# Noticing that people treat me different now that I am older.



## RedSky4u (Aug 24, 2020)

I noticed recently that when I go to the store or doctors office, that people treat me as a senior. I know that I am a senior, but I don't like being treated as one. Maybe it is the way I dress (very casual). Maybe it is the fact that I stopped wearing makeup recently.
What has your experience been?


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## dawnkitty (Aug 24, 2020)

I dont know how old you are but I am 62 and i havent noticed anything like that yet.. what do you mean they treat you "as a senior".. do they talk louder or are they nicer or?


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## fmdog44 (Aug 24, 2020)

No change people are polite or they are not.


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## RadishRose (Aug 24, 2020)

I haven't noticed being treated negatively or any different, really. Not sure what you mean, Redsky.


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## bingo (Aug 24, 2020)

they must think i ain't old yet...still don't  get no respect...


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## Aneeda72 (Aug 24, 2020)

They treat me differently because of my age.  I get called “dear” a lot .  People think they have to guide me with a “this way dear and their hand in the small of my back.”  . And it’s ok hon.  Or let me lead you to the bathroom, or wait here I’ll get it for you, or a million other demeaning things which indicate I am too old to chew gum and walk.

Hmm, the chew and walk thing-they might be right about that


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## Pepper (Aug 24, 2020)

@Aneeda72 
Don't you use a walker?  Wouldn't that be the reason?


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## Gaer (Aug 24, 2020)

Oh yes,  if I ask for a senior discount, (which I have stopped doing), They respond, "Oh, You look too young to get a senior discount." (giggle)  Hate that!  I might be old but I'm not STUPID!


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## Aneeda72 (Aug 24, 2020)

Pepper said:


> @Aneeda72
> Don't you use a walker?  Wouldn't that be the reason?


Just because you use a walker that doesn’t mean you can not (forgot the not edited)hear .  Yet, people always talk loudly to me.


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## Pepper (Aug 24, 2020)

No, Aneeda, I meant they treat you as a disabled person, not necessarily as an old disabled person, although using this equipment causes people to act differently toward you.


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## gennie (Aug 24, 2020)

Get as old as me and you become invisible.  The only thing my daughter does about my medical care is drive me to appointments and pick up my meds but at a visit - when doctors talk about my care - they generally look at her instead of me.

I am 87 but my brain still works.


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## MarciKS (Aug 24, 2020)

I'm finding that I get talked around. Like I'll be saying something and they decide it's just the blathering's of an old lady and start having conversations around mine.


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## Gaer (Aug 24, 2020)

gennie said:


> Get as old as me and you become invisible.  The only thing my daughter does about my medical care is drive me to appointments and pick up my meds but at a visit - when doctors talk about my care - they generally look at her instead of me.
> 
> I am 87 but my brain still works.


OH!  That would be SO IRRITATING!  I'd say something to the Doctor.  "Hey, I'm over here!"


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## Keesha (Aug 24, 2020)

RedSky4u said:


> I noticed recently that when I go to the store or doctors office, that people treat me as a senior. I know that I am a senior, but I don't like being treated as one. Maybe it is the way I dress (very casual). Maybe it is the fact that I stopped wearing makeup recently.
> What has your experience been?


You are in a depression. I can understand the dressing  casual with no make up part. If you usually wear make up, people may be looking at you because you look different. Perhaps you look more pale and thinner than normal etc.

By the way, I’m sorry you are having so many side effects from the drugs you have been prescribed. It can be really tough


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## Gaer (Aug 24, 2020)

MarciKS said:


> I'm finding that I get talked around. Like I'll be saying something and they decide it's just the blathering's of an old lady and start having conversations around mine.


The more I read in this thread, the madder I get!


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## gennie (Aug 24, 2020)

Gaer said:


> OH!  That would be SO IRRITATING!  I'd say something to the Doctor.  "Hey, I'm over here!"


Have done, several times with several different doctors.  My daughter has even told them to talk to me.


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## Aunt Bea (Aug 24, 2020)

Most people don't even notice me and most of the time I'm ok with that.


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## DaveA (Aug 24, 2020)

gennie said:


> Get as old as me and you become invisible.  The only thing my daughter does about my medical care is drive me to appointments and pick up my meds but at a visit - when doctors talk about my care - they generally look at her instead of me.
> 
> I am 87 but my brain still works.


