# Ladies Do you Consider men wolf whistling at you ****** Harassment?



## hollydolly (Apr 29, 2015)

There's a big heated debate  going on here in the media, after a young lady reported some builders who wolf whistled at her as she passed their building site. The 23 year old said she's received 'sexist comments ' on her way to work every day and so reported the workmen to the Police for ****** harassment.

Have a read here...

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...wolf-whistled-builders-Cut-heated-debate.html


...what's your opinion... ( ladies, ..and men too)... do you consider it offensive enough to report it to the police? Are you or were you flattered or offended  if you receive/d a wolf whistle?


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## Warrigal (Apr 29, 2015)

I have to agree with this comment



> Sarah, 25, from London, who is married with no children, says: 'I always used to think wolf whistling was a bit of harmless fun – a compliment even. As a shy teenager, getting a bit of attention from a passing guy was a real confidence boost; a friendly acknowledgement that the time I'd spent getting ready to leave the house wasn't going unappreciated and total strangers thought I looked good.
> 
> But the more it happened, and the more intimidating the situations became, the more uncomfortable these 'harmless compliments' made me feel. I can remember it happening once when I was on my own, taking my usual shortcut home, and suddenly feeling vulnerable in a way that I never had before, when men had whistled at me in more public spaces. Rather than a cheeky signal of appreciation, it actually felt quite sinister and frightening, and made me acutely aware that I was alone with a man much bigger and stronger than me.
> Since then the tone of wolf whistling seems to have changed for me. I feel self-conscious and anxious around strange men, worried that they're silently judging me even when they don't whistle or leer at me. When I lived in Paris, being harassed by strange men on the street became part of my weekly routine, and what I'd once thought of as just a flirty bit of whistling became associated with much nastier, scarier things.
> ...


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## Ralphy1 (Apr 29, 2015)

Hmm, but could this lead to complaining about obvious ogling?


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## Warrigal (Apr 29, 2015)

*Obvious* ogling ? Definitely.


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## Glinda (Apr 29, 2015)

If a gentleman wants to compliment a lady, he should do just that, in a sincere, civilized manner.  I've never been flattered by crude behavior.


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## Cookie (Apr 29, 2015)

Most construction sites nowadays have big walls around them and workers can't see pedestrians going by. But it used to happen to me when I was young and it made me feel very uncomfortable and apprehensive going near a work site. When I worked in one human resource office years ago, a guy came in to hand in his resume.  While he was at it he leered at me and gave me the tongue waggle. I don't know what else to call it.  I felt insulted and degraded and couldn't believe he was so stupid to do that when he wanted a job.  I immediately threw the resume into the trash.


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## Shalimar (Apr 29, 2015)

I don't like crude behaviour either. It is about power not compliments. It degrades both parties involved.


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## Ralphy1 (Apr 29, 2015)

I try keep my ogling of a complimentary nature...


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## Ralphy1 (Apr 29, 2015)

OK, I'm climbing back up, but gracefully this time...


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## QuickSilver (Apr 29, 2015)

Having been removed from the obvious ogling and crude comments or gestures or noises  for a while now.......It might be nice to experience every so often..


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## Shalimar (Apr 29, 2015)

Have a banana Ralphy!


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## Falcon (Apr 29, 2015)

Being a man, I hate to admit it, but many of my brethren are of the knuckle-dragging mouth breathing types
that they don't know when to stop. Wolf whistling is innocent up to a point; after that it can lead to trouble.


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## AZ Jim (Apr 29, 2015)

Why is "Wolf whistling" ever OK?  Does it somehow make anyone more manly?  It's insulting to the woman and it serves no goof purpose.


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## Josiah (Apr 29, 2015)

Shalimar said:


> I don't like crude behaviour either. It is about power not compliments. It degrades both parties involved.



I agree with Shalimar that it's more about power and not compliments.


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## QuickSilver (Apr 29, 2015)

Wait...   I always thought a low wolf whistle to be a compliment..  Never bothered me and I was never offended.    Yelling, crude comments  and swinging from a tree are a different story.


