# American Communication



## Tabby Ann (Jul 12, 2021)

There is an idiotic robotic nature to local communication that didn't exist when I was growing up. Store clerks were there to be seen and not heard and provide help if asked. Today however, they rush at you from every nook and cranny repeating How are you today? How are you today? But if you ask them a question about the location of a store product, they are clueless and stunned that you should ask. This even extends to bank tellers, which was once a dignified profession. One cold snowy day I went thru the drive-thru and rolled my window down only long enough to place my deposit in the pneumatic tube then rolled it back up.  Shortly after I heard mumbling and talking coming from the drive-thru speakers. I rolled my window back down and exposed myself to the snowy elements only to hear a teller repeating How are you today? How are you today?  Incredulous, I rolled the window back up without responding. Is this a national trend across America or just limited to here in Indiana?


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## officerripley (Jul 12, 2021)

Tabby Ann said:


> There is an idiotic robotic nature to local communication that didn't exist when I was growing up. Store clerks were there to be seen and not heard and provide help if asked. Today however, they rush at you from every nook and cranny repeating How are you today? How are you today? But if you ask them a question about the location of a store product, they are clueless and stunned that you should ask. This even extends to bank tellers, which was once a dignified profession. One cold snowy day I went thru the drive-thru and rolled my window down only long enough to place my deposit in the pneumatic tube then rolled it back up.  Shortly after I heard mumbling and talking coming from the drive-thru speakers. I rolled my window back down and exposed myself to the snowy elements only to hear a teller repeating How are you today? How are you today?  Incredulous, I rolled the window back up without responding. Is this a national trend across America or just limited to here in Indiana?


I think it's a national trend. I think part of the reason is that employees such as store clerks, bank tellers, everybody, are being pushed by their corporate overlords to cheerfully sell, sell, sell. So it's not enough for a poor bank teller, for instance, to just do their job of helping you with your accounts; they're supposed to "sell" you a CD, loan, etc. Sad times, IMO.


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## Aneeda72 (Jul 12, 2021)

Tabby Ann said:


> There is an idiotic robotic nature to local communication that didn't exist when I was growing up. Store clerks were there to be seen and not heard and provide help if asked. Today however, they rush at you from every nook and cranny repeating How are you today? How are you today? But if you ask them a question about the location of a store product, they are clueless and stunned that you should ask. This even extends to bank tellers, which was once a dignified profession. One cold snowy day I went thru the drive-thru and rolled my window down only long enough to place my deposit in the pneumatic tube then rolled it back up.  Shortly after I heard mumbling and talking coming from the drive-thru speakers. I rolled my window back down and exposed myself to the snowy elements only to hear a teller repeating How are you today? How are you today?  Incredulous, I rolled the window back up without responding. Is this a national trend across America or just limited to here in Indiana?


What’s funny is they could not care less about how you are, but hey, I’ve got lots of time so when I am asked how I am, I tell them how I am, takes a bit cause I am not well.  The look on their faces is quite humorous


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## SmoothSeas (Jul 12, 2021)

when confronted with someone attempting to upsell me something, I respond with save your breath, and that I still retain the presence of mind to do my own homework...

it's so damn irritating...


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## Knight (Jul 12, 2021)

Always a silver lining. 

How are you today sure beats  the really rude total indifference to a person there needing something.  

I think it's a general greeting that the person asking doesn't really expect an answer to. I'd like to have a dollar for every time I've replied  I'm good how about you? For sure I don't expect a reply describing how they are.


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## JustBonee (Jul 12, 2021)

Some years back, when my husband was still living,  we stopped at the neighborhood Walgreens one afternoon .. and  I warned my husband ahead of time,  about the overly aggressive clerks.
Well, we walk in .."Can I help you" .. " just looking",  we go around the aisle "Can I Help you"  ..." no, looking'' .....  a couple more aisles,  and a couple more "Can I help you".
Then  I get to a shelf where I wanted to check something out ... I move a bottle on the the shelf ..  and lo and behold  .. a person behind the shelving   sticks their head through,   and said one more time. Can I help you   ..... I just said let's get out of here!
Never went back to Walgreens.  Whenever I go past their closed up store,  I  think of that day ..