We have the same situation. Our daughter takes my wife to her doctor appointments and she is the "go to" person for the doc to call.  My wife requested that the doctor speak with and to her as neither I (at 86) or my wife (at 84) can remember half of what he has said by the time we reach home.

She's far more computer savvy than either of us and interacts far better with the medical personnel.  Our brains still (seem to) work but the memory portions are slipping away.


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## MarciKS (Aug 24, 2020)

They did that when I took my mom in to the dr. Maybe they think the kids know better and the older folks are too feeble to know what's going on. That's an awful assumption to make. My grandpa had to have someone with him because he had trouble remembering what the doc said so mom knew what to do for him.


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## Aneeda72 (Aug 24, 2020)

Pepper said:


> No, Aneeda, I meant they treat you as a disabled person, not necessarily as an old disabled person, although using this equipment causes people to act differently toward you.


Oh


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## MarciKS (Aug 24, 2020)

Aunt Bea said:


> Most people don't even notice me and most of the time I'm ok with that.


I feel like as we age we get dismissed more and more. I notice you. LOL


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## Aneeda72 (Aug 24, 2020)

MarciKS said:


> I'm finding that I get talked around. Like I'll be saying something and they decide it's just the blathering's of an old lady and start having conversations around mine.


Yes, I’ve had this problem as well.


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## Aunt Bea (Aug 24, 2020)

gennie said:


> Get as old as me and you become invisible.  The only thing my daughter does about my medical care is drive me to appointments and pick up my meds but at a visit - when doctors talk about my care - they generally look at her instead of me.
> 
> I am 87 but my brain still works.


That used to happen when I took my mother to her medical appointments.

One day she told a young doctor that if he expected to get paid he had better start talking to her.


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## peppermint (Aug 24, 2020)

Never had a problem...I'm 75 years old....I have 2 Doctors and both are lovely people....They even take time to talk to me....
If ever they are mean or condescending....I would never go back!!!!


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## GeorgiaXplant (Aug 24, 2020)

I get that occasionally, and sometimes I feel invisible. Mostly what I get, though, is "I love your blue hair!" or asked for ID to make sure I qualify for the senior discount or, when my DD is with me, referred to as her sister. Meh. I don't wear makeup and never have. I don't own a dress. I wear Levi's and t-shirts in the summer and Levi's and sweatshirts in the winter. I'm not exactly what anybody would call fashion forward.

Sounds to me like you're way to conscious of your age and anticipate being "discriminated" against. And depressed. No need to holler before you're hurt.


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## Aneeda72 (Aug 24, 2020)

@GeorgiaXplant -what?  Who are you “talking to”?  I’m confused-must be my age .  But it can’t be me you are speaking to cause I am not depressed.  I did not think I was depressed and I saw my doctor a couple days ago and she said “you look, better than I thought you would”.  

Well, alrighty then.  . 

Then she ordered blood tests, then she gave me the results.  Apparently I look better than I am.  . Anyway, I have no ideal what you last paragraph means.  Who do you think is depressed and why?


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## GeorgiaXplant (Aug 24, 2020)

Aneeda72 said:


> @GeorgiaXplant -what?  Who are you “talking to”?  I’m confused-must be my age .  But it can’t be me you are speaking to cause I am not depressed.  I did not think I was depressed and I saw my doctor a couple days ago and she said “you look, better than I thought you would”.
> 
> Well, alrighty then.  .
> 
> Then she ordered blood tests, then she gave me the results.  Apparently I look better than I am.  . Anyway, I have no ideal what you last paragraph means.  Who do you think is depressed and why?


No no! Not you, the OP. She also sounds defensive, like "I_ dare _you to treat me like I imagine old people get treated."


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## PopsnTuff (Aug 24, 2020)

Happens to me all the time for the last couple of years....I'm much slower now, can't hear as good and lose most of my voice during the day so if they're hearing and seeing an old timer here, they got it right.....but the respect factor is very low from everyone younger than me


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## Aneeda72 (Aug 24, 2020)

GeorgiaXplant said:


> No no! Not you, the OP. She also sounds defensive, like "I_ dare _you to treat me like I imagine old people get treated."


