# I really am about to lose it



## Katybug (Jan 22, 2014)

The Xanax has worn off and I just popped the other half....but I can't quit obsessing with this.

I have a small lil something in my mouth.  It's not on my tongue, but near where the tongue connects.  It's been there for a couple weeks and won't go away.  It isn't irritated at all and is very small, but you know what I'm thinking and it's not good.  I know what Phil says, but it's impossible not to think the worst.  

Going through cancer w/my daughter (tongue) and what she has been through with nightmare radiation...well, I'm nauseated with worry.  Have an appt w/my dentist tomorrow morning (had a full visit 3 mos ago) and we'll go from there. In the meantime, I am one big mess.  I'm headed to Target and some groc shopping, then meeting someone for dinner to try and take my mind off it, darned near impossible.  Please wish me good luck!  I need it!


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## Vivjen (Jan 22, 2014)

Good luck, of course; but you are doing everything you possibly can.
i won't say 'stop worrying', because there is nothing else you can do until tomorrow.
My thoughts are with you, (been there, done that....)


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## TICA (Jan 22, 2014)

Good luck!   You only need to try and forget it for tonight if you have a dentists appt tomorrow so go out and enjoy your evening.


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## Old Hipster (Jan 22, 2014)

Oh Katy, good luck. I am a WORRIER big time too and my own worst enemy. Please do your best to try and remain calm. Take a lot of deep breaths, that helps me sometimes.


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## Ina (Jan 22, 2014)

Hi Katybug,  I've gone through abdominal cancer twice, and that was 35 years ago, first with radiation, second with kemo. The great thing is that science has come a long long way since then. Your biggest enemy is the fear. A positive attitude is the best thing for your immune system. Being here on this site is a great way to build your positivity factor. Good luck and let us know, one way or the other.


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## Ozarkgal (Jan 22, 2014)

Katy, Ina is right.  The biggest fear is of the unknown, once you find out what it is, good or bad you'll deal with it.  I know you have some wine around there.  Have a couple of glasses and a nice warm bubble bath and try to relax and focus on positive things. This too shall pass.


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## gar (Jan 22, 2014)

Try not to worry. This from Gary who s**ts a brick every time I get a pain etc.


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## Diwundrin (Jan 22, 2014)

Oh Katy, there is no point in telling you not to worry about this until you have to is there?   You will anyway.  Okay then, we'll worry a little along with you until you get it checked out but we also know that all manner of odd things happen to us as we age. Lumps and bumps and changes and pains that can scare the hell the out of us but are just par for the course. So be concerned, but not panicky.... okay?


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## CeeCee (Jan 22, 2014)

By tomorrow this time hopefully it will be nothing.  Hope the other half Xanax works.   Hugs


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## CeeCee (Jan 22, 2014)

Hope you don't mind but I emailed your post to my daughter, son and dil.

This is my daughters reply....

Most cases turn out to be nothing.  In my 17 years of practice I haven't come across oral cancer yet.


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## SeaBreeze (Jan 22, 2014)

Good luck CeeCee, try to chill out tonight...sending good thoughts your way. :love_heart:


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## CeeCee (Jan 22, 2014)

It's Katy that is worried tonight SeaBreeze...I was the basket case yesterday.

I just emailed my kids Katy's post because they are dentists and was trying to put her mind at ease a little.


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## SeaBreeze (Jan 22, 2014)

My apologies Katy, got mixed up there.   Thanks CeeCee for setting me straight.


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## Diwundrin (Jan 22, 2014)

CeeCee said:


> Hope you don't mind but I emailed your post to my daughter, son and dil.
> 
> This is my daughters reply....
> 
> Most cases turn out to be nothing.  In my 17 years of practice I haven't come across oral cancer yet.



Well done CeeCee. 



 Katy?  You read that?  Too early to fret.


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## CeeCee (Jan 22, 2014)

And this is the reply from my son....


Irritation fibroma. Nothing to worry about.


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## CeeCee (Jan 22, 2014)

Just want to add that they didn't look in your mouth but their replies are promising, and hopefully will allow you a decent nights sleep.


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## Katybug (Jan 22, 2014)

CeeCee said:


> Hope you don't mind but I emailed your post to my daughter, son and dil.
> 
> This is my daughters reply....
> 
> Most cases turn out to be nothing.  In my 17 years of practice I haven't come across oral cancer yet.



Grateful for all these supportive responses, but this one is so encouraging.  I know she's a dentist and that is the best news I could hear!  I sincerely appreciate your e-mailing her, CeeCee, and it will definitely help me sleep better.  Thanks to all of you for your concern.


