# How do you feel when you are thanked for your service?



## fuzzybuddy (Nov 13, 2022)

When someone says, "Thank you for your service", I feel uncomfortable. I spent 4 years as a Corpsman in the US Navy, and I'm proud of what I did. I was a good Corpsman. Yet, when I think of what other guys have done, and gave up............. I was never in danger, never missed a meal, never even slept on dirty sheets. Yeah, I understand we all did our part in a large military scheme, we all gave something. But I think the guys, who gave up their limbs and lives really are the men we owe a huge unrepayable debt. I think the "thanks" should go to those men. How do you feel when you are thanked for your service?


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## Right Now (Nov 13, 2022)

Every single person who served our country played, and still plays, an integral part in keeping us safe and our democracy strong.  Never doubt however small you believe your part was, it counts and should be acknowledged.


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## fuzzybuddy (Nov 13, 2022)

Right Now said:


> Every single person who served our country played, and still plays, an integral part in keeping us safe and our democracy strong.  Never doubt however small you believe your part was, it counts and should be acknowledged.


I understand the sentiment, and I am grateful for the thanks. But say, you've just had lifesaving surgery, who do you think deserves thanks more- your doctor, or the guy , who mopped the OR floor?


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## Right Now (Nov 13, 2022)

fuzzybuddy said:


> I understand the sentiment, and I am grateful for the thanks. But say, you've just had lifesaving surgery, who do you think deserves thanks more- your doctor, or the guy , who mopped the OR floor?


Both! The guy who mopped the OR floor keeps folks having surgery safer from bacteria and infections from germs.  If he wasn't doing job, the surgeon could have performed a perfect surgery, only to have the patient get a serious infection and perhaps die from it.    See?  Everyone involved counts.


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## IKE (Nov 13, 2022)

Not that I don't appreciate the thought but it makes me feel uncomfortable also......don't feel that I need a thank you for doing my job.

I just nod and say thank you back and go on about my business.


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## jimintoronto (Nov 13, 2022)

I served in the Canadian Forces, but no one outside of my family knows that because I don't wear any military items like a baseball cap or a lapel pin. Once a year on November the 11th, I attend the Remembrance Day service at our City Hall memorial. Military service in Canada is not the "big deal " that it  is in the USA. I cannot ever remember any Canadian running for public office here making mention that they were a military veteran, while in the USA is seems to be a standard part of their resume.   JimB.


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## Alligatorob (Nov 13, 2022)

fuzzybuddy said:


> When someone says, "Thank you for your service", I feel uncomfortable. I spent 4 years as a Corpsman in the US Navy, and I'm proud of what I did. I was a good Corpsman. Yet, when I think of what other guys have done, and gave up............. I was never in danger, never missed a meal, never even slept on dirty sheets. Yeah, I understand we all did our part in a large military scheme, we all gave something. But I think the guys, who gave up their limbs and lives really are the men we owe a huge unrepayable debt. I think the "thanks" should go to those men. How do you feel when you are thanked for your service?


Everyone who goes into the Military is signing on to the possibility of having to fight and die for us.  When I thank folks that is what I am thinking of.  

Not that those who actually faced combat are not different, they are and deserve special recognition.  However all, you included knowingly took that risk.  For us!


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## Nathan (Nov 13, 2022)

I feel a bit uncomfortable, after being villainized coming back from Vietnam now being "thanked" for that service just seems hollow.


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## ManjaroKDE (Nov 13, 2022)

I was in *USAFSS* so I had a non-combat role during Vietnam.  Every time I get a 'Thank You' I feel that I should explain.


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## Lewkat (Nov 13, 2022)

I am honored to be thanked, but I feel awkward when I am.  I don't think it's necessary to thank me for my service.  I feel it's an honor and a way of answering the question of, how can I help?  But it is a lovely gesture nonetheless.


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## Alligatorob (Nov 13, 2022)

IKE said:


> Not that I don't appreciate the thought but it makes me feel uncomfortable also......don't feel that I need a thank you for doing my job.


Good to know.  What, if anything, do you think folks should say?  @Nathan too.