Oh, ok, thanks


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## GeorgiaXplant (Aug 24, 2020)

So far at least I haven't noticed a lack of respect. If I'm out and about somewhere and having a problem lifting something or finding something, I'm not too proud to ask for help. People (again, so far!) have been willing to lend a hand. If I see somebody else having a hard time wrestling merchandise or not able to reach it or whatever, I offer to help if I can and hope Karma will remember when it's my turn...


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## MarciKS (Aug 24, 2020)

GeorgiaXplant said:


> So far at least I haven't noticed a lack of respect. If I'm out and about somewhere and having a problem lifting something or finding something, I'm not too proud to ask for help. People (again, so far!) have been willing to lend a hand. If I see somebody else having a hard time wrestling merchandise or not able to reach it or whatever, I offer to help if I can and hope Karma will remember when it's my turn...


Me too


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## Warrigal (Aug 24, 2020)

I am old. At 77 and 3/4 years old, the face in the mirror is definitely not that of someone young but my eyes (newly renovated) show that the brain is still active and energetic. I appreciate helpful gestures such as asking if I can manage the grocery bags (I can, thanks to two shoulder replacements) and people giving up their seat on the train so that I don't have to tackle the stairs.

When I was in my salad days I would give up my seat for older people, pregnant women and the disabled as a matter of courtesy but back then I did not understand the effect of chronic pain. I do now, having endured it for several years before my various joint replacements and I am grateful for the considerate people who offer courtesy to me now.

As for the doctors, I still attend by myself so there is no doubt about my mental acuity. Years ago I would take my MIL to her specialist appointments and I well remember a visit to a surgeon to discuss treatment options for a cancer in her bowel. I listened to all of the options and at the end of the consultation he turned to MIL and asked her what she was thinking. "Well doctor", she said, "you must always look after your eyes". Doctors must get quite a few patients like that so I don't blame them if they talk to the person they think is most likely to understand what they say.

I also escorted my maiden aunt to her doctor visits. She was frail and needed my help but she was also rather deaf and in denial - no hearing aids. I was her ears and I remember one visit where the doctor was speaking to her normally and I tipped him off to the problem by letting him know that she was " a bit Mutt and Jeff". He spoke up but even so, she needed me to tell her later what he had said.  Again, they must have quite a few patients like Auntie.

When the doctors start talking over my head it will be to my daughter who is a nurse. When that day comes, I don't think I will mind too much.


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## Butterfly (Aug 25, 2020)

gennie said:


> Have done, several times with several different doctors.  My daughter has even told them to talk to me.



I've done the same thing.  Just because I'm no spring chicken doesn't mean I'm senile.  Makes me furious.


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## Aneeda72 (Aug 25, 2020)

I really hate the words some people use to the elderly.  It’s ok dear.  I am not their dear, or honey or sweetie, or sweetheart.


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## hollydolly (Aug 25, 2020)

Aneeda72 said:


> I really hate the words some people use to the elderly.  It’s ok dear.  I am not their dear, or honey or sweetie, or sweetheart.


oddly I don't mind being given those names as long as the person is older than me... it really rankles when I get a teenager saying it...


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## katlupe (Aug 25, 2020)

No, nobody treats me any different due to my age. People are helpful to me when I am out due to me using a walker or a mobility chair. What annoys me is that my boyfriend's daughter treats him and me like she knows how to do everything and we don't know a thing. She tries to take over. It is fine doing it for her father but not me.


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## katlupe (Aug 25, 2020)

Aneeda72 said:


> I really hate the words some people use to the elderly.  It’s ok dear.  I am not their dear, or honey or sweetie, or sweetheart.


When I worked as a CNA in nursing homes, I made sure not to talk down to my residents. Some of my coworkers talked to them like they were children. It was not respectful of their age or what they had done in their lives.


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## hollydolly (Aug 25, 2020)

katlupe said:


> No, nobody treats me any different due to my age. People are helpful to me when I am out due to me using a walker or a mobility chair. What annoys me is that my boyfriend's daughter treats him and me like she knows how to do everything and we don't know a thing. She tries to take over. It is fine doing it for her father but not me.


You need to tell her , thank you for your help I appreciate it , and the time may come when I'll be grateful for it , but I'd rather do it for myself, use it or lose it....