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## Katybug (Jan 22, 2014)

CeeCee said:


> And this is the reply from my son....
> 
> 
> *Irritation fibroma. Nothing to worry about.*


Oh my gosh, how I wish I'd been home earlier to read this.  It would have saved an evening of genuine worried concern.  And Irritation fibroma...nothing to worry about has almost put me over the moon!!!   I'm so hoping my dentist repeats those exact words to me when I see him tomorrow a.m..  I'm not working 'til afternoon, so you may hear me yelling it from the dentist's rooftop if that's the case.  What a worrier I am, but given what I've been through (mastectomy 21 yrs ago) and the oral and lymph node cancer with my daughter for the last 2 yrs gives me paranoid rights that I'm entitled to, just want cancer gone and everybody to be happy.  

Thank you again, friend CeeCee, for sharing those beautiful responses from your kids. Just what I was desperate to hear.   It made my night and then some!  I sincerely appreciate it!

Just to know it's not automatically cancer, as I thought it was is such a relief (tho I know this has to be confirmed locally, but now I have hope.  I had none before.)  I am extremely grateful, CeeCee.  You did you part well, went to the source and got valued inside info for a new friend, for which I am eternally grateful.  

I'm not just pulling this out of the air....If you only knew what my poor daughter has been through not once, but twice in 2 years (2nd cancer surgery  was in lymph node from the original oral cancer and that ended up being 2 gawdawful surgeries. Not to mention it's a full  2 year recovery period (meaning you have mouth ulcers/sores/yeast infected mouth..ONGOING...it hasn't stopped for a year.  We're halfway through with 1 yr down, 1 to go. They told her it was the worst possible cancer to treat/inside mouth that's out there so far as doing radiation (torching) your face, inside your mouth, throat, esophagus...You get the picture and I was convinced I had the same thing.....and so were half the friends I told today.  They weren't positive at all.  In any event, Alisa lost 22 lbs from a 110 frame and has been unable to swallow very many foods.  That hasn't changed very much.  Oh God, I can't think about it any longer, but I've been thinking a lot about mine today and realize I've become completely paranoid about it.  After CeeCee's children's input, I'm thinking, "Thank God, now I'm going to bed & stop worrying."
Perhaps I'll have more to worry about tomorrow, but today has been more that I could ever express.  

 Thank you so very much for sharing that, CC, it means more than I can ever tell you.  You couldn't have done anything that would have been more appreciated.  Have yourself a wonderful evening and I can wait to share my dentists' findings, just hoping it will be nearly as positive. (No one in my family knows, so you all are my only confidantes.)  Again, sincerest thanks for your input.


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## Gracie (Jan 22, 2014)

Prayers are with you.


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## Judi.D (Jan 23, 2014)

Good luck Katy, my thought are with you.


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## Ozarkgal (Jan 23, 2014)

Yes, Katy, ditto!


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## Jillaroo (Jan 23, 2014)

_Good luck Katy i'm sure all will be fine_


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## Old Hipster (Jan 23, 2014)

Good luck Katy and CeeCee you are the Best!


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## Warrigal (Jan 23, 2014)

Thinking of you, Katybug.
May all go well with the examination.


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## Katybug (Jan 23, 2014)

Old Hipster said:


> Good luck Katy and
> 
> *CeeCee you are the Best*!



She really is, as I always think the worst and wasn't aware of possible non-invasive issues.  Still, I don't think given my history, tho he's been my dentist for years, that he is going to want to take the responsibility of saying this is absolutely, positively not a problem. But still hoping for strong reassurance of "almost sure there is no problem," as he directs me to an oral surgeon. With only an hour before leaving, I'm nervous Nellie.


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## CeeCee (Jan 23, 2014)

Good luck today, Katy....praying for you in my special way.


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## Katybug (Jan 23, 2014)

CeeCee said:


> Good luck today, Katy....praying for you in my special way.



Thank you, my dear, you've been a blessing through this.


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## CeeCee (Jan 23, 2014)

I understand what you are going through!!


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## Old Hipster (Jan 23, 2014)

Katybug said:


> She really is, as I always think the worst and wasn't aware of possible non-invasive issues.  Still, I don't think given my history, tho he's been my dentist for years, that he is going to want to take the responsibility of saying this is absolutely, positively not a problem. But still hoping for strong reassurance of "almost sure there is no problem," as he directs me to an oral surgeon. With only an hour before leaving, I'm nervous Nellie.


Katy I am the same damn way, if something is wrong, physically, I instantly think of the worst case scenario and run with it.

I can understand what you are going through. We will all be anxiously awaiting your return form the Dentist.


