# 'Twas the Night Before Christmas....



## jujube (Dec 7, 2022)

I have no idea who originated this, but I think it's hilarious.  Prepare to be offended. 

'Twas the night before Christmas:

8:00 p.m. - I made a snowman

8:10 p.m. - A feminist passed by and asked me why I didn't make a snowwoman.

8:15 p.m. - So I made a snow woman.

8:17 p.m. - My feminist neighbor complained about the snowwoman's voluptuous chest saying it objectified snowwomen everywhere.

8:20 pm - The gay couple living nearby objected that it could have been two snow men instead.

8:22 p.m. - The transgender man/woman/person asked why I didn't just make one snow person with detachable parts.

8:25 p.m. - The Vegans at the end of the lane complained about the carrot nose, as veggies are food and not to be used to decorate snow figures.

8:28 p.m. -  I was called a racist because the snow couple is white.

8:31 p.m. -  The Middle Eastern gent across the road demanded the snowwoman be covered up.

8:40 p.m. - The police arrived saying someone had been offended.

8:42 p.m. - The feminist neighbor complained again that the snowwoman's broomstick needed to be removed because it depicted women in a domestic role.

8:43 p.m. - The town's equality officer responded and threatened me with a ticket.

8:45 p.m. - A mainstream media news crew showed up. I was asked if I knew the difference between snowmen and snowwomen?  I replied "Snowballs" and now I'm called a sexist.

9:00 p.m. - I was portrayed by the media as a suspected terrorist, racist, homophobe, sensibility offender, bent on stirring up trouble during periods of "frightful outdoor weather".

9:10 p.m. - I was asked if I have any accomplices.  My children were then taken by social services.

9:29 p.m. - Far left protestors offended by everything, marched down the street demanding that I be arrested.

Moral of the story:

There is no moral to this story.  This is what we have become, all because of snowflakes.


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## Gaer (Dec 7, 2022)

jujube said:


> I have no idea who originated this, but I think it's hilarious.  Prepare to be offended.
> 
> 'Twas the night before Christmas:
> 
> ...


Love it!


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## CarolfromTX (Dec 7, 2022)

Yep.  Now I’m waiting for the blowback.


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## Old_Dame (Dec 7, 2022)




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