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## Aneeda72 (Aug 25, 2020)

hollydolly said:


> oddly I don't mind being given those names as long as the person is older than me... it really rankles when I get a teenager saying it...


Well, that’s it, a twenty year old nursing assistant acting like an idiot.  I once had one of them holding my hand and stroking my skin saying repeatedly how soft it was.  . She had gloves on, she could not feel my skin.  (I was having a minor procedure.)

Thank heaven there was another nurses aide in the room.  I was getting nervous for my virginity.


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## Mr. Ed (Aug 25, 2020)




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## Ruthanne (Aug 25, 2020)

When I came out of the grocery store there was a man behind me that told me I was walking kind of slow and asked me if I wanted help with my bags.  I was a bit irritated by it because slow is my normal pace at my age in the state of my health.


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## hollydolly (Aug 25, 2020)

Ruthanne said:


> When I came out of the grocery store there was a man behind me that told me I was walking kind of slow and asked me if I wanted help with my bags.  I was a bit irritated by it because slow is my normal pace at my age in the state of my health.


what the heck had it got to do with him, _how_ slow you were walking ?...how rude


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## Ruthanne (Aug 25, 2020)

hollydolly said:


> what the heck had it got to do with him, _how_ slow you were walking ?...how rude


Exactly what I thought too.


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## Pepper (Aug 25, 2020)

Aneeda72 said:


> I really hate the words some people use to the elderly.  It’s ok dear.  I am not their dear, or honey or sweetie, or sweetheart.


And you're not their Mama, either!


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## LindaB (Aug 25, 2020)

DaveA said:


> We have the same situation. Our daughter takes my wife to her doctor appointments and she is the "go to" person for the doc to call.  My wife requested that the doctor speak with and to her as neither I (at 86) or my wife (at 84) can remember half of what he has said by the time we reach home.
> 
> She's far more computer savvy than either of us and interacts far better with the medical personnel.  Our brains still (seem to) work but the memory portions are slipping away.


I think it's  always good no matter what your age, to have another person with you. Sometimes they will ask questions that you may not have thought to ask and you can compare notes afterwards on the remembered conversation and/or instructions.


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## Damaged Goods (Aug 25, 2020)

Warrigal said:


> I am old. At 77 and 3/4 years old, the face in the mirror is definitely not that of someone young but my eyes (newly renovated) show that the brain is still active and energetic. I appreciate helpful gestures such as asking if I can manage the grocery bags (I can, thanks to two shoulder replacements) and people giving up their seat on the train so that I don't have to tackle the stairs.



If I'm being too personal, please let me know.

How long was the rehab time after shoulder replacements before you could resume normal activities?  I assume that you didn't have both procedures done at the same time?  Did you require a support system such as family members to help you through rehab?  Thanks.


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## Mr. Ed (Aug 25, 2020)

I've paid my dues and I'm not easily intimidated unlike former years having more to lose


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## Liberty (Aug 25, 2020)

My mom was a hoot. She didn't want any "pat your knee and talk baby talk to you docs."  She picked the "tell it like it is" ones.  She was legally blind, but didn't show it, and if someone talked loud to her she'd say, "hey, I may be blind, but I can HEAR just fine, so dial it down, "ya hear"? If you do that once, trust me, they won't make the same mistake again and they'll pay attention to you...lol.

She also used to reply to the inane question "are you over 21" for a medical or legal matter with the reply "actually I'm only 18, but I've had a very hard life."  She never seemed old, and was sharp as a tack mentally.


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## StarSong (Aug 25, 2020)

As the years have spun by, adults of other ages have treated me differently.
In my youth, they bossed me assumed I could do little for myself.
In my mid-late teens, they feared the power of the huge Baby Boom generation, and assumed I was looking for trouble.
In my 20s-40s they hit on me, envied my youth, and reminisced about their own.
In my 50s they respected me.
In my 60s I've noticed that I'm often invisible.

I've always used Honey or Sweetie for kind strangers as well as people I love, and do so with absolute sincerety. "Thank you for opening that door for me, Honey!" I've never had anyone call me out on it, nor does it insult me to be called by it when it's used as a term of endearment.