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## CeeCee (Jan 23, 2014)

Katy, he may still direct you to an oral surgeon whether he thinks it's cancer or not, they always cover their a**es...malpractice suits are always on their mind.  They all have malpractice insurance but it makes them look bad when someone checks their record when looking for a new dentist.


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## CeeCee (Jan 23, 2014)

Old Hipster said:


> Katy I am the same damn way, if something is wrong, physically, I instantly think of the worst case scenario and run with it.
> 
> I can understand what you are going through. We will all be anxiously awaiting your return form the Dentist.



i am probably the worst, I got bent out of shape with a routine blood test...results should be back soon hoping I don't get a call.


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## Jackie22 (Jan 23, 2014)

Hope all goes well for both you ladies... I've had two people in my family that had to have oral minor surgery for some kind of clogged glands in the mouth.


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## CeeCee (Jan 23, 2014)

I am anxiously waiting for Katy to get back and tell us all is well!

Have to go out but will be checking my iPhone periodically ...although the forum is not the easiest thing to read on there.


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## Katybug (Jan 23, 2014)

*Woo Hoo!*  It was a blocked salavia gland.  His assistant gave me a heads up before the dentist came in and confirmed. They're very common he said.  I would have cut cartwheels out of the office if I were able.  I celebrated by meeting a friend for lunch who was nice enough to pick up the check.  So many wonderful people in this world!

Thank you all so much for caring, and CeeCee, you're Queen of my day!  A very special thank you to  you.


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## Old Hipster (Jan 23, 2014)

Katybug said:


> *Woo Hoo!* It was a blocked salaviary gland. His assistant gave me a heads up before my dentist came in and confirmed. I would have cut cartwheels out of the office if I were able. I celebrated by meeting a friend for lunch who was nice enough to pick up the check. So many wonderful people in this world!
> 
> Thank you all so much for caring, and CeeCee, you're Queen of my day! A very special thank you to you.


That bears repeating.
I am so HAPPY for you!

:happy::woohoo1::happy:


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## Vivjen (Jan 23, 2014)

So pleased for you Katybug.


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## CeeCee (Jan 23, 2014)

WOOHOO is right, I am soooo happy for you, Katy!!


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## Ina (Jan 23, 2014)

See Katy, positive thinking. I've been holding a positive prayer in my thoughts for you since you told us yesterday.


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## Ozarkgal (Jan 23, 2014)

Good news, Katy..I could hear that deep sigh of relief from here!


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## Pappy (Jan 23, 2014)

So, so happy for you, Katybug. layful: :sentimental:


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## Katybug (Jan 23, 2014)

You all have no idea how much your support means.....I told NO ONE else, not even the friend who took me to lunch today.  I felt as if talking about it would jinx me, but last minute reached out on the board.  It felt so good to get it out and even more to read all your posts.  Many thanks to each of you. :bighug:


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## CeeCee (Jan 23, 2014)

That's why I like being a member of a senior forum, you meet new people even if only online, you learn new things and you will find that they are there for you when you need it and sometimes you can tell them more then you would tell your kids...a good place to unload.

I bet you will sleep like a baby tonight!


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## Jackie22 (Jan 23, 2014)

Great news, Katy.


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## Gracie (Jan 23, 2014)

Happy news, hon.


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## Mrs. Robinson (Jan 23, 2014)

I am only seeing this now,being new and all. When I first read your post,my first thought was "blocked salivary gland." Had one myself,my dad had one once and my son had one once. Of course,with your daughter`s history,of course you thought the worst! I would have too! Sleep well tonight!


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## Katybug (Jan 23, 2014)

CeeCee said:


> That's why I like being a member of a senior forum, you meet new people even if only online, you learn new things and you will find that they are there for you when you need it and sometimes you can tell them more then you would tell your kids...a good place to unload.
> 
> I bet you will sleep like a baby tonight!



Interesting and many opinions as to how much easier it is to share with on-line friends than those you know in real life.  The first person I called was my daughter who has been through it...from the  dentists' parking lot.  Couldn't wait to share the good news with her.  

For sure, tonight is light years from last night...whew!


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## Katybug (Jan 23, 2014)

Mrs. Robinson said:


> I am only seeing this now,being new and all. When I first read your post,my first thought was "blocked salivary gland." Had one myself,my dad had one once and my son had one once. Of course,with your daughter`s history,of course you thought the worst! I would have too! Sleep well tonight!



You nailed it, Mrs R, my daughter's issue (plus I'm a 21 yr survivor as well) was doing me in. Mouth cancer is very rare, but when you've dealt with it first hand for 2 yrs you automatically fear the worst.  Feels so good w/the weight lifted.


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## Warrigal (Jan 23, 2014)

Good news for you, Katybug, is good news for us too.

:love_heart:


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## Sunny (Jan 23, 2014)

Very good news, Katy. What a relief.


