# Emotional support for future retirees



## Ariela (Jul 21, 2022)

Just wondering if anyone have some experience or thoughts. 
I tried to talk online with therapists who dropped me like a hot potato when I brought up the subject.


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## Pepper (Jul 21, 2022)

A friend of mine needed emotional support after retirement.  She saw a psychiatrist, went on meds, but got the most support after joining a senior center & meeting up with the yoga and meditation teachers whom she confided in.  These teachers are very special people who took an interest to see her made whole.

I don't understand your therapists dropping you.  Perhaps face to face is better than online.  In fact, it is.


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## officerripley (Jul 21, 2022)

Pepper said:


> A friend of mine needed emotional support after retirement.  She saw a psychiatrist, went on meds, but got the most support after joining a senior center & meeting up with the yoga and meditation teachers whom she confided in.  These teachers are very special people who took an interest to see her made whole.
> 
> I don't understand your therapists dropping you.  Perhaps face to face is better than online.  In fact, it is.


I agree with this, and can really relate to Ariela's experience of being dropped like a hot potato due to an experience I had. I hadn't retired yet--so hadn't yet realized how there's so little for seniors around here (not really even a seniors center!)--but was hoping for support with a family issue and the therapist told me to try joining a church. When I told her I had tried that before more than once but wasn't interested in trying it yet again because I'm an atheist, she frowned and took a step back from me and was cold and unhelpful the rest of the session. 

I think the emotional support from seniors would be of the most help but I feel so different all the time from the seniors I do get a chance to be around; around here, all of the gals from my age group that I've ever met are religious grandmothers. I've met a few who aren't but they've all been educated, retired professional women who, in spite of my best efforts, barely seem to notice I'm alive. I've had some good interactions with young women--we seem to be more interested in the same kind of things--but (even though I try to keep it to a minimum) when I mention age-related stuff, they act either horrified or just don't understand. 

So thank goodness for this site and a few others I'm on.


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## Ariela (Jul 21, 2022)

Pepper said:


> A friend of mine needed emotional support after retirement.  She saw a psychiatrist, went on meds, but got the most support after joining a senior center & meeting up with the yoga and meditation teachers whom she confided in.  These teachers are very special people who took an interest to see her made whole.
> 
> I don't understand your therapists dropping you.  Perhaps face to face is better than online.  In fact, it is.


Perhaps


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## Ariela (Jul 21, 2022)

officerripley said:


> I agree with this, and can really relate to Ariela's experience of being dropped like a hot potato due to an experience I had. I hadn't retired yet--so hadn't yet realized how there's so little for seniors around here (not really even a seniors center!)--but was hoping for support with a family issue and the therapist told me to try joining a church. When I told her I had tried that before more than once but wasn't interested in trying it yet again because I'm an atheist, she frowned and took a step back from me and was cold and unhelpful the rest of the session.
> 
> I think the emotional support from seniors would be of the most help but I feel so different all the time from the seniors I do get a chance to be around; around here, all of the gals from my age group that I've ever met are religious grandmothers. I've met a few who aren't but they've all been educated, retired professional women who, in spite of my best efforts, barely seem to notice I'm alive. I've had some good interactions with young women--we seem to be more interested in the same kind of things--but (even though I try to keep it to a minimum) when I mention age-related stuff, they act either horrified or just don't understand.
> 
> So thank goodness for this site and a few others I'm on.


So glad to hear what you say


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## officerripley (Jul 21, 2022)

Ariela said:


> So glad to hear what you say


And I'm glad you're glad.  I've had people tell me, "Oh, no no no; that can't be true. I'm sure you misinterpreted things, etc." And I know I have misinterpreted things at time in my life, for sure. But the stuff I mentioned above has happened to me enough times that I know what's going on and have given up on it. In the case of the much-more-educated-than-me women not seeming to know I exist, I think that at least some of the time, they don't realize they're doing it (being prejudiced against the "non-educated"). Because the few times I asked if I could join their groups, there was a moment of shocked silence and then an awkward fumbling around, "Gee, we've never even had someone without a degree even ask to join before so I don't know, uh uh, I'll have to check, um, I'll let you know." And then of course you never hear back.


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## Ariela (Jul 21, 2022)

officerripley said:


> And I'm glad you're glad.  I've had people tell me, "Oh, no no no; that can't be true. I'm sure you misinterpreted things, etc." And I know I have misinterpreted things at time in my life, for sure. But the stuff I mentioned above has happened to me enough times that I know what's going on and have given up on it. In the case of the much-more-educated-than-me women not seeming to know I exist, I think that at least some of the time, they don't realize they're doing it (being prejudiced against the "non-educated"). Because the few times I asked if I could join their groups, there was a moment of shocked silence and then an awkward fumbling around, "Gee, we've never even had someone without a degree even ask to join before so I don't know, uh uh, I'll have to check, um, I'll let you know." And then of course you never hear back.


I like the age related stuff - sound kind of funny, though I often feel as if mentioning my age does not work in my favor.


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## officerripley (Jul 21, 2022)

Ariela said:


> I like the age related stuff - sound kind of funny, though I often feel as if mentioning my age does not work in my favor.


Yeah, same here.


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## bowmore (Jul 21, 2022)

The place for support would be the site early-retirements.org. I am a member and the people there are very helpful.


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## Ariela (Jul 21, 2022)

bowmore said:


> The place for support would be the site early-retirements.org. I am a member and the people there are very helpful.


Thanks


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