I'm not talking about the times when men use it dismissively or to assert their power over women. "Get everyone a round of coffee, would you, Honey?" when I was the only female, but on the same managerial level as everyone else in the meeting. In those cases I learned to smile sweetly and say, "Sure will, Sweetie, if you'll come along and lend me a hand."

When my mom and FIL were unable to go to manage doctor & dental appointments on their own, DH and/or I would accompany them. They were relieved to have another set of ears and eyes to interpret the advice being given. If I live long enough, my own body will undoubtedly deteriorate to the point where I will also be grateful to have one of my children or children-in-law perform that loving service for me.



GeorgiaXplant said:


> No need to holler before you're hurt.


I never heard this expression before, but it's sure a good one!


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## StarSong (Aug 25, 2020)

Liberty said:


> My mom was a hoot. She didn't want any "pat your knee and talk baby talk to you docs."  She picked the "tell it like it is" ones.  She was legally blind, but didn't show it, and if someone talked loud to her she'd say, "hey, I may be blind, but I can HEAR just fine, so dial it down, "ya hear"? If you do that once, trust me, they won't make the same mistake again and they'll pay attention to you...lol.
> 
> She also used to reply to the inane question "are you over 21" for a medical or legal matter with the reply "actually I'm only 18, but I've had a very hard life."  She never seemed old, and was sharp as a tack mentally.


Now that you mention it, I do remember calling out some nurse's aides who infantilized my mother with questions like whether she'd made poop that day.  I'd pointedly tell them she knew what a bowel movement was.  Even at her most confused, she understood the proper words for bodily functions.


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## Warrigal (Aug 25, 2020)

Damaged Goods said:


> If I'm being too personal, please let me know.
> 
> How long was the rehab time after shoulder replacements before you could resume normal activities?  I assume that you didn't have both procedures done at the same time?  Did you require a support system such as family members to help you through rehab?  Thanks.


I was a bit concerned about the first operation. I elected to have the left one done first so that I could have my dominant hand functional while the other shoulder healed. I was particularly worried about how I would manage pulling up my knickers with just one hand. I needed have worried. The arm was kept in a sling, not because it was non functional, but to protect the tissues that needed to heal from damage due to weight bearing. I could take my arm out of the sling to deal with the knickers and other delicate tasks. 

There was no need for any rehab and the exercises were minimal for the first 6 weeks (?). After that they were designed to improve range of movements but I was still not supposed to carry anything heavy until three months after the op. Driving was out until three months too. Then I had the right shoulder done and it was just as easy although not driving was a bit of a pain.

The cut was made from the front and the collar bone has to be dislocated to fix the joint. Sounds horrible but was not painful after the op at all.


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## StarSong (Aug 25, 2020)

As long as we're straying off topic, @Warrigal, would you please explain your signature line?
"Henceforth all Australians are required to pronounce USA as ‘oosah’ until the emoo situation improves." I understand the oosah part but no idea about the emoo reference.


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## JaniceM (Aug 25, 2020)

Aneeda72 said:


> I really hate the words some people use to the elderly.  It’s ok dear.  I am not their dear, or honey or sweetie, or sweetheart.


There aren't many things that irk the * out of me, but that's one of them.  
I don't know about your location, and not sure where you're located, but it's not entirely an elderly thing-  when I first started encountering it around 2013, web search brought up a site/forum where individuals of all ages had been complaining about it since 2010, and yesterday another site/forum went back to 2008.  It's disrespectful, condescending, and I hate it.


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## GeorgiaXplant (Aug 25, 2020)

Oh, for heaven's sake. With all the turmoil, hate, hunger, homelessness, poverty, injustice and whatever all else in the world, this is what's on folks' minds?

_Call me anything, just don't call me late for supper._

Seems like anymore everybody's gotta have something to be offended about. *Is that lady giving me the side eye? *I didn't like the tone of voice that boy used. *I don't care what she meant, I care about the way I heard it.

Let's all wear dark glasses so people can't judge our response by our eyes. Let's all maintain radio silence in fear of being misunderstood, especially being "misunderstood" on purpose so we can be offended yet again.

Chill, people. Chill. Life is too short to spend it waiting for someone to knock the chip off your shoulder.


