# If you are the primary "bookkeeper"?



## Pecos (Jan 29, 2020)

I do the majority of the bookkeeping, banking, investment, and tax work around our house, but in recent weeks it has dawned on me that if my wife had to pick up these chores she would be seriously irritated that I had not organized things for a smooth transition. Other than her own checking account and credit card, she doesn't track anything and we have lots of accounts. I am going to have to get her to sit down and get familiar with our total financial picture.

My first major task is to organize my "website/password" spreadsheet so that it would be more intuitive. This is proving to be far more difficult than I expected as it involves moving all those penciled in passwords into an organized format. Some of these banking, financial, Medicare, social security, retirement accounts and etc require complicated passwords and require frequent updates; resulting in lots of penciled in new passwords. 

My second major task is to reorganize my paper files, and get rid of all the outdated crap in those files. Right now it is dreadful.

So do any of you who have gone through this exercise have any tips?

I expect to remain on the planet for many more years, but I sure would not want to saddle my wife with a record keeping nightmare.


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## TravelinMan (Jan 29, 2020)

_For website access you might want to consider an app to store all of you user names and passwords.  I have been using a free version called LastPass now for over a year and have had no problems and no real concerns.  It is very handy to logon to one web site then just be able to click an icon for each particular website I visit after that. I also have the app on my phone.

Yes, I have tried to show my wife how to access and use this app, but she is technology challenged.  Most all of our investment account statements are also stored in paper files.  Plus, she has the name of our financial adviser and he could help her._


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## C'est Moi (Jan 29, 2020)

My husband is our primary bookkeeper, but I am well aware of all the details, accounts, passwords, combination to our safe, etc.  It would be wise for every couple to go over these things for the future.


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## Ruth n Jersey (Jan 29, 2020)

I mentioned in another post that this was one of my New Years resolutions. I've always let my hubby take care of all the fiances. With his help I started this January 1st. I've been writing all the checks,paying all the bills and balancing the checkbook, something I've never done in my life. 
Also taking care of our savings etc. 

Its been hard but I'm learning. Not being good with numbers doesn't help the situation. I will continue because it is something I may have to do in the future. 

One thing that has helped is that everything is written down and he never did use the web for anything. 

I hope your wife continues learning about these things. I waited way to long but already I have some piece of mind.


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## Catlady (Jan 29, 2020)

As for passwords, I just type a list with name, ID, and password and then print it and save the document.  I pencil in any changes on the paper list and update the document list whenever.  My files are in a mess and I need to do major reorganizing and minimizing.

I think you're doing the right thing getting your wife to understand what and how you're doing.  Lots of women (and men) leave it all to the spouse and then feel lost when the spouse dies.


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## Aunt Bea (Jan 29, 2020)

I would include other things like deeds, car titles, insurance policies, etc...

For me, it is always easy to organize these things but I usually drop the ball on keeping them up to date.

It might be good to include your wife in the reorganization/purge so that things can be set up in a way that makes sense to her and is easy for her to help you keep up to date.

Good luck with this important project.


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## Duster (Jan 29, 2020)

It's a good idea to let your wife know where to find all your information.  She also needs to know about where you keep property deeds,  cemetery plot deeds, wills, living wills, property tax receipts, bank account, investment and IRA~401K, medicare+supplemental insurance, social security, and bill paying information.  My father did all the bill paying, taxes, etc.  When he had a heart attack/surgery it was hard on my mother trying to figure everything out, in addition to caring for him. Though he lived another 8 years, he was never able to take care of the household business again.  

We use a password book that has saved us from many headaches. They come in large print, too, or just get a small notebook and start recording that information. A dedicated address book could work, as well.  Just put the company name, website address, user name, account number, password, and other info as you access it.  A file works, too. If you only have the info on your phone, it could be lost or broken {broke mine once and couldn't get the info}.  It doesn't hurt to have the information in more than one place.


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## Floridatennisplayer (Jan 29, 2020)

I have everything organized for my sweet wife.  She does the checking account, pays the bills.  I’m the investor.  Have a Fidelity binder with everything easily spelled out for her.


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## Ladybj (Jan 29, 2020)

Pecos said:


> I do the majority of the bookkeeping, banking, investment, and tax work around our house, but in recent weeks it has dawned on me that if my wife had to pick up these chores she would be seriously irritated that I had not organized things for a smooth transition. Other than her own checking account and credit card, she doesn't track anything and we have lots of accounts. I am going to have to get her to sit down and get familiar with our total financial picture.
> 
> My first major task is to organize my "website/password" spreadsheet so that it would be more intuitive. This is proving to be far more difficult than I expected as it involves moving all those penciled in passwords into an organized format. Some of these banking, financial, Medicare, social security, retirement accounts and etc require complicated passwords and require frequent updates; resulting in lots of penciled in new passwords.
> 
> ...


You may not want to saddle her with record keeping nightmare but some things happen beyond our control.  Sounds like you have things organized so it may not be so much of a nightmare if she has to take over.


