# How long do you go without talking to others?



## C50 (Jun 24, 2022)

I'm the type of person who has no issues being alone, actually prefer it for the most part, yet still talk with others most every day.  Other times I'll go a couple of days without talking to anyone, but usually never longer than that.

I have an older brother ( not a very nice person) who will go months without talking to anyone.  That might be longer than I would like.

How about you?  What do you prefer?  What's the longest you've gone without speaking to another person?


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## Geezer Garage (Jun 24, 2022)

Generally a few days is normal. Sometimes as long as a week.


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## Pecos (Jun 24, 2022)

On solo back packing excursions, I have gone for 3 or 4 days, but other than that I interact every day.


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## Lewkat (Jun 24, 2022)

If I can consider my dog a person, almost 5 minutes.


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## Pepper (Jun 24, 2022)

Unless he's on a rare family vacation, my son calls me every day.  He has skipped a few times but not usually.

If I need to speak to people, I go out and will generally find someone at least to say hello to.

My cat constantly talks to me.  I answer her.  She needs to know certain things, so I make sure to clue her in.


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## Bella (Jun 24, 2022)

It depends. I can go a week or longer without speaking to anyone I know, and it doesn't bother me to go longer than that. Sometimes the only people I speak to are store clerks. There are times I just don't feel like speaking to anyone. In which case I just let calls go to voice mail and I don't make plans to see anyone. If I don't feel like talking, I'm just not compelled to see people or pick up the phone. 

If I get questioned, I honestly tell people that I haven't called back or made a date because I just haven't felt like talking. I'm not mad at anyone or anti-social, sometimes it's just so much drivel and I don't wanna hear it because it wears me out. I have no problem being alone and no trouble amusing myself. 

 I can have contact whenever I feel like it, but I don't always want to. Call me weird, lol. 

Bella


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## Gary O' (Jun 24, 2022)

C50 said:


> How about you? What do you prefer? What's the longest you've gone without speaking to another person?


Eons ago, when I rode the rails, several days
Didn't seem to bother me

Cabin fever in winter gets a bit weird

On the other hand, I tend to yearn for no dialogue after being around a non-stop chatty cathy or charlie


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## hollydolly (Jun 24, 2022)

Bella said:


> It depends. I can go a week or longer without speaking to anyone I know, and it doesn't bother me to go longer than that. Sometimes the only people I speak to are store clerks. There are times I just don't feel like speaking to anyone. In which case I just let calls go to voice mail and I don't make plans to see anyone. If I don't feel like talking, I'm just not compelled to see people or pick up the phone.
> 
> If I get questioned, I honestly tell people that I haven't called back or made a date because I just haven't felt like talking. I'm not mad at anyone or anti-social, sometimes it's just so much drivel and I don't wanna hear it because it wears me out. I have no problem being alone and no trouble amusing myself.
> 
> ...


you sound like me... Since my husband left I go days without speaking to another soul... sometimes  a week.. I really have to get out of that tbh.

This week I've spoken verbally to my hairdresser, and her colleague  who came and chatted to me about the colour of my  nails.. and my dd who rang for 10 minutes yesterday... otherwise it's all whatsapp with everyone, or  this forum


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## Wren (Jun 24, 2022)

I didn’t realise how much interaction I have with people on a daily basis until I read these posts, especially given the fact that I live alone

I have a long conversation with my daughter each evening on FaceTime and sometimes coffee together in the morning, meet up with at least one friend a day for coffee or lunch, chat with assistants in the shops I use  each day, neighbours, friends that ring for a chat

I don’t mind my own company but cannot imagine going days without talking to anybody


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## Aunt Bea (Jun 24, 2022)

Most of my conversations are casual exchanges with strangers when I’m out for a walk or running errands.

A couple of times a year I talk or text with a couple of family members and close friends.


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## Kika (Jun 24, 2022)

I can go a week or more without talking to another human being.  Most of my conversation with friends is thru texting.  If I really need to say something, Alexa usually answers me non-judgmentally.


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## timoc (Jun 24, 2022)

I have a friend I visit several times a week or she and I wave to each other from our windows each morning.
All the ladies at the checkouts in the supermarket give me a big smile after I tell them how lovely they are looking today.