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## Aneeda72 (Aug 25, 2020)

GeorgiaXplant said:


> Oh, for heaven's sake. With all the turmoil, hate, hunger, homelessness, poverty, injustice and whatever all else in the world, this is what's on folks' minds?
> 
> _Call me anything, just don't call me late for supper._
> 
> ...


“Call me anything, just don’t call me late for supper”.  Hmm, my husband’s motto and he is 340 pounds-give or take 5 pounds.  And, so you know, I call him a variety of names at the appropriate time-so there is no fear that he will misunderstand me.  

It is impossible to offend my husband.  I’ve tried.  Others have tried.  Imagine a world filled with people like him, people who care only for themself.  People who cannot be guided by the herd.  People who are chill, very very chill.  I can assure you, you won’t like such a world of cold blooded people.

On a brighter note, yes, this is what is on our minds are on; because we are sick and tired of the shootings, the looting, the virus, the go to school or don’t, the eat out or don‘t, the no we are out of that item, the constant worry, the economy, the politics, more politics, no money, no place to go, and the endless never ending crap that hits us in the face every dang day.

I am NOT a chill person.  I’m old, sick, disabled, in a great deal of pain, and slightly angry most of the time.  I have earned the chips on my shoulders.  Anyone who wants can try and knock them off.  When they get out of the hospital, they can try again.  .  I have a somewhat poor attitude.

I am not a doormat.  But, hey, have a nice day.


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## JaniceM (Aug 25, 2020)

And in addition:  
-  Those of us who show respect to others are reasonable to expect it in return.
-  When a person goes into a store, restaurant, etc. and makes a purchase, we are contributing to paying those employees' salaries.


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## DaveA (Aug 25, 2020)

I must be living in some Utopia as I rarely run across any of these people that abuse, ignore, and supposedly despise we older folks. If anything, as I've aged I have more offers of assistance, smiles, and what appears to be respect, from younger folks.
And my "old" is now mid 80's, and 20 years ago I didn't get as many offers of help but still got friendly smiles and pleasantries. 

 Is it possibly a case of the "eye of the beholder" that sees all of these slights and insults?  I have no idea but just find that my day to day interactions with folks, young and old, seems to be a lot more pleasant than some.


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## Nathan (Aug 25, 2020)

RedSky4u said:


> I noticed recently that when I go to the store or doctors office, that people treat me as a senior. I know that I am a senior, but I don't like being treated as one.


The grocery store employees are just doing their job, so I get a secret chuckle out of their offers to help.   My former primary care doctor would talk as if my concerns weren't that important, as(in his view) I was ready to go "feet first" at any minute.  
My dentist made a statement several years ago- "now that you're retired you won't need dental insurance".   ???   I should have pressed him to explain, as I still want to have teeth!


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## Aneeda72 (Aug 25, 2020)

DaveA said:


> I must be living in some Utopia as I rarely run across any of these people that abuse, ignore, and supposedly despise we older folks. If anything, as I've aged I have more offers of assistance, smiles, and what appears to be respect, from younger folks.
> And my "old" is now mid 80's, and 20 years ago I didn't get as many offers of help but still got friendly smiles and pleasantries.
> 
> Is it possibly a case of the "eye of the beholder" that sees all of these slights and insults?  I have no idea but just find that my day to day interactions with folks, young and old, seems to be a lot more pleasant than some.


Well, when I am at Costco, and headed for the exit, I watch all the people race by me, to get to the door first instead of patietly waiting for me, who is first in line, to get there.  True, I usually have two speeds, slow and slower.  Still it’s rude.

And I have this issue everywhere, as people rush to get to the checkout, movie line, etc.  The “eye of the beholder” is me eyeing everyone’s butts as they rush by,


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## Treacle (Aug 25, 2020)

When I was much much younger (teen years) cars would stop at the zebra crossing to let me cross. Even now they still stop at the zebra crossing and let me cross. But here's the thing I am not that naive  and I know the difference in their decision to stop.  Ooh young woman...... awh elderly woman. Who cares I get across the road in safety. (Especially with the number of crazy drivers on the road). Just saying  ☺


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## Gaer (Aug 25, 2020)

GeorgiaXplant said:


> Oh, for heaven's sake. With all the turmoil, hate, hunger, homelessness, poverty, injustice and whatever all else in the world, this is what's on folks' minds?
> 
> _Call me anything, just don't call me late for supper._
> 
> ...



