What are Some of Your Likes, Dislikes, in Your Own Spouse?

hearlady

hearlady

Every Day is a New Day.
Location
N Carolina
My husband has a lot of good qualities. I like that he is very "take charge". He's frugal but not cheap.

On the other hand, he is not controlling but has to control EVERYTHING if that makes sense.

Qualities in your spouse can be endearing or highly annoying depending on which way the wind is blowing!
 

I like that he makes breakfast every morning and also washes the dishes afterwards. If I'm cleaning something else in the house, he'll run the vacuum. After I wash and dry laundry, he puts his own clothing away.

He never swears. He's frugal. He's good tempered. He listens when spoken to and doesn't offer his opinion unless it's asked for and visa versa.
 
My husband was generous to a fault. We once figured out that he probably gave out about $75 a week to people who popped into his store asking to "borrow" money, which of course he never got back. That would have been fine if he could afford it, but really he couldn't, especially when times got tough financially for his customers. He also was often late for things. What used to annoy me most about that is that he'd let others (usually his grown children) upset our vacation plans by causing us to leave late. Some of those times I lost patience and took the bus (if going to our timeshare) and let him come down whenever.
 
hollydolly said:
Well it's a moot point now... but the thing I disliked most about my husband apart from his love affair with alcohol...was the fact that he wouldn't hold conversations unless it was work related...
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My husband prefers to discuss news, TV programmes, general things. Anything but feelings and emotions, he hates that and changes the subject very quickly or remains silent. Typical English reserve.
 
Rose65 said:
My husband prefers to discuss news, TV programmes, general things. Anything but feelings and emotions, he hates that and changes the subject very quickly or remains silent. Typical English reserve.
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Smart man. Men are not that complicated. Feelings and emotions are things women 'wear on their sleeves'.
Men don't talk about those things because its a primal reaction. Showing those feelings can expose weaknesses. Its not a conscious thing, its at a subconscious level.
Its one of the thing that separate women from men. Its part of the protective side men have.
 
Sippican said:
Don't have a spouse, nor do I want one.
Do what I want, when I want, buy what I want......answer to no one.
I keep my bicycle in my kitchen. People ask me 'why'. I say 'because I can'.
Just me and my dog and she doesn't care what I do as long as she can come with me.
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I say all this, but I am in a 12 year relationship. 12 years of 'dating'. She feels the same way I do. Because we are in our 60's we like our independence but also like being a 'couple'. When we 'disagree', she goes home, or I go home. We get over it, and move one. Works for us.
 
Like that my Wife is so adaptable to the many changes I've thrown her way.

The time she landed in the UK and I told her she had 2 weeks to learn to drive on the other side
of the road, the difference in the money and I'd be gone for up to 3 months this time.

The time I told her the base was closing and we had to move to another UK base.

Desert Storm kicked off and I would be gone for quite awhile...

When our time was up in the UK and we were moving to California.

Took us less then a month to decide to move to Nashville to be closer to our Sons.

36 years later and she still just rolls with whatever is thrown her way.
 
The only real complaint that I have is that every time we go somewhere, it takes her forever to get in the car. This has been going on for years. I have spoken to her about this, but not anymore because I always get a list of reasons why it takes so long before she gets in the car. The list has about 15 items on it why it takes her so long. A few I have to laugh at.

The one reason she tells me (from the list) is that she has to check all 6 doors that lead to the outside are locked. I keep telling her she doesn’t have to do that. When the one door gets manually locked, the system automatically checks the other 5 doors to make sure their locked, but she doesn’t trust the system. She said she has to check them herself for peace of mind.
 
We met just before Halloween 1984, This January we have been living together 39 years. Its not always been perfect, but we both had the mindset that it would not always be perfect. We have struggled with several real hard times, But used that opportunity to grow together, not apart. 5 years ago, we sold our house and moved into 226 Sq/Ft camper, talk about a tiny home. We haven't killed one another yet.
 
old medic said:
We met just before Halloween 1984, This January we have been living together 39 years. Its not always been perfect, but we both had the mindset that it would not always be perfect. We have struggled with several real hard times, But used that opportunity to grow together, not apart. 5 years ago, we sold our house and moved into 226 Sq/Ft camper, talk about a tiny home. We haven't killed one another yet.
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That is close quarters. Do you bump into each other a lot? That would improve your physical contact senses. :)
 
he tries very hard but often misses the mark
in buying items he thinks I LIKE when it is he who likes that and uses me as excuse ...

it has been a struggle as we get older i thought it was a hearing problem and he got hearings aids but only wears them when going out. not at home. lots of "I thought you said this"................ I say "wear the hearing aids"

now i see it is a listening thing not his hearing....
 