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## Aneeda72 (Jul 12, 2021)

Knight said:


> Always a silver lining.
> 
> How are you today sure beats  the really rude total indifference to a person there needing something.
> 
> I think it's a general greeting that the person asking doesn't really expect an answer to. I'd like to have a dollar for every time I've replied  I'm good how about you? For sure I don't expect a reply describing how they are.


Of course you don’t and neither do they, which is why if they persist, I tell them how I am and as the gazed look appears in their eyes and they excuse themselves I smile and say we will talk again soon.


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## Aneeda72 (Jul 12, 2021)

Bonnie said:


> It's been going on for some years around here.
> I actually feel like this behavior has caused our local Walgreens  Drug Store to close,  sooner rather than later. ...  just one example:
> ..
> Some years back, when my husband was still living,  we stopped at the neighborhood Walgreens one afternoon .. and  I even warned my husband ahead of time about the overly aggressive clerks,   and how times had changed  in the stores since he had been there.
> ...


Well, I just say yes and ask if they do windows-.  Store clerks tend to remember me and stay away


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## Ken N Tx (Jul 13, 2021)

I saw a clerks image standing behind me in the store window, when he asked if he could help me a turned around with my finger in my nose and said no thanks I got it!!


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## hollydolly (Jul 13, 2021)

Bonnie said:


> Some years back, when my husband was still living,  we stopped at the neighborhood Walgreens one afternoon .. and  I warned my husband ahead of time,  about the overly aggressive clerks.
> Well, we walk in .."Can I help you" .. " just looking",  we go around the aisle "Can I Help you"  ..." no, looking'' .....  a couple more aisles,  and a couple more "Can I help you".
> Then  I get to a shelf where I wanted to check something out ... I move a bottle on the the shelf ..  and lo and behold  .. a person behind the shelving   sticks their head through,   and said one more time. Can I help you   ..... I just said let's get out of here!
> Never went back to Walgreens.  Whenever I go past their closed up store,  I  think of that day ..


My o/h is like that too.. if he's asked more than once if he needs help.. he'll leave the store without buying anything..

What irritates me more is the robotic question when I get to the checkout till.. for example in a clothing store..or shoe shop.. and they say.. ''did you find everything you needed today''.. ?

''No'' says I.. couldn't find X,Y or Z

'Oh'.. says the cashier .. and that's the end of the conversation.. 

When I worked in retail after leaving school.. we were always taught that the customer was king, and if we didn't have anything in stock, it was instantly ordered for the customer, and we would call them  when that item came into store..

Nowadays they couldn't care less, stores don't train their staff in customer service any more..


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## Keesha (Jul 13, 2021)

Ewwww!


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## Lewkat (Jul 13, 2021)

Conversely, I dislike walking into a store and having to run all over the place to either find someone to assist me or even check me out.


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## JonDouglas (Jul 13, 2021)

I can remember back when some of the most obnoxious and pushy personnel were in auto dealerships.  Walk in and they were all over you like flies on something unseemly.  The trend these days, at least in the dealers I go into for whatever, is for someone to notice you, say "Let me know if I can be of help" and then leave you alone.   Some dealers have figured out that trying to sell someone a car when they're just coming into buy wiper blades can have a negative outcome.


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## Alligatorob (Jul 13, 2021)

Tabby Ann said:


> How are you today?


How are you in our language is really a greeting more akin to hello than a real question.  And our standard answers like "fine and you" are not thought out, just a quick return greeting.  My grandfather always used to answer with "no better" or "no worse". I like to  use that sometimes now, gets interesting reactions, reminds people they really are asking a question.


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## JustBonee (Jul 13, 2021)

hollydolly said:


> My o/h is like that too.. if he's asked more than once if he needs help.. he'll leave the store without buying anything..
> 
> *What irritates me more is the robotic question when I get to the checkout till.. for example in a clothing store..or shoe shop.. and they say.. ''did you find everything you needed today''.. ?
> 
> ...



EXACTLY  .... they are robots!!    ..they are told to  ask,  but they aren't given any instruction as to what to say next ...


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## Tommy (Jul 13, 2021)

Tabby Ann said:


> Is this a national trend across America or just limited to here in Indiana?


Yes, Tabby Ann.  I do believe that, as a group, people in some geographic areas tend by nature to seem more indifferent or disinterested.  But there are so many other variables - urban or rural, the type of business, the nature of the interaction, the unique nature of the parties involved ... many, many more.  The thing is, that's is just the way society works.