You know what?  This is AWESOME!!!!  Should we waste our days waiting for better ones?   Georgia, You put the petty problems in perspective!


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## GeorgiaXplant (Aug 25, 2020)

Treacle said:


> When I was much much younger (teen years) cars would stop at the zebra crossing to let me cross. Even now they still stop at the zebra crossing and let me cross. But here's the thing I am not that naive  and I know the difference in their decision to stop.  Ooh young woman...... awh elderly woman. Who cares I get across the road in safety. (Especially with the number of crazy drivers on the road). Just saying  ☺


Isn't there a law that requires drivers to stop for pedestrians in a crosswalk? Does it specify ages of the pedestrians?


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## GeorgiaXplant (Aug 25, 2020)

Aneeda72 said:


> Well, when I am at Costco, and headed for the exit, I watch all the people race by me, to get to the door first instead of patietly waiting for me, who is first in line, to get there.  True, I usually have two speeds, slow and slower.  Still it’s rude.
> 
> And I have this issue everywhere, as people rush to get to the checkout, movie line, etc.  The “eye of the beholder” is me eyeing everyone’s butts as they rush by,


It makes a difference who gets where first? If somebody else is in a hurry, fine by me. I'm retired. Nowhere to go and all the time in the world to get there. I hardly expect that if I'm moving slowly that everybody else line up behind me and move at least as slowly as I do out of "respect" for my advanced age? What? Makes more sense to me to step aside and make room for somebody who's in a hurry. Maybe it's somebody hurrying to pick up their kids from school, or somebody who needs to make a plane, or...somebody who was waiting to check out and got a call that a loved one was in an accident. 

I'm not so important that everybody else should make way for my pokey self.

Folks! Listen up! A hundred years from now, having your feelings hurt today won't make an iota of difference in the overall scheme of things.


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## Rosemarie (Aug 25, 2020)

I get smiled at by young men, which is rather nice.


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## Treacle (Aug 25, 2020)

Yes  there is a law @GeorgiaXplant  about zebra crossings but If I understand it correctly drivers are not obliged to stop if the person is waiting to cross but must stop if one has a foot on the crossing- it doesn't specify age but I was just trying to keep it light- hearted (except about  the  crazy drivers).  There are so many awful things going on in this world. I try not to worry if people treat me differently now I am older. They will reach a senior age one day!!! Thanks for the question/s.  ☺


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## Treacle (Aug 25, 2020)

Rosemarie said:


> I get smiled at by young men, which is rather nice.


@Rosemarie  - You do? Where do you live pray tell?  that sentence sounded a bit Shakespearean.


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## Aneeda72 (Aug 25, 2020)

GeorgiaXplant said:


> It makes a difference who gets where first? If somebody else is in a hurry, fine by me. I'm retired. Nowhere to go and all the time in the world to get there. I hardly expect that if I'm moving slowly that everybody else line up behind me and move at least as slowly as I do out of "respect" for my advanced age? What? Makes more sense to me to step aside and make room for somebody who's in a hurry. Maybe it's somebody hurrying to pick up their kids from school, or somebody who needs to make a plane, or...somebody who was waiting to check out and got a call that a loved one was in an accident.
> 
> I'm not so important that everybody else should make way for my pokey self.
> 
> Folks! Listen up! A hundred years from now, having your feelings hurt today won't make an iota of difference in the overall scheme of things.


My feelings are not hurt.  I don’t why you think that’s an issue.  In every area that you live in there is an acceptable way to act, and an unacceptable way to act.  We are one of the fastest growing states in the union population wise.  Lots of the new people lack basic manners apparently.

If you are waiting in line, you do not jump the line.  With social distancing, long lines, and people who have a sense of entitlement, manners are forgotten.  Sometimes if someone is pratcially running to bypass me, I will make the comment “run, Forrest, run.”  

Do I expect people to wait in certain situations, yes.  It is expected in my area,  perhaps in your area rudeness is more acceptable.  Different strokes for different folks, but I have enough self worth to speak up when people are being rude.


