# Ladies: what qualities in a man do you like/dislike?



## Shalimar (Mar 27, 2015)

Ladies, what qualities in a man do you find appealing/unappealing?


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## Cookie (Mar 27, 2015)

Shalimar, LOL, are you writing a relationship self-help book for seniors? Are we good research candidates?


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## hollydolly (Mar 27, 2015)

LOL@ cookie...


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## Shalimar (Mar 27, 2015)

I don't know, Cookie, I'll have to analyze that!lol.


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## hollydolly (Mar 27, 2015)

LOL shalimar we're only pulling your leg.. 

For me Pro's are generosity of spirit, and  who can laugh at themselves, with a great sense of humour yet not  too loud and too boisterous.. and who can be empathetic and supportive when the chips are down 

Someone who is young at heart regardless of their age..and who would always want to explore new places and ideas

Cons  for me... would be anyone who is the opposite of the above..


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## Shalimar (Mar 27, 2015)

Hey, Holly, I am playing too,not offended by banter. I concur with your list, I think I would add a willingness to help out at home. If I have to do all the house stuff, this woman is going on strike. On an amusing note, when my family was young, I once instituted work to rule, because I felt unappreciated. After two weeks of no baking etc. people came around! Never underestimate the power of food and make your own blasted lunch! Lol.


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## Cookie (Mar 27, 2015)

Shalimar, just kidding of course, thanks for being a good sport!

Hope this is helpful.

Positive: Empathetic and understanding, intelligent, kind, positive outlook, good sense of humor, healthy physically and emotionally well balanced.

Negative: men who are sexist, selfish, narcissistic, easily irritated, mean, narrow minded, ignorant, lazy, sloppy


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## AZ Jim (Mar 27, 2015)

I guess maybe one of the guys should make a similar post.  Wonder what the results would be....As Yul Brenner said in "The King and I", "Is a puzzlement!". OOPS!  I see there is a post for men now.


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## Ameriscot (Mar 27, 2015)

You ladies have named them all I think.


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## Shalimar (Mar 27, 2015)

Cookie, do you know any unattached men with these qualities? If so, may I please place my order ahead of the rush? Two please, I am feeling greedy today! Or perhaps need one for spare parts! Lol, lol, lol. Wicked, wicked, unrepentant me.


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## Cookie (Mar 27, 2015)

Shalimar, unfortunately, they are a rare species, sometimes seen roaming in packs on the slopes of the high Himalayas in late spring in search of wild berries and roots. Approach them with care, they will run away at great speed if startled.


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## Shalimar (Mar 27, 2015)

Oh Cookie, HaHaHaHaHa! You made me laugh so hard I spilled coffee all over my least favourite shirt. Perhaps if I forget to wash it for a week the stain will set! Re men. Are you certain you are not referencing Yetis? If not, would you care to join me on a mountain safari? Bring Rohypnol.(spelling)?


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## Cookie (Mar 27, 2015)

Shalimar, a journey such as this will take long preparation and will be very costly. Hypnotics will not be necessary, as they easily succumb to the sound of softly ringing cow bells which can only be acquired from the local villagers.


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## Shalimar (Mar 27, 2015)

Cookie, you are hysterical. Going into Virgo overdrive organization mode. How to fund is the question...I fear illegal activities are the only reliable financial source for me unless I sell my children. Thank you for the heads up regarding bells for boys! Lol.


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## Cookie (Mar 27, 2015)

Shalimar, don't do anything risky! I suggest a funding drive -  selling homemade jams, baked goods, arts and crafts sale.  Can you knit? Tourist season is coming up. It might take a while, but I know you can do it.  Don't give up.


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## Shalimar (Mar 27, 2015)

I hear you, Cookie. But I am a risk junkie. I don't knit, but I do belly dance. Perhaps would be paid more to not perform at this juncture? I will never give up!


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## oakapple (Mar 27, 2015)

Cookie, I also like the qualities you mention, but would adding handsome to the list be ok?