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## Cookie (Apr 29, 2015)

Maybe it depends on what country your in. I just don't see it happening  around here any more, whistling or ogling (at even young pretty  babes). Men around here seem to be very well behaved, or maybe just  tired from a long haul in the office. But it used to be said that in one  European country, way back when, men would not only whistle, but  actually grab and pinch.

We've all probably seen Ruth Orkin's photograph from the 50s.


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## Shalimar (Apr 29, 2015)

Where I live the ogling still exists according to my young friends, but the whistling and comments apparently have diminished since I encountered them in my youth. I was feisty, and poured a whole bottle of coke over one redneck ****** who made the mistake of using the c word. Another time I kneed an individual who pinched me. Small does not necessarily mean helpless. After that they ignored me.


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## SeaBreeze (Apr 29, 2015)

Wolfwhistles have been going on since I was a child, I remember walking with my oldest sister while shopping, and she was getting them and ignoring them.  My husband's not the type to whistle or make remarks to women, but it's a fact that many men are.  It really doesn't bother me, like my sister, I ignore them.  If a complimentary comment is made, I also pay no attention to that, even if I was single, I wouldn't want to necessarily hook up with that type of man.  If the man was close and made a really crude vulgar comment, I might say something back to put him in his place.  Would I ever call the police for a man whistling at me or making a flirtatious comment....no way.


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## GeorgiaXplant (Apr 29, 2015)

That was so long ago that I don't remember...


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## Bee (Apr 29, 2015)

I was out with my grandaughter who at the time was in her late teens and we heard some wolf whistles and I turned to her and asked if they were for her or me.:bigwink:

I was never offended by wolf whistles and took them as a compliment.................and I still would, if only.:lol1:


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## QuickSilver (Apr 29, 2015)

That's for sure....  It's been a long time...  lol!!


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## Cookie (Apr 29, 2015)

Take another look at this picture;  Does this girl look happy about what is happening?  Does she look intimidated and scared?  I would say yes, she seems like she'd like to get away from these guys.


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## Josiah (Apr 29, 2015)

You've all seen this video haven't you it was talked about endlessly a couple of months ago.


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## Shalimar (Apr 29, 2015)

Yes I have seen it Josiah, it made me burn.


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## AZ Jim (Apr 29, 2015)

When I get whistled at, I take it in stride.  After all it is hard to contain oneself when overwhelming handsomeness is at hand.


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## Glinda (Apr 29, 2015)

AZ Jim said:


> When I get whistled at, I take it in stride.  After all it is hard to contain oneself when overwhelming handsomeness is at hand.



:lofl:


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## Jackie22 (Apr 29, 2015)

....at my age, I think I'd welcome a wolf whistle.


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## AZ Jim (Apr 29, 2015)

Ooops


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## AZ Jim (Apr 29, 2015)

Jackie22 said:


> ....at my age, I think I'd welcome a wolf whistle.


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## Shalimar (Apr 29, 2015)

Sorry guys, I just don't see the humour in  treating women poorly.


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## AZ Jim (Apr 29, 2015)

Lighten up, I agree.


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## Cookie (Apr 29, 2015)

Here ya go, hope this is enlightening!  layful:


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## Mrs. Robinson (Apr 29, 2015)

It always embarrassed me. I never got mad but I would really rather not be the center of attention-EVER.


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## Warrigal (Apr 29, 2015)

I can tell you it doesn't help when you are escorting a whole class of twelve year old schoolgirls to the swimming pool for a lesson.
And no, I was not delusional. It was for me and not the girls in their school uniforms because of the comments that went with the whistle.
They meant it as light banter but totally inappropriate.

A man who wanted to show his appreciation of a woman did a lot better by tipping his hat as he smiled and said "G'day". Do that three days in a row and the ice is broken for a gentle advance towards a conversation. If courtship is not on his mind, he would do better to say and do nothing. Young women do not need to be validated by men passing comment on their appearance. If men feel entitled to show approval, what's to stop them from expressing their negative evaluations? Who needs that every time you leave the house?


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## Davey Jones (Apr 29, 2015)

What does wholf whistling sound like????


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## Warrigal (Apr 29, 2015)

A shrill two note whistle - the first note higher than the second. It is designed to capture attention to the whistler and to the object of the whistle.
I chose the last verb carefully because the effect of it is to objectify a woman. It also used to be a way to determine whether or not a woman was "easy", depending on her response.


