# Family still living with us..



## Leah (Apr 11, 2017)

My husband daughter and her boyfriend are living with us and there two children.They were only supposed to be here for two months tops we are now in to ten months .The problem is he's not working and now she only works weekends.He dies receive a check from his past job but that's only going to last a bit longer .He sleeps all day does nothing,while she plays with the kids etc .While I do not mind us helping them I see no progress in him finding work etc .. I feel like we are getting taken advantage of some here and I hate feeling this way but when he's not even trying to go out look for work etc it makes me feel this way .Thank you for letting me vent some here ..Leah


----------



## SeaBreeze (Apr 11, 2017)

It's very kind of you and your husband to open your home to them temporarily, but if it's already nearing a year then they are taking advantage for sure.  Maybe if you all could get together and have a serious heart to heart about their goals and future together on their own.  He should at least be looking for work not only to help you out more with expenses, but to work on living independently with his own family.  Perhaps give them a time limit when they will have to get a place of their own would give them some incentive?  I'd be frustrated in that situation, hope you can light a fire under him to get moving...good luck.


----------



## Leah (Apr 12, 2017)

SeaBreeze said:


> It's very kind of you and your husband to open your home to them temporarily, but if it's already nearing a year then they are taking advantage for sure.  Maybe if you all could get together and have a serious heart to heart about their goals and future together on their own.  He should at least be looking for work not only to help you out more with expenses, but to work on living independently with his own family.  Perhaps give them a time limit when they will have to get a place of their own would give them some incentive?  I'd be frustrated in that situation, hope you can light a fire under him to get moving...good luck.



Thank you kindly for your advice .Yes we have given them time limit which has since passed .We have had talks with them about work helping out etc .His daughter should exspect more but I think she just doesn't know how to handle things at this point with him .We have been getting the same story about the same job for almost a year .It's very frustrating for me because I am stuck in the middle because of Brittany bring my husband daughter I can only say so much about the situation..Leah


----------



## maggiemae (Apr 12, 2017)

Since it is your husband's daughter, he needs to step up to the plate and give them a definite time that they need to be out of there.  That would keep you from being the "mean ole Step Mom".  I am sure the situation has put a strain on your relationship with your husband. It is very hard for two and three generations living under the same roof.  Sorry, but sounds like the "boyfriend" needs to get the "boot"!


----------



## Leah (Apr 12, 2017)

maggiemae said:


> Since it is your husband's daughter, he needs to step up to the plate and give them a definite time that they need to be out of there.  That would keep you from being the "mean ole Step Mom".  I am sure the situation has put a strain on your relationship with your husband. It is very hard for two and three generations living under the same roof.  Sorry, but sounds like the "boyfriend" needs to get the "boot"!



Thank you we are working on getting them into there own place soon hopefully...leah


----------



## hauntedtexan (Apr 12, 2017)

I have an old friend who is dealing with pretty much the same situation, it's been 4 years..... I asked her "what good is this doing and how are they going to survive real life after you're gone?" My late wife asked me to help her "inspire" her daughter and her son-in-law to move forward in life. Moving forward, we made up a sort of contract that stated what was expected, what would not be tolerated, their chores and responsibilities, and financial obligations. When the expected resistance happened, we just told them we knew how tough it is to have to rely on someone else for living conditions and simply stated that they would be able to make the rules when they were on their own and we had to come live with them so they could change our diapers. They were gone 2 months later, and are now financially responsible for their own selves. (we also started to make more love making sounds at night, weather we were doing anything or not) That had to help....:eeew:


----------



## Leah (Apr 12, 2017)

hauntedtexan said:


> I have an old friend who is dealing with pretty much the same situation, it's been 4 years..... I asked her "what good is this doing and how are they going to survive real life after you're gone?" My late wife asked me to help her "inspire" her daughter and her son-in-law to move forward in life. Moving forward, we made up a sort of contract that stated what was expected, what would not be tolerated, their chores and responsibilities, and financial obligations. When the expected resistance happened, we just told them we knew how tough it is to have to rely on someone else for living conditions and simply stated that they would be able to make the rules when they were on their own and we had to come live with them so they could change our diapers. They were gone 2 months later, and are now financially responsible for their own selves. (we also started to make more love making sounds at night, weather we were doing anything or not) That had to help....:eeew:



Food for thought,I love this thank you.lesh


----------



## Iodine (Apr 13, 2017)

More lovemaking sounds?  Oh you two were so funny!!  I bet you miss your wife.


----------



## hauntedtexan (Apr 13, 2017)

Iodine said:


> More lovemaking sounds?  Oh you two were so funny!!  I bet you miss your wife.


More than I can handle, some days....


----------



## terry123 (Jun 19, 2017)

I feel the same way Texan sometimes.  Its hard for me to go anywhere by myself but I have decided to try and do so. I know I will never marry again but it would be nice to have some one to be with and go places with.  I did create a FB page to keep up with new pics of  the "grands, friends and high school friends but last week I was messaged by someone I didn't know and asked to friend me.  Since I did not know who the hell he was I said no and immediately turned off the chat feature for my page. I have enjoyed my high school graduation FB page as  its nice to see old friends I have not seen since then.  Going to try and attend our next reunion.


----------