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## Remy (Jun 24, 2022)

My stepfather calls every evening. He started it. And I don't want to talk to him that often but I'm not cruel enough to tell him what I actually think of him.

Other than that it's just people I interact with during shopping. I find most of the people I interact with at work to have a negative affect on me. One person I totally trust at work is kind of grumpy and stressed at work and any real in depth conversation is out. I'm busy too. But if I need to vent or run something by her, she's the only one a trust and can give a few good words of encouragement.


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## DaveA (Jun 24, 2022)

A few hours at most. We share our home with one of our daughters, her husband and 2 mid/early 20's grandkids, We GAVE them the home back in 1995 with the provision that we would live out our lives here.  It's been wonderful and as we approach our 90's it's a great comfort to have help available when needed.
Another daughter lives about 12 minutes from here and her two daughters live even closer.  All of us and a couple of the great grands see each other regularly.

We never lack someone to talk with and our social life is mostly within the family.


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## Just Jeff (Jun 24, 2022)

C50 said:


> What's the longest you've gone without speaking to another person?


Nine months.


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## Nathan (Jun 24, 2022)

After my last divorce I lived alone for several years.  Would go a day or 2(on my off days from work); if on vacation maybe 3 or 4 days at a time, depending on whether I was at home or in public.
I'm not a telephone chit-chatter, actually dislike talking on the phone.


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## Pinky (Jun 24, 2022)

timoc said:


> I have a friend I visit several times a week or she and I wave to each other from our windows each morning.
> All the ladies at the checkouts in the supermarket give me a big smile after I tell them how lovely they are looking today.


If you smile at them, as in your avatar, I can see how you would charm these ladies


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## Lee (Jun 24, 2022)

I cannot imagine a day going by without talking to someone.....or yelling at someone perhaps.


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## Mitch86 (Jun 24, 2022)

If you are lonely and rarely speak to another human being, you can go to the Internet Chess Club, Channel 97, and folks speak there most of every day.  I go there to chat with others when my wife is sleeping and I get lonely.  However, beware all kinds of wackos also go there and you may not like what they are talking about.


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## RubyK (Jun 24, 2022)

Aunt Bea said:


> Most of my conversations are casual exchanges with strangers when I’m out for a walk or running errands.
> 
> A couple of times a year I talk or text with a couple of family members and close friends.


Me, too @Aunt Bea.


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## Lee (Jun 24, 2022)

Anyone on this forum who starts or responds to a post is communicating. Just a different way of talking.


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## Just Jeff (Jun 24, 2022)

The Creator went four hundred years without talking with men.

https://www.compellingtruth.org/400-years-of-silence.html


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## officerripley (Jun 24, 2022)

Too long most of the time. Over the years, most of the people I've really enjoyed talking and listening to didn't seem to feel the same way about me. So I talk to my dog a lot too.


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## Jan14 (Jun 24, 2022)

I’m recuperating from major surgery and having minimal contact with people.  I do ok if I can talk to at least one person in a day, or texting a little.  I do miss working, that’s always been a big part of my social life.  I’m hoping to work part time again in a few months.


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## officerripley (Jun 24, 2022)

Jan14 said:


> I’m recuperating from major surgery and having minimal contact with people.  I do ok if I can talk to at least one person in a day, or texting a little.  I do miss working, that’s always been a big part of my social life.  I’m hoping to work part time again in a few months.


Hope you recovery soon!


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## J-Kat (Jun 24, 2022)

My dog and I have continual discussions about the state of the world.  She requires me to talk for her which I am glad to do.  I usually wave to a neighbor or two when I walk out to get the mail and sometimes we meet in the street and have a how ya doin' chat.  If I have not seen my next door neighbor for a day or two I will call her and talk for a bit.  She knows all the gossip.  My niece and I text occasionally.  So, I would guess every 3-4 days I have some kind of human interaction.  That's enough for me.


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## dseag2 (Jun 24, 2022)

I talk with my cats every morning when I wake up and sometimes throughout the day.  I swear they understand what I am saying.  At least their names.  They don't understand when I tell them to get off the kitchen counter.