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## Denise1952 (Mar 27, 2015)

My sis just met a fella about a month ago, they are on a picnic/date today in fact.  I finally got to meet him this a.m.  I am not easily taken in by "plastic" people, or someone that, just isn't a good person.  Ok, I liked this man, and although I do know some things about him, like he was married 36 years, lost his wife to cancer, so that tells me he believes in commitment, that's my take anyway.  What I liked about him, was he was not trying to impress anyone, quiet, gentlemanly, big smile and attentive to my sis, calls her, asks her if she wants to go fishing, picnic, comes down from about a 150 miles to see her, and spend the day.  He seems like the type that is easy going, been to hell and back (3 tours in Viet Nam). He's right for my sis,  she's quiet, not talky like me, or goofy like me.  

I guess that's all I got for now, lol  Just been real happy for her meeting a nice feller


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## Denise1952 (Mar 27, 2015)

hollydolly said:


> LOL shalimar we're only pulling your leg..
> 
> For me Pro's are generosity of spirit, and  who can laugh at themselves, with a great sense of humour yet not  too loud and too boisterous.. and who can be empathetic and supportive when the chips are down
> 
> ...



I could have written this, well, it's like "what she said".  This describes the guy my sis has met.  They are just so cute together, and yes, I'd like to meet someone like you described.  That's so neat you know what to look for, I mean, I think you are wise


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## Denise1952 (Mar 27, 2015)

Shalimar said:


> I hear you, Cookie. But I am a risk junkie. I don't knit, but I do belly dance. Perhaps would be paid more to not perform at this juncture? I will never give up!



LOL  I was thinking you meant never give up on meeting someone, but maybe you meant you won't give up belly-dancing, good for you either way, LOL!


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## halalu (Mar 27, 2015)

Cookie said:


> Shalimar, unfortunately, they are a rare species, sometimes seen roaming in packs on the slopes of the high Himalayas in late spring in search of wild berries and roots. Approach them with care, they will run away at great speed if startled.



Cookies, cookies, I want cookies. You are so on the right track, or should I say you sound like something I would be thinking?


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## Cookie (Mar 27, 2015)

oakapple said:


> Cookie, I also like the qualities you mention, but would adding handsome to the list be ok?


If you want handsome, go ahead, but it's at your own peril. I have found handsome men can be problematic.


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## GeorgiaXplant (Mar 27, 2015)

Men? I don't remember what I used to think were good qualities. 

I guess if a man has his own place to live, his own car to drive, his own income and is literate, that might be about it.


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## hollydolly (Mar 27, 2015)

GeorgiaXplant said:


> Men? I don't remember what I used to think were good qualities.
> 
> I guess if a man has his own place to live, his own car to drive, his own income and is literate, that might be about it.



LOL well that would just about describe president  Putin... fancy a bit of him do ya... ? :lol:


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## Cookie (Mar 27, 2015)

hollydolly said:


> LOL well that would just about describe president  Putin... fancy a bit of him do ya... ? :lol:



hee hee hee..... funny girl holly..... LOL


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## Jackie22 (Mar 27, 2015)

You ladies are so funny......a good man IS hard to find.

He'd have to be very intelligent, great sense of humor, handy around the house, no couch potatoes, like to travel, plenty of money and look like an older version of George Clooney....how is that for problematic and rare.  I really think he is an endangered species.


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## Denise1952 (Mar 27, 2015)




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## GeorgiaXplant (Mar 27, 2015)

Scratch Putin. Not quite what I had in mind. See? I told you I couldn't remember.

He'd have to be kind, tolerant, mild-mannered, reasonable and not "uber" anything. I'm not fond a zealots of any stripe. He'd also have to love his family but not be so involved in his kids'/grandkids' lives that he wouldn't have any time for me.


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## Cookie (Mar 27, 2015)

more on this subject:

http://thesinglewomanguide.com/8-qualities-that-define-a-great-man/


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## hollydolly (Mar 27, 2015)

Well I have to say Cookie you seem to have found me the perfect man in that link...'cept hunni...he has no head...and really he can't look me in the eye when he's talkin' if he has no head ...now please find me a whole one.. k:


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## Cookie (Mar 27, 2015)

http://goodguyswag.com/30-characteristics-of-a-good-guy/

Is this better?  I know, he's not perfect, but hey, he does have a chin.


