# AARP Updates 55 ALIVE Program



## SifuPhil (Mar 12, 2013)

The art and science of guiding a large, heavy piece of metal around OTHER large, heavy pieces of metal - otherwise known as driving - can become more difficult as we age due to the loss of reflexes and the dulling of senses. AARP, the American Association of Retired Persons, offers a wonderful refresher course known as 55 Alive which has recently been updated to address the current state of American roadways and the drivers found on them.

Here's a quick overview of some of the changes AARP has instituted ...



Make sure your vehicle "fits" you. Driving around town in a low-slung Corvette can impair your visibility to others as well as your own lines of sight, even while it simultaneously improves the odds of picking up a college girl. You'll have to decide which is more important: vision or passion. 
When another driver is tailgating you at 55MPH, you should: 


Slowly reduce speed and signal the driver that it is safe to pass 
Speed up in the hopes that you'll lose the tailgater 
Slam on the brakes, get out and beat him senseless with your titanium cane 



Night driving becomes a challenge for many adults as they age. Rather than stay home and miss out on all the fun, you can install Hella driving lights on the front grill and/or roof of your vehicle to help light the way. 






Try to eliminate distractions while you're driving. Turn off the radio, put down the cell phone and extinguish that joint. 
It is NOT a good idea to use your oxygen bottle as a substitute for the vehicle's nitrous oxide boost system.


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## pchinvegas (Mar 13, 2013)

Try to eliminate distractions while you're driving. Turn off the radio, put down the cell phone and extinguish that joint.

Oh now your pushin it  ! TURN OFF the radio, No Cell, wait and No JOINT ? Shit I'm staying home !


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## SifuPhil (Mar 13, 2013)

pchinvegas said:


> Oh now your pushin it  ! TURN OFF the radio, No Cell, wait and No JOINT ? Shit I'm staying home !



Hey, I didn't mention the _cookies_ ... 

I'm just looking at it from a _legal_, not a practical, point of view. Besides, the thought of me biking along on my little red Schwinn, sharing the road with Granny GoodHemp in her 2-ton Megamobile, is just a little TOO scary!  

"I'm sorry, dear ... I didn't see you ... I was too busy looking at the lines in my palm."


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