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## Shalimar (Apr 29, 2015)

Thank you Cookie! I am much lighter now!layful:


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## Cookie (Apr 29, 2015)

Glad to hear it, so am I.  We ain't heavy.., he's our brother.... la la la la la la ....Let's just try to stay on the ground and not float away.


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## Shalimar (Apr 29, 2015)

Sounds like you are already up there Cookie??? What kind of glue do you put in your glue gun anyway? Just sayinnn...layful:


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## Cookie (Apr 29, 2015)

What?..... Can't hear you. Blue bum did you say?  ....layful:


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## Shalimar (Apr 29, 2015)

Cookie, are you teasing me about my bruised butt? Wicked woman!nthego:


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## Cookie (Apr 29, 2015)

Nooooooo, I would never do that..... not me......  I didn't even know......you poor widdal munchkin, ..... have you got Arnica gel? Works good..... also hot bath with epsum salts? Feel better soon.


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## Shalimar (Apr 29, 2015)

Thanks, I think, Cookie. munchkin???


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## Cookie (Apr 29, 2015)

Your very welcome. Bad joke?


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## Shalimar (Apr 29, 2015)

Cookie, no bad joke, just funnin...:love_heart:


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## Cookie (Apr 29, 2015)

kay:


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## AZ Jim (Apr 29, 2015)

Davey Jones said:


> What does wholf whistling sound like????


I suspect you know Holly means wolf whistle.  It's a simple typo.


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## Debby (Apr 30, 2015)

When I was younger and occasionally got that treatment, I always felt uncomfortable and actually kind of nervous.  Didn't happen often because I always made a point of avoiding streets where that was a possibility although once when I was waiting for a bus out in front of a pet shop where I'd gone to daydream over the puppies (I didn't know better when I was a teenager folks), I did have some guy ask me if I was 'working'.  That was really unnerving.


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## AZ Jim (Apr 30, 2015)

Debby said:


> When I was younger and occasionally got that treatment, I always felt uncomfortable and actually kind of nervous.  Didn't happen often because I always made a point of avoiding streets where that was a possibility although once when I was waiting for a bus out in front of a pet shop where I'd gone to daydream over the puppies (I didn't know better when I was a teenager folks), I did have some guy ask me if I was 'working'.  That was really unnerving.



I guess you were not wearing your False nose then, eh?


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## Shalimar (Apr 30, 2015)

That must have been an uncomfortable experience for you, Debby. Certainly not something to joke about.


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## AZ Jim (Apr 30, 2015)

"Certainly not something to joke about."  I may be wrong Shalimar, but I think Debby knows I wasn't meaning anything but a teasing remark about her disguise.


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## hollydolly (Apr 30, 2015)

AZ Jim said:


> I suspect you know Holly means wolf whistle.  It's a simple typo.



errrm where did I spell it wholf ?


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## AZ Jim (Apr 30, 2015)

Title...No biggie everyone knew what you meant.


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## AZ Jim (Apr 30, 2015)

Ahhhhh you fixed it....hahahaha :tonguer maybe seabreeze  did...


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## Debby (Apr 30, 2015)

AZ Jim said:


> I guess you were not wearing your False nose then, eh?




It's taken me 60 years to 'get over my nose' Jim (no cracks about the size eh!) and you are determined to focus on it....tsk, tsk, tsk.  Good thing I don't have a beard to match my mustache eh?


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## AZ Jim (Apr 30, 2015)

You are cute even with your Graucho Marx disguise....BTW Graucho and I both share Oct 2 as birthdays.


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## Debby (Apr 30, 2015)

Shalimar said:


> That must have been an uncomfortable experience for you, Debby. Certainly not something to joke about.




At the time I was probably shocked, horrified, embarrassed, whatever.   But in looking back, I don't think I was actually too surprised because the pet shop was located in an area of the city that had a number of scuzzy bars.  My first job at a tiny little ''hole in the wall precious gems wholesaler was a couple blocks away which is why I was there at all.  So maybe I mumbled something about 'being off shift' and then walked/ran back to the little hole in the wall and felt safe again with little Mrs. Hess alongside as we counted the jewels.  