For me it probably goes back to memories of the Vietnam era when many people took out their political views on the war on vets.  That was very wrong.  In my mind its an even higher level of commitment to give up or risk life and limb for some political cause you may or may not believe in.


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## DebraMae (Nov 13, 2022)




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## IKE (Nov 13, 2022)

Alligatorob said:


> Good to know.  What, if anything, do you think folks should say?  @Nathan too.


Saying nothing at all would suit me just fine Rob.


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## C50 (Nov 13, 2022)

One of my brothers served in Nam and it became a family thing not to ever talk about it, because he didn't want to.  I am unapologetically patriotic to this country, and have respect beyond measure for those who have served....yet, I am uncomfortable thanking veterans for their service.  I will shake their hand, I will give their shoulder a squeeze, but I remain silent.


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## ManjaroKDE (Nov 13, 2022)

I remember an analogy that was going around in '67.

'When they came from WWII everyone bought them a beer'
'When they came from Korea, they had to buy their own beer'
'When they came home from Vietnam, they were lucky to get in the bar'


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## Nathan (Nov 13, 2022)

ManjaroKDE said:


> I remember an analogy that was going around in '67.
> 
> 'When they came from WWII everyone bought them a beer'
> 'When they came from Korea, they had to buy their own beer'
> 'When they came home from Vietnam, they were lucky to get in the bar'


At one time the VFW rejected Vietnam vets, that has stuck with me.  A friend from the gym is married to the head of the local VFW, she assures me that no longer the case.  I've visited several times, but probably will not join, I'm not a "joiner" anyway.


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## Alligatorob (Nov 13, 2022)

ManjaroKDE said:


> 'When they came from WWII everyone bought them a beer'
> 'When they came from Korea, they had to buy their own beer'
> 'When they came home from Vietnam, they were lucky to get in the bar'


Sad, but too much truth to it...


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## Old_Dame (Nov 13, 2022)

“How do you feel when you are thanked for your service?”

Knowing this question is posed for Veterans, makes me appreciate the answers given by our veteran-members.

It’s interesting to note their reaction to the question, and listen to what they think, which allows great opportunity to dwell and ponder upon their thoughts.

Often does our society’s-gratitude overshadow the individual voice, and personal sentiment of the man, woman, who’s self-talk been neglected, dimmed, behind the uniform worn in service to our country.

Making these allowances and opportunities to hear what they have to say is important, as their voices lend hint and insight of deep emotion echoed among other vets who’ve served our society, many of which have gone disregarded; or unstated.

As for society’s gratitude, or display of being thankful to our veterans; well, that’s another conversation… as is the subject of, “What it means to be Gracious.”

“We can complain because rose bushes have thorns, or rejoice because thorns have roses.”—A. Karr


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## Been There (Nov 13, 2022)

Nathan said:


> At one time the VFW rejected Vietnam vets, that has stuck with me.  A friend from the gym is married to the head of the local VFW, she assures me that no longer the case.  I've visited several times, but probably will not join, I'm not a "joiner" anyway.


I belong to the American Legion, only because my dad was a member and when he was killed, they kept calling and asking if they could help in anyway.


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## JaniceM (Nov 13, 2022)

Nathan said:


> I feel a bit uncomfortable, after being villainized coming back from Vietnam now being "thanked" for that service just seems hollow.


but maybe people who say it now are actually sincere..


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## oldmontana (Nov 13, 2022)

fuzzybuddy said:


> When someone says, "Thank you for your service", I feel uncomfortable. I spent 4 years as a Corpsman in the US Navy, and I'm proud of what I did. I was a good Corpsman. Yet, when I think of what other guys have done, and gave up............. I was never in danger, never missed a meal, never even slept on dirty sheets. Yeah, I understand we all did our part in a large military scheme, we all gave something. But I think the guys, who gave up their limbs and lives really are the men we owe a huge unrepayable debt. I think the "thanks" should go to those men. How do you feel when you are thanked for your service?


The only time I am thanked for my service is I have my cap on that has this on it.

ARMY SECURITY AGENCY
Europe Veteran  

Sometimes it does lead to an interesting discussion.