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## Diwundrin (Jan 23, 2014)

Great news Katy, you worry wort!  

  But that's okay, that's what we're here for, to share our fears and achievements.  You worry along with us any time you feel the need.


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## Casper (Jan 23, 2014)

_*Katy, I'm glad the news was good for you.:woohoo:*_


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## SeaBreeze (Jan 23, 2014)

Very happy your news was good Katy! :girl_hug:


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## Jillaroo (Jan 23, 2014)

_That's great news Katy, i also had good news today my Xray came back clear after worrying something sinister was going on after the heavy fall i had 2 weeks ago_


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## Casper (Jan 23, 2014)

_*That's very good news Jilly.....now you can stop worrying.......:bighug:

I'm the same, it's always in the back of your mind.
*_


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## Jillaroo (Jan 24, 2014)

_Dad had cancerous tumours on his back and i was concerned i might have them too, still not convinced it's a pulled muscle though_


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## That Guy (Jan 24, 2014)

Blocked saliva gland?  This is why the dentist tells us to SPIT!


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## Katybug (Jan 24, 2014)

Jillaroo said:


> _That's great news Katy, i also had good news today my Xray came back clear after worrying something sinister was going on after the heavy fall i had 2 weeks ago_



It's the worrying that gets us, Jilly.  So glad to hear the good news!


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## Katybug (Jan 24, 2014)

That Guy said:


> Blocked saliva gland?  This is why the dentist tells us to SPIT!




LOL  I don't ever spit unless I have toothpaste in my mouth.  Maybe that was my problem all along!


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## Ina (Jan 24, 2014)

Katy, spitting can be sport, so work out. I'm happy we have the chance to tease you, instead of worrying about you. Much better feeling.


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## Katybug (Jan 24, 2014)

May or may not be a southern thing, but I wouldn't spit in public if you were holding a gun on me.  LOl


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## TICA (Jan 25, 2014)

I'm just catching up after being off line for a few days but I'm sooooo glad to hear that both Katy and Jillie have nothing serious wrong.

Good news is always the BEST news.


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## Jillaroo (Jan 25, 2014)

_It churns my stomach when a man spits on the ground near me, it's a disgusting habit if they need to spit do it in a hanky, we don't need to see it on the ground._:eeew:


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## Ozarkgal (Jan 25, 2014)

Jilly...so relieved to hear you had positive news.  I was getting worried when we didn't hear back from you for a while.  Pulled muscles can sometimes take a long time to heal. Did the doctor give you any muscle relaxers?



Katybug said:


> May or may not be a southern thing, but I wouldn't spit in public if you were holding a gun on me.  LOl



May be a southern thing for ladies, but so much for men.   Many men around here chew tobacco and they have no reservation about spitting the overload of brown saliva on the ground right next to you while you're talking to them.  Makes me want to hurl..It's not uncommon for them to carry cups around in their trucks to spit in either...gross!!

Katy, what do they do for a blocked salivary gland?


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## That Guy (Jan 25, 2014)

Ozarkgal said:


> Katy, what do they do for a blocked salivary gland?


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## Katybug (Jan 26, 2014)

Jillaroo said:


> _It churns my stomach when a man spits on the ground near me, it's a disgusting habit if they need to spit do it in a hanky, we don't need to see it on the ground._:eeew:



Ditto, Jilly.  I haven't had a chance to be on the board much.  Please tell us things are going well, or well as can be expected.


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## Old Hipster (Jan 26, 2014)

Yes spitting makes me sick, sometimes when I gas up my car, well all the time, there are loogies all over the place. Jeeezsus it is beyond disgusting!

Hang in there Jilli, I am having shoulder problems too and it is taking FOREVER to feel better. Had x-rays as well, but of course that doesn't show soft tissue damage, but time will tell I guess.


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## Katybug (Jan 26, 2014)

Jillaroo said:


> _That's great news Katy, i also had good news today my Xray came back clear after worrying something sinister was going on after the heavy fall i had 2 weeks ago_



Wonderful and then some, Jilly.  So glad to hear that!


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## Katybug (Jan 26, 2014)

Ozarkgal said:


> Jilly...so relieved to hear you had positive news.  I was getting worried when we didn't hear back from you for a while.  Pulled muscles can sometimes take a long time to heal. Did the doctor give you any muscle relaxers?
> 
> 
> 
> ...



Didn't know this, OG, but they're very common.  There is a seed that should come out, or not a big deal if it doesn't.  The dentist attempted to get it, but it's in such an awkward place.  I want to let it work itself out since it's not serious, and otherwise it may involve a tiny knife!  Not going that route if it isn't bothering anything.


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