I also talk with my partner every day when he gets home from work.  It's usually a short conversation, since I've done nothing interesting during the day and his workplace is a non-profit so the people are nice and there is no drama.  He gets angry about current politics, so we don't discuss that.  After 30 years, there isn't much to say so we just watch TV and talk about how bad some of the renovations are on HGTV.  

I do talk to people in the grocery store occasionally and I call my friends once a week to chat.


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## Ruthanne (Jun 24, 2022)

I am a person who needs my space and aloneness at times.  It varies as to how long I take breaks from people.  Depends really.


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## ElCastor (Jun 24, 2022)

My wife is still with me, so of course we speak constantly, and there are friends, neighbors, and relatives, but we aren't getting any younger. Should she go before I do I dread the loneliness. My heart goes out to the people in this group who are experiencing that loneliness. It has to be beyond tough.


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## SeniorBen (Jun 24, 2022)

I rarely go a day without talking to someone, but I do spend most of the day alone, and that's just fine with me.


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## MarciKS (Jun 25, 2022)

C50 said:


> I'm the type of person who has no issues being alone, actually prefer it for the most part, yet still talk with others most every day.  Other times I'll go a couple of days without talking to anyone, but usually never longer than that.
> 
> I have an older brother ( not a very nice person) who will go months without talking to anyone.  That might be longer than I would like.
> 
> How about you?  What do you prefer?  What's the longest you've gone without speaking to another person?


Depends. Most days I am forced to have conversation with co-workers. Whether I want to or not. When I'm off, I do my level best to not talk to people unless it's via chat. And sometimes not even that. Sometimes I get in moods where I don't talk to anyone for days. I live alone and never get any company or phone calls so I'm ok with it.


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## Patricia (Jun 25, 2022)

I talk to people daily,


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## Tish (Jun 25, 2022)

Between my children (the youngest one lives with me) and grandchildren, I am lucky to go 1 day without communicating with someone.
That being said I am fine with my own company.

There is no chance of turning my phone off, the last time I did that the police knocked on my door to do a welfare check, sent by my daughter


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## katlupe (Jun 25, 2022)

My boyfriend calls me every morning as soon as he wakes up. He calls me several times a day and always before he goes to bed or thinks I will be going to bed. My son lives a couple blocks away and he comes here almost daily. Doesn't stay very long but we talk. I live alone but in an apartment building so I see people in person often. I have a few friends in the building who stop in to talk. 

Online I talk to many different people through out my day.


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## Patricia (Jun 25, 2022)

MarciKS said:


> Depends. Most days I am forced to have conversation with co-workers. Whether I want to or not. When I'm off, I do my level best to not talk to people unless it's via chat. And sometimes not even that. Sometimes I get in moods where I don't talk to anyone for days. I live alone and never get any company or phone calls so I'm ok with it.





ElCastor said:


> My wife is still with me, so of course we speak constantly, and there are friends, neighbors, and relatives, but we aren't getting any younger. Should she go before I do I dread the loneliness. My heart goes out to the people in this group who are experiencing that loneliness. It has to be beyond tough.



My brother called every night to check on me before he passed away. When my mother passed away, I made sure my dad wasn't lonely.  He lived quite a while after her passing.  My dad was two weeks away from 96 when he passed away in September. I miss my him so much.  Yes, life can feel much different without the people who have your best interest at heart.


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## Wren (Jun 25, 2022)

Just Jeff said:


> The Creator went four hundred years without talking with men.
> 
> https://www.compellingtruth.org/400-years-of-silence.html


Could’ve save myself a lot of heartache  if I’d taken a leaf out of his book....


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## MarciKS (Jun 25, 2022)

Patricia said:


> My brother called every night to check on me before he passed away. When my mother passed away, I made sure my dad wasn't lonely.  He lived quite a while after her passing.  My dad was two weeks away from 96 when he passed away in September. I miss my him so much.  Yes, life can feel much different without the people who have your best interest at heart.


Father and I were never close. Mostly because he worked all the time and he was always grouchy. So now our relationship is just awkward. Mom's gone so I can't call her anymore and conversations with Dad just aren't the same. It's like talking to a complete stranger.

