just a point of reverence.



Ouch!    Didn't expect it to cost that much.
Sue


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## mathjak107 (Mar 6, 2019)

retiredtraveler said:


> Do NOT get a 'regular' will. Get a revocable trust. That eliminats probate should anything happen to either of you. Probate can be time consuming, and costly. Totally avoidable with a revocable trust which an attorney can easily do for you.


be careful though ..  putting a home in a revocable will unprotects the home if you need to utilize medicaid ...

the home in personal name does not have the equity count when applying for medicaid long term care ..it becomes a counted asset in a revocable trust and now has to be sold and the assets spent down to qualify .

that can be far worse then merely avoiding probate.

we try to avoid trusts as much as possible . everything we have is passed to heirs via simple beneficiary on accounts ... trusts can create all kinds of issues and we ran in to awful problems with them when they were missing verbiage.

trusts complicate things and fights in families are quite common as usually family members are trustees and end up being accused of misdeeds .


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## Tommy (Mar 6, 2019)

mathjak107 said:


> be careful though ..  putting a home in a revocable will unprotects the home if you need to utilize medicaid ...
> 
> the home in personal name does not have the equity count when applying for medicaid long term care ..it becomes a counted asset in a revocable trust and now has to be sold and the assets spent down to qualify .
> 
> that can be far worse then merely avoiding probate.


That's good to know, mathjak107.  Thank you.


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## OneEyedDiva (Mar 23, 2019)

"Thanks, everyone, for the replies and suggestions. We have become (or at least I have) such an internet/Google world that I assume everything can be done online. But you're right - this is the type of thing that would best be handled by a professional in my area that knows the laws and possible loopholes."  
Exactly! And a living will is very important. It absolves loved ones from having to make what might be very hard, heartbreaking decisions. 
I assume you are now retired so


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## Sue777 (Mar 23, 2019)

Thanks, Diva!    Yes and no on the retirement.   I stopped going into the office on February 28th but still text with many people throughout the day, I'm technically still employed by them for the next 9 weeks so I am available to offer suggestions and answer their questions, etc.   

But the few weeks since I haven't been going in?   I spent the first 7 days working my fingers to the bone remodeling a room (I was trying to get it all done while hubby was out of town) and then right after that it was time to pack my bags and fly cross country to spend some time with my daughter and two young grandchildren.   I just got back Tuesday and hubby has been home sick, and this morning I woke up with the sore throat and headache.   

So yes, even though I can't say it's been a relaxing, restful break from the office, at least I haven't set foot in the place for almost a month now.   And I LOVE not having an alarm clock set and a bed time to adhere to.    
Sue


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## OneEyedDiva (Mar 23, 2019)

You're welcome. Hope you and your husband get well soon.  This may just be a precursor to permanent retirement. LOL  Some people are busier in retirement than they were when they were working.  I was one of them, at least during the first few years. It's nice that you could take that trip. I know it must've been great to see your daughter and grandchildren. Not having to get up and go to work is GREAT!!!


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## Twilight (Mar 25, 2019)

Hi Sue777,
Here in Tucson, we have the Pima Council on Aging. Attorneys assist older adults twice a month with these kinds of things and it is only $15.00. You might check and see if they have something like that where you live. I don't think that would cover the acutal cost of the will though. It might be a place to get some help.


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## Butterfly (Mar 25, 2019)

As to Trusts, do be aware that you have to have a Trustee to manage such a trust.  If it's a bank or some such or an attorney, they will charge you (or your estate) a fee every year.  If it's a relative, friend, etc., you have to be sure (a) that they are absolutely trustworthy, and (b) that they know about managing trusts so they do not run afoul of the law and get the trust into trouble.  Our office managed a couple of trusts and IMHO it is a big fat pain in the rear.

A trust is NOT the end-all and be-all for managing an estate, particularly a modest estate, and can create more problems than it resolves.  Most people don't need a trust.  I would not even consider a trust unless I had a VERY large estate or had minor children or legally incompetent heirs.


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## old medic (Mar 26, 2019)

We drew up wills many years ago, and need to update them... kids are grown, all goes to the grandson, with daughter over it if hes before 18 if we both go....seen it happen.
Living wills/ DNR/ MOST form ([FONT=arial, sans-serif]Medical Orders for Scope of Treatment) .. Understand that in and emergency situation only the DNR/ MOST can be excepted by responders, AND needs to be present.
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[FONT=arial, sans-serif] [/FONT]


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## Ronni (Mar 26, 2019)

There are numerous online tools for creating wills, customized to your state.  Here's one of many links, just to give you an example.  

https://willing.com/online-wills?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=NB_GSN_Phrase_Desktop-Wills&utm_adgroup=wills&utm_term=will&utm_content=284043513312&device=c&network=g&placement=&matchtype=p&utm_expid=.IUwxD4OmTGi1xDaPDwv2zQ.0&utm_referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com%2F


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## mathjak107 (Mar 26, 2019)

Ronni said:


> There are numerous online tools for creating wills, customized to your state.  Here's one of many links, just to give you an example.
> 
> https://willing.com/online-wills?utm_source=google&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=NB_GSN_Phrase_Desktop-Wills&utm_adgroup=wills&utm_term=will&utm_content=284043513312&device=c&network=g&placement=&matchtype=p&utm_expid=.IUwxD4OmTGi1xDaPDwv2zQ.0&utm_referrer=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.google.com%2F



these can create so much grief for heirs if even one word is off ... states not only change things all the time but there are certain protocols estate attorneys perform in front of witnesses that can be very important ,especially in 2nd marriages..i don't recommend anyone do this stuff on their own despite how simple it appears on the outside ... there are no do overs when there is a verbiage or form issue


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