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## Shalimar (Mar 27, 2015)

Holly, honey, you are so greedy! Lol.


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## Denise1952 (Mar 27, 2015)

I like men with necks.


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## Cookie (Mar 27, 2015)

nwlady said:


> I like men with necks.



I agree, a neck is good.  Don't like the head sitting right on the shoulders. LOL
This is going to sound weird, but I don't like men with tiny baby noses.


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## Denise1952 (Mar 27, 2015)

I think the guys on here are going to get even, but before that happens, I might as well say it, ear and nose hair, trim it up fellas!!:lol1:

I know, you are thinking you gals need to do that too, but hey, do we get that??


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## Josiah (Mar 27, 2015)

Can't any of you woman come up with something I'm good at like map reading, taking out the trash, or maybe reaching for something on that very top shelf?


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## Shalimar (Mar 27, 2015)

Cookie, I hear you. I love strong masculine noses. Beautiful.


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## Denise1952 (Mar 27, 2015)

I can!!  You are very intelligent, I like a guy with brains!  In fact, I was the gal that prayed to meet a nutty professor type like Jimmy Stewart in "No Highway in the Sky" LOL


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## Shalimar (Mar 27, 2015)

Josiah, you are already ahead of the game because you treat women as equals.


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## Cookie (Mar 27, 2015)

Josiah said:


> Can't any of you woman come up with something I'm good at like map reading, taking out the trash, or maybe reaching for something on that very top shelf?



Josiah, I see you have a sense of humor, your tall, intelligent and helpful around the house.  You definitely get points for those things.


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## Glinda (Mar 27, 2015)

As I look back over the trail of wreckage . . . oops, I mean, as I look back over the lovely memories of men I've been involved with over the years, one thing that stands out is that I seem to have a definite preference for men from the Midwest.  Why?  Well, it's not because I favor guys who like casseroles made with tater tots.  And it's not because I like to hear guys mispronounce the word "guarantee".  I think it's because of those good old Midwestern Values:  Honesty, integrity, lack of pretense, wry humor and steadfast loyalty.  Gets me every time.  :love_heart:


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## Warrigal (Mar 27, 2015)

Josiah said:


> Can't any of you woman come up with something I'm good at like map reading, taking out the trash, or maybe reaching for something on that very top shelf?



All admirable attributes. Add to that loyalty and gentleness and the result is perfection.


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## chic (Mar 28, 2015)

I like men who are compassionate. Show me a guy who loves animals and I think here's a man with sensitivity, a very attractive quality to me. I also like men who are creative, artistic, successful and visionary. And a man who cares about the needs of a woman. Necks and noses are not super important though I do like little noses on men. I think it's cute.


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## Ameriscot (Mar 28, 2015)

nwlady said:


> I think the guys on here are going to get even, but before that happens, I might as well say it, ear and nose hair, trim it up fellas!!:lol1:
> 
> I know, you are thinking you gals need to do that too, but hey, do we get that??



Naw, we don't get the nose and ear hair but we do get chin hair.


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## Ameriscot (Mar 28, 2015)

I like a man with a nice bum/butt, compassionate, always stays calm in emergencies and knows what to do, nice to kids and animals, funny, responsible with money, good cook, not too big a beer belly, not lazy, nature lover.


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## Ameriscot (Mar 28, 2015)

nwlady said:


> My sis just met a fella about a month ago, they are on a picnic/date today in fact.  I finally got to meet him this a.m.  I am not easily taken in by "plastic" people, or someone that, just isn't a good person.  Ok, I liked this man, and although I do know some things about him, like he was married 36 years, lost his wife to cancer, so that tells me he believes in commitment, that's my take anyway.  What I liked about him, was he was not trying to impress anyone, quiet, gentlemanly, big smile and attentive to my sis, calls her, asks her if she wants to go fishing, picnic, comes down from about a 150 miles to see her, and spend the day.  He seems like the type that is easy going, been to hell and back (3 tours in Viet Nam). He's right for my sis,  she's quiet, not talky like me, or goofy like me.
> 
> I guess that's all I got for now, lol  Just been real happy for her meeting a nice feller



Sounds good!  Keep us posted on sis and her new fella.