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## Knight (Nov 13, 2022)

In the U S Navy for 10 years & do think that what I did had value I've never thought about being thanked for my service until this thread question was asked. I don't wear any clothing or way to show that I served, the only recognition I get is at Lowes where I signed up for the veteran 10% military discount.  The older clerks seem to be genuine in there thanking me. The younger ones seem to be saying it's something they are supposed to say. 

Either way I just smile & thank them for the recognition.


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## David777 (Nov 13, 2022)

Some members of all forums will thank veterans generally online.  Tis simple and easy.  But thanking service members in person is uncommon even if people know you were in the service.  The one genuine thanks I ever got personally was indirect.  After an HD from the USAF during the Viet Nam War in which I didn't ever serve in the immediate combat arena, two appreciative of all those that served, engineers at a Palo Alto start-up when technical jobs were somewhat tight, chose to hire me over others as a junior tech for $2.76 per hour.  All I needed just like many others, was that initial foot in the door to make a career.  A door that often never opens for numbers of young otherwise trained qualified people.  Sad.

Thanks Mel and Ken!


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## Llynn (Nov 13, 2022)

It doesn't make me the slightest bit uncomfortable. However it would have been more meaningful if the thanks were given back in 1970.


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## Alligatorob (Nov 14, 2022)

Knight said:


> In the U S Navy for 10 years & do think that what I did had value


Of course it did, you were one of those folks prepared to face danger on a moments notice, for us.  

That has a lot of value, no matter what your actual duties.


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## fuzzybuddy (Nov 14, 2022)

I do value my service-hell, it was 4 years out of my life. But when I think of what some other guys gave up, they gave up way more than I did. I feel it's those men, who should be thanked.


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## Oldguy (Nov 14, 2022)

My Dad (on left) was part of the Greatest Generation.  Pic from Army Air Corp in San Antonio.  No idea who the other 2 guys are.
There were two stories floating around about his service during WWII.  One, he blew out his knee in training and never got sent overseas, instead put into the office that typed up orders for everyone else to be sent overseas.  The other story was he volunteered for some program that figured out artillery charts to allow troops to hit the correct targets, again, never going overseas.  Not sure which one is true.

He always thanked anyone that he recognized as a Vet.  He felt he didn't deserve the thanks, only those that actually went to war... although he always thanked his 3 children who were in the service each Nov 11th.

I spent 7 years in U.S. Army.  No wars.  I wear a hat that states U.S. Army, but it's my reminder that my Daughter-in-Law is out there serving right now, putting her life on the line.  I send any "thank you for your service" on to her.


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## Geezer Garage (Nov 14, 2022)

I have mixed emotions about it. I thank young service people when the opportunity presents itself, but as others have said, it makes me somewhat uncomortable when it is directed to me. I have to say I ran into very little derision returning from Vietnam. I also felt by the time I was discharged that I had participated in an unjust war, and still feel that way to this day. Who ever said that "war is hell" certainly got it right, and it is my most fervent hope that some day, the ignorance, greed, and arrogance of the men who start them will forever fade from the earth.


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## squatting dog (Nov 14, 2022)

IKE said:


> Not that I don't appreciate the thought but it makes me feel uncomfortable also......don't feel that I need a thank you for doing my job.
> 
> I just nod and say thank you back and go on about my business.


Same here.


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## CallMeKate (Dec 26, 2022)

Nathan said:


> I feel a bit uncomfortable, after being villainized coming back from Vietnam now being "thanked" for that service just seems hollow.


Yes, this.  My husband has always said the same thing... it's just been a relatively short time that people have started saying that to be in vogue (at least it seems that way.)   Anyhow, he's always mentions how ya'll were treated coming back from 'Nam, and a thank you now after being spit on (literally) back then absolutey rings hollow.  @Nathan


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## Disgustedman (Dec 26, 2022)

I'll be honest, I feel it's not "Helpful" to service members being thanked so late. I try to donate to causes (DAV for one) and show my appreciation that way.


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## 1955 (Dec 26, 2022)

Oldguy said:


> View attachment 250062


Great Picture! I have many of granddad's pictures & diaries from WW1 just amazing how tough these people were.


