# A "must read" but remember, whoever wrote it is not perfect, but if the shoe fits..



## Denise1952 (Mar 22, 2015)

..I enjoyed reading this article, wanted to share it with those who are open-minded, and teachable denise

http://www.marcandangel.com/2014/07/30/10-types-of-toxic-relationships-mentally-strong-people-avoid/


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## SeaBreeze (Mar 22, 2015)

Good advice, I'm very thankful to be in a good long-term relationship that is non-toxic...I see a lot of others that are not so lucky.


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## SifuPhil (Mar 22, 2015)

They've got some interesting articles on that blog - thanks. 

Of course, all of MY relationships are perfect, so I can't learn anything there, but still ...


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## Denise1952 (Mar 22, 2015)

It's interesting, there are people in this world I love dearly, but I see that "need" kind of thing, before the actual "want", or the need being the basis I mean.  I think picking toxic relationships is like when I was just feeling desperate, "oh, I just know a man will fix everything".  Not so easy to admit, but I felt that way to the extreme when I first entered menopause, geesh!  I picked someone that was totally wrong for me, and he even ended up stalking me.  Hey, I asked for it, well, not that exactly, but I was vulnerable because I looked for help in the wrong places.  I don't regret because I learned a lot about myself.

I think if you have a good marriage, you had a good handle on your mental and emotional.  One thing I know today, is don't look for someone because you feel a need.  You probably just "need" to go out for a hike, then a hot bath, and snuggle in with a good book, lol  I think I am liking this age deal, I am seeing I "have" learned some things afteralllayful:


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## SifuPhil (Mar 22, 2015)

I've found two paths to relationship contentment - abstention and Master/slave relationships.


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## Denise1952 (Mar 22, 2015)

SifuPhil said:


> They've got some interesting articles on that blog - thanks.
> 
> Of course, all of MY relationships are perfect, so I can't learn anything there, but still ...



You are welcome, sure liked reading it for myself, and I'm perfect, but it's finding a guy that perfect, LOL!!  Ok, so really, it's about two independent people, that want a relationship, but their life does not depend on it


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## SifuPhil (Mar 22, 2015)

I've encountered far too many "needy" people in my life - or worse, the opposite - the distant, cold-fish types. The only ones that I've ever met that seem to be balanced are already married, so that leaves THEM out.

I'll always have my cats ...


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## Denise1952 (Mar 22, 2015)

As a friend of mine always says "meh" she may show up yet  The right kind of gal


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## SifuPhil (Mar 22, 2015)

nwlady said:


> As a friend of mine always says "meh" she may show up yet  The right kind of gal



Yeah, maybe my standards are too high - I want them to look like Jennifer Love-Hewitt, have the brain of Madam Curie and the strength of Wonder Woman.

I usually get Phyllis Diller, Paris Hilton and Bat Girl, respectively.


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## Denise1952 (Mar 22, 2015)

Shoot, that's a could combo to look for  You didn't mention age, and if you disregard that, it includes a lot more results

Shoot, even what you usually get sound good if I was a guy.  So what the hell are you complainin about LOL!


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## SifuPhil (Mar 22, 2015)

nwlady said:


> Shoot, that's a could combo to look for  You didn't mention age, and if you disregard that, it includes a lot more results



As long as there's a pulse, and even that's optional sometimes ... :cower:



> Shoot, even what you usually get sound good if I was a guy.  So what the hell are you complainin about LOL!



Well, I'm shooting for empathy - some folks recently told me I have none. layful:


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## Denise1952 (Mar 22, 2015)

Hey, don't tell anyone but at this point, I'm not sure what empathy is.  I feel the more I return to my nieve roots the better off I am


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## SifuPhil (Mar 22, 2015)

nwlady said:


> Hey, don't tell anyone but at this point, I'm not sure what empathy is.  I feel the more I return to my nieve roots the better off I am



I think you might be right.