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## Ameriscot (Mar 28, 2015)

Josiah said:


> Can't any of you woman come up with something I'm good at like map reading, taking out the trash, or maybe reaching for something on that very top shelf?



Map reading is important as I'm crap at it.  I rely on my DH unless I'm alone and have no option.  He's always amazed at my lack of sense of direction. But I remind him that I drove all over Ireland using paper maps by myself and only got lost once.


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## Glinda (Mar 28, 2015)

Ameriscot said:


> Map reading is important as I'm crap at it.  I rely on my DH unless I'm alone and have no option.  He's always amazed at my lack of sense of direction. But I remind him that I drove all over Ireland using paper maps by myself and only got lost once.



And you drove on the WRONG side of the road!  :drive:


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## Ameriscot (Mar 28, 2015)

Glinda said:


> And you drove on the WRONG side of the road!  :drive:



Tsk, tsk. You mean the OTHER side of the road.   And now that I've been driving on the left for 15 years driving in the US throws me into a tizzy!! And all those turn lanes and stop signs drive me nuts!


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## Glinda (Mar 28, 2015)

To me it will always be the wrong side - but I admire you for your ability to adjust.


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## GeorgiaXplant (Mar 28, 2015)

Map reading? We don't need maps anymore; we have GPS (usually comes already built into the car).

How about a man who can hang a ceiling fan, install an electrical outlet, put up a shelf, replace a window or door screen AND figure out what to do when The Blue Screen of Death appears on a computer.


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## hollydolly (Mar 28, 2015)

GeorgiaXplant said:


> Map reading? We don't need maps anymore; we have GPS (usually comes already built into the car).
> 
> *How about a man who can hang a ceiling fan, install an electrical outlet, put up a shelf, replace a window or door screen AND figure out what to do when The Blue Screen of Death appears on a computer.*




Nope no matter how you plead and beg young lady you're not having mine...


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## GeorgiaXplant (Mar 28, 2015)

I had one like that, Hollydolly. That's why I mentioned those things. There were two like that? Well, now there's only one and you have him. Actually, he's probably much too young for me anyway. If I were looking, I'd be looking between the ages of 75-80, but I'm not looking. Good grief, I haven't even taken off my wedding ring yet!


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## hollydolly (Mar 28, 2015)

Awww Georgia..(about the wedding ring)....and yep if you're looking for 75 plus then mine is waaayyy to young..he's only 54..


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## GeorgiaXplant (Mar 28, 2015)

My son will be 54 in September...just sayin'


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## hollydolly (Mar 28, 2015)

OMG I'm talking to my Mother-in-law here... *Yikes* sorry ma, I never meant anything I said bad about yer boy... raying:


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## Ameriscot (Mar 28, 2015)

GeorgiaXplant said:


> Map reading? We don't need maps anymore; we have GPS (usually comes already built into the car).
> 
> How about a man who can hang a ceiling fan, install an electrical outlet, put up a shelf, replace a window or door screen AND figure out what to do when The Blue Screen of Death appears on a computer.



My trip was in 1998.  Don't even know if it was an option then in my rental car, but we used GPS soon after.


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## Ameriscot (Mar 28, 2015)

GeorgiaXplant said:


> I had one like that, Hollydolly. That's why I mentioned those things. There were two like that? Well, now there's only one and you have him. Actually, he's probably much too young for me anyway. If I were looking, I'd be looking between the ages of 75-80, but I'm not looking. Good grief, I haven't even taken off my wedding ring yet!



I've got one that can do all that as well.  But I'm keeping him.  He's 66.


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## Ameriscot (Mar 28, 2015)

Glinda said:


> To me it will always be the wrong side - but I admire you for your ability to adjust.



It only took about two weeks to get used to driving on the left.  Now the right side feels wrong.  I much prefer roundabouts now as well, much more efficient than all the stoplights in the US.

When the US navy was in this area the sailors were always told never to say wrong side of the road, say other side.