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## Been There (Dec 29, 2022)

I try not to wear any military apparel and I don't have a military (retired) license plate on my vehicles or any decals or stickers on any of my personal property. Even when we go to our HOA's Veterans Day celebration, I never stand when they ask for all Veterans to stand and people applaud them. 

I used to look for guys that were in the Navy and wore a cap from the USS Enterprise, a Forestall, Ford, Nimitz, Vincennes and a few others. Those men had plenty of stories to tell.


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## Chet (Dec 29, 2022)

Since there is no draft anymore, I think a lot of people think serving was a big deal. For many it was, but for me it was a way to get out of Dodge and see the world which was what it was for me.


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## Nathan (Dec 29, 2022)

Been There said:


> I try not to wear any military apparel and I don't have a military (retired) license plate on my vehicles or any decals or stickers on any of my personal property.


All I have is an inconspicuous  window sticker on my truck:


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## Farrah Nuff (Dec 29, 2022)

I feel awkward, to tell the truth.
Grateful yet awkward as well.


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## Verisure (Dec 29, 2022)

fuzzybuddy said:


> How do you feel when you are thanked for your service?​


I feel uncomfortable because I am ashamed of what we did in Vietnam so I only reply, "Thank you" and hope he/she doesn't dwell on the subject because I don't think he/she needs to know what I am feeling.


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## squatting dog (Dec 29, 2022)

Verisure said:


> I feel uncomfortable because I am ashamed of what we did in Vietnam so I only reply, "Thank you" and hope he/she doesn't dwell on the subject because I don't think he/she needs to know what I am feeling.


While I'm not ashamed of what I did in Vietnam, (Well... I am a little concerned how it'll affect me in the afterlife),  I too hope nobody dwells on the subject because I don't think they would believe what a grunt went through and had to endure.


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## Verisure (Dec 29, 2022)

squatting dog said:


> While I'm not ashamed of what I did in Vietnam, (Well... I am a little concerned how it'll affect me in the afterlife),  I too hope nobody dwells on the subject because I don't think they would believe what a grunt went through and had to endure.


I agree with that but for me, it's more that I don't want "to get started". I don't know if I am considered a tolerant person but certain subjects I need to avoid because my emotions are too strong for me to keep silent. I just don't think getting into a(nother) confrontation is such a good idea. Anyway, the person who says, "Thank you for your service" is trying to be nice. What sort of an ass would I be to bully him into a corner?


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## 911 (Dec 30, 2022)

I used to have people thanking me for being a cop. I would tell them, you know I get paid to do my job? The Pennsylvania State Police will change a flat tire on an interstate or turnpike, if help is needed. I have changed oodles of tires. I have also been offered money and tips for doing it. I tell them that I’m not allowed to accept any money or gifts for favors.


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## Murrmurr (Dec 30, 2022)

fuzzybuddy said:


> When someone says, "Thank you for your service", I feel uncomfortable. I spent 4 years as a Corpsman in the US Navy, and I'm proud of what I did. I was a good Corpsman. Yet, when I think of what other guys have done, and gave up............. I was never in danger, never missed a meal, never even slept on dirty sheets. Yeah, I understand we all did our part in a large military scheme, we all gave something. But I think the guys, who gave up their limbs and lives really are the men we owe a huge unrepayable debt. I think the "thanks" should go to those men. How do you feel when you are thanked for your service?


My son Grant feels exactly that way too. He gave the Navy 23 years, but not his life. He was a Seabee metals worker, engineer, and eventually Chief Petty Officer. Sure, he'd come under fire, especially when he had to go out into the desert to repair armored vehicles and such, but he was always under the protection of at least several, sometimes a dozen Marines who'd form an armed circle around him no matter how long the repair took....because those vehicles were extremely valuable.

Grant values his service for what it taught him and what it made him. It taught him to appreciate life and to be himself 100% even if it makes others a bit uncomfortable. It made him a person who sets goals for the sake of his own personal happiness, and who knows how to achieve them. Sounds selfish, but his friends, *customers, and fellow bike-club members admire him, his wife adores him, and I'm very proud of him. 

*his fairly profitable hobby is designing & building custom bicycles and bicycle parts.


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