# Captain Kirk Riddle



## debodun (Jan 26, 2021)

What did they call Captain Kirk when he got a case of Montezuma's revenge?


----------



## MarciKS (Jan 26, 2021)

The man who went where no man has gone before.


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain klingon?


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

A Captain that could go where no man has gone before?


----------



## MarciKS (Jan 26, 2021)

James T (trots a lot) Kirk


----------



## MarciKS (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain Trotter


----------



## MarciKS (Jan 26, 2021)

Montezuma Man


----------



## MarciKS (Jan 26, 2021)

Blowout Barney


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain spot?


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain (Cap-stain)?


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain, beam me up some clean pants, Scotty?


----------



## debodun (Jan 26, 2021)

Some really funny guesses, but keep going. I admit my answer pretty far-fetched.


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain Pepto-Bismo?


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain Kaopectate?


----------



## Judycat (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain B. Cork


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

A Captain that could boldly go like no man before?


----------



## jujube (Jan 26, 2021)

An ass-troid?


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain, Uranus?

Info tidbit: Uranus is the seventh planet from the Sun.


----------



## Ceege (Jan 26, 2021)

The man who went faster than no man before?


----------



## jujube (Jan 26, 2021)

The Captain of the Enteritis-prise?   The man who colon-ized the universe?  The man who came to a rectum-ing with the Klingons?

What's the similarity between the Starship Enterprise and a wad of toilet paper? Answer: They both circle around Uranus wiping out Klingons.  OK, it's an old joke.  We're all friends now.


----------



## debodun (Jan 26, 2021)

Some pretty good and funny guesses. Not there yet. You'll probably want to shoot me when the answer is revealed.


----------



## Judycat (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain Loose Stools.


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

debodun said:


> Some pretty good and funny guesses. Not there yet. You'll probably want to shoot me when the answer is revealed.


Ah... it's one of those ones, is it! LOL!


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

Not even one stinking (pardon the pun) hint to give us, Deb?


----------



## Judycat (Jan 26, 2021)

Bathroom Jim.


----------



## jujube (Jan 26, 2021)

Azz-tech?


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain, heading for the Depends (deep ends) of outer space?


----------



## debodun (Jan 26, 2021)

Think about the title of the show and what happens in the aforementioned malady.


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain Star-$h*t?


----------



## debodun (Jan 26, 2021)

Not quite so graphic.


----------



## jujube (Jan 26, 2021)

The man who trekked off frequently to suffer the Wrath of the Khan (can)?


----------



## Pepper (Jan 26, 2021)

shtarker dreck?


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain of the Star-SHART Enterprise?


----------



## Pepper (Jan 26, 2021)

translation
An arrogant man dirty and filthy


----------



## jujube (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain Kirk went to see Dr. McCoy to find out why he had diarrhea and stomach pains.

Dr. McCoy said, "Jim, I can't find a physical cause for your problems but I suspect it's because of drinking."

"In that case, Bones," replied Kirk, "I'll come back when you're sober."


----------



## debodun (Jan 26, 2021)

I'm a doctor, Jim, not a magician.


----------



## Furryanimal (Jan 26, 2021)

warp factor 9


----------



## debodun (Jan 26, 2021)

Keep  going.


----------



## jujube (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain FastTrek?


----------



## jujube (Jan 26, 2021)

They didn't call him anything, they just stayed away from the  latrine for a few hours.


----------



## jujube (Jan 26, 2021)

You know what would have happened if they had a female captain?  She would have asked for directions and they would have gone directly to their destination instead of wandering around for years, getting into all sorts of trouble.....


----------



## hollydolly (Jan 26, 2021)

jujube said:


> You know what would have happened if they had a female captain?  She would have asked for directions and they would have directly to their destination instead of wandering around for years, getting into all sorts of trouble.....


but they did...Captain katherine  janeway


----------



## Pepper (Jan 26, 2021)

hollydolly said:


> but they did...Captain katherine  janeway


Years later, different ship.  In the original Star Trek women were not allowed to be in command. There was a whole episode about that, in which a former girlfriend of Kirk's takes over his body in order to become captain.


----------



## Pepper (Jan 26, 2021)

It was called Turnabout Intruder, Janet Lester was the woman's name, 2nd season.  She got her mind in his body, and stuck his mind in hers.  'Cause she was jealous.  

We've come a long way baby.


----------



## hollydolly (Jan 26, 2021)

Pepper said:


> Years later, different ship.


Voyager actually...( still star trek tho')


----------



## Rosemarie (Jan 26, 2021)

Pepper said:


> It was called Turnabout Intruder, Janet Lester was the woman's name, 2nd season.  She got her mind in his body, and stuck his mind in hers.  'Cause she was jealous.
> 
> We've come a long way baby.


Isn't it amazing how we remember certain things so clearly?


----------



## debodun (Jan 26, 2021)

jujube said:


> Captain FastTrek?


You're getting warm.


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain Fast-trots?


----------



## debodun (Jan 26, 2021)

Q. What did Mr. Spock see in the officer's latrine?
A. The Captain's log.


----------



## MarciKS (Jan 26, 2021)

captain farts a lot


----------



## debodun (Jan 26, 2021)

Not quite there yet.


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain Milky Way?


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

Captain Mars Bar?


----------



## Pepper (Jan 26, 2021)

Rosemarie said:


> Isn't it amazing how we remember certain things so clearly?


It's still played a lot on TV, one of the stations is BBCAmerica.


----------



## fmdog44 (Jan 26, 2021)

The guesses have to be greater than the answer (why is the a "w" in the word answer it just makes no sense)


----------



## fmdog44 (Jan 26, 2021)

Aunt Marg said:


> Captain Mars Bar?


Aunt Marg you're on fire!!


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 26, 2021)

fmdog44 said:


> Aunt Marg you're on fire!!


ROFLMAO!

Thanks, FM!


----------



## jujube (Jan 26, 2021)

OK, I give up, Deb.  Put us (and Captain Flushalot) out of our misery.


----------



## old medic (Jan 27, 2021)

Captain Squirt or Squirk


----------



## debodun (Jan 27, 2021)

There were a lot of guesses that were better than the answer I have, which BTW, was one I got from another source.

Here it is: Too-Loose LaTrek


----------



## Aunt Marg (Jan 27, 2021)

debodun said:


> There were a lot of guesses that were better than the answer I have, which BTW, was one I got from another source.
> 
> Here it is: Too-Loose LaTrek


Is there a table nearby that you can crawl under and hide, Deb? LOL!


----------