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## Denise1952 (Mar 28, 2015)

They had a good time AM, and they are planning to get together again week after next, as her son, wife, my niece, and my bro are coming down.  They are going to meet him, and give him a hard time, LOL!!  3rd degree, that kind of thing

He has a home up North, and sis has this place, so things can't move too fast.  Don't know whether that is good or bad, depends on the people right

She did meet him online by the way  Gives me hope that there might be someone out there for me (I know you guys, and some gals are praying for those unsuspecting fellers that might have the misfortune of meeting up with me, LOL).  Anyway, they are enjoying each other.  I love the fact he doesn't drink at all, my sis won't drink because any time she did when she was younger, she drank to the point of passing out in her scrambled eggs.  This was only like once a year so she just didn't get enough practice I guess, LOL!!


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## Ameriscot (Mar 28, 2015)

nwlady said:


> They had a good time AM, and they are planning to get together again week after next, as her son, wife, my niece, and my bro are coming down.  They are going to meet him, and give him a hard time, LOL!!  3rd degree, that kind of thing
> 
> He has a home up North, and sis has this place, so things can't move too fast.  Don't know whether that is good or bad, depends on the people right
> 
> She did meet him online by the way  Gives me hope that there might be someone out there for me (I know you guys, and some gals are praying for those unsuspecting fellers that might have the misfortune of meeting up with me, LOL).  Anyway, they are enjoying each other.  I love the fact he doesn't drink at all, my sis won't drink because any time she did when she was younger, she drank to the point of passing out in her scrambled eggs.  This was only like once a year so she just didn't get enough practice I guess, LOL!!



Nice!  Sounds good.  Will either be willing to move if things get serious?


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## Denise1952 (Mar 28, 2015)

Oh yeah, I'm sure


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## Shalimar (Mar 29, 2015)

I like men who are emotionally available. And willing/able to communicate. It is very difficult to maintain a relationship while sentenced to solitary confinement in your head.


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## Kadee (Mar 29, 2015)

I have a hubby who can fix and build what ever he puts his hands also, He put up our back verandah 4 x 14 Mtrs on his own staring on his 60 th birthday,Built the shed 7 x 14 Mtrs , that was 8 years ago . After getting this home built the only people we paid to do anything here was for the cement paths and drive way, hubby added extra power points, put up ceiling fans ,made our TV antenna, (we needed a large one to pick up Adelaide TV)


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## Cookie (Mar 29, 2015)

Shalimar said:


> I like men who are emotionally available. And willing/able to communicate. It is very difficult to maintain a relationship while sentenced to solitary confinement in your head.



That's a big one for me too. I love a man who will talk and listen and tell me what's on his mind.


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## AprilT (Mar 29, 2015)

A man who is perfectly capable of feeling whole without needing anyone else to complete him, he doesn't feel like he is missing something without another person to pull his life together, he's strong in mind, confidant, witty, compassionate, caring, has integrity and likes animals mainly dogs.    One more very important thing, he isn't possessive.   And this is why I shall remain single.


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## Josiah (Mar 29, 2015)

AprilT said:


> A man who is perfectly capable of feeling whole without needing anyone else to complete him, he doesn't feel like he is missing something without another person to pull his life together, he's strong in mind, confidant, witty, compassionate, caring, has integrity and likes animals mainly dogs.    One more very important thing, he isn't possessive.   And this is why I shall remain single.



Hey April it sounds like you're describing yourself (not needing anyone to complete YOU) justifying why you've chosen to remain single. NOTE, I'm not dis'in anything you said.


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## AprilT (Mar 29, 2015)

Josiah said:


> Hey April it sounds like you're describing yourself (not needing anyone to complete YOU) justifying why you've chosen to remain single. NOTE, I'm not dis'in anything you said.



Well many people want a mate with similar qualities, there are quite a few others to make a person whole outside of those.  I am quite vulnerable alongside some of those qualities that I would want in a long term companion and have many other qualities as I would think the other person would have.  It takes more than a few snippets to tell the entirety of what all there is to a person that really causes two people to really deeply care for each other in a way that makes them want to bond in a special way.  I just described some of the things that are most important starting out where I won't instantly tune someone out as far as seeing them for long term potential.

And you are correct, I don't need anyone to make me feel whole, but, I sure need my friends and family to feel life if fulfilling.


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