I've seriously been considering pulling the green and red suit and the shoes with the bells out of the closet again ...


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## Denise1952 (Mar 22, 2015)

You are Santa??  I've been talking to Santa??  OMG, ok, need to get hold of myself, I have some things I really want to discuss with you Santa, mostly, that winning lotto ticket I asked for, for the LAST 30 YEARS!!  I got some nice, hot coals goin on in my fireplace, come on over, let's talk:tapfoot:


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## SifuPhil (Mar 22, 2015)

Oh, my achin' ...

Okay, I can see how you got Santa from that. Unfortunately I was shooting for -


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## Denise1952 (Mar 22, 2015)

Ok, that's cool, a court-jester is who you were shooting for?  I got no beefs with those guys


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## DoItMyself (Mar 23, 2015)

Good article-a lot of people would do well to read and understand it before getting involved in a relationship.


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## Denise1952 (Mar 23, 2015)

I think I'll read it over and over til I memorize it, LOL!!  Just in case I meet someone


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## oakapple (Mar 24, 2015)

SifuPhil said:


> I've found two paths to relationship contentment - abstention and Master/slave relationships.


You mean all you need is love.......and a few minions.


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## oakapple (Mar 24, 2015)

The main thing I look for in a man, is the ability to bring my mug of tea and ginger biscuit whenever I need it.


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## SifuPhil (Mar 24, 2015)

oakapple said:


> You mean all you need is love.......and a few minions.



(with apologies to the Beatles' "All You Need Is Love")


There's nothing you can do that can't be done.
Nothing you can do to stop the stun.
Nothing you can say, but you can learn
How to pray for pain 
It's easy.

Nothing you can make that can't be made.
No one you can save that won't be a slave.
Nothing you can do, but you can learn
How to be blue in time 
It's easy.

All you need is love (and a few minions),
All you need is love, love. Love is all you need.
Love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love, love.
All you need is love, all you need is love,
All you need is love, love. And a few minions.


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## oakapple (Apr 1, 2015)

Love it! I can see it racing to the top of the charts anytime now.


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## oakapple (Apr 1, 2015)

SifuPhil said:


> Oh, my achin' ...
> 
> Okay, I can see how you got Santa from that. Unfortunately I was shooting for -
> 
> View attachment 16268


surely, you jest?


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## SifuPhil (Apr 1, 2015)

oakapple said:


> surely, you jest?



No, I do _not_ jest, and please don't call me Shirley.


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## oakapple (Apr 2, 2015)

Shirley, just get on with capering around and less cheek, otherwise you will be popped into the oubliette.


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## SifuPhil (Apr 2, 2015)

oakapple said:


> Shirley, just get on with capering around and less cheek, otherwise you will be popped into the oubliette.



Ooh - the _last_ time I was popped in the oubliette I had to spend 5 hours in the doctor's waiting room, and I haven't walked the same since!


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## oakapple (Apr 2, 2015)

SifuPhil said:


> Ooh - the _last_ time I was popped in the oubliette I had to spend 5 hours in the doctor's waiting room, and I haven't walked the same since!


Well, if you will insist on walking around in your motley, what do you expect?


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## SifuPhil (Apr 2, 2015)

oakapple said:


> Well, if you will insist on walking around in your motley, what do you expect?



Actually there's a whole group of us that walk around that way.

We call ourselves the motley crew.


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## oakapple (Apr 2, 2015)

SifuPhil said:


> Actually there's a whole group of us that walk around that way.
> 
> We call ourselves the motley crew.
> 
> View attachment 16604


great name for a band, as there are a group of you,  and may I say how very fetching you look, you should dress like that daily!


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## oakapple (Apr 2, 2015)

Though perhaps not for the supermarket Phil.nthego:


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## SifuPhil (Apr 2, 2015)

oakapple said:


> Though perhaps not for the supermarket Phil.nthego:



I agree 100%. I save my LED-lit Speedos for there ...


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