I guess at one time it was a better end of downtown because it did have a beautiful old theatre there where the gentry probably went for an evenings entertainment, but by that time it had gone down hill a lot.  


I can remember getting flashed a couple times and groped in the stairwell at the office I worked in as well .  But you know, when you're in your teens back in that time, most girls didn't say much about incidents like that.  You kept your mouth shut and just tried to avoid nasty places or people.


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## Shalimar (Apr 30, 2015)

I hear you, Debby. Those were the days when bad things did not happen to good girls.  Yeah right! Not certain that much has changed. In Canuckistan, aka Harperville, the stats for rape conviction are appalling.


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## AprilT (Apr 30, 2015)

Debby said:


> At the time I was probably shocked, horrified, embarrassed, whatever.   But in looking back, I don't think I was actually too surprised because the pet shop was located in an area of the city that had a number of scuzzy bars.  My first job at a tiny little ''hole in the wall precious gems wholesaler was a couple blocks away which is why I was there at all.  So maybe I mumbled something about 'being off shift' and then walked/ran back to the little hole in the wall and felt safe again with little Mrs. Hess alongside as we counted the jewels.
> 
> I guess at one time it was a better end of downtown because it did have a beautiful old theatre there where the gentry probably went for an evenings entertainment, but by that time it had gone down hill a lot.
> 
> ...



Sad but so true, events such as that were quite frequent back in the day for me as a kid and in my teens, I remember some of those incidents very vividly.  One of the homes I lived in the police had to be called on a few occasions as there would be several men performing in sync at separate ends of the roof across the way from our residence facing our windows.  This roof thing happened during my youth when I was between ages 8-10.  I've been groped many times including in my teens and later adult years including being followed harassed beyond belief and still do get harassed once and a while now while in my 50's. Some might think it's cute, it's not.


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## hollydolly (Apr 30, 2015)

AZ Jim said:


> Ahhhhh you fixed it....hahahaha :tonguer maybe seabreeze  did...



I didn't edit anything!!


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## AZ Jim (Apr 30, 2015)

Seabreeze or Matrix.


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## Shalimar (Apr 30, 2015)

April, I am so sorry you had the experiences you did. My own non existent childhood was riddled with abuse. This stuff is traumatic, and follows you throughout your life. No wonder so many women have trust issues. When will we be taken seriously?


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## Debby (Apr 30, 2015)

AprilT said:


> Sad but so true, events such as that were quite frequent back in the day for me as a kid and in my teens, I remember some of those incidents very vividly.  One of the homes I lived in the police had to be called on a few occasions as would be several men performing in sync at separate ends of the roof across the way from our residence facing our windows.  I was this roof thing happened in my youth when I was between ages 8-10.  I've been grouped many times including in my teens and later adult years including being followed harassed beyond belief and still do get harassed once and a while now while in my 50's. Some might think it's cute, it's not.




Hey April, as you mention being harassed even when you were/are in your fifties,  I was reminded of when I had to walk past a group of road repair guys who were having a smoke break on the Walmart sidewalk just last year.  Gosh I'm 60, haven't had any notice that way in years (I live in a very rural area and don't get out much except for weekly grocery shopping) and yet, walking past that group, I still felt uncomfortable.  It stays with you doesn't it?


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## Shalimar (Apr 30, 2015)

Hey, Debby, I ain't no spring chicken either. When I first moved into the Tombs five years ago, I was accosted in the elevator by some old man who was shopping for a new sex buddy, since it appeared his girlfriend was tired of him. He groped my butt as I left the elevator. I slapped him, and threatened to rreport him to the condo board. Ewww. Not a nice welcome to a senior's building! His excuse was, I should not 'advertise' by wearing tight jeans. Really??? I tore him  a new one, as my son would say.


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## AprilT (Apr 30, 2015)

Debbie, yes, it truly does follow you, to this day, I'm not fond of passing work sites or groups of men in general.  I don't harbor bad feelings toward men as a group, I just don't like that feeling I get when I am about to pass a gathered group and it reflects to back to those experiences, for me, no where near the same today, but still happens once and a while.  