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## Damaged Goods (Aug 25, 2020)

Warrigal said:


> I was a bit concerned about the first operation. I elected to have the left one done first so that I could have my dominant hand functional while the other shoulder healed. I was particularly worried about how I would manage pulling up my knickers with just one hand. I needed have worried. The arm was kept in a sling, not because it was non functional, but to protect the tissues that needed to heal from damage due to weight bearing. I could take my arm out of the sling to deal with the knickers and other delicate tasks.
> 
> There was no need for any rehab and the exercises were minimal for the first 6 weeks (?). After that they were designed to improve range of movements but I was still not supposed to carry anything heavy until three months after the op. Driving was out until three months too. Then I had the right shoulder done and it was just as easy although not driving was a bit of a pain.
> 
> The cut was made from the front and the collar bone has to be dislocated to fix the joint. Sounds horrible but was not painful after the op at all.



Thank You.


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## Damaged Goods (Aug 25, 2020)

Flipping the script, I wish that Rite-Aid liquors would treat me like the geezer that I am, but they card everyone -- no exceptions. 

 I'm 76 Rite Aid, so use a little common sense.


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## Aneeda72 (Aug 25, 2020)

Damaged Goods said:


> Flipping the script, I wish that Rite-Aid liquors would treat me like the geezer that I am, but they card everyone -- no exceptions.
> 
> I'm 76 Rite Aid, so use a little common sense.


It’s not Rite Aid, it’s the state.  At least in our state, its the state.  The fines for not carding are huge, your business can be closed.  I dislike when a wal mart employee asks if I am old enough to watch certain movies.  But, then again, it’s there job to do so.


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## Aneeda72 (Aug 25, 2020)

GeorgiaXplant said:


> Isn't there a law that requires drivers to stop for pedestrians in a crosswalk? Does it specify ages of the pedestrians?


Yes there is a law, but in my state if you are crossing illegally and you get hit, too bad for you.

One problem is you press the button to cross a 4 lane road with a right turn lane and a left turn lane.  You have 22 seconds to get across before the walk light changes.    Yup, I have never made it.

People just have to wait for my sorry slow self to get to the finish line-curb.


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## Damaged Goods (Aug 25, 2020)

Aneeda72 said:


> It’s not Rite Aid, it’s the state.  At least in our state, its the state.  The fines for not carding are huge, your business can be closed.  I dislike when a wal mart employee asks if I am old enough to watch certain movies.  But, then again, it’s there job to do so.



In my State, the penalties for selling booze to people under 21 are huge too, but there's no requirement to card everyone.  No other liquor store automatically cards everyone.


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## JaniceM (Aug 26, 2020)

Aneeda72 said:


> It’s not Rite Aid, it’s the state.  At least in our state, its the state.  The fines for not carding are huge, your business can be closed.  I dislike when a wal mart employee asks if I am old enough to watch certain movies.  But, then again, it’s there job to do so.


There's no state law here for 'carding' customers, but during the last few years I've been unable to buy tobacco products and vaping products at the local convenience store because they started that policy, and my ID expired long ago.  I don't drink alcohol, so that's not an issue for me.


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## Warrigal (Aug 28, 2020)

StarSong said:


> As long as we're straying off topic, @Warrigal, would you please explain your signature line?
> "Henceforth all Australians are required to pronounce USA as ‘oosah’ until the emoo situation improves." I understand the oosah part but no idea about the emoo reference.


We have a large flightless bird down here called the emu. We pronounce it eem-you but Americans invariably pronounce it ee-moo, instantly identifying themselves as tourists. My signature is a quote from a tongue in cheek statement I read recently. Not to be taken seriously.


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## Rose57 (Aug 28, 2020)

I enjoyed reading and related the Many different personal Insights and experiences.


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## StarSong (Aug 29, 2020)

Warrigal said:


> We have a large flightless bird down here called the emu. We pronounce it eem-you but Americans invariably pronounce it ee-moo, instantly identifying themselves as tourists. My signature is a quote from a tongue in cheek statement I read recently. Not to be taken seriously.


Ah...  Thank you for the clarification.  Yes, I do pronounce it ee-moo and didn't realize it was incorrect.  The conundrum: if I started saying eem-you, most Americans would conclude I was a moron who'd never learned how to properly pronounce a not-uncommon three letter word.


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