# Last of My Family Leaving the State



## Ruthanne (Apr 24, 2018)

My brother and his wife are moving out of state this Summer.  After their son leaves soon, too, I will be the only one left of my family here.  The past few years we haven't seen each other that often at all so why do I feel sad?  With my income I won't be able to travel and see them but my brother said he will visit every once in awhile.  

I really used to enjoy the times at their home with cookouts, birthdays, weddings, parties.  That was quite awhile ago, though.  

I am hoping I can meet some people here in my state and start some new relationships.


----------



## Mizzkitt (Apr 24, 2018)

Ruthanne, I hope you can meet some nice people too. But while it sounds as if you are not all that tight knit, family is family. Would you consider moving yourself to be closer to them?


----------



## moviequeen1 (Apr 24, 2018)

Ruthanne,I know what you are going thru.My brother and sister left Buffalo years ago when they went off to college,decided not to come back.
I'm the only member of my family who chose to stay here because of my job.
After our parents died,I seriously thought about moving closer to where my brother lives{Rye,NY} but decided against it since I have made a life for myself here.I go to JOhn&his family for Thanksgiving every year,talk with him every Sun
I have a group of friends  I've made over the years,some are from church who I consider my 'extended family',would be lost without them in my life. We always help each other whatever the situation. One of them,Marcia is my emergency contact.
I hope you have some friends who will become your extended family like I have. Sue


----------



## Ruthanne (Apr 25, 2018)

Mizzkitt said:


> Ruthanne, I hope you can meet some nice people too. But while it sounds as if you are not all that tight knit, family is family. Would you consider moving yourself to be closer to them?


Thanks you for your response.  There are several reasons why I can't move closer to them and one is financial.


----------



## Ruthanne (Apr 25, 2018)

moviequeen1 said:


> Ruthanne,I know what you are going thru.My brother and sister left Buffalo years ago when they went off to college,decided not to come back.
> I'm the only member of my family who chose to stay here because of my job.
> After our parents died,I seriously thought about moving closer to where my brother lives{Rye,NY} but decided against it since I have made a life for myself here.I go to JOhn&his family for Thanksgiving every year,talk with him every Sun
> I have a group of friends  I've made over the years,some are from church who I consider my 'extended family',would be lost without them in my life. We always help each other whatever the situation. One of them,Marcia is my emergency contact.
> I hope you have some friends who will become your extended family like I have. Sue


Thank you for your reply.  I have to start being more active and go places to meet people.  There are some people here who have cookouts and I go some times but haven't made any close friendships so far.  Hopefully that will change.


----------



## WhatInThe (Apr 25, 2018)

Just as the family is moving on so should you. It might be tough at first but just keep yourself busy. It might open up more time and create other opportunities. Try taking some classes or join some groups/clubs. The older you get the people in your life just won't be leaving the state as time goes on.

 They say never say never which you could wind up traveling or family could return. Don't wait for fate or good luck though. Make your own life now.

Stay Busy!


----------



## SeaBreeze (Apr 25, 2018)

Hope you can get out more and meet some nice people Ruthanne, being a loner isn't always a good thing, just one good friend you can do things with is priceless.  Good luck, summertime's here, make it work in your favor. :sunshine:


----------



## Ruthanne (Apr 25, 2018)

WhatInThe said:


> Just as the family is moving on so should you. It might be tough at first but just keep yourself busy. It might open up more time and create other opportunities. Try taking some classes or join some groups/clubs. The older you get the people in your life just won't be leaving the state as time goes on.
> 
> They say never say never which you could wind up traveling or family could return. Don't wait for fate or good luck though. Make your own life now.
> 
> Stay Busy!


Thank you, very helpful suggestions!



SeaBreeze said:


> Hope you can get out more and meet some nice people Ruthanne, being a loner isn't always a good thing, just one good friend you can do things with is priceless.  Good luck, summertime's here, make it work in your favor. :sunshine:


No, being a loner is not a good thing for a lot of reasons.  I am thinking of going to the Senior Center in town, I've not been there before. It may be fruitful!:love_heart:


----------



## Warrigal (Apr 25, 2018)

My sister is in rather the opposite situation.

She has recently moved from a beach town on the Sunshine Coast north of Brisbane to a regional centre closer to her two daughters. In doing that she left behind a fairly extensive network of friends that she had known for years. The girls are both very busy with their work and family lives but she does get to see the children more easily now. However, she misses her female friends.