We email *a little* each day so we know the other is ok but that's it.


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## Right Now (Jun 25, 2022)

Oh gosh.  I am a social person.  Every day I see people at the grocery store, in the aisles, small chats, or go for a walk in my local park.  It's a small village, and my careers brought me front and center with folks, we all know and respond to each other.  I also help others in my apartment building daily, checking on them as they are older than me (notice I didn't include myself in that).
Also, friends call for lunch dates, dinner, shopping, movies, or just to catch up once a week.
Oddly enough, at the end of a day if I realize I haven't spoken to another person, I look forward to the next day's interactions.
That said, I also need alone time every single day.  I can't be around people 24/7.  _Me time _is my breathing time.


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## Serenity4321 (Jun 25, 2022)

I think it is healthy to enjoy and be comfortable being alone. I have no problem doing so. I do rely on u-tube a lot. LOL I think one can find anything on u-tube!!  I have noticed sometimes when I feel tired and then talk to people I am totally energized..people do that for me so when I go anywhere I talk to everyone..


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## fuzzybuddy (Jun 25, 2022)

I have 24 hour access to the most stimulating conversationalist.- ME. I constantly talk, out loud, to myself. But I can go a week without talking to someone else. Of course, I "talk" here, too.


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## Patricia (Jun 25, 2022)

MarciKS said:


> Father and I were never close. Mostly because he worked all the time and he was always grouchy. So now our relationship is just awkward. Mom's gone so I can't call her anymore and conversations with Dad just aren't the same. It's like talking to a complete stranger.
> 
> We email *a little* each day so we know the other is ok but that's it.


At least an e mail should make you feel better than no communication.  Every little bit of affection helps.


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## Sunny (Jun 25, 2022)

I live alone in my own condo, but our building is a bustling, friendly place, so I can always find someone to talk to, or activities, when I want them. I think being truly "alone" and never talking to anyone would be incredibly lonely.  But I like the balance of socializing when I want it, and doing my own thing, with my own thoughts, when I want that.

Jan, I've also found that texting, especially with my family, is really not too different from talking. The internet and our cell phones have been a godsend that way.


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## palides2021 (Jun 25, 2022)

Jan14 said:


> I’m recuperating from major surgery and having minimal contact with people.  I do ok if I can talk to at least one person in a day, or texting a little.  I do miss working, that’s always been a big part of my social life.  I’m hoping to work part time again in a few months.


Wishing you a speedy reovery!


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## Patricia (Jun 25, 2022)

SeniorBen said:


> I rarely go a day without talking to someone, but I do spend most of the day alone, and that's just fine with me.





Serenity4321 said:


> I think it is healthy to enjoy and be comfortable being alone. I have no problem doing so. I do rely on u-tube a lot. LOL I think one can find anything on u-tube!!  I have noticed sometimes when I feel tired and then talk to people I am totally energized..people do that for me so when I go anywhere I talk to everyone..


You can travel many places on u tube. People online so that is nice. I haven't fully determined who the night people are yet.  Late nights felt too lonely for me, so this site has been very helpful.



Ruthanne said:


> I am a person who needs my space and aloneness at times.  It varies as to how long I take breaks from people.  Depends really.


Yes, it helps to gather your thoughts from time to time.


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## Jules (Jun 25, 2022)

The spouse of a friend who recently passed said he was fine in the daytime.  It was at night that he missed the little chatter.  Nothing special said, just comments here and there.


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## PamfromTx (Jun 25, 2022)

Does speaking to self count as another person?  If that is the case then I'm a chatterbox.


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## sassysatin (Jun 25, 2022)

I've gone as much as 3 days without speaking and I live with the man - just the two of us.


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## Mitch86 (Jun 25, 2022)

sassysatin said:


> I've gone as much as 3 days without speaking and I live with the man - just the two of us.


Obviously, both of you need other partners.


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## Patricia (Jun 25, 2022)

palides2021 said:


> Wishing you a speedy reovery!


I hope you feel better soon.