Sippican said:
Smart man. Men are not that complicated. Feelings and emotions are things women 'wear on their sleeves'.
Men don't talk about those things because its a primal reaction. Showing those feelings can expose weaknesses. Its not a conscious thing, its at a subconscious level.
Its one of the thing that separate women from men. Its part of the protective side men have.
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Maybe so, but it makes me feel a gap between us. He may be smart but he is missing out on the best of me. Only through allowing yourself to be vulnerable can you have real connection.
But we are used to each other now, after all the years, so we carry on best we can.
 
Likes- He goes out of his way to help me
- will search everywhere to find something for me without me asking ( it’s totally sweet but unnecessary )
- he’s generous
- he now knows how to cook and often cooks for me
- he’s a handy man and then some ( he can fix just about anything )
- he is very resourceful
- he won’t ever forget a birthday
- the dogs and cat always have a Mother’s Day card each year which they personally pick themselves 😉
- he randomly picks lilacs, wild lupins or an assortment of wild flowers 💐
- he randomly surprises me with things he knows I like IMG_3073.jpegIMG_3072.jpeg

He buys the sweetest Valentine’s Day cards and I always get the nicest chocolates
IMG_3071.jpeg

I don’t wish to share what I don’t like
This is a 34 year old relationship that’s had it’s ups and downs like any other relationship
 
BF is not my spouse yet, but we've been together for 5 years. Why we are not married is because I find him a perfectionist and I cannot live up to that nor do I want the stress of trying. Dealing with endless criticism is wearing. Otherwise we're fine and get along ok on a day to day basis well. In my heart though, I feel he wants/needs to be married more than I do, and may one day find a woman who is not put off by his perfectionism and he'll ride off into the sunset with her.
 
chic said:
BF is not my spouse yet, but we've been together for 5 years. Why we are not married is because I find him a perfectionist and I cannot live up to that nor do I want the stress of trying. Dealing with endless criticism is wearing. Otherwise we're fine and get along ok on a day to day basis well. In my heart though, I feel he wants/needs to be married more than I do, and may one day find a woman who is not put off by his perfectionism and he'll ride off into the sunset with her.
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Maybe he sees all the goodness in you that we do. You don’t give yourself enough credit
 
We have been married 50+ years. Like all, we have had our ups and downs. Good years and bad years. We been poor and un-poor! We both have been blessed with good health. We raised three great kids, who have blessed us with six grandchildren and now we have one great grandson.

All the small things, likes and dislikes don't amount to much at this point. We are best friends and still lovers...I never thought it would be this good for this long. We work at it...we don't fight, we "discuss"! If she is irritating me, I walk away as does she, when I irritate her. I cannot stay mad at her, and I honestly cannot recall her every being mad at me. Our kids tell us they think we are a bit 'weird', and we probably are.
As long as we both are weird, it works!

Enjoy folks, life is short! I have already lived longer than my parents, grandparents, great grandparents and all of my wife's family...
So, when I say life is short, you can bet I believe it! I don't really fear death or think about it much. But I do focus on enjoying each day.
 
chic said:
BF is not my spouse yet, but we've been together for 5 years. Why we are not married is because I find him a perfectionist and I cannot live up to that nor do I want the stress of trying. Dealing with endless criticism is wearing. Otherwise we're fine and get along ok on a day to day basis well. In my heart though, I feel he wants/needs to be married more than I do, and may one day find a woman who is not put off by his perfectionism and he'll ride off into the sunset with her.
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I can't and won't put up with criticism in a relationship...
 
Jeni said:
he tries very hard but often misses the mark
in buying items he thinks I LIKE when it is he who likes that and uses me as excuse ...

it has been a struggle as we get older i thought it was a hearing problem and he got hearings aids but only wears them when going out. not at home. lots of "I thought you said this"................ I say "wear the hearing aids"

now i see it is a listening thing not his hearing....
Click to expand...
Well, it may not be listening either. It's probably not understanding (clarity).
Either way it's not fun.
 


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