She is working on making friends and she goes regularly to a seniors session at the local cinema where they serve a morning tea before the film and she has chummed up with a couple of ladies there. Another couple passing by her house stopped to say hello and invited my sister and her husband to visit their church. Sis and her hubby aren't interested in church but they now meet the couple regularly for luncheon at a club. While I was staying at her house recently I organised to meet someone from that area that I had encountered online. Me, Sis  and the forum friend hit it off over afternoon tea at a mall and I think a new friendship may have commenced.

I've never moved around so I cannot offer much from personal experience but I suspect that there are new friends out there that we haven't met yet. All that is necessary is a desire to find them. All the best to you and may you find what you are looking for.


----------



## SeaBreeze (Apr 25, 2018)

Ruthanne said:


> No, being a loner is not a good thing for a lot of reasons.  I am thinking of going to the Senior Center in town, I've not been there before. It may be fruitful!:love_heart:



Good for you Ruthanne, I would do it for sure.  Even if you don't want to continue to go there all the time, you may meet someone you like to take walks with or spend some time with outside of the center.  Hope if is fruitful.


----------



## Falcon (Apr 25, 2018)

Ruthanne,  Sometimes a move is a real eye-opener.  It's like starting to read a new book.  You meet new people, see new scenery etc.

If you move, I wish you a trouble FREE adventure.


----------



## fmdog44 (Apr 26, 2018)

Lots of people could use some company.


----------



## CindyLouWho (Apr 26, 2018)

fmdog44 said:


> Lots of people could use some company.


Yes, this is so true. 
Sometimes in life we find ourselves in situations we never dreamed we'd be in. This happened to me too, Ruthanne, so I can empathize with you. 
I wish I could come up with a way to bring like people together who are alone due to whatever situation or circumstances brought them to that point. 
We all, or most, anyway, could at some point use some help, emotional or otherwise, support getting through or at least adjusted to a situation, before we get back to where we were or better. 
Unfortunately, some don't have the support of family and/or friends and it's a painful lonely road, even if it does make you a stronger, tougher and more appreciative person in the end.
PM me, Ruthanne, if you ever feel like talking.


----------



## Ruthanne (Apr 27, 2018)

Warrigal said:


> My sister is in rather the opposite situation.
> 
> She has recently moved from a beach town on the Sunshine Coast north of Brisbane to a regional centre closer to her two daughters. In doing that she left behind a fairly extensive network of friends that she had known for years. The girls are both very busy with their work and family lives but she does get to see the children more easily now. However, she misses her female friends.
> 
> ...


Friends we haven't met yet-I like that and bet there must be!  Thank you, now to find my desire or motivation..:sentimental:



SeaBreeze said:


> Good for you Ruthanne, I would do it for sure.  Even if you don't want to continue to go there all the time, you may meet someone you like to take walks with or spend some time with outside of the center.  Hope if is fruitful.


Thank you SeaBreeze.


----------



## Ruthanne (Apr 27, 2018)

Falcon said:


> Ruthanne,  Sometimes a move is a real eye-opener.  It's like starting to read a new book.  You meet new people, see new scenery etc.
> 
> If you move, I wish you a trouble FREE adventure.


Thanks Falcon.  The only way I can move is if I hit the lottery..hahaha.  



fmdog44 said:


> Lots of people could use some company.


I bet!


CindyLouWho said:


> Yes, this is so true.
> Sometimes in life we find ourselves in situations we never dreamed we'd be in. This happened to me too, Ruthanne, so I can empathize with you.
> I wish I could come up with a way to bring like people together who are alone due to whatever situation or circumstances brought them to that point.
> We all, or most, anyway, could at some point use some help, emotional or otherwise, support getting through or at least adjusted to a situation, before we get back to where we were or better.
> ...


I appreciate your post and understanding.  It's not an easy path to be on, you are right.


----------



## fmdog44 (Apr 28, 2018)

Song title: "You're So Far Away".......... lyric:"doesn't anyone stay in one place anymore?"


----------



## Ruthanne (Apr 28, 2018)

fmdog44 said:


> Song title: "You're So Far Away".......... lyric:"doesn't anyone stay in one place anymore?"


Actually they were here most of their lives and now am going to be with their kids out west.


----------



## fmdog44 (Apr 28, 2018)

Ruthanne said:


> Actually they were here most of their lives and now am going to be with their kids out west.



That's good, families staying in the same town changed radically with the automobile and WWII. That makes loving your partner that much more important because when the kids leave you have gone back to the dating days only now married and living in the same house.


----------



## Ruthanne (Apr 28, 2018)

fmdog44 said:


> That's good, families staying in the same town changed radically with the automobile and WWII. That makes loving your partner that much more important because when the kids leave you have gone back to the dating days only now married and living in the same house.


My other family moved west last century and now the others are going, too.  If I could find a way to go with someone special I'd go, too!


----------