Take a look, happens all over






very disturbing this man is touching and rubbing himself against women in a store, stuttle, but you can see it some of the women feel somethings not quite right, but, aren't sure they just move.


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## Debby (Apr 30, 2015)

How gross and tacky Shalimar! and good for you standing up to Mr. McCreepy!  Good thing there are good guys out there for us to marry otherwise two options:  The human 'family unit' would have disappeared as women decided they didn't want to bother or the world would be populated by super-nasties .  But thank goodness there are enough nice guys to outweigh the others!  We love you nice guys!

As to your videos April, also gross and tacky!  Dreadful behaviour from men who have no respect or self control!  Yech.


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## Shalimar (Apr 30, 2015)

April, Debby, I still experience discomfort around men I don't know. It is not logical, but these types of learned responses are almost impossible to completely overcome, even after my exposure to many kind and trusting men.


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## Shalimar (Apr 30, 2015)

Thanks for your support, Debby. At the time I was shocked, I thought I was too old for that stuff. Apparently perversion knows no age limit, who knew. He avoids me now, which is awesome. Fortunately, men such as he are in the minority, I am blessed with colleagues and friends of the male gender who  truly light up my life. Big mushy teddy bears, each and everyone! Thanks, guys, for the joy you bring to this woman's life!


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## Bee (Apr 30, 2015)

This 20 year old student has got the right attitude in my opinion.

*An Oxford University student has written a heartfelt letter to a man who sexually assaulted her.*
_*Ione Wells has spoken out about the attack in April in an open letter, published in the university's newspaper, the Cherwell.*_
_*She wrote that she would not let the attack change her and would come out of it stronger.*_
_*Ione also used the letter to argue that attacks are never the victim's fault, with the hashtag #NotGuilty.*_
_*The 20-year-old was attacked as she walked home from Chalk Farm London Underground station early on Saturday 11 April.*_

More here.....

http://www.bbc.co.uk/newsbeat/artic...---oxford-university-student-published-letter


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## Shalimar (Apr 30, 2015)

Bee, that is the most powerful statement I have ever heard. It brought me to tears. I am going to take a copy of it to my local women's ****** assault counseling office, as well as to where my colleagues work. Bless you for sharing this with us. I am overwhelmed. Blessed be the strength of women, blessed be our humanity in spite of everything. :love_heart:


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## AZ Jim (Apr 30, 2015)

Good for her Bee, very brave and very right.


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## Bee (Apr 30, 2015)

Shalimar said:


> Bee, that is the most powerful statement I have ever heard. It brought me to tears. I am going to take a copy of it to my local women's ****** assault counseling office, as well as to where my colleagues work. Bless you for sharing this with us. I am overwhelmed. Blessed be the strength of women, blessed be our humanity in spite of everything. :love_heart:




Shalimar, if it helps then I am pleased for you.


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## Bee (Apr 30, 2015)

AZ Jim said:


> Good for her Bee, very brave and very right.




Yes Jim she is a very brave girl and with the right attitude.


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## QuickSilver (Apr 30, 2015)

How did we get from "Wolf Whistles"  to rape???     IMO.... a wolf whistle... is not harrassment... it's a compliment..   Dirty words... filthy inuendos... touching... pawing.. groping... and at the end of the spectum rape...  NOT a compliment.


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## Bee (Apr 30, 2015)

:dunno:


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## AprilT (Apr 30, 2015)

QuickSilver said:


> How did we get from "Wolf Whistles"  to rape???     IMO.... a wolf whistle... is not harrassment... it's a compliment..   Dirty words... filthy inuendos... touching... pawing.. groping... and at the end of the spectum rape...  NOT a compliment.



True, but, then, I'm not even familiar with the term wolf whistle, so, I plead the 5th for including the ****** harassment and pawing.  But there was what I guess the mistaken implied question of harassment, not rape, but ****** harassment and making the comparison, no?


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## Shalimar (Apr 30, 2015)

Just as humour is often the first step in racism, so is a wolf whistle sometimes the beginning of something much more sinister. To those individuals whose lives have not been impacted in that manner, I salute you. Some women have not been so fortunate, but may choose not to air their stories on an open forum. In my career, I have met too many.


