# Engineering Conversions



## SeaBreeze (Mar 12, 2014)

Ratio of an igloo's circumference to its diameter: Eskimo Pi

 2000 pounds of Chinese soup: Won ton

 1 millionth of a mouthwash: 1 microscope

 Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement: 1 bananosecond

 Weight an evangelist carries with God: 1 billigram

 Time it takes to sail 220 yards at 1 nautical mile per hour: Knot-furlong

 365.25 days of drinking low-calorie beer because it's less filling: 1 lite year

 16.5 feet in the Twilight Zone: 1 Rod Serling

 Half of a large intestine: 1 semicolon

 1000 aches: 1 kilohurtz

 Basic unit of laryngitis: 1 hoarsepower

 Shortest distance between two jokes: A straight line.

 453.6 graham crackers: 1 pound cake

 1 million microphones: 1 megaphone

 1 million bicycles: 2 megacycles

 2000 mockingbirds: two kilomockingbirds

 10 cards: 1 decacards

 1 kilogram of falling figs: 1 Fig Newton

 1000 cubic centimeters of wet socks: 1 literhosen

 1 millionth of a fish: 1 microfiche

 1 trillion pins: 1 terrapin

 10 rations: 1 decoration

 100 rations: 1 C-ration

 2 monograms: 1 diagram

 8 nickels: 2 paradigms

 3 statute miles of intravenous surgical tubing at Yale University Hospital: 1 I.V. League

 100 Senators: Not 1 decision


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## Warrigal (Mar 12, 2014)

:lofl:


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## Sid (Mar 12, 2014)

Good ones SeaBreeze


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## SifuPhil (Mar 13, 2014)

I think one of the conversions is confusing -

*10 cards = 1 decacards*

While I understand how the Latin prefix "deca-" means "10" I am pressed to recall what game requires a deck of only 10 cards. Three Card Monte requires 3, the Four Ace Trick requires 5 and I believe that 9 Card Stud requires 9, but a game requiring 10 cards eludes me.

Now, if we were to multiply this decacards by 5.2000 we would have the standard Poker deck, therefore:

*52 cards = 5.2 decacards*

Through the use of Planck's Constant (6.62606957 × 10[SUP]-34[/SUP] m[SUP]2[/SUP] kg/s):

*5.2 decacards = 34.4555 x 10[SUP]-34[/SUP] m[SUP]2[/SUP] kg/s*

And converting to molality:


```
[B]Molality[/B]=  # of moles that salute / Mass of Solvency = 3 (the rest refused to salute) / Wednesday Night before Bingo
```

Therefore, *42 cards = one decacards.*


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## Falcon (Mar 13, 2014)

Funny ones , Seabreeze.  LOL    Thanks.


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## SeaBreeze (Mar 13, 2014)

SifuPhil said:


> I think one of the conversions is confusing -
> 
> *10 cards = 1 decacards*
> 
> ...



:saywhat:


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## SifuPhil (Mar 13, 2014)

SeaBreeze said:


> :saywhat:



Just gathering wool and trying to stay out of trouble ...


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## RCynic (Mar 13, 2014)

42 cards?

Are you a Douglas Adams fan by any chance?


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## RCynic (Mar 13, 2014)

This has made the rounds on the Internet and, given the topic, seems appropriate in this thread. For those that haven't seen it before, enjoy.

After every flight, pilots fill out a form, called a gripe sheet which tells mechanics about problems with the aircraft. The mechanics correct the problems, document their repairs on the form, and then pilots review the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews lack a sense of humor. Here are some maintenance complaints submitted by pilots and the solutions recorded by maintenance engineers. By the way, the airline these came from is the only major airline that has never, ever, had an accident.

Pilot: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement. Engineers: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

Pilot: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough. Engineers: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

Pilot: Something loose in cockpit. Engineers: Something tightened in cockpit.

Pilot: Dead bugs on windshield. Engineers: Live bugs on back-order.

Pilot: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent. Engineers: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

Pilot: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear. Engineers: Evidence removed.

Pilot: DME volume unbelievably loud. Engineers: DME volume set to more believable level.

Pilot: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick. Engineers: That's what friction locks are for.

Pilot: IFF inoperative in OFF mode. Engineers: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

Pilot: Suspected crack in windshield. Engineers: Suspect you're right.

Pilot: Number 3 engine missing. Engineers: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

Pilot: Aircraft handles funny. Engineers: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

Pilot: Target radar hums. Engineers: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

Pilot: Mouse in cockpit. Engineers: Cat installed.

Pilot: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer. Engineers: Took hammer away from midget


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## SifuPhil (Mar 13, 2014)

RCynic said:


> 42 cards?
> 
> Are you a Douglas Adams fan by any chance?



On the nose - excellent!


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## SeaBreeze (Mar 13, 2014)

Pilot/Engineers, very funny RCynic! :applause2:


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## Michael. (Mar 14, 2014)

Very funny.

*(1) Engineering Conversions 

(2) Pilots fill out a form, called a gripe sheet.(Golden Oldie)
.
*



.


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## Falcon (Mar 14, 2014)

Excellent retorts from the ground crew.  :lol1:


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