You may not be able to do much about the actions of others but you CAN manage YOUR reactions to them.  Instead of being judgemental you, might do well to try to think of them as real people who have the normal panoply of personal cares and concerns that we all carry with us.  If you were to show a bit of kindness and respect for them, actually care about them a bit, you might be surprised at the result.


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## Alligatorob (Jul 13, 2021)

hollydolly said:


> What irritates me more is the robotic question when I get to the checkout till.. for example in a clothing store..or shoe shop.. and they say.. ''did you find everything you needed today''.. ?
> 
> ''No'' says I.. couldn't find X,Y or Z


I like that, sometimes I am tempted to answer with something like "no and you don't sell what I really need".  Might try your answer first.


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## hollydolly (Jul 13, 2021)

officerripley said:


> I think it's a national trend. I think part of the reason is that employees such as store clerks, bank tellers, everybody, are being pushed by their corporate overlords to cheerfully sell, sell, sell. So it's not enough for a poor bank teller, for instance, to just do their job of helping you with your accounts; they're supposed to "sell" you a CD, loan, etc. Sad times, IMO.


..and at the opposite end of the scale in stores where it would be prudent of them to 'sell, sell,sell'' they are simply not interested..

One of the more irritating things I find now in recent times, is going into a store,  and not finding what I want or in fact what they're advertising..( a Blue cardigan for example)..only to be told that I need to buy it online... ?.. what?.. here in the UK 99 % of parking is expensive... to take time to drive to a store, pay to park and then for them not to have it in stock.. and be told in the disinterested  voice of a robot, that I can buy it online.. is infuriating..

if everyone does that none of these people will have a job...


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## Aneeda72 (Jul 13, 2021)

hollydolly said:


> ..and at the opposite end of the scale in stores where it would be prudent of them to 'sell, sell,sell'' they are simply not interested..
> 
> One of the more irritating things I find now in recent times, is going into a store,  and not finding what I want or in fact what they're advertising..( a Blue cardigan for example)..only to be told that I need to buy it online... ?.. what?.. here in the UK 99 % of parking is expensive... to take time to drive to a store, pay to park and then for them not to have it in stock.. and be told in the disinterested  voice of a robot, that I can buy it online.. is infuriating..
> 
> if everyone does that none of these people will have a job...


That just amazes me.  Most parking here is free at both the malls and strip malls.  You only pay for parking in large metro cities


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## hollydolly (Jul 13, 2021)

Aneeda72 said:


> That just amazes me.  Most parking here is free at both the malls and strip malls.  You only pay for parking in large metro cities


Unfortunately not the case here.. space is at such a premium in towns & cities, that we have to pay to park otherwise people will use what available space there is to park all day while they're at work for example.. in the streets.. and supermarket car parks.. 

Some Supermarkets will allow a certain time free ( sainsbury one of our largest supermarkets allows 15 minutes free.. and then if you spend more than £10 you don't have to pay up to 3 hours,  otherwise the first hour is £2, then it goes up in increments of 1 hour....

Aldi is free for just an hour and a half, and then you must leave or face a £70 fine

All our Multi-storey car parks are very expensive...

Common for them to cost around £15 per hour... ...


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## hollydolly (Jul 13, 2021)

Fortunately our public transport system in England  is abundant & cheap so it's usually quicker & cheaper to travel by tube, train, or bus.. to save on parking and petrol costs...but here in the villages we only have rural buses, .and no tubes or trains..

To get to the city, we either drive..( 20 miles but because of the volume of traffic it's long and tortuous and can take anything up to 3 hours to get to central London on a bad day).. so we drive to the nearest train station and take the 1/2 hour trip to London that way..


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## Tabby Ann (Jul 13, 2021)

Tommy said:


> You may not be able to do much about the actions of others but you CAN manage YOUR reactions to them. Instead of being judgemental you, might do well to try to think of them as real people who have the normal panoply of personal cares and concerns that we all carry with us. If you were to show a bit of kindness and respect for them, actually care about them a bit, you might be surprised at the result.


And your remark to me is not judgemental???


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## Tabby Ann (Jul 13, 2021)

hollydolly said:


> What irritates me more is the robotic question when I get to the checkout till.. for example in a clothing store..or shoe shop.. and they say.. ''did you find everything you needed today''.. ?
> 
> ''No'' says I.. couldn't find X,Y or Z
> 
> 'Oh'.. says the cashier .. and that's the end of the conversation..