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## chrislind2 (Jul 5, 2022)

I communicate with my daughter and my sister fairly often with messenger, text messages and emails. I talk to the checker at the grocery store, but that likely doesn't count. I guest a matter of a week or more most of the time. Never think about it much. When my daughter calls I'm always afraid something is wrong or she needs money. The quiet and the lack of constant demands on my time make me wonder what I was thinking when I got married. Always enjoyed time alone and now that I'm retired it is really great. Only one month left until I will start drawing on my retirement mutual fund and have some real financial stability.


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## Duncanzmom (Jul 5, 2022)

Bella said:


> It depends. I can go a week or longer without speaking to anyone I know, and it doesn't bother me to go longer than that. Sometimes the only people I speak to are store clerks. There are times I just don't feel like speaking to anyone. In which case I just let calls go to voice mail and I don't make plans to see anyone. If I don't feel like talking, I'm just not compelled to see people or pick up the phone.
> 
> If I get questioned, I honestly tell people that I haven't called back or made a date because I just haven't felt like talking. I'm not mad at anyone or anti-social, sometimes it's just so much drivel and I don't wanna hear it because it wears me out. I have no problem being alone and no trouble amusing myself.
> 
> ...


I am thrilled to read your reply about not speaking to people and not apologizing for it. I can become easily overwhelmed by too much noise, multiple conversations across a table, crying children, vocal arguments between other people, etc.  It drains me to have to keep all that at bay. So I take breaks from some people in my life, especially the emotional vampires who lay a guilt trip when I don't return their calls in a timely fashion. 

Since my husband died last August and my dog died in December I've spent lots of days in my own company and I'm fine with it. I've come to accept that my own peace of mind is more important than someone else's expectation of what a "friend" is supposed to do.


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## Bella (Jul 5, 2022)

Hi @Duncanzmom. Welcome to the forum! 

My condolences on the loss of your husband and dog. It might sound trite to say that I know how you feel, but I do. My husband died suddenly four years ago, and I also lost my lovely elkhound. Many of us here are widowed.

Nope, I don't feel the need to apologize for needing peace and quiet. Establishing boundaries in relationships is important. Good for you for keeping the "emotional vampires" at bay. If you don't, they'll suck the life out of you. 

Why don't you take a little spin over to the Intro forum and introduce yourself to everybody and tell us a bit more about yourself? I know they'd love to meet you! >  https://www.seniorforums.com/forums/introductions.15/

Bella


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## Alligatorob (Jul 5, 2022)

C50 said:


> How long do you go without talking to others? - I have an older brother ( not a very nice person) who will go months without talking to anyone.


Interesting thread, I must have missed in in June.

My story is however not interesting, I rarely go more than a few hours.  Like @Pecos when younger I did some solo camping, for a day or so it was ok, but once I went for a week.  Did not like that.

Used to be a Trappist monastery near the Snow Basin ski area in Utah.  They never spoke to each other, and had little interaction with anyone else.  Often went months or years without speaking to another person.  They did have a small gift shop and visitors center.  The monk working it was always quite talkative, and friendly.  Sometimes it was hard to get away from him.  I suspect that was a coveted job.  Abbey of Our Lady of the Holy Trinity


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## Alligatorob (Jul 5, 2022)

Wren said:


> Could’ve save myself a lot of heartache if I’d taken a leaf out of his book....


LOL, must be why he made woman, someone to talk to.


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## DebraMae (Jul 5, 2022)

I can go a long time without talking to anyone, weeks.  I was laughing about it with another single woman who lives down the road.  I like being alone, doing what I want to do, eating what I want to eat, etc., and she does too.  Family keeps asking, "but what do you do?" Seems like I stay busy and content.  Even took my first solo vacation after retirement and now I don't think twice about taking off by myself in my old car. Sometimes I talk to myself though.  My mother used to do that and said it was because she liked to talk to someone intelligent every once in a while.


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## Patricia (Jul 5, 2022)

I can't think of a day I haven't talked to someone.


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## Victor (Jul 14, 2022)

I have gone weeks without a social personal conversation. Once I went months for no reason.
But  business and health talking  I don't count. I write down the days that I talk to a friend
so I know exactly who and when and how long. I figure out all the hours I have a social conversation every year, it is predictable. Not counting email or text. I even figured this out over my lifetime.


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