# Feeling Sorry for Some Grandparents Lately, Who Seem to Be Beaten Down Watching their Grandkids



## SeaBreeze (Jun 26, 2017)

I'm not saying all the grandparents out there, there are some who have a well behaved grandchild with them or grandchildren that they are enjoying and engaging with, etc.  But lately, especially today I really started thinking about it, I see a lot of grandparents who are obviously babysitting their grandkids, and the kids might not be so calm and well behaved.

I was in Walmart today, and then did some shopping at the grocery store.  Some grandmas and grandpas really seemed to be depressed, beaten down, they seemed very sad to be in their situation.  I can only assume that they cared for the kids they were with too frequently, if not everyday.

I was thinking, and I might be wrong in some situations, that they were worn out, and being used as regular full-time sitters.  I started to think that they probably worked hard all their lives, finally retired, and still got no rest.....and maybe no appreciation for all they do.  Some faces seemed blank, almost robotic.

I can't even imagine having to deal with young kids, especially the ones that are a bit wild, all day long like that, or even for half a day on a regular basis.  I thought they should be able to relax and enjoy their golden years in peace and quiet, have some "me" time for once in their old age.

Maybe I'm just imagining too much, but I tell you, I've been noticing blank sad looks on these older men and women and it actually saddens me a bit just to think about it. 

What are your thoughts?  Do you think a lot of grandparents are taken advantage of by their sons or daughters, and not able to really enjoy their last good years in this life?


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## Aunt Bea (Jun 27, 2017)

I think that it is a fact of life for many older folks.   Many times their children have made bad choices that resulted in having their children placed in the care of their parents.

In the complex where I live I know one older woman who is paid a stipend by the government to care for her grandchildren after school and during the day in the summer while the parents work.  I'm not sure how I feel about that program but on the surface it sounds like the fleecing of America to me.

I guess every situation is different and it is hard to tell what is going on from what we see when we are out and about.


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## Don M. (Jun 27, 2017)

We...or at least, my wife, watched 2 granddaughters for about 4 years, until they reached school age.  Our daughter and her husband were just getting a good start on their careers, so that helped them.  Plus, my wife didn't work outside the home, so she had a ball with the little ones, for several hours a day.  It turned out to be a great experience for everyone, and contributed to a close family.  But then, we were in our 40's, so keeping up with a couple of little energetic girls was more fun than work.  Now, that great grandchildren are here, the family "babysitting" has moved on to the next generation....we are too old to spend more than a few hours with most of those little tykes.  The oldest Great granddaughter is now 11 years old, and for the past couple of years, she comes with us for a week every Summer, and that is a real treat...she's a joy to have around.


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## SeaBreeze (Jun 27, 2017)

Don, that sounds like the perfect and healthy family situation, I'm glad your daughter is considerate and I'm sure your granddaughters were delightful to have around.  I love hearing of those good situations.  The people I'm talking about are older, like us here, and likely retired from their work, but appear to be very downhearted.  Like I say not all, but too many I've noticed.

Bea, I agree it's hard to tell the real situation from just observations when out and about, but it's been tugging on my heartstrings lately.  I don't have kids, so I've never been personally exposed to such a problem.  I would hope my son or daughter wouldn't take advantage of me in my old age.  I don't think the government should be paying to babysit family, it does sound like fleecing, but I don't want to get into political talk here on this thread.


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## Wren (Jun 27, 2017)

This is more or less the norm where I live, most women return to work once their children are born and it mainly falls on the grandparents to care for them as childcare is so expensive, I know ladies in their late 60's and older that do it

I personally think it's very unfair, but sadly, these days people seem to 'want it all' the fancy cars, latest technology, holidays abroad, beautiful homes, designer clothes, a great social life, and the grandparents pay the price, God forbid they should actually make a few sacrifices and lower their standard of living while they bring their own kids up.....


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## Lon (Jun 27, 2017)

My daughter just can't get enough of her five grand kids and she works. They are good kids and all within 15 minutes of Nana.


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## terry123 (Jun 28, 2017)

Yeah, its different now.  We never felt we had to have the latest things around.  We made good use of our church's day care services and we felt safe doing that as the workers were mainly friends.  My family lived in another state but I would never have asked them to keep our children full time. In the summer they would invite them to spend time with them and that was good for all of us.  A good time was had by all.


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