At a Target store the cashier said "Did you find everything you were looking for?"  I said "No". He said your total is $49.98 and that was the end of the conversation. He never asked what I was looking for.


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## Tabby Ann (Jul 13, 2021)

Aneeda72 said:


> What’s funny is they could not care less about how you are, but hey, I’ve got lots of time so when I am asked how I am, I tell them how I am, takes a bit cause I am not well. The look on their faces is quite humorous


I went to a CVS Pharmacy to look at meds for my spring allergies which include sneezing and coughing spasms. I had one such spasm after I entered the front door and a clerk stocking shelves way across the other side of the store yelled "Are you alright ma'mmmmm ??????  I yelled back "Nooooooooo !!!!!! And she just shrugged her shoulders and went on stocking shelves. I had to find the allergy meds by myself.


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## Keesha (Jul 13, 2021)

Alligatorob said:


> How are you in our language is really a greeting more akin to hello than a real question.  And our standard answers like "fine and you" are not thought out, just a quick return greeting.  My grandfather always used to answer with "no better" or "no worse". I like to  use that sometimes now, gets interesting reactions, reminds people they really are asking a question.


I agree. It’s just a friendly way of saying hello that seems rather harmless but to each their own.


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## Nathan (Jul 13, 2021)

hollydolly said:


> What irritates me more is the robotic question when I get to the checkout till.. for example in a clothing store..or shoe shop.. and they say.. ''did you find everything you needed today''.. ?


Just part of their script that is required of them to say.       Not all young store clerks are drones, I've had numerous store staff actually take me to the isle of the item I inquired about...perhaps scripted as well, but a nice touch.


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## Jules (Jul 13, 2021)

Home Depot had a greeter at the door and any staff not assisting someone were trained to greet you.  It got tedious.  I know they had to do it because store policy made them.  It’s finally quit so I expect that customers finally talked to management. 

If a person with a badge is just walking around the store greeting you, it’s in preparation for selling their credit card.

Most staff are just following the rules.


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## hollydolly (Jul 13, 2021)

Nathan said:


> Just part of their script that is required of them to say.       Not all young store clerks are drones, I've had numerous store staff actually take me to the isle of the item I inquired about...perhaps scripted as well, but a nice touch.


that is nice.. hardly ever happens here....


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## hollydolly (Jul 13, 2021)

Jules said:


> Home Depot had a greeter at the door and any staff not assisting someone were trained to greet you.  It got tedious.  I know they had to do it because store policy made them.  It’s finally quit so I expect that customers finally talked to management.
> 
> *If a person with a badge is just walking around the store greeting you, it’s in preparation for selling their credit card.*
> 
> Most staff are just following the rules.


that's one thing we don't get here, thank goodness...


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## hollydolly (Jul 13, 2021)

Tabby Ann said:


> At a Target store the cashier said "Did you find everything you were looking for?"  I said "No". He said your total is $49.98 and that was the end of the conversation. He never asked what I was looking for.


precisely.. and the same thing happens 90 % of the time here ! They've been trained to ask the question  but not trained to respond to the reply


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## Paco Dennis (Jul 13, 2021)

When people on the phone or when I am in some business and someone acts like that, I keep asking my question until they give me a suitable answer...if they don't I ask for their supervisor. If they are stupid or rude I leave and won't go back. I ignore the compulsory Hello smiley face routine, or sometimes I respond in kind.


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## Skyking (Jul 13, 2021)

Yes, folks we really are friendly here in the midwest and it's not all fake. Try coping...It's hard, I know.


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## Ken N Tx (Jul 14, 2021)




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## Tabby Ann (Jul 22, 2021)

This prying/lying ritual where store clerks ask customers an invasive question and customers respond with a lie, is not good public relations. It wasn’t always this way. Store clerks at one time were there to answer questions and provide customer service regarding store products. . Today however, once they ask how you are doing and you give them the lie they are looking for, they feel they’ve completed their customer service duty for the day and they want nothing else to do with you. Our English language provides better words for retail clerks to use if they approach a customer at all, such as "Hello, if I can be of service let me know". And if clerks wear identifying vests or large badges, there's no reason they should have to approach the customer at all.


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