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## QuickSilver (Apr 30, 2015)

_Oh puleeeze..    I would REALLY love to hear a wolf whistle now... or even a Semi truck honking at me..   AND YES... Speaking from experience.. I KNOW what rape is...  OK??   Nuff said. _


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## AZ Jim (May 1, 2015)

Someone doing something about street harassment.

[h=1]Street Artist Wants the World to Fight Catcalls, One Poster at a Time[/h]

*takepart.com*/article/2015/04/14/stop-telling-women-smile-goes-global-through-street-art-campaign
By Liz Dwyer  
	

	
	
		
		

		
			




      April 14, 2015    By Liz Dwyer




    Staff Writer Liz Dwyer has written about race, parenting, and social  justice for several national publications. She was previously education  editor at _Good_.   full bio follow me     



   It’s been two years since Brooklyn-based illustrator and painter Tatyana Fazlalizadeh  launched “Stop Telling Women to Smile,” a series of sketches that turns  the spotlight on the problem of gender-based street harassment.  Fazlalizadeh put her eye-catching pictures up around New York City, and  the images, with captions that address the catcalling women commonly experience when they’re walking down the street, went viral across the Web. Now, as part of International Anti*–*Street  Harassment Week, Fazlalizadeh is spearheading an international night of  wheat-pasting her images in public, an art-based effort for people who  want to end street harassment.





   (Photo: 'The Librarian Loves'/'Stop Telling Women to Smile'/Tumblr)

     “On April 18, walls across the world will bear the faces and words from women protesting street harassment,” said 
Fazlalizadeh  in a statement. That means come Saturday night, women and supporters  everywhere are invited to engage in a little local civil disobedience to  disrupt an alarming norm of women's objectification. The artist’s campaign is the latest in women’s attempts to address the problem of not feeling comfortable in their own neighborhoods. Last fall _The Daily Show_ correspondent  Jessica Williams made a video that showed her being catcalled by guys  in Manhattan. Williams offered women satirical tips on how to avoid  verbal abuse, such as running down the street singing “The Star Spangled Banner.” In October, a video from anti–street harassment organization Hollaback!, which filmed a woman walking through New York City and being catcalled by men 108 times over 10 hours, went viral on the Web.





   (Photo: 'Stop Telling Women to Smile'/Tumblr)
    As for “Stop Telling Women to Smile,” the campaign will provide free copies of Fazlalizadeh’s pictures to people who request them through its website.  The posters are currently available in English and Spanish, but if a  participant wants a different language and can provide an accurate  translation, Fazlalizadeh will attempt to accommodate that. Participants  get an email of a downloadable PDF of one of the posters that can be  put up in the community, street art–style.
 Indeed, the  campaign is rooted in the vibrant culture that sees artists putting  images that tend to address social issues up on walls, fences, and other  public places. Street artists usually use wheat paste, an adhesive  that’s made from combining wheat flour or starch with water.
 “The idea  behind the wheat-pasting night is to create a night of solidarity.  People from all over can participate in a night of action, knowing that  hundreds of people in different parts of the world are doing the same  thing,” said Fazlalizadeh.





   (Photo: 'Stop Telling Women to Smile'/Tumblr)


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## Shalimar (May 1, 2015)

Awesome!


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## Cookie (May 12, 2015)

*Hydro One Employee to be Fired for Hurling Vulgarities at City News Reporter
*
[video]http://www.citynews.ca/2015/05/12/hydro-one-to-fire-employee-for-hurling-vulgarities-at-citynews-reporter/[/video]

http://www.citynews.ca/2015/05/12/combatting-******-harassment-in-the-streets/


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## ndynt (May 12, 2015)

Cookie, that is amazing.  They are adult men.  Cannot understand their mentality.  Have they no sense of decency or self respect?  Mind boggling ! ! !


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## Cookie (May 12, 2015)

Really, it's a vile trend of some sort.  Hope that's the last we hear of it.


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## Glinda (May 12, 2015)

These a******* need to do time.


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## ndynt (May 12, 2015)

If they are not punished I envision international copy cat episodes.


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