# Yikes!  Back in the dating pool again.



## Brookswood (Dec 18, 2016)

I am fresh on the dating market again after a 5 year relationship ended, albeit on a good note overall.  I am in my mid 60's.  So I signed with an online service since meeting new women who are in my age group, single etc. is not an easy task. Why is it when you are married there seems to be attractive single men and women everywhere, and when you are single every attractive man/woman seems to be married or attached to someone who is richer and better looking than you?

I find I am inundated with women from 1 to 7 years older than me.    Based on their photos some can't be much over 50,  but their age says  they are 66 to72.   

Either I am a very lucky guy or my leg is being pulled.

  The whole thing is exciting at times and scary at others.


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## Carla (Dec 18, 2016)

Women generally do not lie about being older, my guess it's the picture that is "older". Maybe a woman a few years older wouldn't be a big deal unless you prefer someone a lot younger. I wish you luck, it sounds a little like an adventure, hope you find some interesting ladies!


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## Butterfly (Dec 19, 2016)

Yeah, Carla, I don't know any women who would lie about being older.  Younger -- now that's another question!


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## Buckeye (Dec 19, 2016)

Well, at 70 I'm not really interested in dating but if I were I'd be using my high school graduation picture from 1964.


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## tnthomas (Dec 20, 2016)

Brookswood said:


> I am fresh on the dating market again....... so I signed with an online service since meeting new women.




Glutton-for-punishment.


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## Brookswood (Dec 20, 2016)

tnthomas said:


> Glutton-for-punishment.



I thought about just walking away from it with the idea that if a good woman was dropped in my lap fine, otherwise I would put my efforts into other things.

But, my female cousin, who is my age, upon hearing this grabbed me and throttled me to within an inch of my life all the while screaming " You Jughead!  There are zillions of women your age waiting for a man like you to show up!"   When I asked what she meant by man like me (intelligent, sophisticated, good lucking, charming, worldly, suave, debonair, etc???.) she replied that I was a catch because  - "you have a modest income,  you do not drink to excess and you bathe regularly".   Oh well, better that than to be living alone in a hobo camp.


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## Agewell22 (Dec 20, 2016)

Very neat!! I've been married for 40 years and there have been a few times where I've wished I was in your position  Best of luck to you and let me know how the online dating goes never got a chance to try it for myself.


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## Brookswood (Dec 20, 2016)

Agewell22 said:


> Very neat!! I've been married for 40 years and there have been a few times where I've wished I was in your position  Best of luck to you and let me know how the online dating goes never got a chance to try it for myself.



In my experience, when one is married there are attractive, intelligent, charming and available women hanging out on every street corner, shopping center, dog park,library, etc. in your neighborhood.  When you get married, all of these wonderful women are suddenly married or going with guys who are far better looking, far more entertaining, far more sophisticated  and far richer than you.  Go figure......


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## Marie5656 (Dec 20, 2016)

*Interesting issue.  Rick and I got together rather late in life...mid 40's.  We have been married 15 years.  If it should happen I lose Rick first, I do not see me getting back in the water.  I'd be just as happy just doing things socially with friends or through church.*


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## Butterfly (Dec 25, 2016)

The dating pool is a place I will not enter again.  I don't need all the drama, and I'm quite happy by myself.


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## silla (Dec 30, 2016)

Brookswood said:


> I thought about just walking away from it with the idea that if a good woman was dropped in my lap fine, otherwise I would put my efforts into other things.
> 
> But, my female cousin, who is my age, upon hearing this grabbed me and throttled me to within an inch of my life all the while screaming " You Jughead!  There are zillions of women your age waiting for a man like you to show up!"   When I asked what she meant by man like me (intelligent, sophisticated, good lucking, charming, worldly, suave, debonair, etc???.) she replied that I was a catch because  - "you have a modest income,  you do not drink to excess and you bathe regularly".   Oh well, better that than to be living alone in a hobo camp.



When I first entertained the notion of dating (ugh, I loathed dating in my 20's . . . imagine what I think about it now, lol) I felt that serendipity was the only possible avenue in this chapter of my life . . . but once I realized that I was not likely going to magically meet Mr. Right on an aisle in Kroger, I very hesitantly registered on Match . . . took me a few days to decide that was a mistake, but I let my trial subscription run out and then I ran for the hills. I basically stuck around to conduct a character study of sorts, and boy was it enlightening! Interestingly, about a year later, I tried Zoosk . . . not quite so bad, but nonetheless awful, frightening, frustrating, filled with scammers and . . . that was that . . . never again, I say! So now . . . I'm back to serendipity. 

I figure if "he" is out there somewhere and destiny brings us together, great . . . if not, fine and dandy!


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## OneEyedDiva (Jan 9, 2017)

I would not want to be in your position! I said if my husband dies before me or if we split, I DON'T want another one. I don't care how fine or how rich he may be. Don't want him. I will be 70 next month but I've been "carded" for as young as 48. A few bus drivers and restaurant servers thought I wasn't entitled to the senior fare and senior menu deal.  People keep telling me I never change. Perhaps these women are the age they say they are.  Anyway... good luck to you!


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## dog lover (Jan 9, 2017)

Not for me either. I buried two husbands and that is that. I actually enjoy living alone, so much freedom. I like to cook and can experiment to my heart's content. I like to garden and I like playing with my dogs - no one needed to help me enjoy my life. It took a good while for friends to finally stop trying to set me up. It seems that others just don't understand that I am quite happy living alone.


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## Butterfly (Jan 9, 2017)

Dog Lover, I have experienced that others just can't grasp why I'm just fine with living by myself, too.   I enjoy the freedom of doing what I want to WHEN I want to.  The idea of having a retired husband under foot 24/7 makes my blood run cold.


