# An Old Fashioned Passing



## 1955 (Feb 11, 2022)

My sister & her husband were both born again Christians who eventually settled down on a 40 acre farm in rural MO. They had 10 children, 2 boys & eight girls, and were very happy they had finally achieved their goals of being mostly self sufficient leading a simpler form of existence.  All the kids were home schooled and very responsible at doing their school work and chores.  Just a delight to be around.

After a few short years disaster struck & my sister had developed breast cancer.  Everybody pulled together supporting her throughout the treatment process & their prayers were answered.  She had pulled through the process. As things returned to normal disaster struck again with onset of leukemia – a known side effect of the breast cancer chemo drugs.  I thought how could I loose 2 sisters to leukemia.  My other sister had passed decades earlier from it with no known cause.

Well as time passed she decided to let nature run it’s course rather than subject herself to another treatment process.  So she remained at home continued on as best she could until finally hospice was called in.  As the end grew near we all gathered to be with her for the passing.  It was exactly what she wanted. We all made our peace as she listened to her favorite music.  She passed that night and the funeral was to be held in the morning.

In MO you can be buried on your own property as long as do the proper paper work, meet some requirements and have enough space.  This is what she wanted. So in the morning one neighbor came by with a backhoe and another had prepared simple pine box coffin. We all tucked her in & again made our peace.  Of course nobody could quit crying but I did have enough sense to consider just how we were going to lower her into the grave and told my nephews to nail those ropes to bottom of the coffin.

So eight of us got her out there and lowered into her final resting place without any hiccup's.  This is harder than you think when everybody is still crying.  We all threw flowers on top of the box and then as we buried her their pastor made his speech as we mourned her passing.  We had a bonfire that night.

My memories from that experience remain as vivid as ever and the personal experience of having gone through the process with her children & husband helps to validate her life and passing more deeply than other funerals I have attended.

Thankfully I still have two sisters left & lots of nephews, nieces, Grand and Great Grands too.


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## AnnieA (Feb 11, 2022)

Sometimes the old, simple ways are best.  I'm sorry for your loss but am thankful your sister had loved ones with her as she died and that she's at peace now.


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## palides2021 (Feb 11, 2022)

Sorry for your loss! You wrote a beautiful memorial for your sister. May her memory be eternal!


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## katlupe (Feb 13, 2022)

Very sorry about your sister. It sounds like your sister had the right idea of creating the kind of life she wanted. I liked that simple life concept myself, but never had a willing partner to do so.


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## RFW (Feb 13, 2022)

As someone who is not good at this kind of thing, I'd like to say sorry for your loss.


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## Packerjohn (Feb 13, 2022)

That is some story.  Thanks for writing.  I have spent years watching old cowboy/western films to know that in the old days, people were buried out in the lonesome prairies with a simple cross to mark the grave.  Fast forward 150 years to modern times and Hollywood has us believe that we need a big black hearst followed by 2 or 3 black cars to a fancy graveyard with dozens of people standing around dressed in black.  Hollywood never mentions the $25,000 bill for the whole sad affair.  To my way of thinking it would have been better to give this $25,000 to the person that died so he/she could have gone on a wonderful trip or did whatever he/she wanted with the money while they were still alive.  Your sister was very wise in deciding how to die.  I wish more people had that kind of brain power.


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