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## Myquest55 (Jan 29, 2020)

Years ago I realized that my husband, working the long hours he did, had no real conception of where our money was nor how much we had saved or WHERE it was saved.  He fretted over the fact that we would never have enough to retire.  As our sons grew up and (eventually) moved out, my first thought was "what if something happened to both of us?"  I began to collect information into a binder, I labeled "THE BOOK."  I included a statement from every account we have.  I created sections:  Insurance, Savings, Retirement, Debt.   At the front I typed a multi-page list of every place we have an account, the Rep's name, account numbers,  and phone numbers.  Thinking of everything they might have to do once we're gone, I eventually added Doctors, The vet, the oil company, and everyone else I could think of that they would need to notify.

Once that was done, poor husband was still not comprehending the whole situation so I began to create a spreadsheet.  Watching a TV show, one night, I wondered if we had to -  would we be able to come up with ransom money? (I know - just laugh now) but that caused me to wonder about our "cash" situation.  So, I began with that.  If we needed cash - what accounts could we access?
Savings (I never include checking - too fluid)
Savings bond
Stocks we own
Investment accounts  ( I keep $$ split between two firms)
Cash value of life insurance
   Next section was Retirement Accounts
IRA accounts
Roth IRA accounts
Pension
401K 
    I could total each section and add them together for a grand total.  I update it frequently with statements and MarketWatch stock prices - keeping it to a beginning amount - Year-to-Date at Jun 30 and Dec 30.

THIS was something he could hold and look at and study and although I created this is 2011 - THIS year, he actually said he finally comprehends what its all about and what it means.  We have used it to plan retirement - he had to take Disability earlier than we planned.  The Financial guys at Prudential and Thrivent have practically hugged & kissed me when I've showed it to them and we have been able to ease into retirement with their help!!  The Spreadsheet has evolved a little.  I have added debt, projected Soc. Sec., we have projected estimated retirement expenses and and it has helped us plan which accounts to tap for income first.

I hope this helps.  Keep it simple but think of what your wife would need to do first.  I also have THE BOX - which holds the actual policies, passports, birth certificates, etc .  GOOD LUCK!!


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## Ladybj (Jan 29, 2020)

Myquest55 said:


> Years ago I realized that my husband, working the long hours he did, had no real conception of where our money was nor how much we had saved or WHERE it was saved.  He fretted over the fact that we would never have enough to retire.  As our sons grew up and (eventually) moved out, my first thought was "what if something happened to both of us?"  I began to collect information into a binder, I labeled "THE BOOK."  I included a statement from every account we have.  I created sections:  Insurance, Savings, Retirement, Debt.   At the front I typed a multi-page list of every place we have an account, the Rep's name, account numbers,  and phone numbers.  Thinking of everything they might have to do once we're gone, I eventually added Doctors, The vet, the oil company, and everyone else I could think of that they would need to notify.
> 
> Once that was done, poor husband was still not comprehending the whole situation so I began to create a spreadsheet.  Watching a TV show, one night, I wondered if we had to -  would we be able to come up with ransom money? (I know - just laugh now) but that caused me to wonder about our "cash" situation.  So, I began with that.  If we needed cash - what accounts could we access?
> Savings (I never include checking - too fluid)
> ...


I handle paying bills.  Hubby puts a certain amount in my account each pay period... I retired therefore I have income deposited in my account as well.  He also has me listed on several of his accounts in the event something happens to him.  It's a lot to think about.  I don't stress over it..  I am at the mind set that as long as I am breathing, I will be AOK .


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## Ladybj (Jan 29, 2020)

C'est Moi said:


> My husband is our primary bookkeeper, but I am well aware of all the details, accounts, passwords, combination to our safe, etc.  It would be wise for every couple to go over these things for the future.


I AGREE 101 percent


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## mikermeals (Feb 2, 2020)

I had a wierd conversation with both of our grown children the day before an oversees trip my wife and I took last year.  It was short and sweet but told them where our will was and a list of all of our assets and where they are held.  I am the primary bookkeeper but my wife has a good understanding of what we have and where it is held. She can also refer to the list we have for our kids.   It is not very romantic but every New Years eve we go over our financial plan and how we did the year before and what our plans are for the future.  We've been doing this for 10 years and has become a fun project (for me at least).


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## Nautilus (Feb 2, 2020)

My wife handles all the money.  Always has.  I'm clueless and content.


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## OneEyedDiva (Feb 2, 2020)

My second husband wasn't involved in any aspect of my finances *at all*. I have my passwords, in coded form, listed in Google documents.  My son and oldest grandson have copies of the ones they would need for business and financial reasons should I become incapacitated and when I pass. They fully understand how my coding system works.  No one else would be able to figure it out.  I have another document listing what financial institutions and brokerages I deal with, again...shared with them. 

I also have Google spreadsheets that show my quarterly net worth listed by investment ticker symbols and what types of accounts (Roths, Traditional IRA and non-IRAs).  Another lists my checking and savings accounts and yet another shows who inherits what percentage of those accounts, as designated with the brokerages, after I transition. I've developed the system over time so now it's easy to maintain and update.  Every 6 months, I review the information with them which I found is a good thing because some things my son had forgotten.  BTW, he also has the power of attorney and his own login for my main brokerage account. 

I would say don't put off starting any longer, no matter how daunting. Life is not promised to us for the next day. Every woman should know how to manage money, including every penny that's in accounts, insurance policies, the whole nine. She may not get it all the first time or even the second time.  Sit with her until she does.  Also, you might consider consolidating some of your accounts.  I did so to make it easier for my son and grandson.  It's bad enough being grief stricken besides having to sort through a whole bunch of financial things.


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