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## Carla (Jan 9, 2017)

My husband and I retired six months of each other and those few years we had were our best ones. We were very close, thought alike and enjoyed each other's company. We actually worked in the same department for a number of years. You know, we always think we have more time then suddenly, they're gone. What a shock. Just like that. Today is 30th.

I have also gotten used to living alone and it's not all that bad. I can't imagine dealing with the ups and downs of a relationship and any of the stress it involves! No one could possibly replace what I lost and that's not to say there aren't lot of nice guys out there. I place value on any friendships that might come my way, but no energy left for anything more.

Back to the subject. Brookswood, there are many more women out there looking, it shouldn't take long to meet someone! Heck, I thought by now you would have acquired a "following", haha. (Only kidding) No, I hope you meet someone special to possibly share your life with. I always think timing is a huge part of it. Many times people meet by being in a place they either didn't plan on being or some other unusual circumstance. It just seems to happen.


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## Brookswood (Jan 9, 2017)

It's an individual thing and not something to be taken lightly.    I know people who swore they would never remarry, and then, from out of the blue, comes somebody who just complete there life. OTOH, I also know people who marry again int he hope they can replace a spouse and soon they are miserable. 

No point in rushing anything.  We each do what we need to do for ourselves.  That is best.


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## dog lover (Jan 9, 2017)

At this stage in my life, I am way too set in my ways and totally unwilling to compromise on anything. That would make me a very bad partner. My first husband died early in his 30s, after 10 years of a so/so marriage. My second died after 30 years of a great marriage. Now it's my time, and my time alone to do whatever I please, whenever I want. I worked long and hard to get where I am, and now I will just live and enjoy what I have been working for. A new partner just would not fit anymore. I am totally disinterested.


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## Lon (Jan 9, 2017)

I went on a dating binge a few months after the death of my wife in 1989. She would have approved)

I was in my mid 50's and about ready to retire. I had a beautiful home and was quite comfortable financially. I am no fool and realized that I might be a good catch as they say,  for some lady. I had a field day. Every friend and family member had some one they wanted to introduce me to that they thought would be a great match for me. I wanted to re-marry because I liked married life. I also was interested in finding a single female with a Net Worth close to my own to preclude the GOLD DIGGER THING. After dating 38 women I finally was introduced to a super lady by her adult daughter. We dated for six months, lived together for six months and then married. I never dated any of the females that my friends and family came up with. I am assertive and would see a woman in the super market that caught my eye. If she didn't have a wedding ring I would flirt and try to engage light conversation. Most of my dating until the one I married was with women that I met on my own.

The woman that I married was a Registered Nurse and Certified Nurse Midwife that had delivered hundreds of babies and our assets were equal.


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## Brookswood (Feb 17, 2017)

OK I am getting an inferiority complex trying to find a good women who is retired.  Based upon the online profiles most of them seem to have this as a typical day: 

Not a family day:  Wake up, workout at the gym for 2-3 hours. After a healthy gourmet lunch they prepare at home, it's off the golf course for 18 holes,  back home again for the gourmet dinner prepared in her kitchen. Then a drive up to the slopes for some night skiing.   End the day with one of the men in her life, have the best vigorous sex imaginable.   Wake up the next morning and repeat (perhaps with another man since she must have worn the poor guy out the day before).

On family days: get up, make gourmet breakfast for children and grand children.  Then take grandkids to gym where they share a 3 hour work out with grandma.  Then, a healthy lunch at grandma's house. Follow that with an afternoon visit to a museum where they attend a lecture on the the latest advances in particle physics.  Then make a gourmet meal for the grandkids and their parents who have come buy to pick them up, but not before, writing and performing a three act play with the grandkids  for the parents entertainment.   After sending them all home, write two or three more chapters of her next best selling novel, then have a nightcap at the local bar and invite the young bartender over to give each other a massage. 








T


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## Buckeye (Feb 17, 2017)

I'm 70 and was widowed for the second time about a year ago.  I was advised to look for a "nurse with a purse" - someone who could take care of me physically and financially.

So far no luck.  But to be fair, I'm not really looking.


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## hauntedtexan (Feb 17, 2017)

My old friend passed away about the same time as my wife did and I recently reconnected with his wonderful wife and also an old friend. Just bought her a plane ticket to sunny and warm Texas nervously hoping we could have a connection, but expecting a great rekindled friendship. Been 5 years of "widowhood" for us, so it must be a low pressure, fun adventure.... Peace Y'all


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## Shalimar (Feb 17, 2017)

Brookswood said:


> OK I am getting an inferiority complex trying to find a good women who is retired.  Based upon the online profiles most of them seem to have this as a typical day:
> 
> Not a family day:  Wake up, workout at the gym for 2-3 hours. After a healthy gourmet lunch they prepare at home, it's off the golf course for 18 holes,  back home again for the gourmet dinner prepared in her kitchen. Then a drive up to the slopes for some night skiing.   End the day with one of the men in her life, have the best vigorous sex imaginable.   Wake up the next morning and repeat (perhaps with another man since she must have worn the poor guy out the day before).
> 
> ...


Eek!


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## GeorgiaXplant (Feb 18, 2017)

Just change the gender and add a few things...you'll have the men's profiles. LOL  Except that they spend their time at their g'kids' school events, walking on the beach, hiking in the mountains, hosting their (very successful) children, or traveling to visit their (very successful) children. Add to that that they're all "fit and toned" and gourmet cooks. Let's not forgot the (long) paragraph about what they USED to do (very successfully, of course).

They're so busy, so active, so engaged in alumni groups, golf, community, church, and family, one really has to wonder where on earth they find the time to fit in even a 30-minute coffee date.


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